How to Hold Interest Between the First and Second Date

[housedejacques]

Hey PepperSpray, I sincerely think that girl is just hanging in there so that she can get attention and validation from you. She doesn't seem that interested. And she shouldn't be, with all that calling and texting. One of the most important things I've learned by reading pick-up -and with my limited experience- is that texts and phone calls are for setting up dates, not for chatting away for 20 minutes.

I used to hate game playing but I've come to realize that it's the only way to plow through the initial phases of a seduction. You have to show interest and not be needy. It's as complicated as that. I remember I girl I seduce a long time ago. We'd go out, have fun and then not speak for around three to four days. At which point I called her to do something and she'd always say yes. But she never initiated contact. I always did, through one lonely text/phone call. I was absolutely not invested in her, so I wasn't faking it, and I guess that's why it came through.

 

[PepperSpray]

I've been sparse with the texting/calling as per the advice on this thread. I'm not calling/texting her every other day. The texts have only came after significant no contact periods (10-12 days). The calls were made to rekindle some of that spark from the initial interaction first date.
Here's our contact history since the first date.

Oct 7 - 1st date
Oct 8 - exchange texts
Oct 11 - exchange texts, call, I ask her out, she says she'll get back to me
Oct 13 - exchange texts, says she's busy
Oct 25 - exchange texts, 20 min phone call, I don't ask her out
Nov 4 - exchange texts, 20 min phone call, I ask her out

This has been deliberate to stave off any semblance of "neediness". I may have come on too fast too strong initially so I backed off and took the no contact approach.

Yes I was prepared to write this girl off so the text/phone call on Nov 3 was a last ditch hail mary effort. She did express interest in seeing me again so we'll see where this goes.

Also I'm working on a few other girls so I'm not overly invested in this one.

 

[soshdog]

Solid advice TS. Great points and written beautifully! I think there are disadvantages to cold approach, but there are disadvantages to everything. I think there are advantages to cold approach as well (when sober, not club/bar environment.) If I step to an attractive woman at a coffee shop for example, and start a conversation in a genuine way, it shows balls and that I go for what I want, which is attractive to women. It is also flattering to them, because they want to feel attractive. It gives me the opportunity to present myself as bold, courageous, genuine, interested, and many other things.

Your advice regarding what follows the first encounter is spot on though. I try to explain this to my friends who get a chick interested and then kill the attraction by communicating too much with text and calls (text mostly.) They don't seem to understand. I will say "Just because she texted you doens't mean you have to text her right back. Wait a couple hours at least. Dang."

 

[Jeffst1980]

I've been sparse with the texting/calling as per the advice on this thread. I'm not calling/texting her every other day. The texts have only came after significant no contact periods (10-12 days). The calls were made to rekindle some of that spark from the initial interaction first date.
Here's our contact history since the first date.

Oct 7 - 1st date
Oct 8 - exchange texts
Oct 11 - exchange texts, call, I ask her out, she says she'll get back to me
Oct 13 - exchange texts, says she's busy
Oct 25 - exchange texts, 20 min phone call, I don't ask her out
Nov 4 - exchange texts, 20 min phone call, I ask her out

This has been deliberate to stave off any semblance of "neediness". I may have come on too fast too strong initially so I backed off and took the no contact approach.

Yes I was prepared to write this girl off so the text/phone call on Nov 3 was a last ditch hail mary effort. She did express interest in seeing me again so we'll see where this goes.

Also I'm working on a few other girls so I'm not overly invested in this one.

Did she agree to go out with you as a result of the last phone call?

It sounds as though she has low interest- and it probably has nothing to do with you, either. Sometimes, you catch girls at a time where all they desire is validation. If this was an internet date, that is almost definitely the case.

Also, by going "no contact," what I really mean is "no contact until she contacts YOU." We want to avoid the frame in which we are chasing her- if she refuses to bite, so be it. I can speak from my own experiences that I NEVER have success "converting" a flaky girl unless SHE suddenly decides to take initiative and starts contacting me. As long as you continue to contact her, she will refuse to take any initiative, because you are still giving her validation.

