How to tell if she's not interested, or just a horrible texter?

[RememberMoi]

Hey forum,

Below I'll be providing chat logs that I recently had with girls from the app Tinder. I'm so lost at what is going on... I can't tell if these girls are simply horrible texters, not interested, or if I didn't do enough on my end. This is just one of the many I have experienced. If you guys want more chat logs I will provide them.

Tinder Girl #1

Me:Are you matching with me without saying hi?
HB: Hi Lol I've had exams lol to busy for tinder but i'm done now
Me: I guessss i'll forgive you I'm still in exam mode. What's it like begin in heaven? And by heaven I mean being finished with exams
HB:Aww! And amazing! Aha except my last exam was brtual - what school do you go to??
Me:I bet I can gett what university and program you're in. I've at at [insert school name]
HB:Aha where do you think I go?!! and cool I know a lot of people who go there
Me: Hmm i'll have to go with Ryerson. To guess your program I have to know more about you.
HB: Aha your right! So your an aspiring writer and a psychic
Me: I'm also a superhero at night. Whether you believe it or not I can read you like a book I know everything about you
HB: Woah woah woah.... This is getting creepy. Except your superhero comment was cute
Me: It isn't creepy! Give me a chance to tell you what I know
HB: Okay chance granted
Me: You're a stay at home mom with 8 kids, and you favour your daughter Suckdeep amongst the rest. You are also having a love affair with Nutella.
HB: Ahh one of those is right
Me: You gotta stop having kids Christina
HB: I know
Me: I was hoping my psychic senses were wrong... Guess not. Things arent going to work out between us. Its you, not me.
HB: Okay
Me: So tell me about yourself
HB: I thought it wasn't going to work
Me: You're cute so I'm willing to look past your 8 kids and get to know you better
HB: Ahah I think that was a compliment why dont you tell me something about yourself
Me: How about we play the random question game. First question, did you drink egg so far this Christmas holiday?
HB: Allergic hbu?
Me: Are you allergic to eggs? And nope I haven't but it's like my favorite drink
HB: Milk - they do sell a milk free one though

This is the part of the conversation that makes absolutely no sense to me. I'm skipping through some of our texts.

HB: What's one of your favourite things to do in your spare time?
Me: If i'm lazy i'll lay down and listen to music. If I want to be productive i'll continue some of my writing projects, produce music, or simply read
HB: Thats cool

From this point on unless she was talking about herself, she never returned any questions or played along with any of my role-plays and jokes. Our conversation ended with her saying "Aha " and me saying "Yea lol"

 

[J Roc]

too much idle chatter. are you trying to be her text buddy?

 

[RememberMoi]

too much idle chatter. are you trying to be her text buddy?

Trying to get to know her better and get her number.

 

[Rave18]

One sign of no interest http://youtu.be/-tLmqXEGnrc

 

[Dhoulmagus]

Girls arent horrible texters to channing teytum.

 

[RememberMoi]

Jesus. I don't text my best friends this much.

You should have sealed the deal way earlier.

Like here.



If this was some girl you'd met at a party or a club then maybe you could afford to be a bit less direct.

Since you would have had time to get her more invested.

But at the moment you're just some random pixels on a screen with nothing to differentiate you from the legions of other guys on tinder.

Strike while the iron is hot.

I want to build more comfort and get something started before I quickly jump to meeting them. This is Tinder and I'm only 19, I don't think most girls are comfortable to that whole idea.

I'm confused when they can't text me properly nor carry on the conversation

 

[TheGambino]

I want to build more comfort and get something started before I quickly jump to meeting them. This is Tinder and I'm only 19, I don't think most girls are comfortable to that whole idea.

I'm confused when they can't text me properly nor carry on the conversation

Dont build comfort on texting take that huge tip as an lesson

 

[pdx1138]

Dont build comfort on texting take that huge tip as an lesson

Seconded.

You "Build Comfort" in person. They might say something about you making them "feel safe" then you're in.

Remember that women respond to assertion.

You're not appearing to be a man of action here.

 

[Maximus Rex]

What's a "good texter," as opposed to a "bad texter?"

 

[RememberMoi]

What's a "good texter," as opposed to a "bad texter?"

