I actually initiated conversation with a cutie at my gym today

bigdave17

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Me and her were both working legs hard as hell and were both exhausted (doing leg press next to each other - we were both going super heavy). I looked at her and smiled and said "damn leg day is brutal, isn't it?" and she goes "oh yea it's just terrible", and I said "yea especially when you try to go heavy", she nodded in agreement.

My anxiety kicked in hard though and I cut it off before it went any further. The fukked up thing is that I was probably exactly her type. She was maybe 25, 5'4, either middle eastern or spanish (which is exactly how I look), kinda thicker body, dark features.

It really is true that fear/anxiety is the biggest thing that kills us in dating. I wish I could convince myself that women want to meet someone as badly as I do and that most of them will be very receptive to me once I get a little conversation rolling
 

mrgoodstuff

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Dude your WAYYY into them . They need to be into you. Your personality will be better when you don't judge so biased for appearance.
 

Spidah

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Lose the scarcity mentality.

Once you do that, all anxiety around bitches will vanish.
 

Mike32ct

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Can he lose that anxiety by having a reliable "starter h0e" that he can fvck when he wants
Absolutely. Starter ho is great classic advice.

But, at a bare minimum, if he doesn’t want to hook up with somebody outside of a relationship, maybe at least have some social circle hotties to go clubbing/dancing, etc. with. Friendzone is ok in that instance.

I have an HB8 friend that I go to dances with sometime. While we’ve never hooked up, it was a confidence booster that definitely paid off and allowed me to easily get a HB6 Re-Starter h o.

(I have no specific advice on “gym game.” That’s not my area at all.)
 

Tilex

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Damn girl you have nice calves! Have you been working out a lot?
or
Can you flex those calves? I wanna know if hard work really pays off!


Most of the time people have headphones in their ears.
If you spot a chick without one it means she's open to communication.
 
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sph21

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You were way too serious, man. You need to learn how to be playful & fun around girls.

One other thing, you need to develop your charm. A charismatic man can make anyone attracted to him by how he smile, talk or act. It needs practice. This is why I keep telling you guys to practice talking to any stranger. Yes, you will feel so anxious at first. But you will feel better as you keep practicing at it. You need to build a momentum. It will get easier next time.
 

ohrein

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Good first step! Now just keep doing it when the opportunities arise. Over time try to make the conversation a bit more fun, try to make her laugh. Then keep your eyes out for interest and go for the number close. Don't worry that you freaked out at the end, just keep doing it. You defeat fear with slow exposure over time.
 

Chev.Chelios

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k well it's awesome your getting excited over small progress, that's good. every little win you get you should be fvcking excited, man.

you said a couple words to the girl your attracted to and then your mind quickly blanked out right afterwards, just means your stifled and not warmed up into a social mood.

start opening everybody around you more often, people you're not even interested in, just for the sake of it..

usually you'll feel MASSIVE resistence talking to people you can give 2 chits about, that's bad..

you'll notice when you start getting in moods where you actually enjoy talking to anybody..
the key word here is genuine "engagment" just for the sake of being outgoing and self amusing, then opening attractive woman becomes completely effortless.
 

Murk

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Well done, you're talking to hot chicks that are your type. Just keep doing this every chance you get and naturally you'll become bolder with each interaction.
 

MrWood

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it could be a good move he froze... shes wondering why he didnt hit on her if he didnt come off as AFC/ORBITS
next meeting he needs to strike with obvious flirt/game and ask out
 

Roober

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Good job Dave! Now keep it up every day. Start with small talk like that and you will notice it will turn into conversations. Just keep doing it! It takes practice!
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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Bro I give no ****s and can talk to anyone and anything if I really wanted to. These bitches in the gym aren’t looking for people to talk to. Especially if there super hot. Like it’s just a thing where they only go for attention really. You can see it by the look on their face and the way they walk. It’s like going up to people and telling them ‘hey I am ignoring you, okay?’ Like what? Lol
 

mrgoodstuff

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Bro I give no ****s and can talk to anyone and anything if I really wanted to. These bitches in the gym aren’t looking for people to talk to. Especially if there super hot. Like it’s just a thing where they only go for attention really. You can see it by the look on their face and the way they walk. It’s like going up to people and telling them ‘hey I am ignoring you, okay?’ Like what? Lol
Your smart. I did say if he wants to socialize at the gym yoga and some of the classes give an opportunity to do that.
 
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