RedScorpion said:
Yup, sounds like it went well. I think it's not a bad thing you didn't get her number - this is all about establishing the familiarity between you two. Not doing the muscle grab is fine too. You two have known each other for years - and have not talked for a long time either. It would have shown a prepared amount of comfort with her on this 'accidental' meeting. She was in the feeling out stage, which is what you did too, in a comfortable, confident way. If you were grabbing her, then it would say 'This guy hasn't seen me in forever, and we didn't end well - but he's comfortable enough already to grab me?'. So to me, you did the right thing. You can escalate later.
I would wait until you bump into her again sometime on campus. She knows you're there, and her curiousity is stirred. Don't make it seem like a deliberate bump in, please. That just speaks bounds about your established interest in her. To you, you have an 'active' relationship with her. To her, she's rekindling it right now. You're at a 50 in your mind while she's 10. Imagine a random cute girl deliberately waiting for you outside class. Sure you'd like it, talk pleasant, but you'd still frown at 'why was she waiting for me? That's weird'. I'm also glad you didn't get into her looking sick. It was fine, just good you didn't dig deeper.
So take your time a bit. Be cautious too in your approach (as in not appearing eager), let her earn your invitation of outing with pleasant talk. You'll do fine. Just play it from the ground up, and not at the level your mind is all prepped for already.
Edit: Ah I see, last day is monday. Sure, run into her, if you can make it seem innocuous enough. Casual exchange of numbers, hang out sometime.
I love your posts bro, it's like you can read my mind.
On one hand, I wanted to hit myself for not asking or doing kino on her.
But on the other hand, I thought to myself that I did the right thing. Why? Because for one, like you said (my mind basically), we ran into each other on a regular basis for the past 5 years, and now that we talked for 6minutes, me asking or kinoing her would have been "toooo fast".
"OmG, we talk after 5 years for the first time, and he's already trying to feel me physically and get my number? I bet he does this with every girl."
We have to remember, girls have a mindset to not appear to "easy". Yeah, club girls would give their number easily, but guess what, they are what the name implies, CLUB GIRLS, slvts. EASY to bag. They'd kiss a random stranger within 2 minutes of knowing them.
This woman, doesn't club. No bars. She doesn't flirt around. She is the loyal type, and the fact she constantly cuts off bad male friends is more or less proof.
The last thing I want is her to think "oh God, he's just another one of those guys who ask for the number and want to feel up in the first few minutes of talking". And here it would be worse, since we have established history, and aren't "strangers" to each other per se. (We know each other's names, friends, etc).
As for not making it obvious I was waiting for her, good advice too. I figured it would show I am interested in her, but like you said, it would off come "TOO STRONG, TOO FAST".
Afterall, we do live only 10 minutes from each other, and we run into each so occasionally, I should have no worry of not running into her off campus again, considering the fact for the past FIVE YEARS we have run into each other outside, during parties/events, and food places.
By the way, if I don't run into her on Monday; campus run-ins are over until next semester as Monday is the last day for college for me. After that, it's all outside game; near our homes etc, Baskin Robbins that we both frequent so much that our friends have labeled it our second homes for us. (The BR is about 5 minutes walk from both of our homes).
The way I see it as: I didn't come off as desperate by not asking her for the number or touching her. It showed that I was confident enough knowing the two of us just started talking and that we have so many opportunities ahead of us.
She using the bathroom twice within 10 minutes also indicates to me that I got her spinning on the "you look sick" comment. "Oh my God, is he saying I look bad? What if I am looking bad? I must get to a bathroom asap". I made sure to cut off the sick look topic because I wanted to 1) leave it as a neg and 2) Not let it become "bad" . Just leave her thinking, and if I am not wrong, it worked; got her checking herself out again despite being approached by me after using the ladies restroom (which was to check herself out obviously, since she got in and out within 1 minute).
I left before she even entered the restroom the second time. So I didn't wait around for her to come out even though she said something as I walked away, I have no idea what she said lol. If she expected me to wait for her, that also works in my favor because she would have came out to see me gone which shows higher status too (I mean, waiting for a girl you just started talking to? Yeah no)
Kailex said:
If you do actually get to ask her out, let us know if the reality matches the expectation.
When I was in college many springs ago, I had a girl who I absolutely adored for well over 2 years. I didn't have the balls to ask her out because she always had guys hovering... until we took a class together and we had do a project together. FINALLY.
We started going out, and about 2 months into it... she was definitely not the person I had pedestalized her to be. But I never regret having tried though. I did set her up for impossible odds unfortunately, and Reality-Her never stood a chance against Dream-Her.
Best of luck.
I will definitely keep you all updated. So far, I am loving her. The way she sounds, the way she looks at me and gives me this certain look, it's really appealing and I really enjoyed the 6 minutes I spent with her. I think the biggest thing here is that "MeHer" have this long time history which started in 2005 and went cold until 2009 but then it came back and hit me so hard in 2009 that I, admittingly, put her on such a pedestal.
Notice how I didn't stop other things in my life. I am extremely happy with my successes. I make tons of money; I drive a beautiful BMW 525i 2012. I have friends, nearly two bachelors, etc. The point is, no matter how much I love her, I am keeping my life in tact. So it can't be all that bad, can it?