I would suggest refraining from any contact with her until SHE starts contacting YOU. If she has interest at all, she will after two weeks or so. Then, don't reply to her for a solid day.

If you don't hear from her, it's probably not going to go anywhere- and that's ok. That doesn't even have to be endgame, though: save all the flaky girls you know in one list on your phone and every so often send out a bulk text message like, "I need a drink- wanna join me?" You never know which girl might actually surprise you and come through.

 

[PepperSpray]

Jeffst1980, thanks again for the solid advice and I think you're right on here.

Update.

After no contact since Friday, text her today:

Me (8:33 PM): do you know Rachel (her last name)?
Her (9:26 PM): Nope!

Call her around 11. Chat for 10 minutes, ask her if she's free tomorrow. She says she's busy with a huge lab report. She says next week would be better (we're both out of town this weekend). I say "alright let's make this more definitive. How's Tuesday." She says "Tuesday should be good, I should be done my lab report then". I say "alright there's this cool lounge I'd like to check out uptown, get on that lab report and make sure you get it done."

I can tolerate academic excuses. I understand college girls have demanding schedules and big assignments and lab reports. When I was in undergrad I was the same way - academics came first and I respect that so I wasn't pushy. (And hopefully she sees that, though in my experience girls tend to assume the worst and confuse kindness for weakness.)

Having said that I'm prepared to next this girl. The constant flakiness is annoying. If she flakes out on me Tuesday with no definitive counter-offer it's over.

I'll continue to work on the other girls on my roster, girls who are far more amenable. It'll be unfortunate to have to lose this one. This was the girl I had the best connection with on our first date - brought her back to my place and made out. She initiated the text the next day asking "did you enjoy yourself last night". However, the flakiness of most girls these days is intolerable and I wonder if all her academic pressures is leading her to put me on the backburner.

There are girls that legitimately put school first - and guys tend to get in the way of that!

 

[Re-ac-tor]

Yea, it's funny.

I got a number of a girl who works at the tanning salon I frequent.

She came up to me in the club I bounce at one night, I get her to write her # on my hand, text her a few days later, her saying no dice to the date I offered, though she countered with a random night after she's off at the salon.

Few days later I'm tannin', ask her to join me for drinks after work, she said nah she's running with her mom. She goes into how her schedule is packed etc. Lovely I say, you have my #, throw me a text whenever your sked clears up..

Came back tonight and I didn't bring anything up, same with a previous time I came in. I figured I gave her all the power, so, not wanting to come off like a chump, I don’t really wanna ask the broad out again..

Anything salvageable?

 

[Deicide]

One common problem with cold approach pickup (and dating in general) is that you are automatically penalized for being a stranger. You can go out and have a great date with a girl, only to have all the attraction evaporate in a few days as you exchange text messages, trying to plan another date.

The fact that you aren't someone that she sees regularly in her daily life means that it will be VERY difficult for her to feel any type of connection to you until you sleep with her. However, if you attempt to "forge" a connection by texting her continually, you will likely be punished for showing too much eagerness. It's a catch 22; this is why most traditional "dating" models don't lead to relationships.

The best strategy is to mimic the communication strategies of high valued men and prey on her need for validation. This is what it means to be a "challenge." Since the chemistry from your first date will be forgotten in days, the only way to get her interest level up is going to be to plant the seed that you aren't sure about her yet and have other prospects.

This means to avoid giving her any closure following the first date. Don't make plans for a second date on the first one, don't text her to make sure she got in ok at the end of the night, and don't text her the next day to thank her for a nice time. Wait at least a couple of days, unless she contacts you first...and even then, show restraint. Her need for validation is going to be the key to getting her out with you again, so you need to make her feel that tension and uncertainty.

