h2o
Banned
Sure. That’s great, and I thought I'd email you to keep this thread on topic somewhat.
I am so lonely
- Thread starter kk2004
- Start date
Disconnect
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2004
- Messages
- 524
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- 36
First off, the book by Carneige is great, though takes its time getting to the point.
Now, I'd like to mention this: your anxiety and low self esteem are perceived by other people. As is your desperation to meet new friends. People sense that desperation. It's largely subconscious, but what it tells them is this: I am so starved for any human contact, so I would have anyone as my tampon! So they stay away.
Do you ever think about how the universe seems to favor the nonchalant? A famous movie actor, already with more script offers than he can ever manage, keeps getting new ones every day, while another poor shlep can't even land a role in a B movie. Or how about a successful business contractor who has deal after deal waiting so he can make even more money that he doesn't need? This is because 'god helps those who help themselves'. So start working on yourself. Go out there, and place yourself in uncomfortable situations until you get used to them.
I would also like to recommend you a book. It helped me alot, and is a must read on FastSeduction. It doesn't beat around the bush, and the author used to be alot like yourself, until he figured it all out. The book's called "Without Embarrassment Seduction System" by Michael Pilinski. It helped me out of a situation that you are currently in.
And most of all, have fun!
Now, I'd like to mention this: your anxiety and low self esteem are perceived by other people. As is your desperation to meet new friends. People sense that desperation. It's largely subconscious, but what it tells them is this: I am so starved for any human contact, so I would have anyone as my tampon! So they stay away.
Do you ever think about how the universe seems to favor the nonchalant? A famous movie actor, already with more script offers than he can ever manage, keeps getting new ones every day, while another poor shlep can't even land a role in a B movie. Or how about a successful business contractor who has deal after deal waiting so he can make even more money that he doesn't need? This is because 'god helps those who help themselves'. So start working on yourself. Go out there, and place yourself in uncomfortable situations until you get used to them.
I would also like to recommend you a book. It helped me alot, and is a must read on FastSeduction. It doesn't beat around the bush, and the author used to be alot like yourself, until he figured it all out. The book's called "Without Embarrassment Seduction System" by Michael Pilinski. It helped me out of a situation that you are currently in.
And most of all, have fun!
Thank You
So i guess step one would be to go out and reduce my anxiety in and around people in general. That is gonna come from my self hypnoiss, I gotta use postitive reinforcemnt, in my everyday dealings with people. I gotta keep telling myself that im not inferior. Thn after that I have to place myself in those difficult situations. Sarging is so hard though, say I see a group of girls, its just so hard to go up to them and start convo, bcuz its not a normal set. This applies to even single girls, and guys who i feel scared from, no set is normal enough, so its just hard to talk to people.
So i guess step one would be to go out and reduce my anxiety in and around people in general. That is gonna come from my self hypnoiss, I gotta use postitive reinforcemnt, in my everyday dealings with people. I gotta keep telling myself that im not inferior. Thn after that I have to place myself in those difficult situations. Sarging is so hard though, say I see a group of girls, its just so hard to go up to them and start convo, bcuz its not a normal set. This applies to even single girls, and guys who i feel scared from, no set is normal enough, so its just hard to talk to people.
catch
Senior Don Juan
hey kk2004, just so that you know...
your starting of at a point in your life where most people have been... yes your starting... your sitting there, in your chair and your reading these posts from great people...
i know that you feel better for reding this... you are looking for answers, answers you were unable to find yourself...and here they are, vague they may seem, none the less your answers are here...
kk2004, what you must understand is this...
your answers will be answerd and at the same time the answers will open up three more questions, and the questions answers will will each produce more questions of wich YOU WILL FIND THE ANSWERS YOU ARE LOOKING FOR...
its a long journy, and i can tell you are determined to BECOME WHAT YOU WANT TO BE... and the secret technique...???