I'm 19 and compared to the older generations, which I'm sure most of you are it means holding a conversation by playing along with jokes and asking questions. There are a good handful of girls I meet and can have paragraph conversations filled with opinion, laughter, and flirting. Even if they aren't long they still actually say more than a few words.

On the other hand, there is the exact opposite. Though they will show interest, there texts completely suck. And if i'm doing online dating it's hard to stay motivated with simple responses sent back to me.

 

[LorenzoVonM]

You want to know how she is interested? You ask for her number, set up a date and if she shows up she is interested. You don't need all that texting. What do you care if she's a bad texter? You're using that see if she is interested? Cut to the chase and find out the easy way. Your girl was playing along at first and then got bored with all the questions that lead to nowheresville. Meanwhile, the other 40 dudes she matched with on Tinder were asking for her number or getting to the point.

 

[Maximus Rex]

You Sir, Have No Life

I'm 19 and compared to the older generations, which I'm sure most of you are it means holding a conversation by playing along with jokes and asking questions. There are a good handful of girls I meet and can have paragraph conversations filled with opinion, laughter, and flirting. Even if they aren't long they still actually say more than a few words.

1) Why in the f*ck are you having text marathons with chicks?

2) This seems like wishful thinking on your part. Opinion, laughter, and flirting, are things that are left up to the interpretation of the reader. Sh*t said in text is as meaningful as the Iranians they're not pursing a nuclear program. The only thing worse than loitering around chicks is having marathon text marathons with hoes. While you're texting as Judge Nismo would say "your princess in another castle," having the limits of her gag reflex tested and taking sloppy facials.

 

[RememberMoi]

1) Why in the f*ck are you having text marathons with chicks?

2) This seems like wishful thinking on your part. Opinion, laughter, and flirting, are things that are left up to the interpretation of the reader. Sh*t said in text is as meaningful as the Iranians they're not pursing a nuclear program. The only thing worse than loitering around chicks is having marathon text marathons with hoes. While you're texting as Judge Nismo would say "your princess in another castle," having the limits of her gag reflex tested and taking sloppy facials.

So you're telling me you get a girls number, or meet them online. Exchange a few texts back and forth then ask them out? What if her responses show little interest, or little investment. That's not rational.

You want that security that A) She's interested and B) She's interesting -- especially if you're looking for a relationship

 

[Maximus Rex]

No Texting For Rex

So you're telling me you get a girls number, or meet them online. Exchange a few texts back and forth then ask them out? What if her responses show little interest, or little investment. That's not rational.

You want that security that A) She's interested and B) She's interesting -- especially if you're looking for a relationship

Rex doesn't text hoes. Texting should only be used to work out the logistical issues concerning a date, for example.

Jennifer Lawrence: Rex, Honey, today's shoot is running long. They're having a hella time trying to get these camera angles set up. So I'm going to be late.

Rex: Cool, let me know when you're going to be on your way.


Scarlett Johannson: Rex, is that bar on we're meeting at on W. 14th or E.14 Street.

Rex: It's on the Westside.

Rex only deals with chicks in real life and he doesn't even ask for the number, namely because numbers are meaningless. If I'm hollering at a chick, instead of doing the traditional number exchange and assuming that I'm going to be the only the that going to holla at this chick during the week. Rex strikes while the iron is hot. I'll ask her out right, then, and there. If she accepts, I'll take her to Cold Stone, Subways, or for a drink. If she's willing to accompany me, (a complete stranger,) to another venue, not only will it solidify future dates, it's a major IoI or you can do what PrettyBoyAJ does and give the chick your number, putting the onus on her to contact you.

What you're saying isn't rationale, trying to gauge a chick's interest level via a series of binary code symbols.

 

[bukowski_merit]

If you're going to do text game for more than logistics - you better be a lot more interesting than you are.

HB: Hi Lol I've had exams lol to busy for tinder but i'm done now
Me: I guessss i'll forgive you I'm still in exam mode. What's it like begin in heaven? And by heaven I mean being finished with exams

****y and funny don't work well through text unless she's VERY interested. "I guess I'll forgive you" is assuming rapport is there; it's assuming she cares. But, she has no value placed on you yet.