When you DO ask her out again, keep it short and sweet- don't try too hard to be witty and keep these dates SIMPLE. A man valued by many women will NOT bend over backwards trying to impress a girl he just met. Trying to impress her will send her running at this stage in the game.

In the event that she can not make the day you suggest and doesn't offer an alternate day, say nothing. Either wait for her to text you again, or wait a week and contact her.

If she cancels the second date abruptly, say nothing.

The common thread in these responses is to treat disinterest with amplified disinterest- meaning that you won't even offer her closure by saying, "sure, that ok." This is the only way you can demonstrate value in these situations.

I hate game playing, and it's a shame that two people that like each other can't just go out and be transparent with one another. Unfortunately, part of building a connection with a woman lies in having her feel insecure about your feelings towards her -- in the early stages, anyway. If you've had a string of (seemingly) great first dates, only to have the girl disappear afterwards, it is because you failed to leave room for doubt. You will have much better luck if you disappear for a bit immediately following the first date.

I like this advice. Thanks for it, At this point of the game, I've been confused because I have no idea what to do. And it's also why I have first dates that go nowhere, leading to no sex. I should keep her wanting more throughout the interactions. Do you have any ideas how I can get laid on Day 2's from Day Game? A couple venue bounces than taking her to my house?

 

[Jeffst1980]

I like this advice. Thanks for it, At this point of the game, I've been confused because I have no idea what to do. And it's also why I have first dates that go nowhere, leading to no sex. I should keep her wanting more throughout the interactions. Do you have any ideas how I can get laid on Day 2's from Day Game? A couple venue bounces than taking her to my house?

Yes, multiple venue bounces are always a good idea. If you try to get her to come to your place and she seems apprehensive, just say, "Nothing's going to happen. I hardly know you." Don't force things, and understand the difference between her coyness and true resistance. If she doesn't want things to happen, she'll most likely politely say that she has to get going because she has an early morning. Always respect her boundaries.

The main thing you should try to do during day 2s is set a "screening" frame. You want to get her to qualify herself as much as possible, while avoiding jumping through HER hoops. That means no approval seeking behavior. When you catch yourself wondering, "does she like me?" replace that question with, "do I feel any chemistry with her?" If she shows signs of low interest and acts polite but standoffish, then she has ruined it for HERSELF, because you aren't feeling "chemistry." It shouldn't be your GOAL to bring home every girl you have a day2 with (although, at first, it may very well be your goal)- it's your goal to determine if there is any CHEMISTRY. When you frame it this way, you are less apt to try and "win" her over, and more likely to seem relaxed and confident.

 

[maverick72]

Just the opposite

I do exactly the opposite of what you guys do and have great success.

It is called Plowing.

I get aggresive with women and hound them to go out, then when I do I treat her like we are already dating. I will take her hand and hold it, escort her to a movie or dinner. Generally lead the date. Then back to my car afterwards to drop her off. Then we make out in the car for 15-20 minutes.
Then I text me to see if she got home ok? If she texts me back game on!
I will then set up another date that night. I will sometimes call her the next day --hoping she wont pick up the phone---and I will leave a nice, sweet, romantic message telling her a wonderful time with the most gorgeous girl that I had the opporunity of meeting. Then i will text her few hours later and just maybe....send a sweet chocolate or flowers with the email. Corny. But the point is that I am Plowing her. Im showing her attention and being agressive in my interest. But be charming. Everything you do has to be positive. If she ignores you. Say to her....'awww you are so sweet, even if you dont want talk I am here for you.' Then send her a note saying 'your special.' I am breaking down her defenses. Then I stop. Compeletely stop everything and disappear. Then a few days later they get anxious and call me back and wonder what happened to me. I usually say I am busy.

Then I wait for them to ask me out. They all usually say yes.
Then on the date, no hold bar. I will get agressive physically and frenhc kiss them and grab their tits in my car playfully, or smack their ass as we are leavign a movie theatre or store.