sit back, relax... and take a few moments to understand that you have the ability to do anything you want to do, we all do, this is deep within ourselfs, and it is that one belief that make people become successfull in what they want to do, they BELIEVE they have a brain, they beilieve they can learn the skills they need in order to accomplish something great...
you must HAVE PATIENCE in your success, it wont happen tomorrow, it will happen slowly, and as it does, you will start to notice changes, and they will excite you as you realise you are becoming successfull..
your starting of at a point in your life where most people have been... yes your starting... your sitting there, in your chair and your reading these posts from great people...
i know that you feel better for reding this... you are looking for answers, answers you were unable to find yourself...and here they are, vague they may seem, none the less your answers are here...
kk2004, what you must understand is this...
your answers will be answerd and at the same time the answers will open up three more questions, and the questions answers will will each produce more questions of wich YOU WILL FIND THE ANSWERS YOU ARE LOOKING FOR...
its a long journy, and i can tell you are determined to BECOME WHAT YOU WANT TO BE... and the secret technique...???
sit back, relax... and take a few moments to understand that you have the ability to do anything you want to do, we all do, this is deep within ourselfs, and it is that one belief that make people become successfull in what they want to do, they BELIEVE they have a brain, they beilieve they can learn the skills they need in order to accomplish something great...
you must HAVE PATIENCE in your success, it wont happen tomorrow, it will happen slowly, and as it does, you will start to notice changes, and they will excite you as you realise you are becoming successfull..
DJHoolahoop
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 4, 2005
- Messages
- 385
- Reaction score
- 2
My story so far
you asked for help
and i'd be glad to share my wisdom.
I'm not that much further into the game, but because I'm already in the midst of it, I feel like I can at least offer what success I've had so far.
The first thing I wanted to ask you was about your gf. How long have you two been seeing each other, who asked who out and how IS she around you? Is she surprisingly interested in you and you don't know why?
The important thing about that is that girls have a good way of seeing past people simply by the cues that they give them. Some girls want to help change a guy into who he IS on the inside as opposed to who he's being on the outside. Sometimes they're able to believe in us more than we ever could.
I could be wrong with all of this, but if it in some way strikes a chord with you then I'll be sure to tell you the next part.
One thing is energy and willingness to succeed at getting to be where you want in life. That means that you will NOT listen to yourself anymore because simply put you have been causing your own failure. Sound wrong? Sound like it doesn't make sense? Why would we do that to ourselves? Simpy because it's what we've known as our reality our whole lives. All we know is what it COULD be like, the rest is just a fantasy.
First thing I would recommend doing is writing down a list of things you want to accomplish. Goals of who you want to be. Create a list that molds the individual you are striving to become. Then USE THAT to propel WHY you want to get out of your situation. Eventually you want your shift to go from "how am i going to do this?" to actually just trying and learning. This is so key.
Being hard on oneself is easier than actually doing and that is something that I STILL have a hard time with. BUT now there's some things that are critically different.
Those things include:
--------------------------
Knowing my self-worth. Knowing my talents, my likes, my dislikes, my hobies, my skills, my desires and the extent of what I can do with myself and thenactually doing those things.
I've worked on all those things mentioned above because they help you to stay interesting and busy. A girl will enjoy being in the pressence of a man that does a lot with himself.
I have FINALLY and I mean FINALLY started accepting myself, loving myself and being the ONE person I can count on. Sound silly? It's GOLD when you REALLY see the world for how it is. That isn't to scare you, but it's true that eventually you'll start picking up on what the world is about and what seperates you.
Eventually in the end all it really means is that you have it all within you, but you've been holding back because of either the present reality you're stuck in or because of the fear of having to try and fail before you learn.
