How to "re hook" a female...

[DaddyLongShanks]

So I'm new here. I've been on relationship, marriage and infidelity boards since 2007. And one of the most common things to repair a situation is to up your attraction and take care of yourself all else will fall into place....

I stumbled across this board, and the Alpha and no BS level is high. A bunch of guys who respect themselves, and will not be doormatted by a female. I have to say, the mentality is seeping back into me, it's my OLD swag!

So I currently have a female. In the woman sphere she would be considered a highly attractive alpha female. She gets away with being "stupider" than she is, because the world folds into her looks.

She's 10 years younger than me. I've lost a lot of my hold on her, and Alpha level has taken a slip. I gained some weight, much of which I have gotten off, I'm almost to a male fitness to amateur body builder in physical form. I have good money.

I never had her in competition with other babes, and I have treated her kind of like she is my wife. This to me is a mistake knowing the type of female she is.

The result of all of this is she isn't coming to me as hard as I would like...

She is the type of female who if a guy has a lot of action going on becomes more interested, I found by accident if she knew other females were interested in me, she would get more attracted, and even nicer to me...

I was wondering if anyone had a relation slip with one they wanted to be with, and was able to do X+Y+Z and to "re hook" them, to get them enchanted, etc.

I don't care if I have to dump, ignore her, date other babes, talk down to her, whatever...

I need a system and a plan to tilt the balances more in my favour.

Thanks...

 

[DaddyLongShanks]

So I'm new here. I've been on relationship, marriage and infidelity boards since 2007. And one of the most common things to repair a situation is to up your attraction and take care of yourself all else will fall into place....

I stumbled across this board, and the Alpha and no BS level is high. A bunch of guys who respect themselves, and will not be doormatted by a female. I have to say, the mentality is seeping back into me, it's my OLD swag!

So I currently have a female. In the woman sphere she would be considered a highly attractive alpha female. She gets away with being "stupider" than she is, because the world folds into her looks.

She's 10 years younger than me. I've lost a lot of my hold on her, and Alpha level has taken a slip. I gained some weight, much of which I have gotten off, I'm almost to a male fitness to amateur body builder in physical form. I have good money.

I never had her in competition with other babes, and I have treated her kind of like she is my wife. This to me is a mistake knowing the type of female she is.

The result of all of this is she isn't coming to me as hard as I would like...

She is the type of female who if a guy has a lot of action going on becomes more interested, I found by accident if she knew other females were interested in me, she would get more attracted, and even nicer to me...

I was wondering if anyone had a relation slip with one they wanted to be with, and was able to do X+Y+Z and to "re hook" them, to get them enchanted, etc.

I don't care if I have to dump, ignore her, date other babes, talk down to her, whatever...

I need a system and a plan to tilt the balances more in my favour.

Thanks...

Need some advice here fellas. I know I'm not the only one had this happen to them.

 

[Igetit!]

So I'm new here. I've been on relationship, marriage and infidelity boards since 2007. And one of the most common things to repair a situation is to up your attraction and take care of yourself all else will fall into place....

I stumbled across this board, and the Alpha and no BS level is high. A bunch of guys who respect themselves, and will not be doormatted by a female. I have to say, the mentality is seeping back into me, it's my OLD swag!

So I currently have a female. In the woman sphere she would be considered a highly attractive alpha female. She gets away with being "stupider" than she is, because the world folds into her looks.

She's 10 years younger than me. I've lost a lot of my hold on her, and Alpha level has taken a slip. I gained some weight, much of which I have gotten off, I'm almost to a male fitness to amateur body builder in physical form. I have good money.

I never had her in competition with other babes, and I have treated her kind of like she is my wife. This to me is a mistake knowing the type of female she is.

The result of all of this is she isn't coming to me as hard as I would like...

She is the type of female who if a guy has a lot of action going on becomes more interested, I found by accident if she knew other females were interested in me, she would get more attracted, and even nicer to me...

