How to keep a woman around

[Glassguy]

Its a very simple process. It doesnt matter if you are trying to keep one woman around or spin a 4 chick rotation:

1.) Be the best version of yourself: You have to constantly be working on YOU. Gym, eating habits, social skills, getting out and meeting new people. YOU are your purpose. Its a never ending grind. You will ultimately have more options as the byproduct to your success in self betterment. 90% of the people on this board will never achieve this because they are either lazy, not self motivated or they will keep looking for that special pill that you can take for instant results (that doesnt exist btw).

If you and your chick/chicks were both 8's when you got together and 6 months later she becomes a fat and lazy bytch (lets say she is a 6 at that point), you are dumping her. Especially if you are now a 9 because you've been working on yourself.

Same goes for you guys who get COMFORTABLE in a "relationship" and go from a 9 to a 7 because you get fat. Meanwhile your girl was an 8 and she busts her @ss on the treadmill everyday and becomes a 9.....she is dumping your @ss.

Whoever has the best options waiting in line will move on if those options become better than what they currently have in the relationship.

Constant self improvement is a must.

2.) Options: Self betterment = more options. No matter how you slice it, youd better make sure that your girl or girls know that you have people in line wanting to date you. They need to understand that disrespectful attitudes will not be allowed and you will go to your next option. Profit is good in business and options are good in dating. While not always spoken, competition is a good thing in ALL of life.

3.) Maintain frame: If something doesnt benefit you but you always do it anyway, if something is being expected out of you because "you're just such a nice guy", you are being taken advantage of, etc., you need to seriously look in the mirror and evaluate your frame. Simply put, if you are making decision and doing things that BENEFIT you, your frame is in check. If you do something nice for someone its because you want to (again it benefits you because you feel better about yourself for doing it). If you are EXPECTED to do something nice for a chick but there is no benefit to you for doing it, dont be afraid to say so.

The word "NO" is not a dirty word. You should be telling your woman/women NO occasionally. Nice guys say YES to every request. Men who spin plates well say NO when it doesnt benefit them.

4.) Your attitude: Your attitude should be-

-I like hanging out with you but still need more time to get to know you
-I like being with you but need a little more time to make sure I am ready for a relationship
-We seem to be doing good but need a little more time to make sure this is right before we get too serious
-Things seem to be good now but I just want to make sure that we are a great fit before......

You get the message. Keep them WORKING for you. The minute they "HAVE YOU", whether it be in a month, 3 months, whatever.......they will lose interest to a point because they will second guess why they can now have you so EASILY.

As the late but great Woody Hayes used to say: Anything that comes easy isnt worth a d@mn!

Stay mysterious, stay wanted by other women, keep them chasing. Put that carrot out in front of them and sit back and let them come to you.

 

[Julian]

really good post here. i needed this message today. I rekindled the flame with this chick from over a decade ago. she is still fine. we both kind of skipped the games and BS and bonded fairly quick and were smashing multiple times a week for the last month. ive been a little too available and actually stopped talking to other chicks. bad sign. im refocusing myself on my projects that are going to elevate me out of my dayjob. going to have to play the game afterall as much as i want to get away from it. thats why this post you made is a great reminder that we cant let our ideas delude us into ignoring reality.

 

[Epic Days]

Withold your validation

 

[soulforge]

Excellent post Glass guy!

On the subject of availability, what do you think of this ratio?

Weekend One - Date and Smash
Weekend Two - Date and Smash
Weekend Three - Sorry too busy to meet this Weekend

Weekend Four - Date and Smash

Repeat the cycle month after month... At this rate, you are letting her down once a month and becoming less available.

Also you are spot on about giving a chick a relationship too soon... I am guilty of that in past.

You really do have to make them work for it, or they will not appreciate you and lose interest.

 

[HOOVERMEBABY]

I think NWA said it best in the song..”Findum,Fvckum and flee”

 

[Glassguy]

Excellent post Glass guy!

On the subject of availability, what do you think of this ratio?

Weekend One - Date and Smash
Weekend Two - Date and Smash
Weekend Three - Sorry too busy to meet this Weekend

Weekend Four - Date and Smash

Repeat the cycle month after month... At this rate, you are letting her down once a month and becoming less available.

Also you are spot on about giving a chick a relationship too soon... I am guilty of that in past.

You really do have to make them work for it, or they will not appreciate you and lose interest.

You are totally correct but I think its an individual based thing because you might have high value and be able to get away with this while others have low value (especially compared to the chick) and not get away with it.

I am not a fan of the mental fvcking game. I am a fan of not being easily available all the time. Probably once every 10-14 is what I typically do in the first month as far as "dates". If smashing, I might ask them to come over to hang out in between that time but they never stay over night.

