I AM SO PATHETIC! Please help me.

[PVSSY-EATER]

Double I hope you were not calling me an idiot, but if you were, bite me.

The bottom line is this, if your self worth and value is in getting a good job, getting a nice car, getting good friends, and getting a good girl, your self worth is in the wrong place. Your self worth should come from within. okay....now, let me finish.....

The kid is sad because he is not getting girls, and because of that, he thinks he is an AFC, he thinks he is afraid of women, he just THINKS this way. The keyword is THINK.

Kid, the DJ Bible, is great, but trust me, most of these posters here turn a SIMPLE thing like getting ***** or getting a quality girl into CHEMISTRY 101. The bottom line is this,

Create your own world.

Then go out and add things in.

You see a girl you like, not want, but like, keyword is like, because you dont know if you WANT her or not, because she could be a psycho. All you have to go off is whats on the outside of her right now. You approach, start a light convo, say you are doing whatever on whatever day, and that she should come by or meet you there or whatever. Get her number and split. If she flakes, it was NOT your fault, because you DID what a don juan does. She is the MESSED UP one. But if you keep listening to most of these so-called Senior Don Juan posters, you will place your worth and value in how a woman likes you, and MOST TIMES, YES AND I AM BEING HONEST, Most times, women reject you, AND IT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.

 

[coder]

Boy, can I relate to you. I WAS you, except probably not as good. The main thing you have to do is get in the game. You will never get a date if you don’t ask for any. Rejection hurts and destroys confidence. But here’s the secret. It only hurts as much as you make it hurt. You probably don’t believe this, but it’s true. You pick out a girl you want to pursue and try to get the confidence to ask her out. You start convincing yourself she is so great to motivate yourself to ask her. You ignore her faults and strengthen her good points in your mind and by the time you actually make a move, you think she is a goddess. This is how you contract oneitous. Don’t do that. Here is the deal. She’s not a goddess. There are a whole bunch of woman who are as good or better. You need to learn to risk rejection or you will never get anywhere. Try talking to women that are not as attractive for practice. Half the population of the planet is women. They are not some rare thing that is difficult to find. Talk to women where ever you find them. When you drive through a fast food joint to get a burger, if the cashier is remotely attractive, make eye contact and use a nice tone of voice with her and see how she reacts. It’s practice. Ask out some girls that are a little lower than your standards. It’s just a date, not a marriage proposal. It will help build confidence. And don’t think that you can only ask out one at a time. A date does not obligate you to be faithful.

I have noticed that just by improving my posture and talking in a confident tone of voice, everywhere I go people treat me better. It’s amazing. I also have noticed that most people do not have good posture and good tonality. These are easy to fix. Just talk by using the abdomen and fraise sentences like statements, not questions, and the difference is huge.

You say you have friends that are successful with women. That is a great asset! Watch them and try what they do. Don’t be shy, what is there to lose? You say you are good at drawing and painting? What a great asset that is! There must be a Quad or some place at your university where people, including women, hang out. Go there and start drawing whatever. It gives you an excuse to be looking around and a conversation topic. Start up a conversation with the first women you see and ask for her phone number. Get in the game! From what you have said, you are quite a catch, so give some women the chance to catch you.

 

[PVSSY-EATER]

I hope that you understand what I am saying in my reply. Its great to have ambition and motivation to approach 1,000 girls a week!! But without any inner strength and inner value, rejection can become depressing and cause you to give up, because you would still be placing your value on the outside. -----bye for now

 

[Robbie]

Originally posted by frivolousz21
if you actually go out and do ur own thing you still wont get laid.

you wont get a women

you wont have them chasing after you

you wont get over ur fear of approaching them.

you should make a goal of bettering your game..if you dont start cold approaching, working out, posture, clothes, speech, work on it all. make it a goal for you to get better at talking to women..

dont go out and do whatever..do whatever and get the women.

Solid advice. We each have our own strengths and weaknesses, and many of us have lots of stuff going on in our lives outside of relationships. The problem is that these strengths and occupations DO NOT translate into love and attention... unless you look like a model and have women approaching you all day long.

