I am afraid of rejection

[Yoko Kurama]

What is the first thing I should do to fix this?

 

[Warrior74]

Go get rejected asap.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

You're not really afraid of rejection. Rejection is quick and though may be a temporary sting to the ego, it's over quick and you hopefully move on and learn from it. You need to keep going on till rejections don't bother you anymore. Each rejection is a step in the direction to a YES. But you need to really sit down and face what we all are really afraid of. ACCEPTANCE. Because then you get to see the person you've built up as a fantasy "perfect" person in your mind for who they reall are and have to think about future meetings with them, how to act, meeting their friends, them meeting yours, parents down the line, things to say, commonalities, differences, and the fact things may not work out. So rejection is easy...Acceptance is a whole other story. Just keep working on yourself and be honest with your shortcomings and work on them. Good luck!

 

[moneyisking]

love yourself

 

[I'm in the Mood]

What is the first thing I should do to fix this?

In order to help you the best we can, we'll need a little more information than that.

Describe a specific situation where you felt this fear of rejection, and how you acted because of it. What kind of a person are you when you're not afraid of rejection?

 

[lakeshore]

The older i get the more i begin to accept that people
are not put on this earth to serve you. I would expect someone
to be nice and cordial but not to fall in love with me or become my
best friend just because I put myself out there for the offer.

I think the better mindset would be to expect rejection in some form,
be nice and not an a-hole, and if a deeper relationship develops with
a girl or just a friend then you can be happy about that.

I think with this attitude the fear gets reduced and in some perverse way you'll develop
more relationships.

Its all about expectations really, your visions are probably too grand when you think about a girl.

Temper your expectations dramatically and things will flow smoother. Not saying don't be into her or whatever but
just don't EXPECT to see fireworks every time and you'll be more natural. I think back to the last girl i hooked up with.
I really did want her and was doing a nice job of being interesting and funny and what not but when we actually
'did it' I was completely not expecting it. Had I gone out that night hoping or expecting to bang her I gaurantee
it wouldn't have happened because my behavior would have been different. I was pleasantly surprised.

 

[Yoko Kurama]

I'll you give more info tonight, I'm on my way to Fort Leonardwood

 

[teddy240]

why? "The only people who never fail, are those who never try."

 

[Yoko Kurama]

The older i get the more i begin to accept that people
are not put on this earth to serve you. I would expect someone
to be nice and cordial but not to fall in love with me or become my
best friend just because I put myself out there for the offer.

I think the better mindset would be to expect rejection in some form,
be nice and not an a-hole, and if a deeper relationship develops with
a girl or just a friend then you can be happy about that.

I think with this attitude the fear gets reduced and in some perverse way you'll develop
more relationships.

Its all about expectations really, your visions are probably too grand when you think about a girl.

Temper your expectations dramatically and things will flow smoother. Not saying don't be into her or whatever but
just don't EXPECT to see fireworks every time and you'll be more natural. I think back to the last girl i hooked up with.
I really did want her and was doing a nice job of being interesting and funny and what not but when we actually
'did it' I was completely not expecting it. Had I gone out that night hoping or expecting to bang her I gaurantee
it wouldn't have happened because my behavior would have been different. I was pleasantly surprised.

Best. Advice. Ever.

 

[synergy1]

take yourself less seriously. laugh it off.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Accepting Rejection

 

[Bling]

Accepting Rejection

You're suppose to end your post with "shameless plug"

 

[ProDJ26]

Somewhere in the world there are men who are locked up. They are saying to themselves "When I get out I'm gonna do this, gonna do that, gonna talk to her, etc. Somewhere in the world someone is laying up sick in a hospital thinking or saying, "if only I was healthy I'd do this/that". Somewhere in the world an old man is saying "IF I HAD ONLY TAKEN SOME CHANCES IN MY LIFE"

Don't be those guys, be the one that gets rejected.