I think for the first month you should not see a chick more than once a week. Ever. In the second month maybe once a week or have her stop by to smash more often.

The key is to not give the impression that she has you.
AMS had a good saying in a video. If you want to see her all the time early on, what has she done to earn that from you? Just because she met the minimum requirement and showed up for a date looking good? Hell naw. Make her continue to work for your time and attention.

After all, thats the only way your time and attention will remain valuable in her eyes.

 

[Rodrigo]

On the subject of availability, what do you think of this ratio?

Weekend One - Date and Smash
Weekend Two - Date and Smash
Weekend Three - Sorry too busy to meet this Weekend

Weekend Four - Date and Smash

Should be working fine for a FWB type of dynamics, however not sure if it is okay for a legit relationship pattern.

Repeat the cycle month after month... At this rate, you are letting her down once a month and becoming less available.

Yeah, right..probably if you are an 8 guy and she is 3-5. Honestly, how long do you think she'll be okay with that little date&smash tactics of yours, provided she's a pretty girl (i.e will have options and tons of orbiters, some of them maybe just as alpha as you) and even if she is really very attracted to you?

Let's try to shift away from the red-pill matter for a minute and view things from a more real-life and practical prospective with a couple of example scenarios, depending on the type of girl you're dealing with:

scenario 1) at the beginning she's gonna enjoy chasing you and try to pin you down with the idea of pushing you in a relationship but eventually she'll get tired and frustrated over time if you keep making yourself that scarce and will:
a) move on to a more available and relationship-oriented dude.
b) not mind keeping some FWB status with you, which will work for you pretty well, exception being that she might not always be available according to your own schedule, so she might start skipping weekend smash dates with you herself;

scenario 2) both of you keep yourselves as mutual plates which - from a logical standpoint - is just awesome, however both should clear things out from the very beginning, i.e no one will work towards exclusiveness, which on the other hand will definitely benefit you enough but can't tell for how long she'll be happy with this. I myself - as a man - can't tell that I've felt pretty complete over a large period of time, knowing that I'm a plate. It's like being good enough to participate in the core of the team, but not that top-notch in your coach's eyes to always pick you as a first option and undisputed starter, leading to yourself having to remain on the bench or substituted mid-game here and there.

You really do have to make them work for it, or they will not appreciate you and lose interest.

Alright, that's correct but timing is very important. Let's not underestimate women so much. As much as they often tend to function off of their pure instincts and emotions triggered in them, you can't count that it's going to last forever, especially if talking about a good-looking woman with enough options herself. Eventually, you will either have to "give" her the relationship status (let's assume she will have worked enough to earn it) and then start working your ass off for a healthy relationship or just let her go and move on to the next chick.

By the way, if you guys have indeed objectively screened a particular girl as a dating material and she checks most of the boxes on your list and you find her a keeper, why not work together towards starting and maintaining a healthy relationship, instead of trying to bag the next girl that will most likely be like the other 90% of the women around i.e mostly just bangworthy? Yeah, probably it's not quite a DJ or a red-pill mindset, but on the other hand - if you've honestly encountered something decent, why not try to stick to it and work to keep it as long as possible?

 

[Spaz]

Glasses, I'm in agreement with point 1-3 and couldn't stress enough the importance of it for every man here.

No. 4, here we differ, perhaps its style, perhaps its frame but it's all good too.

My attitude = me, myself and I.

Which is mostly tied to how a woman or plate amuses me. And all my plates knows I'm dating another woman.

Generally speaking, may the best woman win!

 

[zekko]

You get the message. Keep them WORKING for you. The minute they "HAVE YOU", whether it be in a month, 3 months, whatever.......they will lose interest to a point because they will second guess why they can now have you so EASILY.

Like some others, I have some issues with this. A girl like this is not a good prospect for a LTR. If they lose interest in you because you acknowledge them as a girlfriend, wife, or whatever... That is as big a red flag as you can get. If they're like that, I would rather find out sooner rather than later. You need to find someone who is on the more stable side of the spectrum.

At some point in a relationship, you have to stop running. Otherwise, there is no relationship.

 

[Epic Days]

If they lose interest in you because you acknowledge them as a girlfriend, wife, or whatever... That is as big a red flag as you can get.

I’m following. So what is the opposite of this? Im just curious as to what it would be.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I’m following. So what is the opposite of this? Im just curious as to what it would be.

Zero ****s given. Enjoy the decline. Hedonism on steroids lulz!

I spin plates. I smash rotten or i strike out miserably. Its sport. Winner takes all.

