How to raise an interest level? IGNORE HER!

stubbornlights

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Wolf said:
Like when you have oneitis and tons of hot girls want you but you are uninterested because you have oneitis.
I think the heart of the phenomenon lies in that sentence.
Everybody else has really covered it, and understands it, but it could be simplified further. In my experience, the two things at work here are...

INDIFFERENCE & AMBIGUITY
When you demonstrate no active interest in the outcome of your interactions, you convey a certain mystery, something that makes her restless. She can't pin down what your motives are, or even if you are seriously interested in her.

Females like to be the ones playing the games. They like to manipulate guys, putting them through various routines to analyze their behavior and determine whether or not they are of any interest. As men, if we want to be in control of the situation, we must be immune to this.

Alternate signs of interest and attraction with moments of sheer indifference. It will mess with her mind sooo much that she'll be forced to think about you constantly, trying to deconstruct you, to decipher your actions. This is good. The more you're on her mind, the better.

For women less inundated with hordes of men, it seems so much easier to run a normal seduction. I find that playing indifferent and ambiguous with them just complicates the interaction; I've had times when I've done this with girls, and they've completely given up on me, and weeks later, their friends will come up to me and confess that she was really into me, but felt like I was out of her league or didn't like her. Ooops. Lesson learned.

I definitely think this works best on the hotter chicks (9+). With them, assuming you've developed a modicum of rapport and can demonstrate shared interests, some form of basic connection, whatever, it almost feels easier, in my experience anyways, to act like this and to remove yourself from the pools of suitors that she's victim to. Make HER court you.

Any thoughts?
 

DonGorgon

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magickarl said:
^

I think a lot of the first line of my post was lost in translation:

"This only works if you already know the woman and see her pretty regularly"

I had been sleeping with this girl for two months, so there was already clear interest established between us both. The whole point of this was to show her that my time is a premium, and that I will not be expected to wait hand and foot on her. Also, I wanted to present the subtle message that my time is not a given, and she will have to compete and prove to me that my time is worth spending with her.

It places a higher value on me, and gives her a challenge at the same time.

BTW --- She was an HB8 - HB9. Not a perfect dime piece, but damned close.
Most men are interested in ways to get a woman they dont know like in a bar or club where other men are competing with you... ignoring her wont ever work unless you are a model or celebrity.
 

Solomon

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DonGorgon said:
right so this wont work at a bar with 50 men to each woman unless you are one of the most attractive there..

Yes, but remember she may be attracted to the guy who looks like Mcloving then Patrick Dempsey, every women is differen't because Patrick could be an ******* or have no game at all, and Mcloving had her cracking up, and all that

Just look @ Meehow, he does it all the time(hell i've seen vids of Meehow making out with chicks with their "boyfriends' standing there, and the guy is ugly as hell, but he can game with the best of them)....
 

aleigh

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Okay, I registered on this site just because I had to respond to this thread. I'm a chick, and I have to say, tactics like these will only work on women with low self-esteem/self-worth.

Women who are attracted to men who play games, are women with low self-esteem. If you try playing games with a woman who knows, and values herself, she won't want any part of it-- it won't matter how interested she was in you!

I may have been really interested in you in the beginning, but if you start ignoring me, or switching gears, your actions aren't in line with your words, I'll take these as signals that you lack a genuine interest.

Sincerity goes a long way in attracting a quality woman.
 

Purefilth

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aleigh said:
Okay, I registered on this site just because I had to respond to this thread. I'm a chick, and I have to say, tactics like these will only work on women with low self-esteem/self-worth.

Women who are attracted to men who play games, are women with low self-esteem. If you try playing games with a woman who knows, and values herself, she won't want any part of it-- it won't matter how interested she was in you!

I may have been really interested in you in the beginning, but if you start ignoring me, or switching gears, your actions aren't in line with your words, I'll take these as signals that you lack a genuine interest.

Sincerity goes a long way in attracting a quality woman.
this thread is over 4 years old, how deep have you been digging?:D
 

handle

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This is something I've always been "good" at and my friends will never understand. I'm an aloof dude. I don't really try to get girls. I just get to know them if they're interesting to me, but I have other people to see and things to do.

I wouldn't say you have to ignore girls, but just be aware that 90% of guys around you are giving an uncomfortable amount of attention. I don't know about you but I don't like it when girls are calling me constantly, texting me, wanting to hang out all the time without knowing me well. It freaks me out. I think it goes both ways -- why would any reasonable, busy person want you to be all up in their face?
 

Sumeet666

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There's a girl call Andrea and I used to have crush on her 3 years ago but she rejected me so I stopped talking to her and now we are in same class and sitting together in class and we again start to talk to each other 3 months ago and had sex twice 2 months ago and after it we became very close friends we used touch each other in lesson times and later she start to ignore me and I went to my home town for last month still we used to chat on Facebook and now she don't talk to me...but I want her very badly!!! What should I do!!! Please help me!!
 

El Payaso

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aleigh said:
Sincerity goes a long way in attracting a quality woman.
LMFAO!!! :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:
 

teddy

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stubbornlights said:
I think the heart of the phenomenon lies in that sentence.
Everybody else has really covered it, and understands it, but it could be simplified further. In my experience, the two things at work here are...

INDIFFERENCE & AMBIGUITY
When you demonstrate no active interest in the outcome of your interactions, you convey a certain mystery, something that makes her restless. She can't pin down what your motives are, or even if you are seriously interested in her.

Females like to be the ones playing the games. They like to manipulate guys, putting them through various routines to analyze their behavior and determine whether or not they are of any interest. As men, if we want to be in control of the situation, we must be immune to this.

