How to put the spark back into a LTR

happyman2012

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 30, 2012
Messages
95
Reaction score
0
Me and my girlfriend have been going out for about a year and a half.

Long story short we have spent alot of time together (probably an issue), and she is the type of girl who always wants to see me. Always! Gives off big signs of still being interested plenty of sex, sex drive, ringing me straight after work texting me, everything.

HOWEVER

Both me and her have kinda realised and said that the "spark" has gone out of the relationship a little and I told her that my attraction for her has gone down because she dosent make an effort with herself as much anymore. Also told her that she intrudes on my personal space and dosent respect my boundaries when it comes to having time to myself. Said we should have a few days apart to take care of our own business.

I did no contact for a few days to see how she reacted after our convo and she must of called me 30 times and text and still wants to go on a trip we planned (not on holiday or anything) and says she is going to make more of an effort with her apperance, respect my boundaries and just wants to sort it e.t.c.

She still claims to be attracted to me and the signs show she is - she says that she wants to spend quality time together and do stuff, as opposed to our current relationship lul and not doing much.

Am I right in thinking that this is a common part of LTR and is fixable if both of us shape up and break out of it?

And if so, how? By limiting contact and not seeing as much of each other and by doing more fun things?
 
Joined
Jan 5, 2014
Messages
876
Reaction score
11
id like to know this too so relationships I begin going into don't get stale or repetitive or habitual.
 

Dgwizdal

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 12, 2013
Messages
761
Reaction score
148
Location
Playpen, Chicago.
Sounds like you caught it early which is a good thing and you are feeling the brunt of boredom...

Just back off, don't be so available, skip responding to her texts every now and then, let her wonder a little bit about what your up to, cause a little drama...

Get a haircut, new clothes, new hobby, get swole, tease her, be a little bit more of a jerk, give her some hoops to jump thru. Make her invest emotionally into the game.

Ex: don't talk or respond to her for a day, then text her "you're mine tonight, wear black" and don't tell her anything about where you're going or what you're doing. Chicks love anticipation and suspense.

Most importantly: Game her like you would a new chick....forever.

http://www.rooshv.com/top-15-game-tips-for-long-term-relationships
 

happyman2012

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 30, 2012
Messages
95
Reaction score
0
Yeah I get ya.

She shows all these signs of high interest still:

-She always calls you to hang out.
-She calls/text you wondering what your doing.
-She does whatever you want to do.
-She tells you she loves you first and when casually seeing you.
-She talks about future plans with you.
-She always wants to be by your side.
-She will offer to buy you something.
-She tells good things about you around people.
-She cares about choices you make.
-She always wants you to go places with her.
-Asks for your opinion.
-Helps you do stuff / Do stuff for you.
-Takes care of you when needed.
-Compliments your looks.
-She communicates with you to solve a problem with the relationship.
-She respects your decisions
-She will stand up for you if needed.
-Is affectionate around you and other people.
-She wants you to meet all her friends and family.
-She is happy to see you.
-She is in a good mood around you (mostly)

So what I have done and will continue to keep doing is:
go back to how I was at the start of the relationship
not seeing as much of her,
doing other things,
doing fun things when we see each other
getting her to do more for me and leaving if she acts up

I also asked her to buy me some clothes and some bits and bats for her house, so I have clothes there when I go. She said thats fine and we will go pick out what I want at the weekend!
 
Top