I am happier and do better when I am away from this site.

[jakethasnake]

Is it just me, or are you actually more productive in love AND in life when you're away from sosuave?


I swear to god, this site has become a curse in its own weird way. When I'm here I read all these questions and neuroses of newbs or just insecure guys, and I really think that it rubs off on me. I keep comparing other dudes' situations to mine, and start analysing it to death, then start freezing up when I call or talk to a girl, coz I'm basically thinking to damn much.


I STRONGLY advise many of you guys to just QUIT this stupid site. After you've read and internalized the material on this site, it is of NO USE WHATSOEVER. Now I know that. There is such a thing as information overload, you know. As long as you remember the key points of DETATCHMENT, MYSTERY, and COMPOSURE you will be just fine. Add a healthy dose of humor and personality to that, and you're golden. All these tactics, plans, "advising", and posturing is for SHYT. I have posted here MUCH TOO MUCH, more than I'd care to admit. I plan to cut that crap out, and live my life on the real, in 3-D, in the flesh.


I've had stretches where I just got off my computer and put myself out there, and I had a GREAT time with life in general, while simultaneously watching my love life improve 200%. Other times, I made the mistake of coming back here to "brush up", then getting caught up in thread after thread after page after page of UTTERLY USELESS ego-massaging, BS-posturing, and generally time wasting crap.


I tend to think a lot, and my being sedentary and thinking about all the ideas on this site (99% of which are pure shyte and useless) made my game and my LIFE falter. This site is a blessing in disguise... it has sharp jagged edges that can harm, so watch out!


So to anyone that's an intermediate DJ and above... just cut this crap out and get out there! Don't come back to "brush up on skillz" or to "ask for advice" -- be a man and TRUST YOUR GUT. Your gut is your friend, and that voice inside your head is your mortal enemy. Silence the swine, and trust your best friend, YOUR GUT. Try your best to participate as little as possible on this site - it really can harm your life (like the internet in general).

 

[Runna13=)]

I agree with you. I just come back to help the rookies out.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

I don't think this site is a curse, but I definitely think its not healthy to constantly post your "situations" on here as it makes you analyze things to death. Furthermore there is a shiat load of bad advice coming from supposed "DJ's" on this board and someone who analyze's a lot can completely fuvk up a good thing with a great girl by listening to the wrong advice.

I agree that you should be confident and apply the general principles you've learnd and you'll do awesome with girls. Getting to involved on exact lines, what to say, how to say and when to say it will absolutely mind fuvk you 9x outta 10.



PIMP

 

[IrReSiStIbLe]

Jake, I couldnt agree more!! Note: I havnt been on this site for a week and I got laid during that week.. whereas whilst lurking and posting on this site for the last 2 months I was struggling like hell... As entropy, our man said, some of those ego boosted d1ckheads are turning this site into pure poison... and as jakethesnake said- just believe in urself and follow your instincts.. remember- confidence, and being serious with a touch of humour is the key. You'll be surprised how believing in urself will help you...
So long, my friends..
Irre.

 

[Ricky]

I guess it's whatever you focus on.

I've found the tips section to be the most helpful. It's rare that I post on the regular board, but sometimes I like to do it to get feedback.

 

[squirrels]

Sometimes being on this site causes the less strong-willed of us to start to NEED to chase women to be accepted by the other DJs. We start becoming afraid that if we aren't all banging 3 or 4 women, then we don't belong here.

So WHAT if we don't belong here? What matters is what you want to do with your 80-100 years. F**k what the SoSuavers think.

You have to be here because you WANT to be, otherwise being here is no better than being AFC.

 

[killerasp]

i also agree with you jake.

after i read the bible and many post in the tips section..it was time that i take it into the real world. You can only read so much without actually trying what you read in real life. Once you do it in real life, you realize what you read is somewhat true and time just flies past you.

Ive had much sucess in the past months when i was away from site. i started to hang out with real DJ's from the boards, learning as much as i could from them.

 

[Julian]

I agree. ive been away for awhile and found it allowed me to "breathe".

****, staying away from the computer altogether is a good idea.

 

[Omega]

I like to help people, but as you've probebly noticed I never post any situations myself, because I live life as it is and don't look for relationship advice, unless its an LTR. I want to learn this stuff for myself, not have myself having my girl have a great relationship with my advisor through me.

 

[becker]

The main thing about this site is to give you different perspectives. If you feel comfortable with seeing things mainly from your own point of view, then you don't need to come here for help. Also, I come here to check out the interesting situations that people get themselves into. It's sort of like watching TV. I don't necessarily follow every bit of advice here. In fact, I'm one of those frequent rule-breakers around here, remember?