For the rest of us, being busy with ourselves and doing things we love may actually preclude us from meeting women, especially those of us who are more introverted at times. You've GOT to make the effort to get out there. They won't come looking for you unless you become rich and famous.

 

[Enzo]

All I can say is that I have been in your position and through the loneliness I toughened up and learned to depend on me for my satisfaction. I still feel lonely often but I dont feel like I need anyone and if a girl says no, I can pick myself from he floor and move on.

Contrary to popular belief, a DJ does not need to cold approach. That is the level of a playa. A DJ makes life work for him. That means that if he cannot cold approach. He finds hot spots that have plenty of women and it is a place where he feels comfortable interacting with them. (Salsa is a great place to do this and improve your confidence)

Dont focus on finding anyone to love you. It really hurts but focus on enjoyoing your life and building your confidence. Find a hobby and things to focus your attention on, take care of how you look. Treat yourself to some new stuff. When you love yourself, it shows and people get interesting in loving you.

These are lessons that I am still learning and although they take time and are hard, I am glad I am learning them because they are setting me free.

edit
As for cold approaching. I have a VERY low level of natural self confidence but I found that doing small stuff like trying to hold eye contact and letting a girl know you are checking her out. Go up to a girl and try confidently asking her to borrow a pen or a tissue. See how she reacts, often it is warm and you realise that women are not monsters they just want to be approached with a bit of sincerity and respect not the "yo baby come ere" attitude. Afterwards try to strike up a conversation and vibe with her. Dont go for the kill just get use to chatting and vibing (I need to do this more myself) It really boosted my confidence when I did this.

I am just working myself up to the level where i can cold approach but the journey is fun and the final reward is great.

It is nerve racking, and the first few times it feels crap, but after a few rejections it does not bother you at all and you feel more of a man than the guy that sits there doing nothing. Most of all it is fun!

 

[tmpgstx]

Here's how it is. If i'm understanding you right you're intelligent and all your friends are intelligent. None of your friends have girlfriends, if you're working there is no one there, and your classes may be primarily male.

This is what happened to me, my friends were all smart too, so smart that it wasn't easy to communicate or be attractive to an average or below average intelligent girl. It's one helluva a bottleneck because there aren't very many intelligent girls on the 'scene' and if there are, most are taken!! In short, it's going to take an intelligent girl to appreciate you and your efforts in school. The others couldn't a rat's ass, all they care about is partying etc.

So, you have to find an intelligent girl, but how? Not too mention one that is single. It's not easy but you know who they are when you talk to them. Do things with them that you're both interested. I wouldn't recommend cold pick-ups at all.

It is true, you have to dumb yourself down if you want these fluzies that frequent the bar scene.

My suggestion would be when you meet that attractive intelligent girl, become friends with her first and go from there. Don't be over ambitiious in getting her as a girlfriend right away.

 

[Maximus Rex]

