How to stop games and immaturity in younger chics

[Solarium]

So I've been dating this 18 yr old HB 8 for a few months. We have plenty of fun and wild crazy adventures (think sex and BJ on a jet ski in the middle of the ocean and getting caught by police at the park) and have been having a blast. When we are together, especially having sex, I feel like the dominant one in the relationship, someone who controls the pace and the direction of the relationship, while she's the one who's giving me all the attention. But when we are apart, I feel like she's got the hold on me by playing some kind of phone game. This mind game is driving me crazy, and I feel that I would rather end this then to keep playing this.

For example, with my other girls/guys who are friends, we text or call each other and reply as soon as we see the message, but with her I feel like she's delaying the response. We always try to talk to each other before we go to sleep (I know it's AFC I should stop this) but sometimes she does something unpredictable and not call, and I would usually wait for her to call so in the end nobody calls. Or she delays a text reply for hours when I know she checks her phone pretty often. I tried to talk to her about this and she confessed that she couldn't sleep whenever we don't call each other (I usually tell her that I can sleep even tho I can't) and she was waiting for me to call too, which is pretty stupid because I do the same exact thing.

Another example is what happened yesterday morning. After dropping her off, she said that she wanted sunday to study for exams and such, and she said I should spend time with my parents who are visiting me from back home. I agreed to that saying that we spent a lot of time with each other already over the weekend and that's a good idea to take time off from each other to catch a breath. I went home and slept then woke up to her phone call, telling me that she misses me so much and that she canceled for this family party that they have to be free so that I can go see her. Later she texted me saying how much she did for me in the relationship and how she took work off on saturdays to be with me blah blah blah, and that she would wait for me to figure something out to go and see her that night. So I ended up going out with my buddy, and explained to her very clearly and calmly that my friend is leaving in a week and that I want to spend time with him before he leaves. Of course she got mad, and I called her on it and saying she's a big baby, and then she yelled that she can be a baby whenever she wants. I told her calmly that I will call her that night and talk to her later, then she just hung up on me. I end up calling her after movies twice, with no returned calls. I got pretty pissed because I was being mature about this and she wasn't, and she had to be a little b1tch and play these mind games on me like a little baby. This mind game has been bothering me a lot and I'm losing sleep over it, even though I know there's no way she's out there cheating on me on a sunday night before school while living with parents. I feel the need to stop this altogether, all these mind games and immaturity.

So I need to develop a plan how to stop this. I could totally freeze her out for 3 days, not returning her calls (just now she called me 7 times in a period of 30 minutes), to punish her and hope that she gets my drift and stop doing this. Or I could act as though it's not affecting me at all and I would keep being mature about this, and hope that she will eventually stop realizing it won't work on me.

 

[TheDoctor]

#1. How old are you?
#2. You can't stop games and immaturity in younger chicks!
#3. Get used to it or move on.

Note: Everyone once in a while you will come across a younger girl who has their sh*t together, but often times you won't.

 

[DJDamage]

Why are you dating only this girl? of course she will control this relationship because she is your only source of intimacy and you are letting her get away with sh1t instead of dating other chicks and naturally not worry about her sh1t. There are simple solutions to every problem:

For example, with my other girls/guys who are friends, we text or call each other and reply as soon as we see the message, but with her I feel like she's delaying the response.

If she is delaying the response, why are you texting to her in the first place? stop texting and only talk to her on the phone. If she can't talk to you on the phone then she can fvck off.

We always try to talk to each other before we go to sleep (I know it's AFC I should stop this) but sometimes she does something unpredictable and not call, and I would usually wait for her to call so in the end nobody calls.

You need to stop doing that. She isn't worrying about you not calling her because she knows that you eventually will.

she confessed that she couldn't sleep whenever we don't call each other (I usually tell her that I can sleep even tho I can't) and she was waiting for me to call too, which is pretty stupid

Yes it is stupid because all she wants to do is to get attention in which you are freely giving it away. Its good for a girl to feel a little bit anxious from time to time.