 

[aBAzLLnA]

See, you can look at it in a religious way. When one devotes his life to a religion, and lives solely by its commandments and rules, he is confined. So when he steps out of the rules, and lives away from that religion and starts to accept other aspects of life, he feels free.

This applies to the bible. You try to know all this crap in it and when the time comes, you apply and apply. You base yourself on a "DJ" system and all the rules and crap confine you. But when you step out of that, its liberating....ive been there done that.

~ivan

 

[CLOONEY]

I went through this stage also. But you just gotta not read all the crap here. I just drop by for about 30 minutes every couple of days to help out some of the newbs, give them quick advise straight to the point, and run. No point argueing and posting thousands of posts every single year.

You also just gotta get to the point where your comfortable with yourself, you might say you are, but you really do have many insecurities you cant see at the moment. Once you are happy with yourself then all of this crap people post wont effect you. You can stop overanalysing things and just live your life.

Take it easy

 

[jakethasnake]

I kind of agree with you Clooney. I do have some personal insecurities, but it's nothing that a little action and less thinking can't fix.

But if you're refering to my debates on race and politics - why should my strong sense of justice be construed as an insecurity? Is it a crime or a character defect to voice my objections to the stereotyping or objectification of race that happens everyday in America? It's some ignorant dumbfvck shyt, and I'm not gonna just sit down and pretend it's okay, you know.

 

[iqqi]

i come because i like some of you cats. i like to hear what's up with you.

and i like the interesting conversations/discussions that take place sometimes. the perspectives can be intriguing.

and i like jake

i'd be sad if you left forever.

 

[Player_Supreme]

So Jake, does this mean that your not coming up in here anymore?

Does this mean that your going to cut down?

Exactly what are you saying here? And if you know the source of your troubles then why keep going back to the ailment?

 

[T Dog]

I don't think that Sosuave is a curse. What you are experiencing is the higher end of the learning curve. SS is at the base of that learning curve and as you learn and understand the material here you gain confidence and lose the relevance to the posts and the posters.

Also, every minute you are not stuck on the web (reading Sosuave or anthing else) is a minute you can be out in the real world meeeting people (and chicks).

T Dog

 

[slipstreamer83]

Sometimes I think I overdo it with all the theory, but I think that to get to the point in which you are, jakethasnake, first you have to overdo!!!

I think that if you see that in the real world you get what you want, that´s it. You can come and help the new guys if you want, but if you have in real life what you want, then there´s nothing more to pursue in being a DJ!!!

I know that I overdo sometimes reading all the theory, and I have not practised much (and I have screwed up the majority of the times... but I´m just starting!!), but I hope that one day this will be over, and I won´t have to worry about getting women anymore.

Whatever you decide to do, stay here or not to stay here, have good luck!!

 

[jbbrain]

jake..i posted something similar to this, but in a different context.

Check it out:

http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=41277


What I find really ironic is taht this site teaches people over and over again to be your own man, not to make women the center of your life etc while many guys on this forum SPEND ALL THEIR TIME on this forum and thus, are ALWAYS thinking about girls. This site is encouraging what it seeks to destroy.

Man, even me, I find I'm coming here more often than I should. Maybe itll be a new years resolution to spend less on the internet and Sosuave. Ive been here long enough. Sometimes Im confronted with a situation that requires me to ask advice from the other posters, but more often than not, their advice, even though they think its helpful, is just a bunch of utter bullshyt.

And sometimes giving advice to these utterly helpless "souls" is just plain depressing. It's sad to see "men" as clueless and helpless as they are when they first come to this place.

Anyways..I don't know really what I'll do. But I definitely find myself thinking/obsessing over girls when I'm on this site when I should be out doing other cooler things with my time. I don't think it's healthy.

 

[Ricky]

This is actually what happened to me last summer (2002). I was on here all the time, when I should have been out picking up more.

I still managed to do well meeting women, but reading this all the time does cut into your free time.

I've posted more the last couple of weeks, because for the most part throughout this year, summer and fall both, I was on here very rarely. I may have read a few things and posted.

I still kind of desire learning new things, so I've been tempted to buy some of the products like Doc Love and David Deangelo, but have held off.

 

[squirrels]

I find myself here a lot because I work an often-slow IT job and end up having a lot of free time and only an Internet connection to help pass it.

I DO allow the stuff on this site to become TOO pervasive in my mindset when I speak to women...I get that little "DJ voice" inside my head saying stuff like, "Too much kino! Not enough kino! Hold eye contact! Smile! No! Not like that! Be a man! Ask her questions! Say something! Obey your instincts! Be careful! NO don't hesistate!"

Shut that voice up...you've read this crap enough. You know what you're doing. DJing is not about some message board. It's one social stigma to replace another less effective one, but you won't see true results until you don't NEED the stigma any more and talking to women just becomes something you do, instead of "DJing."