I was wondering if anyone had a relation slip with one they wanted to be with, and was able to do X+Y+Z and to "re hook" them, to get them enchanted, etc.

Yeah....I went through something similiar to this a long......a LOOOONG time ago. It was one of those "life lessons" about women and dating that I never forgot. I picked up this lesson back in 2003...2004ish,but remember it just like it was yesterday.


Luckily for you,this question has already come up before,so it's already been typed out....I can just link it for you.

Of course,there's no guarantee,but it did work for me. There has to be SOME interest left on HER part though,otherwise you'll just be wasting your time. If there's even a little bit left,you should be able to raise it.

Anyway,just skip down to reply #14....you don't have to read the whole thing.

Here you go.....

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=156533

 

[sharkbeat]

I wouldn't call a stupid female an alpha female. If you ever wife an alpha female, she wouldn't mind to slit your enemies' throats for you. This chick doesn't sound like that kind of female.

Anyway, the general advice for this situation is to unfortunately forget about her and live with options. Right now, you are in the scarcity mentality rather than abundance. This will affect your behavior around her, and the female can sniff this desperation and run as far away as socially possible.

The trick about abundance mentality however is that you should really not think of her. I mean, her worth to you should be so small that you wouldn't be writing a thread about her here on SS. The fact that you did, and the time difference between your first and second post demanding for an answer is only 4 hours away, that says she must really means a lot to you.

Drop her from your head and start living.

 

[VladPatton]

Put her on the back burner....big time. She doesn't call you for a week? Great, you don't call her for two. It'll speak volumes about interest level. That's all it really is, man, a decline in her interest for you. Sometimes there need not be a reason. Women will do that.

I wouldn't waste my time with games, bull$hit methods, or magic potions. You could be mackin a great new chick in this time frame; one that is actually into you. Consider the big dumparoo, though.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

OP,

There is an essence of stagnation about your story, an element of apathy from both sides.

1) You think she's losing interest, which people invariably do.
2) Your willing to date other people in order to get her back on good terms.

The only problem here is the second part of point 2 - you shouldn't really care. And you can date other women, as many as you like. A man's job is to love a woman, a woman's job is to be in love with a man. There is a subtle difference. And it regards personal power and emotional self control.

This sounds like it's starting to run it's course. There's no harm in moving on and seeing what happens in future. Meanwhile, you sound pretty confident in yourself and abilities anyway.

 

[DaddyLongShanks]

OP,

There is an essence of stagnation about your story, an element of apathy from both sides.

1) You think she's losing interest, which people invariably do.
2) Your willing to date other people in order to get her back on good terms.

The only problem here is the second part of point 2 - you shouldn't really care. And you can date other women, as many as you like. A man's job is to love a woman, a woman's job is to be in love with a man. There is a subtle difference. And it regards personal power and emotional self control.

This sounds like it's starting to run it's course. There's no harm in moving on and seeing what happens in future. Meanwhile, you sound pretty confident in yourself and abilities anyway.

I don't mind things stagnating and settling down. At this stage in her life she has more of a "girl" and not a "womans" mindset. So some of the games are required to keep and peak their interest.

I have not managed any of this. Instead counting on her for emotional support, talking too much, letting my health slip, taking better care of her than myself...

Our balance is upset, I'm not going to next her but have no problem back burnering her and doing a bachelor style dating and getting out there and investing into myself.