So I ended up going out with my buddy, and explained to her very clearly and calmly that my friend is leaving in a week and that I want to spend time with him before he leaves. Of course she got mad, and I called her on it and saying she's a big baby, and then she yelled that she can be a baby whenever she wants. I told her calmly that I will call her that night and talk to her later, then she just hung up on me.I end up calling her after movies twice, with no returned calls. I got pretty pissed because I was being mature about this and she wasn't, and she had to be a little b1tch and play these mind games on me like a little baby.

There you see right there, you knew she was playing mind games so why did you agree to join her in her game? I bet she loved the feeling of putting you into place and not pick up the phone when you called. You shouldn't have called her in the first place because she was rude to you and hung the phone on you. She should have been the one feeling anxious and worried by thinking "I just disrespected him, he might not want to put up with my sh1t anymore, I should probably call him to appologize unless he calls me first".

So I need to develop a plan how to stop this. I could totally freeze her out for 3 days, not returning her calls (just now she called me 7 times in a period of 30 minutes), to punish her and hope that she gets my drift and stop doing this. Or I could act as though it's not affecting me at all and I would keep being mature about this, and hope that she will eventually stop realizing it won't work on me.

You need to date other women period. All those games you are planning may work in the short run but you will eventually find yourself right back where you started.

 

[decades]

what do you expect? she is 18. this is normal for an 18 year old.

 

[KontrollerX]

I agree with everything DJ Damage has said.

Also your idea to not contact her again until she contacts you is sound.

When she finally calls you again or contacts you in some way do what Rollo did to his current wife for hanging up on him.

Tell her if she ever hangs up on you again that is the last time she will ever hang up on you again.

You are done with her forever if she does that and make sure she understands you are deadly serious about this as an issue of respect.

Make sure if you say this you hold to your word and don't let her manipulate you back with her if she hangs up on you again and thinks she can get away with it and that you were not serious.

She will need to learn the lesson that a man keeps his word and you also need to learn that lesson as well the lesson that relationships with young chicks have a shelf life before the bullsh!t drama and games start and to prevent yourself from being overcome by it and turned into an AFC pvssy that ends up begging the b!tch to spend some time with you or not to leave you, you have to have many other options to turn to for sex and intimacy.

As the poster Diesel once said that keeps stupid drama head games playing chicks in check.

 

[Solarium]

I agree with everything DJ Damage has said.

Also your idea to not contact her again until she contacts you is sound.

When she finally calls you again or contacts you in some way do what Rollo did to his current wife for hanging up on him.

Tell her if she ever hangs up on you again that is the last time she will ever hang up on you again.

You are done with her forever if she does that and make sure she understands you are deadly serious about this as an issue of respect.

Make sure if you say this you hold to your word and don't let her manipulate you back with her if she hangs up on you again and thinks she can get away with it and that you were not serious.

She will need to learn the lesson that a man keeps his word and you also need to learn that lesson as well the lesson that relationships with young chicks have a shelf life before the bullsh!t drama and games start and to prevent yourself from being overcome by it and turned into an AFC pvssy that ends up begging the b!tch to spend some time with you or not to leave you, you have to have many other options to turn to for sex and intimacy.

As the poster Diesel once said that keeps stupid drama head games playing chicks in check.

Damn, never knew dating a younger chic would be this much trouble. I blinded myself by commiting in a exclusive relationship with this girl since the beginning was so good and I've never dated someone so young. It's partially my fault too, I revealed too much about myself, that I was involved with my ex while I was with her LDR for the 1st 4 months, which I thought was the reason why I was going crazy because of my guilt for hiding that fact. I dug myself a hole too big now to exit, I somehow convinced her to reject her dream university into going to a community college on the opposite side of the country with me and live with me. With a sacrifice that big on her part, I no doubt she need to sh1t test me before comming with me. We are leaving in 2 weeks, and there's no way she can stay here at home. I don't know how to break it to her now even if I wanted a breakup. I mean, if things will work out all the better, but this sh1t still doesn't stop I have no idea what to do. Of course she might be lying about comming with me, but I doubt that since I already met her entire family and she met my parents, and her family now hates me for that fact that I'm "stealing" her away.

update: looks like she gave me 2 more calls since then, and she thinks something is wrong. I would like to punish her for what she did and not call her back for 3 days making myself feel better, but I don't feel like training a dog can be much help to my personal morals and values, and that I have a feeling somehow these games will always come back to haunt me in the long run.