Instead of doing this act - you should focus on flirting with her... Instead you're either having this basic convo with her or acting like you're the prize.

HB:Aww! And amazing! Aha except my last exam was brtual - what school do you go to??
Me:I bet I can gett what university and program you're in. I've at at [insert school name]

What is your goal here? Figure out what it is and LEAD the conversation into the direction of your goal. If she doesn't play along with your goal - dump the conversation or pitch the meet.

For me: My initial conversations with a woman are to figure out if she can keep up, both mentally and sexually. So I flirt and bring sexual innuendos into the conversation. If she doesn't get it or doesn't play along - it's on to the next one.

You don't have to take it to this extreme, but this basic banter is not going to get you anywhere through text. You're much better off just trying to come up a date asap if this is what you're going to do.

HB: Aha your right! So your an aspiring writer and a psychic
Me: I'm also a superhero at night. Whether you believe it or not I can read you like a book I know everything about you
HB: Woah woah woah.... This is getting creepy. Except your superhero comment was cute

You really like pushing the "I'm the man" envelope, don't you?

You're not really getting anywhere with this because you don't have a clear direction. Everything you say should have a purpose. And trying to self-value yourself is a weak purpose.

Me: It isn't creepy! Give me a chance to tell you what I know
HB: Okay chance granted

Who's chasing who now? Who's qualifying themselves! Yes yes.... All that chest pumping reversed in 3 words and 2 emoticons!

Me: You're a stay at home mom with 8 kids, and you favour your daughter Suckdeep amongst the rest. You are also having a love affair with Nutella.
HB: Ahh one of those is right
Me: You gotta stop having kids Christina
HB: I know
Me: I was hoping my psychic senses were wrong... Guess not. Things arent going to work out between us. Its you, not me.
HB: Okay
Me: So tell me about yourself
HB: I thought it wasn't going to work
Me: You're cute so I'm willing to look past your 8 kids and get to know you better
HB: Ahah I think that was a compliment why dont you tell me something about yourself
Me: How about we play the random question game. First question, did you drink egg so far this Christmas holiday?
HB: Allergic hbu?
Me: Are you allergic to eggs? And nope I haven't but it's like my favorite drink
HB: Milk - they do sell a milk free one though

Some of this is ok, and she's playing along with your banter; that's good. But it's very clear she got bored from here (and was already getting bored).

Why would that be your question? Such a boring question....

Spice it up man... show some balls... "I like girls who like to kiss with passion. On a scale of 1-10 - how much do you like kissing?"

A possibly response is: "That's too much of a personal question." And in that case she's saying "I'm not interested in you like that." And you move on... This friendly stuff can leave you chasing lots of uninterested girls. NO WHERE in here do you seem to be figuring out if she's interested in your sexually.

If she says, "Well, you'd really like me then.... 10!" THEN my friend - you are getting somewhere... fast (if you're unsure why: It's because she's qualifying herself to you; which is always a great thing when sex is the context).


Just show sexual interest in her, and if she doesn't return it - she's probably not interested... Problem solved....

 

[Mr Wright]

Rex only deals with chicks in real life and he doesn't even ask for the number, namely because numbers are meaningless. If I'm hollering at a chick, instead of doing the traditional number exchange and assuming that I'm going to be the only the that going to holla at this chick during the week. Rex strikes while the iron is hot. I'll ask her out right, then, and there. If she accepts, I'll take her to Cold Stone, Subways, or for a drink. If she's willing to accompany me, (a complete stranger,) to another venue, not only will it solidify future dates, it's a major IoI or you can do what PrettyBoyAJ does and give the chick your number, putting the onus on her to contact you.

What you're saying isn't rationale, trying to gauge a chick's interest level via a series of binary code symbols.

I understand what you're saying but having an instant date sort of thing as your primary way of dating chicks is foolish. Also for a girl to call a guy first is a massive investment on her part so you will only get girls who are really into you from the start(which is rare) so you'll be forever waiting for that one girl who actually calls you first. I reckon this has only worked a handful of times at best, feel free to prove me wrong.

 

[Maximus Rex]

But It Works...

I understand what you're saying but having an instant date sort of thing as your primary way of dating chicks is foolish.