What I'm currently doing:

1. Working a second job, just added 4/20. Income level is at the top 3% of earners for this country.
2. Stopped drinking.
3. Back in the gym, physique goal is between a male fitness model and amateur body builder. More than enough to be a male stripper if I had to.
4. Added salsa and step classes. Gets me around the opposite sex in a non-confrontational environment.
5. I had let my wardrobe slip. I will add to the wardrobe and have clean, stylish and fresh clothes and shoes for different occasions.
6. May join No more Mr Nice Guy seminar
7. Will add boxing or Krav
8. Talk and do less, respond less to the lady
9. Get out there and date. I don't want to slut it up. But this female does respond to an in demand male and being cheated on isn't the end of the earth for her. It actually raises her attraction and interest level and she will fight to keep him. So I could be boning at least once a month outside the relationship to keep the Yin-Yang balance happy

So I'm going to take better care of myself, upped the physique from a couch potatoe to a hot bod on a man. I'm going to worry about and do less and communicate less to her. I'm going to do some things outside the house she may not like and I will be too busy a lot more often. A woman like this loves this ****.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

Good. Sounds like you got it all sewn up really. Am in a similar situation.

Before you start going to seminars and sh!t, check out some of Corey Wayne's video's. The guy really knows what he's talking about. A good one is 'Dud to Stud in 4 days'. I can also recommend 'The Attraction of Indifference'. Some of the stories are brilliant, as are some of his reactions. Been practicing some of the stuff myself, especially around meeting people - just making sure I meet, or at least greet, new people most days.

Also properly getting back in shape.

 

[bigneil]

You rehook a female the same way you unpop a balloon.

A woman fantasizes about a certain man her whole life. She meets you and seeks a counterexample. Once she finds it, you are not the guy she imagined and can never undo the damage.

 

[DaddyLongShanks]

Thing about it is you can become more interesting and attractiv, its not a quick process. And youd be better off breaking up and messing with females into you.


If you stay with her id do alot outside the house and minimize interactions.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

The aim of the game is to do things for yourself, not to attract new or old women. Attracting women is a mere consequence. Think of all the needy women you've met, who have nothing going for them except you. They try everything in their power to keep you; it's wholly unattractive and uncomfortable-making..

Same goes for women. They don't like guys 'impressing' them much. It's deceitful and duplicitous - you're bascially saying, 'I work out so you'll f*ck me', rather than, 'I work out because I wanna be in peak shape'. Special occasions aside, never go out of your way to impress them. Ninety-nine percent of everything you do in life should be largely self serving, at least outside of work.

 

[DaddyLongShanks]

There are things you can do and habits you can have which would increase your interest level with females. Kinda like the chunky babe who slimmed down and now all of a sudden she's super hot.

IL does work, it takes time. guru1000 was telling me he lost 30 lbs and it made all the difference in the world, from struggling with 7's, to having 9's bend over backwards for him.

Also having some material goods in the world that is hard not to be attracted to.

IL does work. Of course for a LTR you want her to like you for your heart, for who you are as a person. But me and a guy friend of mine both agreed.

A female can love your dirty drawers... But if you are hotter now, she's going to desire you that much more. So IL is important even if someone already loves you.

I think sosuave.net for making this principle so easily to digest.

 

[Infern0]

Story time.

A couple of years ago I met a girl who initially showed high IL, however at this time I was AFC and I lacked the agression and confidence to make a move, although at the start she was calling me asking to hang out etc, as I say I was bad AFC.

Eventually I mustered up the courage to "vomit my feelings" on her in a clumsy and awkward as hell way. She said she thought I was a great guy etc and she thought we could be happy together but that she wasn't attracted to me.

Being a stupid AFC I thought she meant she thought I was ugly which wasn't the case.

Anyway I did one thing right and refused friend zone. Didn't see or hear from her for 6 months. During this time I began learning on sites like this and improved somewhat. I'd say I went from 1/10 to 5.5/10 in terms of skills.

I used some of the stuff I'd learned on her and her IL skyrocketed, I managed to seal the deal with her almost instantly. She was commenting on how I'd changed, acting nervous and giggling around me like a schoolgirl, she was eating out of the palm of my hand. Fair to say at this stage she was attracted to me.

After a while the relationship collapsed due to me becoming AFC again because I hadn't finished learning yet, however the door remains open and from a 5.5 I'd say I'm now an 8.

I'm no longer in scarcity mindset and I know she'll be back at some point and I'll be able to put her on her back again literally and figuratively and KEEP her here because I'll stay in the zone and not become AFC again.

