how to number close without getting "WHY?"

[Delta]

howdy,

so i've actually been really pretty good at approaching and meeting without thought and even trying closes but my closes usually go like this,

"hey, i really liked talking to you. let's go out sometime.... (or - want to go out sometime?)"

i'm being very up front. maybe i shouldn't?

i've thought about how i could put "let me give you a call sometime." and it just sounds too ridiculous and artificial for me. anyone have a good way of putting it?

basically, asking for the number and implying what is to follow without sounding ridiculous or having them ask "why do you want my number?"

thanks

delta

p.s. all shot down so far - 2 said they had boyfriends, 1 was a lesbian, (hahaha... she might've been lying but i never got that before... the only rejection that ever put a broad genuine smile on my face), most, i didn't close cause they weren't goin' for it.

 

[specialed]

"well you are sexy and a good conversationalist...i'm free thursday, lets get coffee."

she responds

*hand phone to her she puts number in*

"this your direct line?"

...you know the rest.

if she says why...just laugh...cuz she's dumb.

 

[SharinganUser]

Dude NEVER SAY SOMETIME!! That for various reasons will not get you anywhere. You HAVE TO be time specific. Say "Listen, I am busy thursday, but I can give you a call in the evening, and we can go to lunch friday." Something like that.

And if they ask why, just say to use your imagination. Then it's like you are putting a thought in their head.

 

[unorthodox]

Girls do not ask why you want to know their number. :nono: They do however, give out fake numbers, too dorks. Women have many different reasons for giving out their phone numbers. Some love many men calling them, some like to turn guys down, some are interested. They also act different on the phone than in person when you met them. Stop concentrating on the phone number, and get her email instead. Emails are answered more often than phones.

After you done talking to a girl:

YOU: Well, it was nice meeting you. I’m going to get back to
my friends.
(then just as you turning to walk away and disconnect with her)
YOU: Do you have email?

If she says yes, take out pen and paper and have them write it down. Treat the yes that they give you as a yes to get it from them as well. Then as she writing her email, say "Write your number down there too." If she says no, bust her nuts, ask her "Well, do you have elecricity?" ......after that say "Well, OK then… I like email better, but I’ll take your regular phone number… it’s so damn hard to reach people on the phone these days."

Then as she writing her number down say "Is this a number that you actually answer?" If not (read her body language), say "Look, write your real number down… it’s going to be OK, I’ll only call you nine times a day." She should laugh and give you her number, or else she's retarded, or you need a tad bit more practice with this.

 

[Jackman]

I don't recall a women specifically asking why I would want her number, since the answer to that question is pretty damn obvious.

But I have gotten simular 'obvious answer' questions which I normally see as a good thing. Typically, when a woman asks a question with an obvious answer like that, it means she wants to see if you can openly discuss attraction/interest. She is essentially testing/flirting.

The only time I wouldn't see it this way is if she were an angry lesbian who wanted to make a man look like a pig. Of course, I would assume you'd pick up on that pretty quickly. Long before you would think of hitting up such a kunt for her number.

Anyway, "why" is not something you have to try to avoid here. Just respond to obvious questions like that with a little humor. It's the easiest and most productive way to go about it.

 

[d9930380]

The problem you have is sub-consciously thinking why would this women want to give me her number. You have confidence issues. Once you realise that and correct that you won't be expecting her to ask you why!

 

[Rata Blanca]

dont ask the phone number...
just say "how can I get in contact with you?
if she asks why just tell her it was nice meeting her yada yada

 

[PRMoon]

I have to continue to preach the principle and concept of the number exchange until someone realized that this is how it should be done 90% of the time.

When you want to get a girls number you say "We should EXCHANGE numbers" or something to that effect where you will both have each others numbers. This is assuming that the girl has a cell phone (honestly who doesn't have a cell phone in this day an age, you've got to be living under a rock). When you're getting a number, and it's not someone you're already aquainted with and you want to be sure you're not getting a fake number, get the girl to put her number into your phone then call her immeadeately "Now you have my number." Save her number and you know it's hers because you just saw her phone ring and watch her save yours.

You can also say "We should exchange numbers, but I left my cell phone in my car here lemmie call it" Then call yourself from her phone. Unless the number's private her number will be on your phone and obviously she now has your number. Watch her save it and save her number in your phone when you get back to your car or if it's in your pocket but you just wanted to go this route.

You'll never get a fake number this way and you'll know who is calling you all the time. Obviously if the girl has a boyfriend or is a lesbian then this may not work because usually signficant others don't want their other half giving out numbers to the oppositie sex and there's very little you can offer lesbians anyway. Why a girl would ask you "why do you want my number?" and is single is beyond me. That sounds like a stupidity flaw on her part or maybe you didn't lay down good enough game when you were flirting with her previously.

 

[Delta]

thanks fellows, the posts here run the gamut of all the thoughts i had about this subject.

right, it does seem like the "meaning" of asking for her number is implicit... but just like the girls that i meet in the mall and book stores and on the street do not ever seem to try to make eye contact (with ANYONE), so it seems that most are not as hip to the "game" as we might hope or imagine.

also, in as much as it is personal bit of information, they can come back and say something "safety related" like i don't like to give my personal number to strangers.... and at that point, we're left in a bad place.

i agree that this "implicit" and oblique manner of approaching is BEST IN THEORY but in the real world, i keep running into everyone not being very good at it.

sharinganuser,

THANKS! that sounds like really good advice... the sometime sounds indecisive and noncommital... be specific. but that does add a level of PRESSURE, as in immediate, specific, pressure. and in the pick ups i've been trying (mall and book store), it seems inappropriate to the casual mood. what do you think?


prmoon,

what's the point in pressing the issue? i saw a guy do just this thing the other day and it struck me as bizarre. if she WANTS to give me her number, she will. if she DOESN'T want to give me her number, why am i manipulating her so that it's impossible for her NOT to give me the right number?

i don't get that at all.

thanks fellows.

delta

 

[PRMoon]

You're not pressing the issue, you're just making it less of a question, more of a statment and also making the move at the appropriate time. When conducting a number exchange you should do so on a positive note ie you've built repore and established that the girl is into you. The exchange is like an insurance policy and when done right goes down smoothly and works in many (if not all) circumstances. It also puts you in a position of power because you established dominance by careful instruction and command.

The benifts of doing an exchange as opposed to having her write it down or vice versa are to numerous to list here. The only condition is you have to have your wits about you and know whether or not the girl is interested in you. For me that's not too much of an issue as my senses of the social world are well refined through exposeure and expirence. For others an exchange may seemed ultra forced and unrelaxed because they haven't conducted themselves well prior to the act or are clunky in the execution. All I can say for people in those situations is practice and review makes all the differance.