And get sexual with them.
Within the next feww hours they are in my bed.

Its a game. All of it a game. You got to go to extremes with them. Show tons of interest in the beginning then completely ignore them the next. Then let them chase you after you have Plowed them.

Try it sometime.

 

[Jeffst1980]

I do exactly the opposite of what you guys do and have great success.

It is called Plowing.

I get aggresive with women and hound them to go out, then when I do I treat her like we are already dating. I will take her hand and hold it, escort her to a movie or dinner. Generally lead the date. Then back to my car afterwards to drop her off. Then we make out in the car for 15-20 minutes.
Then I text me to see if she got home ok? If she texts me back game on!
I will then set up another date that night. I will sometimes call her the next day --hoping she wont pick up the phone---and I will leave a nice, sweet, romantic message telling her a wonderful time with the most gorgeous girl that I had the opporunity of meeting. Then i will text her few hours later and just maybe....send a sweet chocolate or flowers with the email. Corny. But the point is that I am Plowing her. Im showing her attention and being agressive in my interest. But be charming. Everything you do has to be positive. If she ignores you. Say to her....'awww you are so sweet, even if you dont want talk I am here for you.' Then send her a note saying 'your special.' I am breaking down her defenses. Then I stop. Compeletely stop everything and disappear. Then a few days later they get anxious and call me back and wonder what happened to me. I usually say I am busy.

Then I wait for them to ask me out. They all usually say yes.
Then on the date, no hold bar. I will get agressive physically and frenhc kiss them and grab their tits in my car playfully, or smack their ass as we are leavign a movie theatre or store.

And get sexual with them.
Within the next feww hours they are in my bed.

Its a game. All of it a game. You got to go to extremes with them. Show tons of interest in the beginning then completely ignore them the next. Then let them chase you after you have Plowed them.

Try it sometime.

Actually, you're applying the same principles here; you're just making a sharper contrast between pursuing them and ignoring them. The fact that you sharply cut off their source of validation will create intrigue, and set them up to take on the role of the pursuer when they attempt to regain your attention. It's the same reason girls that rejected you in the past often re-appear the minute you get a new girlfriend.

The only caution I would give is that this approach is risky, because it forces you to set a less than flattering initial impression of yourself. Any girl who doesn't have high interest in you already will likely be put off by the sheer amount of supplication involved. But, game is game, and if an approach is working for you, there's no sense in changing it.

 

[PepperSpray]

Second Date

Update - so went out with her Friday night (instead of Tuesday as originally planned, she had a lot of assignments and although she said she'd come out I said "no finish your assignments we'll go out on Friday"). Hit up a pub and then a club afterwards. Drank and danced and grinded on the dance floor and made out for a bit on the couches.

Afterwards we went back to my apartment and watched the Bob Saget comedy roast. We're sitting on my couch and laughing hard although the whole time she still has has her coat on. She has her head cuddled against my chest and I'm stroking her hair... and about a half hour in I notice her suddenly getting quiet - she was passing out! I woke her up and we kissed for a bit, but then she passed out again.

As she was asleep I got up from the couch, turned off the TV, turned off all the lights and went to bed on my own. A couple hours later I guess she'd awoken form her slumber and I heard her quietly slip out the door.

Still not sure what to make of her. At times she seems affectionate, at times distant. She readily submits to my frame when I suggest something and is always down for whatever I lead her to do. Yet I suspect she has some unresolved LSE/anxiety issues - she's a bit of a loner, lives at home with her parents, not a lot of friends and confesses to being slightly socially awkward. She also spends a lot of time on Reddit and has some problems managing schoolwork. Still, the slight social awkwardness is not a dealbreaker as she's cute, pleasant company, and fun to be with. However, she's not the best kisser and never initiates anything physical - and although she's always receptive when I initiate, I don't feel that she puts much effort in (ie. she receives but doesn't reciprocate).