Moral is, learn the skills 100% and get out of the scarcity mindset.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

There are things you can do and habits you can have which would increase your interest level with females. Kinda like the chunky babe who slimmed down and now all of a sudden she's super hot.

IL does work, it takes time. guru1000 was telling me he lost 30 lbs and it made all the difference in the world, from struggling with 7's, to having 9's bend over backwards for him.

Also having some material goods in the world that is hard not to be attracted to.

IL does work. Of course for a LTR you want her to like you for your heart, for who you are as a person. But me and a guy friend of mine both agreed.

A female can love your dirty drawers... But if you are hotter now, she's going to desire you that much more. So IL is important even if someone already loves you.

I think sosuave.net for making this principle so easily to digest.

I see where you're coming from with this, and of course we all want other people to be interested in us. I suppose I just take a more simplistic, but realistic view.

Losing 30lbs, material goods, money are all things you should want for yourself anyway. Associating these things with another person's interest in you, well it's a natural thought to have.

However, people's interest in you will fluctuate naturally anyway, regardless of anything you do, are or have, and because of variables that are completely outside of your control - time of day, people at work, friends, family, because the pet f*cking hamster died. You get the idea.

So, yeah, acknowledge fully that bettering yourself will create interest and attraction in others. But then move on and just do it anyway because one day you may meet someone who does not return interest on your investments, and you may end up resenting them for it, which to be brutally honest, will be your problem, not theirs. And worse still, it may knock your confidence, which it shouldn't, because you f*cking love that car, success story, physical shape you're in anyway.

You're interested in me? Great, let's f*ck. What's that, you're not interested in me?... Meh, not my problem, not your problem. I think I'm f*cking awesome anyway.

 

[Baggio86]

So I'm new here. I've been on relationship, marriage and infidelity boards since 2007. And one of the most common things to repair a situation is to up your attraction and take care of yourself all else will fall into place....

I stumbled across this board, and the Alpha and no BS level is high. A bunch of guys who respect themselves, and will not be doormatted by a female. I have to say, the mentality is seeping back into me, it's my OLD swag!

So I currently have a female. In the woman sphere she would be considered a highly attractive alpha female. She gets away with being "stupider" than she is, because the world folds into her looks.

She's 10 years younger than me. I've lost a lot of my hold on her, and Alpha level has taken a slip. I gained some weight, much of which I have gotten off, I'm almost to a male fitness to amateur body builder in physical form. I have good money.

I never had her in competition with other babes, and I have treated her kind of like she is my wife. This to me is a mistake knowing the type of female she is.

The result of all of this is she isn't coming to me as hard as I would like...

She is the type of female who if a guy has a lot of action going on becomes more interested, I found by accident if she knew other females were interested in me, she would get more attracted, and even nicer to me...

I was wondering if anyone had a relation slip with one they wanted to be with, and was able to do X+Y+Z and to "re hook" them, to get them enchanted, etc.

I don't care if I have to dump, ignore her, date other babes, talk down to her, whatever...

I need a system and a plan to tilt the balances more in my favour.

Thanks...

Hi DaddyLongShanks, before I make any comments, I would like to say that from what I have read and my own experiance... this girl is toxic... I know it is easier said than done, but I would bail right now...

The reason you can tell she can get away with being stupider than she looks is because this is a tool she has developed over time, she knows she can manipulate using the whole 'Well I didn't realise what I was doing' mentality.. this, my friend, is a major red flag. Another MAJOR red flag is her becoming more interested when she thinks other girls are interested in you.. this is typical of girls that do not know you that well, but if she knows you deeply then this is purely a case of wanting to keep you hooked... for her own ego/security etc, or just to make you miserable (I've had it happen)

The reason you're in this situation is because you 'Treated her like a wife' and you did not DHV, if she thinks she has no competition she will lose interest rapidly... She needs to know what is at stake by pushing you away... she needs to realise someone else will sway you.. Right now she can feel your breath on her neck, she knows you ain't going anywhere.. you need to change that