Why is it foolish? If a chick agrees to this isn't it fair to say her interest level is very high?

Also for a girl to call a guy first is a massive investment on her part so you will only get girls who are really into you from the start(which is rare) so you'll be forever waiting for that one girl who actually calls you first. I reckon this has only worked a handful of times at best, feel free to prove me wrong.

I'm willing to admit that to have a chick come out of comfort zone and call you, one must have his game on another level.

so you will only get girls who are really into you from the start(which is rare) so you'll be forever waiting for that one girl who actually calls you first. I reckon this has only worked a handful of times at best, feel free to prove me wrong.

You must of never read any of PrettyBoyAJ's field reports or his interview.

Rex: On average, how many approaches do you make in a week?

PrettyBoyAJ: Depends on my situation. If I'm single then it's probably 10+. If I'm occupied with someone it'll be just a couple.

Rex: Out those approaches, how many chicks do you give your number to?

PrettyBoyAJ: ALL


Rex: How many call back?

PrettyBoyAJ: 70%


Rex: How many will flake on you?

PrettyBoyAJ: None because they hit me up first.

Rex: How many will agree to a date?

PrettyBoyAJ: All of them, they hit me up for a reason.

Rex: How many will you smash?

PrettyBoyAJ: All of them that don't have wack conversation.

AJ's Journal, as you read through it, you'll notice that he NEVER asks a chick for her number and he's been quite successful.

 

[RememberMoi]

If you're going to do text game for more than logistics - you better be a lot more interesting than you are.



****y and funny don't work well through text unless she's VERY interested. "I guess I'll forgive you" is assuming rapport is there; it's assuming she cares. But, she has no value placed on you yet.

Instead of doing this act - you should focus on flirting with her... Instead you're either having this basic convo with her or acting like you're the prize.




What is your goal here? Figure out what it is and LEAD the conversation into the direction of your goal. If she doesn't play along with your goal - dump the conversation or pitch the meet.

For me: My initial conversations with a woman are to figure out if she can keep up, both mentally and sexually. So I flirt and bring sexual innuendos into the conversation. If she doesn't get it or doesn't play along - it's on to the next one.

You don't have to take it to this extreme, but this basic banter is not going to get you anywhere through text. You're much better off just trying to come up a date asap if this is what you're going to do.





You really like pushing the "I'm the man" envelope, don't you?

You're not really getting anywhere with this because you don't have a clear direction. Everything you say should have a purpose. And trying to self-value yourself is a weak purpose.





Who's chasing who now? Who's qualifying themselves! Yes yes.... All that chest pumping reversed in 3 words and 2 emoticons!






Some of this is ok, and she's playing along with your banter; that's good. But it's very clear she got bored from here (and was already getting bored).

Why would that be your question? Such a boring question....

Spice it up man... show some balls... "I like girls who like to kiss with passion. On a scale of 1-10 - how much do you like kissing?"

A possibly response is: "That's too much of a personal question." And in that case she's saying "I'm not interested in you like that." And you move on... This friendly stuff can leave you chasing lots of uninterested girls. NO WHERE in here do you seem to be figuring out if she's interested in your sexually.

If she says, "Well, you'd really like me then.... 10!" THEN my friend - you are getting somewhere... fast (if you're unsure why: It's because she's qualifying herself to you; which is always a great thing when sex is the context).


Just show sexual interest in her, and if she doesn't return it - she's probably not interested... Problem solved....

I understand what you're saying and appreciate the answer, but it leaves me a bit lost. With this knowledge... Now how would you apply it? Like could you formulate some text examples, or give a brief run down as to how you would like a conversation to go with a girl you met over Tinder?

 

[Maximus Rex]

I understand what you're saying and appreciate the answer, but it leaves me a bit lost. With this knowledge... Now how would you apply it? Like could you formulate some text examples, or give a brief run down as to how you would like a conversation to go with a girl you met over Tinder?

You should e-mail Harry Wilington. He knows about this kind of sh*t.

 

[TitanSS]

you're spending too much time texting her. you put everything out there through texting and left nothing to mystery. You're supposed to leave her wanting more not text her until shes bored with you.