With most "normal" girls I can smoothly escalate and get something going. But this girl has thrown a monkey wrench into my system - with the hot & cold/mixed signals she's got confused. Sometimes I feel she genuinely likes me, sometimes I'm not so sure. I think I've played everything well, being dominant and leading when necessary but showing restraint and not taking advantage of her when vulnerable.

Is this girl just a headcase with baggage? What am I to do at this point?

 

[PepperSpray]

Date was on Friday night. Texts exchanged Saturday:

Her (7:00 PM): Hey
Me (7:22 PM): what's up
Her (7:24 PM): Just seeing how youre doing if you had a good time last night..
Me (7:28 PM): until you passed out out again. ez on the drinks next time
Her (7:31 PM): Yeah i probably could have stopped after the first screwdriver
Her (7:33 PM): In my defence i probably would have been just as tired had i been sober
Me (7:41 PM): k we'll take it easy next time
Her (7:46 PM): It seems that every time i drink now i wake up a bit ashamed of myself
Her (8:50 PM): Sorry did u call? I was eating

Didn't respond to her last two texts. And no, I didn't call.

Thoughts?

 

[Jeffst1980]

Well done on that last exchange. She's becoming more interested in you- you can tell just from the fact that she initiated it---which is huge--AND texted you AGAIN after you ignored her text. I would expect her to be a bit more compliant with your requests to hang out now, but don't allude to any plans of seeing her again just yet, unless she asks you out. Give her a couple days of silence to stoke the fires of interest.

She sounds like a classic introvert, which means that she will be slow to feel comfortable with you. You are going to have to escalate very slowly and avoid pressuring her- "falling asleep" is a pretty common tactic that shy girls will use when they feel like they may be getting physical too soon. Make sure you start the dates in a neutral setting, and if you do take her back to your place, mention that you have to get up early. Comfort is key!

 

[PepperSpray]

So I called her on Tuesday and set up a dessert date for Friday.

No contact Wed or Thurs. Texts from Friday:

Her (3:17 PM): Yo man... I already want dessert haha
Me (6:52 PM): lol g working late again. I'll pick you up at 10
Her (few minutes later): Yes sir

Picked her up from her house. Drove over to a coffee house, split a cheesecake (~ 30 min). Drove over to little pub after, split a pitcher (~ 1.5 hrs). Talk about the usual - movies, TV, family, work etc laced with some playful teasing back and forth. We talk about Seinfeld and I ask if she likes Curb Your Enthusiasm, she says yes, and I tell her it's one of my fav shows. We get to talking about one particular episode she's only seen clips of it but it's hilarious, and I tell her that I have that episode stored on my external HD (ruse to bring her back to my place). Finish our drinks, split the pill.

So we drive back to my place, I link up my laptop to the TV, put on the episode of CYE and turn all the lights out. We sit on my couch, we're both laughing and having a good time. Head to the kitchen, pop open a bottle of wine, bring two glasses back to the living room and we both have a glass. Arm around her and stroking her thigh.

When it ends I put on some slow jams, go caveman and we start making out. She asks if I have more wine, I say have a lot more and we both have another glass. I take her blazer off, she's got on a tank top underneath and asks me for a massage. Afterwards I pull her over to me, she straddles me on the couch and we both have our tops off. I pick her up, her legs wrapped around my waist, carry her to the bedroom and throw her on the bed. One thing leads to another, slip on a rubber - missionary, doggy, cowgirl, BJ - and it's done. Cuddle for a bit, tell her we'll grab a bite sometime later, and then she says she has to go - calls her dad to pick her up!

First day game F-close!

 

[Financed]

Sorry to dig up an old thread but I am in between the first and second date with a girl I've been stalking for a while and thread is spot on with my situation. I'm just looking for some advice/direction.

