About 75% of the world's population quivers at the prospect of striking up
conversations with a stranger. The reason? Shyness.
Shyness can be attributed to cultural factors. Being raised in conservative
environments or living in harsh communes makes people timid. Having
critical friends and domineering colleagues can further aggravate
shyness.
Shyness can also be genetic. There's a joke that goes:
The gene for shyness has been discovered. Scientists at MIT discovered
it hiding behind a set of other genes.
Nevertheless, shyness poses a problem for those who want to persuade.
This malady prevents persuasion by aborting communication.
Your first problem: discarding that negative image of yourself. Many men
and women are critical of themselves. They feel that they are "ugly",
"dull", "boring". These devastating thought forms hinder communication!
How can you convince others otherwise if this was your mindset?
Paint a much better image of yourself!
Whatever you may feel inside, it is important to project a positive and
charming image. Your projected image is the sum total of the appearance
and personality by which you are judged by others. Your projected image
depends on the way you stand, speak, dress, smile, walk, make eye
contact.... You package yourself to others this way; and the more beautiful
the package, the more readily accepted it is. The first step to packaging
yourself properly comes from your beliefs.
Picture yourself as you want to be and project it forcefully. Believe that
you have charm, wit and confidence. Believe that you are attractive,
commanding and likeable. Day by day, your inner mental picture will take
shape and manifest itself externally. You will become who you picture
yourself to be. Eventually no effort will be necessary to maintain this
image.
Here are some techniques to bolster your image building efforts.
Use smiles like a magic wand to gain trust. Greet people in a
friendly way regardless of their attitude towards you. Remember the
principle of reciprocity? Smile at others and chances are, they'll
smile back. Frown, and people will snarl back. Take the initiative:
smile and be pleasant. In return, you'll receive wonderful reactions:
smiles, laughter, a handshake and perhaps a new friend. Life is a
chain of action and reaction. Begin everything with positive action!
l
Be presentable. Appear kept, neat and tasteful. You can wear
simple clothes, but carry yourself with dignity. Stand straight,
indulge in eye contact. Move with confidence and a sense of
purpose. Act as though you know where you're going and that you
have plans in life. To attract other winners, you must look like a
winner.
l
Be enthusiastic. Brim with life. Look alive and be alive. Make your voice ooze with enthusiasm. Immerse yourself in the situation and
enjoy it. People gravitate to exuberant souls.
Be poised. Reign in your emotions. Know what you are saying when
you say it. Be logical and calculated. Relax. Appear that nothing can
faze you.
l
Ooze charm. Be warm, friendly and sympathetic. At the onset of
conversations, try to agree with what your companion says.
Minimize criticism. Develop a sense of humor and learn to laugh. Be
upbeat! You may have a load of problems, but the world hates to
hear about it. Don't burden your companion with your anxieties.
Discuss bright ideas. Shroud yourself in optimism.
l
Empathize. Put yourself in their shoes. Grasp fully what they may be
feeling and thinking. Try to understand why they say what they do
and do what they do. Practice this skill regularly and you'll unlock
many closed doors.
l
It should take about two weeks of constructive image building before you
notice positive changes. Don't fret! The effort pays off in spades. Once
you've acquired that new image don't fall back to old habits of fading into
the background and being a negative sourpuss. You've earned that million
dollar image.
With that brand new personality, meeting new folks should be effortless.
However, there's a scientific way of finding and cementing new
relationships. It's called the FK Method, or the Find 'em and Keep 'em
technique of putting more friends in your social bank account..
For those who are still rather shy, this method of striking up conversations
and making friends will minimize the pain of approaching a stranger.
Study the following technique. Integrate it into your psyche. The rewards
you will gain will be a hundred fold more valuable than the price of this
book.
conversations with a stranger. The reason? Shyness.
Shyness can be attributed to cultural factors. Being raised in conservative
environments or living in harsh communes makes people timid. Having
critical friends and domineering colleagues can further aggravate
shyness.
Shyness can also be genetic. There's a joke that goes:
The gene for shyness has been discovered. Scientists at MIT discovered
it hiding behind a set of other genes.
Nevertheless, shyness poses a problem for those who want to persuade.
This malady prevents persuasion by aborting communication.
Your first problem: discarding that negative image of yourself. Many men
and women are critical of themselves. They feel that they are "ugly",
"dull", "boring". These devastating thought forms hinder communication!
How can you convince others otherwise if this was your mindset?
Paint a much better image of yourself!
Whatever you may feel inside, it is important to project a positive and
charming image. Your projected image is the sum total of the appearance
and personality by which you are judged by others. Your projected image
depends on the way you stand, speak, dress, smile, walk, make eye
contact.... You package yourself to others this way; and the more beautiful
the package, the more readily accepted it is. The first step to packaging
yourself properly comes from your beliefs.
Picture yourself as you want to be and project it forcefully. Believe that
you have charm, wit and confidence. Believe that you are attractive,
commanding and likeable. Day by day, your inner mental picture will take
shape and manifest itself externally. You will become who you picture
yourself to be. Eventually no effort will be necessary to maintain this
image.
Here are some techniques to bolster your image building efforts.
Use smiles like a magic wand to gain trust. Greet people in a
friendly way regardless of their attitude towards you. Remember the
principle of reciprocity? Smile at others and chances are, they'll
smile back. Frown, and people will snarl back. Take the initiative:
smile and be pleasant. In return, you'll receive wonderful reactions:
smiles, laughter, a handshake and perhaps a new friend. Life is a
chain of action and reaction. Begin everything with positive action!
l
Be presentable. Appear kept, neat and tasteful. You can wear
simple clothes, but carry yourself with dignity. Stand straight,
indulge in eye contact. Move with confidence and a sense of
purpose. Act as though you know where you're going and that you
have plans in life. To attract other winners, you must look like a
winner.
l
Be enthusiastic. Brim with life. Look alive and be alive. Make your voice ooze with enthusiasm. Immerse yourself in the situation and
enjoy it. People gravitate to exuberant souls.
Be poised. Reign in your emotions. Know what you are saying when
you say it. Be logical and calculated. Relax. Appear that nothing can
faze you.
l
Ooze charm. Be warm, friendly and sympathetic. At the onset of
conversations, try to agree with what your companion says.
Minimize criticism. Develop a sense of humor and learn to laugh. Be
upbeat! You may have a load of problems, but the world hates to
hear about it. Don't burden your companion with your anxieties.
Discuss bright ideas. Shroud yourself in optimism.
l
Empathize. Put yourself in their shoes. Grasp fully what they may be
feeling and thinking. Try to understand why they say what they do
and do what they do. Practice this skill regularly and you'll unlock
many closed doors.
l
It should take about two weeks of constructive image building before you
notice positive changes. Don't fret! The effort pays off in spades. Once
you've acquired that new image don't fall back to old habits of fading into
the background and being a negative sourpuss. You've earned that million
dollar image.
With that brand new personality, meeting new folks should be effortless.
However, there's a scientific way of finding and cementing new
relationships. It's called the FK Method, or the Find 'em and Keep 'em
technique of putting more friends in your social bank account..
For those who are still rather shy, this method of striking up conversations
and making friends will minimize the pain of approaching a stranger.
Study the following technique. Integrate it into your psyche. The rewards
you will gain will be a hundred fold more valuable than the price of this
book.