GRAB YOUR NUTS AND HOLLA AT HER

Women want men to be men. Women LOVE strong, confident, funny, slightly arrogant men. Let me say that again, women want men to be men. Women LOVE strong, confident, funny, slightly arrogant men. For all you shy guys who are intimated by women, the sooner you understand and accept that that and make that statement part of your personal dogma. The closer you’ll be to dumping your goo all over some chick’s chest and face. You shy guys have to understand something about women. Unless you’re some sort of celebrity, women aren’t just going to throw themselves at you. That’s do societal norms and just the way women are wired. That being said, in order to get some a$$, your going to have to start approaching and interacting with women. How pray tell, do a shy guy get girls? That’s what I’m going to discuss today. If you have a problem with shyness and confidence, the only way to overcome it is to “take the bull by the horns,” and face it head on. A good way to start is by engaging in conversations with strangers. The next time, you in the store. Ask the Arab what country in the Middle East he’s from. Then do some research about the country and ask the Arab about it. Ask your teacher why he/she went into teaching. Talk to everybody and anybody. Then move on to saying “hi,” to people. With a smile on your face, say “Hi, how are you doing?” You might want to engage in some small talk. After a month of this, you’ll be ready to move on to chicks. Remember that women want men to be men. Women LOVE strong, confident, funny, slightly arrogant men. You see a chick you like. Establish eye contact and smile. She should smile back. Say this to yourself, “women LOVE strong, confident, funny, slightly arrogant men. Grab your nuts. (Don’t let her see you grab your nuts) and approach her. Use the world’s most effective pickup line. (Hi. How are you doing?) Proceed to kick it. More than likely you’re going to get shot down. What do you expect? You suck at talking to women. Getting the number isn’t what’s important. The fact that you stepped to her is. You confronted your fear and dealt with it head on. Good man. Now, get back in there and do it again. Don’t expect to go from being a shy guy to having the game of a pimp overnight. This is going to take hard work and dedication. You’re going to continue to get shot down. Don’t let it get to you. You’re making progress. The more you step to woman the greater your confidence will become and the more your reticence will lessen. Soon talking to women will become no big deal. Eventually you’ll get a number. Remember the first tenant of the Dogma Omipotens Maximus Rex. Women want men to be men. Women LOVE confident, funny, slightly arrogant men. Approach women like you’re the $hit. If you don’t think you’re the catch of the 21st century, then how in the hell is she going to think you’re the catch of the 21st century. It’s imperative that you remember that. There’s going to be times that when you think this all for naught. When you’ve kicked to twenty chicks and don’t have $hit to show for it. Don’t let it bother you. You’re making progress and your getting better. You have to believe and understand that women want men to be men, and they LOVE confident, funny, slightly arrogant men. If you go in with any nervousness, self-doubt, or desperation. She’s going to see it from a mile away. You might as well no even try. The summer is coming up. These chicks are horny, their ****s are itching, they’re moist in pants, they want to give head jobs, and eff. (With a rubber of course.) These girls want your goo in their weave. Your mission is to be the guy that’s nuttin on them. I believe in you. Believe in yourself. Now get out there and holla at some chicks.

 

[Robbie]

Re: GRAB YOUR NUTS AND HOLLA AT HER

Maximus Rex, one hell of a post!

You got me all psyched up to go out there and... do what we do best.

Everyone have fun tonight.

 

[ZeQ]

Thanks guys, you have been really helpfull.

 

[I_Only_Live_Once]

so how are you now?
the post was strangely amusing, I don't know why.

 

[Kerensky]

Originally posted by xiola
some people are just destinied to be alone

LOL nice

seirously bro. you're pathetic because you're hypocritical. you posted this cuz you ran outta **** to read and now you want comments. bizatch!!

 

[WillieandThePoorBoys]

One thing I have noticed that I haven't seens anyone mention yet centers on the fact that there is more than one form of confidence. What I've noticed in myself as well as many other people, is the tendency for people who are extremely confident in one area of their life to fall to pieces in another. I'm currently in law school for example. A part of our study is what is known as a 'moot court', this essentially means that we have to get up in front of a few judges and argue cases - we get shot down, butchered, and damn near insulted - I've done this a few times, and it's never difficult. That takes confidence. However, turn me around and make me ask a woman for her number and the butterflys return, the mind races, and frankly I'm scared ****less. In other words I have no real confidence when it comes to woman. Now I've improved over the last few months, thanks partially to this site, but mostly to the fact that eventually I just said "no, maintaining the status quo - maintaining that awkward, near paralyzing inability around women is not the way to lead the best life possible". I think that's ultimately whats really needed. They say necessity is the mother of invention, and I think that that applys to women as well. Once men who are shy, self-conscious, and timid around women reach that point where they've simply had enough of living the solitary life things will begin to change. I think that's what happened in my situation. But there has been marked progress since that one "I've had enough" - moment popped into my mind. I think that's what's happened here - if you can harness the need to change your life to the energy that every individual has to make those changes manifest things will improve. Not only on the female front - but in all aspects of your life.