So this new girl I met through a mutual friend at the beginning of summer. We were both dating other people at the time but she really caught my eye. After that she friended me on Facebook and we exchanged a few messages ect. Randomly I asked her to go to the beach one weekend with a few friends, which she knew them too, but she couldn't make it having other plans and said def let me know next time. Next time came around and she came along. We had a great time, lots of flirting and so on. We did sleep in the same bed but nothing happened beyond cuddling. She gave me her number before we left and we only texted a few times, mostly initiated by her, for the next couple of weeks. I saw her at a concert in that time and played a little more standoffish with her and it definitely worked. So then I finally took initiative and called her and asked her out. She said yes enthusiastically and we went to dinner and drinks after. She couldn't stay out too late because she had work early but I walked her to her car and we hugged. I didn't try for the kiss just yet. About an hour later I get a text with a picture from her of her dog taking up the whole bed and thanking me for dinner and that she had a good time. Now, when we went to get drinks she started to open up a bit and talked A LOT, which I thoroughly enjoyed. She's always been more shy around me. The next morning, and early, I get a long text apologizing for talking so much and again thanking me and told me she's glad we got to go out. Later on I replied "to make a long story short I enjoyed it as well." The long 'long story short' bit was a joke from the night before. She had said that a few times in her longer stories and I joked about them def not being short. We went out Thursday, she texted me Friday morning then I didn't call her again until Tuesday. Was planning to ask for date two. I left a message and she later text me that she'll call me tomorrow unless I wanted to text her. I didn't reply and she didn't call the next day. The following day I sent her a text asking if she wanted to meet for a drink later when she eventually replied that she has a long day at work and is beat but shell have to take a rain check. This is when I took it as pretty much being blown off. Now, tomorrow night I'll see her but I'm planning to play it standoffish again andddd was even contemplating bringing another girl I'm seeing to this party...

What are you're thought gentlemen?

 

[For_F]

Dude does all this advice relate to shy and modest chicks aswell? I've dated a bunch of great looking but originally very shy girls and if you give them too much quiet time or play this sort of game - they don't interpret it the same way as more outgoing or slvtty girls do mainly because they aren't hooking up every week and once 'committed' to you they don't play their options a great deal because of their nature.

I'm just concerned about much of the advice being too stereotypical.

 

[zekko]

I hate game playing, and it's a shame that two people that like each other can't just go out and be transparent with one another. Unfortunately, part of building a connection with a woman lies in having her feel insecure about your feelings towards her -- in the early stages, anyway.

I find that this happens naturally, without any games. As long as you just focus on having a good time with her, and not moon over her like a lovesick teenager.

If you've had a string of (seemingly) great first dates, only to have the girl disappear afterwards, it is because you failed to leave room for doubt

I think it's more likely that you failed to show her a good time, or she decided you were not high value enough for her. I think when you're with a new girl, it's important that you are relaxed and show her your real personality, in its best light, in a fun way. But I agree you should not lose your head over the girl - remember the situation, it is an early stage in the interaction, and you shouldn't get ahead of yourself by developing strong feelings. Just keep your cool, and things will follow their natural course. She may like you, she may not.

To make a connection, the real you has to shine through. You can't walk around with a stick up your @ss trying to act like you're a big pimp and don't care about anyone or anything, trying to convince her that you're a sociopath, so she thinks you have "game". Although if you are a low value guy, I suppose that is the sort of thing you have to resort to.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Sorry to dig up an old thread but I am in between the first and second date with a girl I've been stalking for a while and thread is spot on with my situation. I'm just looking for some advice/direction.