 

[DonGorgon]

When she is not with you.. she is ****1NG other men.. its what most females do..

Solution?

when you drop her off you go pick up your other 18 year old Fbuddy..

 

[KontrollerX]

"I somehow convinced her to reject her dream university into going to a community college on the opposite side of the country with me and live with me. With a sacrifice that big on her part, I no doubt she need to sh1t test me before comming with me."

I can understand your thinking this and she may of even felt this way as well but the both of you need to understand that ultimately everyone in life is responsible for their own decisions. So she sacrificed for you? It was still her decision which she needs to own rather than hang over your head as a means through which you owe her. You owe her nothing. She made her own independent decision but she was not wise enough to understand that fact and that she alone is responsible for it. Its like peer pressure to do drugs. If ones peers didn't literally force the drugs into the person's lungs or the veins of their arms then that person is responsible for the peer pressured choice they made solely. Its certainly assh0lish to put peer pressure onto people to do drugs or something they'd rather not do but ultimately it is up to the person being pressured to be strong enough and educated enough to say no just as it was up to your girl to make a better decision for herself rather than going through with a decision and trying to make you owe her for it.

"but this sh1t still doesn't stop I have no idea what to do."

You need to react to her like an ice cold playa. Basically read a pile of Metaphysical's posts as well DJDan which was his other username and read his mentor TheRealSupreme's posts as well check out some of his youtube videos if you get time.

The jist of their advice is that you always remain in control as a man and that you give women plenty of drama they can get themselves off over and that means if you want to sleep with other chicks do that and if your woman finds out and gets pissed about it point to the door and tell her she's free to leave at anytime but if she wants to stay she might want to shut the fvck up as she's making your ears bleed and you'll force her out that door if she doesn't get in line and be the kind of girlfriend that you want.

Sometimes girls will leave you for this kind of behavior and maybe many girls will but in all honesty many more LOVE this behavior and if you don't believe me go look up some posts by the poster SunnyD. She loves being treated like the piece of trash she is.

What I'm saying though ultimately is live your life on your own terms and you'll have the most fun.

Many of the younger DJ's and morality crew symps scoff at this type of advice because they are so worried about a particular woman leaving them and them having to go generate more options.

Tough sh!t for them but when it comes to the guys who have the balls to try this and play the numbers game, accept that many women will leave you, eventually that guy will also find out that many women will stay and before you know it you'll have a stable of b!tches willing to suck your c0ck practically on command because you were one of the brave men out there with the ambition to play the numbers game and live life on your own terms and not some silly head games playing b!tch's.

"Of course she might be lying about comming with me, but I doubt that since I already met her entire family and she met my parents, and her family now hates me for that fact that I'm "stealing" her away."

Yeah you really need to find a way to break up with her or at least shut down this moving in together idea and SOONER rather than LATER.

Read Rollo's post here for details as to why...

Iron Rule of Tomassi #4

NEVER under any circumstance live with a woman you aren't married to or are not planning to marry in within 6 months.

You are utterly powerless in this situation. NEVER buy a home with a girlfriend, NEVER sign a rental lease with a girlfriend. NEVER agree to move into her home and absolutely NEVER move a woman into your own established living arrangement. I'm adamantly opposed to the "shacking up" mythology, it is a TRAP that far too many men allow themselves to fall into. My fervor agianst this isn't based on some moral issue, it it simple pragmatism. I know guys right now living in the pit of misery with women they signed apartment leases with for a year and are basically living with their Exes now for the duration. If you live with a woman you may as well be married because upon doing so every liability and accountability of marriage is then in effect. You not only lose any freedom of anonymity, you commit legally to being responsible for the continuation of your living arrangements regardless of how your relationship decays.