The behaviour is self evident. Obv, display attractive and alpha behaviour. Have options and willingness to walk.

Again, after a decade +/- of pickup, the verdict is that women are women. There's no trying to understand or use reason and rational with female nature. Women are hardwired by hypergamy which is encoded in her genes.

Women cuck and crater SMV. Ski down cawk mountain. She checks out of SMP due to inability to compete and or placing her bet on the best she could have. Again, hypergamy dictates women behavior. Thst being, waiting at the finish line and ****kkk the winners.

Zero ****s given to her staying or going.

New girls are turning 18 19 20 21 every day.

Its beta cuck provider and retards gambling on epiphany phase after best yrs are done. Its marrying *****s or sluts.

Women check out on a marriage, cuck, and seek cash and prizes. The pushback being, girls turning 18 at midnight until the end of time. The laws combat this upgrade but retards play house.

There's no better time then now to be a bachelor.

 

[Epic Days]

Zero ****s given. Enjoy the decline. Hedonism on steroids lulz!

I spin plates. I smash rotten or i strike out miserably. Its sport. Winner takes all.

The behaviour is self evident. Obv, display attractive and alpha behaviour. Have options and willingness to walk.

Again, after a decade +/- of pickup, the verdict is that women are women. There's no trying to understand or use reason and rational with female nature. Women are hardwired by hypergamy which is encoded in her genes.

Women cuck and crater SMV. Ski down cawk mountain. She checks out of SMP due to inability to compete and or placing her bet on the best she could have. Again, hypergamy dictates women behavior. Thst being, waiting at the finish line and ****kkk the winners.

Zero ****s given to her staying or going.

New girls are turning 18 19 20 21 every day.

Its beta cuck provider and retards gambling on epiphany phase after best yrs are done. Its marrying *****s or sluts.

Women check out on a marriage, cuck, and seek cash and prizes. The pushback being, girls turning 18 at midnight until the end of time. The laws combat this upgrade but retards play house.

There's no better time then now to be a bachelor.

We agree. Lol
Obviously there is no opposite to “validating her and she looses interest”. Validate her and she’s no longer interested in a procreation frame or situation.

I’ve rationed it before but then broke rapport soon after. She must ALWAYS have to prove herself. She will follow. Panties will come off.
She will never “feel” alive if you validate her.
Then smash it!!! That’s why she’s there. She’s not there to play checkers or rummy.

I believe that’s called validation sex? It’s way better sex.

 

[soulforge]

Like some others, I have some issues with this. A girl like this is not a good prospect for a LTR. If they lose interest in you because you acknowledge them as a girlfriend, wife, or whatever... That is as big a red flag as you can get. If they're like that, I would rather find out sooner rather than later. You need to find someone who is on the more stable side of the spectrum.

At some point in a relationship, you have to stop running. Otherwise, there is no relationship.

This is a valid point.. Lets say you dated a chick for 4 months... After four months you gave her exclusivity or GF status..

She loses interest? Isn't that a bullet dodged?

Heck I would say, give her GF status a little sooner than later, just to see what type of chick you are dealing with.

I'm all about making a chick work for GF status, however its about balance too.

Game her too hard.. A chick with options is GONE

 

[soulforge]

If you're seeing a chick only on weekends, isn't that limited availability as it is?

I mean making yourself even LESS available, would mean seeing her once every TWO weeks... That means zero intamicy or sexual connection for quite a long period time.

Isn't there a risk of her losing interest simply because of the lack of the sexual connection.

Maybe she has options who are more available.

 

[SoSuave666]

If you're seeing a chick only on weekends, isn't that limited availability as it is?

I mean making yourself even LESS available, would mean seeing her once every TWO weeks... That means zero intamicy or sexual connection for quite a long period time.

Isn't there a risk of her losing interest simply because of the lack of the sexual connection.

Maybe she has options who are more available.

I typically don’t see a new girl on weekends. It takes months for that to happen usually. It’s not that I actively don’t want to see her, but I’d rather spend time with my friends shooting the **** or doing some adventure. Typically inside the first six months it’s one or two dates a week, and maybe we have hung out max three times on a weekend.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

We agree. Lol
Obviously there is no opposite to “validating her and she looses interest”. Validate her and she’s no longer interested in a procreation frame or situation.

I’ve rationed it before but then broke rapport soon after. She must ALWAYS have to prove herself. She will follow. Panties will come off.
She will never “feel” alive if you validate her.
Then smash it!!! That’s why she’s there. She’s not there to play checkers or rummy.

I believe that’s called validation sex? It’s way better sex.