So this new girl I met through a mutual friend at the beginning of summer. We were both dating other people at the time but she really caught my eye. After that she friended me on Facebook and we exchanged a few messages ect. Randomly I asked her to go to the beach one weekend with a few friends, which she knew them too, but she couldn't make it having other plans and said def let me know next time. Next time came around and she came along. We had a great time, lots of flirting and so on. We did sleep in the same bed but nothing happened beyond cuddling. She gave me her number before we left and we only texted a few times, mostly initiated by her, for the next couple of weeks. I saw her at a concert in that time and played a little more standoffish with her and it definitely worked. So then I finally took initiative and called her and asked her out. She said yes enthusiastically and we went to dinner and drinks after. She couldn't stay out too late because she had work early but I walked her to her car and we hugged. I didn't try for the kiss just yet. About an hour later I get a text with a picture from her of her dog taking up the whole bed and thanking me for dinner and that she had a good time. Now, when we went to get drinks she started to open up a bit and talked A LOT, which I thoroughly enjoyed. She's always been more shy around me. The next morning, and early, I get a long text apologizing for talking so much and again thanking me and told me she's glad we got to go out. Later on I replied "to make a long story short I enjoyed it as well." The long 'long story short' bit was a joke from the night before. She had said that a few times in her longer stories and I joked about them def not being short. We went out Thursday, she texted me Friday morning then I didn't call her again until Tuesday. Was planning to ask for date two. I left a message and she later text me that she'll call me tomorrow unless I wanted to text her. I didn't reply and she didn't call the next day. The following day I sent her a text asking if she wanted to meet for a drink later when she eventually replied that she has a long day at work and is beat but shell have to take a rain check. This is when I took it as pretty much being blown off. Now, tomorrow night I'll see her but I'm planning to play it standoffish again andddd was even contemplating bringing another girl I'm seeing to this party...

What are you're thought gentlemen?

Your over-analyzing. Girls will qualify and test you early on; they will flake on dates, cancel last minute, not return texts etc etc all in an effort to make you want them more.

Seems to be working.

She seems like she's pretty into you, so rest assured that her interest is def still there.

I wouldn't recommend bringing another girl to the party because it will be pretty obvious that you are doing it to get a rise out of her if she knows you will be there.

What I would do is two things:

a) def be super outgoing at the party, talk to everyone, including other girls.

b) when you see her, act like nothing fazed you. Talk with her, flirt with her and see how she responds. If its positive, then you know your still in. However don't spend all your time with her, def mingle and do your own thing as well.

She will either text you a day or two after the party and if she doesn't then you should hit her up and set up a date if she was receptive to you at the party.

As Jeff said, I know its stupid; but this is the ritual dance that men and women go through when they are in that no man's land. Your not exclusive, but you both have interest in each other.

What women are looking for is a confident man who has options. If she see's that your smiling and unaffected by her then she will want you.










PIMP

 

[Financed]

Your over-analyzing. Girls will qualify and test you early on; they will flake on dates, cancel last minute, not return texts etc etc all in an effort to make you want them more.

Seems to be working.

She seems like she's pretty into you, so rest assured that her interest is def still there.

I wouldn't recommend bringing another girl to the party because it will be pretty obvious that you are doing it to get a rise out of her if she knows you will be there.

What I would do is two things:

a) def be super outgoing at the party, talk to everyone, including other girls.

b) when you see her, act like nothing fazed you. Talk with her, flirt with her and see how she responds. If its positive, then you know your still in. However don't spend all your time with her, def mingle and do your own thing as well.

She will either text you a day or two after the party and if she doesn't then you should hit her up and set up a date if she was receptive to you at the party.

As Jeff said, I know its stupid; but this is the ritual dance that men and women go through when they are in that no man's land. Your not exclusive, but you both have interest in each other.

What women are looking for is a confident man who has options. If she see's that your smiling and unaffected by her then she will want you.










PIMP

You make good points, thanks. She didn't counter offer so that's why I'm leaning towards being blown off. And I don't take a rain check as a counter offer! Haha

I won't take the other girl to the party and I def know how to play it. This one just spun my head a bit and I like bouncing my thoughts off other people.

Have a good weekend!!

 

[steveparish]

Very few things in dating I find to work 100% of the time. There are always exceptions to every rule. But remember that exceptions don't change the rules much.

I personally think that most women will throw you to the curve if they perceive you as being 100% available.