If you think she is worth pursuing (I REALLY don't suggest that), its going to be hard you need to dump her.. don't do it in a harsh way.. something like how you are losing feelings cause she is not the same person you met... (she is going to dump you soon if you don't, and your position will be alot worse than it is now... trust me)... after which no calling.. no texting... when she contacts you ignore her every now and then and slowly fade out from her until you rarely reply at all. When you do speak act aloof, mention how much fun you're having, but without saying too much about what or why you're so happy, this will get the hamster wheel spinning.

If she is very attractive she will be used to guys drooling over her and not used to guys leaving her... this makes you the MAN in her eyes... then when all her orbiters start disgusting her with their needy behaviour, guess who will be the first person she thinks about?...

My personal advise though... dump her and never go back.. sounds like too much drama in the near future.

 

[DaddyLongShanks]

Hi DaddyLongShanks, before I make any comments, I would like to say that from what I have read and my own experiance... this girl is toxic... I know it is easier said than done, but I would bail right now...

The reason you can tell she can get away with being stupider than she looks is because this is a tool she has developed over time, she knows she can manipulate using the whole 'Well I didn't realise what I was doing' mentality.. this, my friend, is a major red flag. Another MAJOR red flag is her becoming more interested when she thinks other girls are interested in you.. this is typical of girls that do not know you that well, but if she knows you deeply then this is purely a case of wanting to keep you hooked... for her own ego/security etc, or just to make you miserable (I've had it happen)

The reason you're in this situation is because you 'Treated her like a wife' and you did not DHV, if she thinks she has no competition she will lose interest rapidly... She needs to know what is at stake by pushing you away... she needs to realise someone else will sway you.. Right now she can feel your breath on her neck, she knows you ain't going anywhere.. you need to change that

If you think she is worth pursuing (I REALLY don't suggest that), its going to be hard you need to dump her.. don't do it in a harsh way.. something like how you are losing feelings cause she is not the same person you met... (she is going to dump you soon if you don't, and your position will be alot worse than it is now... trust me)... after which no calling.. no texting... when she contacts you ignore her every now and then and slowly fade out from her until you rarely reply at all. When you do speak act aloof, mention how much fun you're having, but without saying too much about what or why you're so happy, this will get the hamster wheel spinning.

If she is very attractive she will be used to guys drooling over her and not used to guys leaving her... this makes you the MAN in her eyes... then when all her orbiters start disgusting her with their needy behaviour, guess who will be the first person she thinks about?...

My personal advise though... dump her and never go back.. sounds like too much drama in the near future.

Man. You are experienced in these situations, I can tell by how cut and dry you make this "process"...

She's "young", it's why she does some of the stupid things she does... And in her peer group she is a 9 out of 10. If her body could be rated in man's terms, it would be a perfectly built Zulu warrior with a 10.5" ****, rippled abs, well defined proportions and perfect teeth.

I'm confident I can get her chasing, and she will chase... I'm confident I can get her chasing by raising my own SMV to an absurdly high number. I can do it with physique and I have some money so I can put clothes on my back. To put myself out socially, even get a few plates that I poke occasionally...

I believe once she can know that I also have "nukes" that she will want to lock it down and act right. Right now it's like a pro basketball player, and a guy that's been on the bench for a few years, and hasn't really practiced, fat, etc...

Some of the ones I will "poke" are "friends", and I can do it without needing to wife them, in a mutually benefitial passionate sex arrangement.

I believe by giving the babe less time, putting a lot more into myself, being much more selfish, and keeping my image at a high level that she will gain much more interest, especially when I get social proofing consistently.

She will see me as the prize I am and will hold onto it. Actually I believe I can get away with having a couple of females as long as she feels she the top one...