Alternate signs of interest and attraction with moments of sheer indifference. It will mess with her mind sooo much that she'll be forced to think about you constantly, trying to deconstruct you, to decipher your actions. This is good. The more you're on her mind, the better.

For women less inundated with hordes of men, it seems so much easier to run a normal seduction. I find that playing indifferent and ambiguous with them just complicates the interaction; I've had times when I've done this with girls, and they've completely given up on me, and weeks later, their friends will come up to me and confess that she was really into me, but felt like I was out of her league or didn't like her. Ooops. Lesson learned.

I definitely think this works best on the hotter chicks (9+). With them, assuming you've developed a modicum of rapport and can demonstrate shared interests, some form of basic connection, whatever, it almost feels easier, in my experience anyways, to act like this and to remove yourself from the pools of suitors that she's victim to. Make HER court you.

Any thoughts?
I don't know. It's easy for people to look at "ambiguous and indifference" and then not do anything at all. Hell, that's what I had been doing my whole life--just caring about other stuff other than women--and it never got me anywhere.

I think there has to be attraction first.
 

VladPatton

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This technique works ONLY if there is attraction first and foremost. If she doesn't care for you you can go ghost for 5 years and she won't give a $hit.
 

PlayHer Man

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Everyone should keep in mind that NC and lack of attention are not supposed to be gimmicks. They are supposed to forms of time management --> A way to avoid wasting your time on things that are not worthy of your time.

NC is for women who blew it with you. Its not to get a woman back.

Ignoring a woman is for avoiding stupidity and unnecessary drama. If she want's to act stupid you have better things to do. When she returns to reasonable behavior she can have your attention again.

Its true that most men are overly responsive to women when it comes to giving attention. Just watch any HB9 or HB10 approach your average beta fag to ask a question or favor. Its like a boss-employee relationship. :crackup: :crackup:
 

fuko2007

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This could always backfire on you to, so you must be ready for that. If she is the vengefull type she might say f*** him and go get some new D and throw that in your face. And unless you are totally emotionally detached that will get to you. And sometimes people get busy and what seems like a low IL could be due to stress from work, school or family. So if you go into ignore mode you could be pushing her away. Not trying to sound like a whiteknight here but if she is intrested in you already and you have gotten the P from her then show her some attention and intrest back. Im not saying go into orbiter phase and go 24/7 calling and texting but everyother day is fine for a call or message, if she isnt alrady getting in touch with you. Its all about the right ammount of contact and being your own person guys.

Do your own thing but dont ignore them, women pick up very quickly on guys who have options and especially guys with options who are active and always on the go. So next time you find yourself thinking a girl has low IL or whatever look at what is going on behind the scene's with her. She might have some orbiters or she might have some other issues going on.
 

Maximus Rex

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Rex is Proven Right

All this does is prove correct as to what Rex was talking about in his, "When to Lie to a Chick," thread, http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=211700 and Harry Wilington's podcast, "Episode 114: Is It OK to Tell a Girl You’re Seeing Other Women? (A Personal Story)." http://www.stoplosingwomen.com/

Women simply do better and try harder when they're know, (or think,) that they're competing for you affections.
 

Childofthecorn89

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This helped me a lot as a woman... Hahaha I have liked this guy for a really long time and he's SO sweet to me we get along great, talk about everything when I do go see him...But I can't stand that he ignores me for periods of time, and just when I'm about to give up, or think he's just not that into me, he talks to me, or I end up seeing him, and I fall right back into puppy love. I have a lot of guys who do like me a lot, but I am so stuck to this guy and I think it is because he's the only one out of so many guys who is respectful of me, and isn't breathing down my neck (although I would LOVE for that to be happening... if you know what I'm saying) but he's going through some stuff and isn't in a place to be dating, and he does go on spurts where he ignores me, and it does keep me on my toes wondering WTF is going on. I am even willing to wait for him to be ready, and not give up on what we could have too, and I think it's because he's doing this exact thing. I actually understand what he's doing now, or it seems like this is what he's doing. I respect that, and I respect his space too. This is true though, I have had so many guys all over me, and he's the only one I want because he's doing something so much differently. But come on guys, help me out what do I do while we're in this stage, because it almost is painful, because I want to be so close to him, but he's not ready, and I don't want to cross boundaries and disrespect that space he gives us, if it's for other reasons too.
 

usernamedox11

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magickarl said:
^

I think a lot of the first line of my post was lost in translation:

"This only works if you already know the woman and see her pretty regularly"

I had been sleeping with this girl for two months, so there was already clear interest established between us both. The whole point of this was to show her that my time is a premium, and that I will not be expected to wait hand and foot on her. Also, I wanted to present the subtle message that my time is not a given, and she will have to compete and prove to me that my time is worth spending with her.

It places a higher value on me, and gives her a challenge at the same time.

BTW --- She was an HB8 - HB9. Not a perfect dime piece, but damned close.
Guys throw out HB8 ratings like it's nothing. Girl is probably a 6 at best. I've only seen a handful of 9s in person, but I guess I just look at more aesthetically than the average guy (hair length/style/color/texture, eye size and color, nails, weird veins/marks on skin, teeth, overall body proportion, facial structure, proportion of head to body, softness and color of skin, etc)
 

goldengoose

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Then when you start hanging out with her again her interest will go back down to 0.

When her interest level is low you are doing something wrong. Ignoring her isn't some magical fix that will solve your all problems.
 

usernamedox11

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goldengoose said:
Then when you start hanging out with her again her interest will go back down to 0.

When her interest level is low you are doing something wrong. Ignoring her isn't some magical fix that will solve your all problems.

Why is it always something the guy might've done wrong? Maybe he's just not the girl's type?
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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