I should also emphasize the point that when you commit to cohabiting with a GF you will notice a marked decrease in her sexual availability and desire, trust me on this. All of that competitive anxiety and it's resulting sexual tension that made your single sex life so great is removed from her shoulders and she can comfortably relax in the knowledge that she is your ONLY source of sexual intimacy. Putting your name on that lease with her (even if it's just your name) is akin to signing an insurance policy for her - "I the undersigned herby promise not to ƒuck any woman but this girl for a one year term." She thinks, "if he wasn't serious about me, he wouldn't have signed the lease." Now all of that impetus and energy that made having marathon sex with you an outright necessity is relaxed. She controls the frame and she's got it in writing that it is for at least a year. And in your case it doesn't sound as if she's all that sexually available in the first place.

Just don't do it. Relationships last best when you spin more plates or at the very least keep each other at arm's distance. Look how this applies to your situation here.

"I don't feel like training a dog can be much help to my personal morals and values, and that I have a feeling somehow these games will always come back to haunt me in the long run."

Wrong answer.

Women are games players first and completely amoral second.

As a man you must learn to play their own stupid games better than they do and beat them in the human chess match as often as possible as despite what the morality symps say relationships are ultimately adversarial as the woman's biology on a subconscious level forces her to constantly fvck with us to test to see if we would be a suitable mate and be crafty and cunning enough to protect her and raise her children and if we can't beat her at these stupid games than obviously we are not up to par for being her mate at which point for us it becomes game over and she ends up banging the pool boy.

So the only way "games" will come back to haunt you is if you shun them in favor of the AFC line of thinking of being moral and "not like other guys" in that way.

You must train her like a leader trains the troops to go into battle.

Ever notice how on all those feminist forums those hardcore bulldykes act and want to be men and they call us dogs that need to be trained?

Well they are utilizing a man's perspective when they say that.

So train your woman well and don't be guilty about it.

She wants you to train her even though she'll never admit it or consciously know that is what she wants.

 

[Solarium]

"Of course she might be lying about comming with me, but I doubt that since I already met her entire family and she met my parents, and her family now hates me for that fact that I'm "stealing" her away."

Yeah you really need to find a way to break up with her or at least shut down this moving in together idea and SOONER rather than LATER.

Read Rollo's post here for details as to why...

I understand your advocate for not living together, but how about living in a place for 3 months with me paying the rent? That way I have the power and can kick her out whenever there's a single thought of rebellion.

"I don't feel like training a dog can be much help to my personal morals and values, and that I have a feeling somehow these games will always come back to haunt me in the long run."

Wrong answer.

Women are games players first and completely amoral second.

As a man you must learn to play their own stupid games better than they do and beat them in the human chess match as often as possible as despite what the morality symps say relationships are ultimately adversarial as the woman's biology on a subconscious level forces her to constantly fvck with us to test to see if we would be a suitable mate and be crafty and cunning enough to protect her and raise her children and if we can't beat her at these stupid games than obviously we are not up to par for being her mate at which point for us it becomes game over and she ends up banging the pool boy.

So the only way "games" will come back to haunt you is if you shun them in favor of the AFC line of thinking of being moral and "not like other guys" in that way.

You must train her like a leader trains the troops to go into battle.

Ever notice how on all those feminist forums those hardcore bulldykes act and want to be men and they call us dogs that need to be trained?

Well they are utilizing a man's perspective when they say that.

So train your woman well and don't be guilty about it.

She wants you to train her even though she'll never admit it or consciously know that is what she wants.

How hard should I train her? She called me 20+ times in the past 5 hours and that's scaring me. I was thinking of freezing her for 3 days but that might completely push her over the edge. She told me she was never hurt or dumped in a relationship, but given the current circumstances and her parent's divorce... I think she was traumatized permanently in her youth.

 

[rushing dude 123]

Dude i am sure this has already been said maybe, but u sound like how a dj would treat a chick, but with u being the chick "We always try to talk to each other before we go to sleep (I know it's AFC I should stop this) but sometimes she does something unpredictable and not call, and I would usually wait for her to call so in the end nobody calls" This is exactlly what gets done to them and how they think, so why is it happening to u and i am sure u know u got a problem.

Also **** a relationship where u got to play mind games, what u need to do is not care and don't expect her to do things and this will give u a lot more dominant role and the tables will turn. If she dosn't call, so what, just relax. I usually find 16-20 year olds very annoying to date and all this behaviour is expected and the only way she is going to change is with time pretty much. U can punish bad behaviour with these girls, but i find they got a resilence of steel lol and they do not get bored of playing games.