If I did your breakup plan, and I think that is perfect execution of it, I don't think I would allow too much time to go by. I would frame it as "I think I need space... I feel that I've lost myself and I want to find it", she will panic at that point, but I wouldn't let her feel panicked forever. It would be long enough to put my new conditions in place.

 

[Baggio86]

Man. You are experienced in these situations, I can tell by how cut and dry you make this "process"...

She's "young", it's why she does some of the stupid things she does... And in her peer group she is a 9 out of 10. If her body could be rated in man's terms, it would be a perfectly built Zulu warrior with a 10.5" ****, rippled abs, well defined proportions and perfect teeth.

I'm confident I can get her chasing, and she will chase... I'm confident I can get her chasing by raising my own SMV to an absurdly high number. I can do it with physique and I have some money so I can put clothes on my back. To put myself out socially, even get a few plates that I poke occasionally...

I believe once she can know that I also have "nukes" that she will want to lock it down and act right. Right now it's like a pro basketball player, and a guy that's been on the bench for a few years, and hasn't really practiced, fat, etc...

Some of the ones I will "poke" are "friends", and I can do it without needing to wife them, in a mutually benefitial passionate sex arrangement.

I believe by giving the babe less time, putting a lot more into myself, being much more selfish, and keeping my image at a high level that she will gain much more interest, especially when I get social proofing consistently.

She will see me as the prize I am and will hold onto it. Actually I believe I can get away with having a couple of females as long as she feels she the top one...

If I did your breakup plan, and I think that is perfect execution of it, I don't think I would allow too much time to go by. I would frame it as "I think I need space... I feel that I've lost myself and I want to find it", she will panic at that point, but I wouldn't let her feel panicked forever. It would be long enough to put my new conditions in place.

Yeah, I've been through some karaaazzzy sh1t man! lol.

Okay, so she is young and obviously the stand out among her peers, this is usually how certain girls end up being so 'entitled', a girl like that is someone you should plate and not get attached to... she is too young to realise that her looks will fade and that will be a kick in those perfect teeth by age 30-35. so she currently is probably getting a lot of attention from most of her 'Guy Friends' also known as orbitors.. waiting for you to fvck up so they can pounce (this is good for you, which I will get on to)

The thing is, you may have status, looks, money and thats all good... for plates... you are right in working on your outer game, butwhat you need is to work on your inner game.. if a girl is feeling you, and can tell you will leave in a second, cause YOU'RE the prize, that gets her pant's wet quicker than any amount of money, body shape etc.. status gets the girl.. inner game and devotion to YOURSELF, is what keeps them.

I like your bro player analogy, it makes sense, but what you need to figure out is why you are doing all of this... it's for HER and not for YOU. Once you realise you should be better for yourself only, she will realise this and her insterest will sky rocket (but by then you'll have so many hotter HB's on your case you'll laugh at this).. but not if you're by her side.. you need to show her that she has to word to keep you. Right now she probably has several guys that 'like' every picture of her, that would run across the country to wipe some turd off of her shoe with their tongues, just for her to say "thanks little boy".. this makes her feel stronger than you and makes her think you're replaceable.

I believe by giving the babe less time, putting a lot more into myself, being much more selfish, and keeping my image at a high level that she will gain much more interest, especially when I get social proofing consistently.

^^^^^
This is the right frame, right there... keep on that level.

I agree with what you're saying about not taking too long, however if you tell her you want a break, her ego will kick in and she will break up with you to save face, so she can tell her girls that she left you... a woman will do anything to not lose face. I can see you're in a tricky situation... but my thinking is cut the chord.. she will either chase you and you gain the power back.. or she won't.. and you just saved a lot of time.

It's a decision that you have to make alone, don't let anyone else tell you what to do, but take what I say and what the others say and come to your own decision cause you're the one who has to live with it.

One thing I know for sure though, if she is losing interest, she will dump you soon, emotionally she may already have, and your chances of getting her back is much higher if you're the dumper than the dumpee... don't let her be the dumper bro.