One last thing you have to remember man. That it's YOUR LIFE, YOU are the ONLY one who's going to do ANYTHING for yourself. You are the only one that's TRULY going to care whether or not you succeed. You can practically tell your best friend that you're going to be touring across canada as a rockstar and they'll STILL look at you the same. It doesn't truly matter what they think, that's something that's VERY critical. Because when you finally remove that barrier, a LOT opens up. When you truly live your life the way YOU want to and stop with the focus of everyone else, that you'll be all that and more. AND understand the world for who you have to be and why it's important that you be a certain way. Far too many people in one way or another try to fit into societies view or their friends view of who they should be, instead of being themselves.
Most importantly, believe in yourself. Believe you will succeed, believe you will become the greatest you can be. If you have a girl that already sees that in you, then perhaps that's all you needed to hear to understand what she sees in you.
Take it easy,
DJ Hoola Hoop
you asked for help
and i'd be glad to share my wisdom.I'm not that much further into the game, but because I'm already in the midst of it, I feel like I can at least offer what success I've had so far.
The first thing I wanted to ask you was about your gf. How long have you two been seeing each other, who asked who out and how IS she around you? Is she surprisingly interested in you and you don't know why?
The important thing about that is that girls have a good way of seeing past people simply by the cues that they give them. Some girls want to help change a guy into who he IS on the inside as opposed to who he's being on the outside. Sometimes they're able to believe in us more than we ever could.
I could be wrong with all of this, but if it in some way strikes a chord with you then I'll be sure to tell you the next part.
One thing is energy and willingness to succeed at getting to be where you want in life. That means that you will NOT listen to yourself anymore because simply put you have been causing your own failure. Sound wrong? Sound like it doesn't make sense? Why would we do that to ourselves? Simpy because it's what we've known as our reality our whole lives. All we know is what it COULD be like, the rest is just a fantasy.
First thing I would recommend doing is writing down a list of things you want to accomplish. Goals of who you want to be. Create a list that molds the individual you are striving to become. Then USE THAT to propel WHY you want to get out of your situation. Eventually you want your shift to go from "how am i going to do this?" to actually just trying and learning. This is so key.
Being hard on oneself is easier than actually doing and that is something that I STILL have a hard time with. BUT now there's some things that are critically different.
Those things include:
--------------------------
Knowing my self-worth. Knowing my talents, my likes, my dislikes, my hobies, my skills, my desires and the extent of what I can do with myself and thenactually doing those things.
I've worked on all those things mentioned above because they help you to stay interesting and busy. A girl will enjoy being in the pressence of a man that does a lot with himself.
I have FINALLY and I mean FINALLY started accepting myself, loving myself and being the ONE person I can count on. Sound silly? It's GOLD when you REALLY see the world for how it is. That isn't to scare you, but it's true that eventually you'll start picking up on what the world is about and what seperates you.
Eventually in the end all it really means is that you have it all within you, but you've been holding back because of either the present reality you're stuck in or because of the fear of having to try and fail before you learn.
One last thing you have to remember man. That it's YOUR LIFE, YOU are the ONLY one who's going to do ANYTHING for yourself. You are the only one that's TRULY going to care whether or not you succeed. You can practically tell your best friend that you're going to be touring across canada as a rockstar and they'll STILL look at you the same. It doesn't truly matter what they think, that's something that's VERY critical. Because when you finally remove that barrier, a LOT opens up. When you truly live your life the way YOU want to and stop with the focus of everyone else, that you'll be all that and more. AND understand the world for who you have to be and why it's important that you be a certain way. Far too many people in one way or another try to fit into societies view or their friends view of who they should be, instead of being themselves.
Most importantly, believe in yourself. Believe you will succeed, believe you will become the greatest you can be. If you have a girl that already sees that in you, then perhaps that's all you needed to hear to understand what she sees in you.
Take it easy,
DJ Hoola Hoop
Theres your problem.
Lose that mentality.
Even if its false, even if its temporary or fleeting or spasmodic, replace that mentality with "I am anything but a reg joe. Everyone ELSE is regular, they may be, but I am not."
Develop this, even if its arrogance at first, an arrogance that needs to mellow.