Its comical once Unplugged and seeing the traps. If you get the girl, you are essentially a atm given women's predisposition to squander resources both financially and her SMV. LTR and marriage equates to squander and bulking season on her part. Guys actually play house and risk the farm for star fish sex once a month. Its pathetic. The willingness to walk us GOAT STATUS. I don't mean to be threatening to leave. Rollo is bang on here.

RationalMale
Demonstrate, do not explicate

Its one thing for women to **** test because she's needy, insecure, and needs reminder that I'm 'that guy.' Disrespect or ambiguity is unacceptable and I would do my Houdini disappearing act effective immediately without a single afterthought.

There's no better time for a bachelor than the present.

 

[Epic Days]

Its comical once Unplugged and seeing the traps. If you get the girl, you are essentially a atm given women's predisposition to squander resources both financially and her SMV. LTR and marriage equates to squander and bulking season on her part. Guys actually play house and risk the farm for star fish sex once a month. Its pathetic. The willingness to walk us GOAT STATUS. I don't mean to be threatening to leave. Rollo is bang on here.



Its one thing for women to **** test because she's needy, insecure, and needs reminder that I'm 'that guy.' Disrespect or ambiguity is unacceptable and I would do my Houdini disappearing act effective immediately without a single afterthought.

There's no better time for a bachelor than the present.

Especially the “ambiguity” Fvck, that is such a manipulation. She wants to see if you will dance for her. Validating herself because she can get a full grown man to do the dancing chicken.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

If you're seeing a chick only on weekends, isn't that limited availability as it is?

I mean making yourself even LESS available, would mean seeing her once every TWO weeks... That means zero intamicy or sexual connection for quite a long period time.

Isn't there a risk of her losing interest simply because of the lack of the sexual connection.

Maybe she has options who are more available.

Its once a week and usually a week day. Weekends are free for lead acquisition and generating new prospects. If it goes two weeks, it diminishing the attraction imho unless super high interest. Ten days usually inputs that dread game vibe. The morning comes early which acts as a legit time restrain. She could be giving up the ass, once its time to go, i pull the chute. No exceptions. I could be in mid pump. As for zero intimacy, LMR and low sex drive means#next!

 

[Glassguy]

Like some others, I have some issues with this. A girl like this is not a good prospect for a LTR. If they lose interest in you because you acknowledge them as a girlfriend, wife, or whatever... That is as big a red flag as you can get. If they're like that, I would rather find out sooner rather than later. You need to find someone who is on the more stable side of the spectrum.

At some point in a relationship, you have to stop running. Otherwise, there is no relationship.

#1 I am not LOOKING for a relationship. I am managing a rotation. There is an enormous different to intent and structure of how I operate.

In order for me to ditch a perfectly good rotation (which I would possibly do) one chick would have to be an absolute unicorn. I am smart enough to give thought to such a thing if the chick just had the right personality, motivation, career, social skills, etc.

I will say that most women in my rotation fit MOST of my desires but what they lack is glaring to me. So that is why I spin them as plates instead of pursuing a relationship. My standards are high and I do NOT need a relationship to be happy.

Men enter a relationship for 2 reasons:

1.) They FINALLY find someone interested in their unhappy @ss and they feel the need to latch on to that chick due to a scarcity mindset.

2.) They find a chick who is worth (to them) to move forward with and eliminate the conversations, dates, hooking up, etc with the other women.

I am not saying there is a right thing to do or a wrong thing to do. It is about preference on what the man wants and clearly is defined (or should be) on what the woman offers.

I am not going to walk past a $100 bill to pick up a $5. Dating is the same way. There are very very few people in this world that offer what we are looking for as a whole to be able to move into a successful relationship with. Yet there are many that offer bits and pieces of what we are looking for and should be treated as such (pump and dumps, FWB, friend zone them, etc).

Yet one thing that is consistent with anything that you do is that it should always benefit YOU and you should always be putting yourself and your needs first in this game of dating.

 

[zekko]

#1 I am not LOOKING for a relationship. I am managing a rotation. There is an enormous different to intent and structure of how I operate.

You are correct that my comments are based mainly on being in a relationship. But you did say in your original post:

"It doesnt matter if you are trying to keep one woman around or spin a 4 chick rotation:"

I read that as saying that your tips applied both to LTRs and plate spinning, but perhaps I was mistaken. I didn't think the fourth point applied well to LTRs, aside from perhaps early on in an LTR. If you're going to have a relationship, you can't just keep cat string theory going forever, it destroys the whole point. At some point you have to give some trust - although I would never put 100% trust in anyone else. Because you can never fully predict what someone else is going to do, no matter who it is.