And that rent idea is going to burn a lot out of ur pocket, with all this rushing u got to ask urself one question is she worth this?

 

[Phenomenal One]

There you see right there, you knew she was playing mind games so why did you agree to join her in her game? I bet she loved the feeling of putting you into place and not pick up the phone when you called. You shouldn't have called her in the first place because she was rude to you and hung the phone on you. She should have been the one feeling anxious and worried by thinking "I just disrespected him, he might not want to put up with my sh1t anymore, I should probably call him to appologize unless he calls me first".

this girl i know was supposed to get a ride from her boyfriend to her parents house. she was waiting for him at her apartment for a while, she was on the phone with him and she cursed him out. the guy bumped into an old friend, hung out with him for a while and lost track of time. the day after he called her parents house lookin for her. the girl ignored his calls because she waited to "teach him a lesson". the mom wanted to answer the phone and tell him a bunch of lies to make him feel bad.

some guys need to stop making themselves out to be the bad guy.

 

[strong like bull]

What I'm saying though ultimately is live your life on your own terms and you'll have the most fun.

Many of the younger DJ's and morality crew symps scoff at this type of advice because they are so worried about a particular woman leaving them and them having to go generate more options.

Tough sh!t for them but when it comes to the guys who have the balls to try this and play the numbers game, accept that many women will leave you, eventually that guy will also find out that many women will stay and before you know it you'll have a stable of b!tches willing to suck your c0ck practically on command because you were one of the brave men out there with the ambition to play the numbers game and live life on your own terms and not some silly head games playing b!tch's.

best advice ever.

especially the first part.

you have to live your life on your own terms. you have to do the things that brings you the most fulfillment. if you meet a girl you like and she wants to come for the ride... thats ok but the trains rolling... either shes on board or she isnt!

weve all experienced it first hand - most girl problems stem from the guy easing up on chasing his dreams and desires, in order to cater to his new girls desires. he thinks hes "doing the right thing" and giving her all the attention she "deserves", not realizing that hes handing over his power to her. ultimately, he stops being the ambitious, driven, challenging man she fell in love with. and then the problems start...

ive even gotten ****-tested about going to the gym 3-4 days a week. because those hours throughout the week id be in the gym, i could be with "her" instead. HELLO.... ive been working out for the past 8 years and really enjoy the health and physical benefits... all the sudden im gonna give up something i love so we can spend an afternoon holding hands walking through bed bad and beyond?

men build towers, women cast webs. its in their nature to cling. but its our job to stay focused on what really matters. dont let their **** tests sway your vision. theyre just testing you to see if youre really the man you seem. and by giving in to their **** test, picking the answer they would seem they want you to choose... its actually the wrong answer. stick to your guns! you know what does and doesnt make sense.

-SLB

 

[Luscious]

When you sense games or immaturity...just don't drop to that level.

You've got your own friends, your own priorities, and your own life.

If she wants to be a part of your life, she'll play by your rules.

If not, it's a good thing you have other prospects.

 

[Sp1kez]

Sounds like she's obsessed over you and tries to "punish" you whenever you don't give in to her demands. Seems like she wants you to go serious with her

 

[Solarium]

after reading this post I think my girl is a playette. She end up calling me 30+ times yesterday, text me trying to say sorry and get me to talk to her, and now reactivating her FB to talk to me there. I was thinking of regaining control by breaking to her that I know that she's a playette who like to manipulate guys, and that I know exactly what she's doing to me, like acting cold/hot, phone games, and that even though I know she's that type of person I still love her, but the only way we can stay together is to stop playing games with me. I get her to move with me to get into my own frame, with my own friends and my own environment, but not live in the same apartment. I will from now on close my heart to her and at the same time get as many other chics as possible. I will use her game on her at the same time, seeing her once in awhile and eventually become fvck buddies with her. This is going to be hard on me because I already fell for her, and the only time I can think right is when I stop all contacts with her like now. Do you guys think I can pull this off, or in the end I will be the one who gets hurt?

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

,..do what Rollo did to his current wife,..

For the record she's my only wife,..heheh, maybe that's splitting hairs,..