How to handle this..

[Doug81]

Ok, I've had some kind of casual (kino, kissing, hugging, talking alot...ect) relationship with this 35 year old woman (I'm 19). When we're together shes very affectionate and playful and a great person to be around. But tonight I ran into her downtown with a couple of her friends (one guy and one girl) about her age. She totally blew me off like I meant nothing. I think it has to do with the age difference and the "what will they think?" mentallity she seems to have around her friends. Well, i called her and just left her a message and jokingly said that i won't let her get away with that again..

I really want to bust on her tommorow when I see her about blowing me off. You see, I was going to introduce her to a couple of my friends so they could see this wonderful woman (who has lost a few points now for being flaky). But heres the kicker, I don't get upset about things like this anymore because I know how to handle it so it doesn't happen again. I'll just play it off lighthearted and she'll see that I'm not the sort of guy who gets upset by stupid things. I think I'm finally seeing the ways of the DJ.

 

[Tails]

i think she doesn't think of you as a boyfriend bro. she just likes your company. so think about it, when you're with a guy friend, and they see other people, do you care if he walks off and ignores you? i don't. she probably thinks of you like another friend. but sexually. just without the love. so don't get so into her, remember she's just around to mess with you. take advantage brotha.

 

[Doug81]

Could be..

But i didn't tell you this crap, she thinks of me as her "soul mate". We talk for like hours upon hours and she says that shes never felt this strong of a connection with someone and that we're meant to be. So theres some degree of love there. i just think that maybe it's that she wants to keep me a "secret" right now because of the age difference. Either way, I don't think it's cool what she did, but i won't make a big deal about it, as long as she makes it up to me

 

[Tails]

i think you should just fool around with her. she's not your soul mate bro. she's much older than you and it will never last. so just get it over and done with. fuk her, hang with her, all that crap

 

[Doug81]

so just because of the age thing, I should never be serious about her...? That seems pretty stupid to me, besides I'm not much attracted to girls my own age..

 

[Tails]

yeah okay, go ahead then, fall in love with a woman twice your age, you silly man. by the time YOU are 30, she'll be like what... 50? 60? don't you know women just talk bullsh|t? they're confused creatures bro. they say stupid things all the time. like for example, her telling you and her are soul mates? haha. if she ignores you with her friends and you don't like it, you're not the man for her.

 

[TOOBAD]

Dude, your like 19? Have fun! Sure she's fun to be with, sure she's cool, but do your own thing on the side, keep up the challenge, find other hotties (Preferably younger) and make your choice. Is she everything you want in a women? she just dissed you and she like 30? she ain't gonna learn respect at that age? Keep your interest at 50%, that way you won't get cut again by something small. Be objective and look at her actions.

Get out there and have fun!

Cheers!

 

[Doug81]

Well, the truth is I'm not like most 19 year olds. i connected pretty deep with this 35 year old. We talk about sex all the time, like what her favorite positions are and how her first time was and all of that. I'm a virgin so a woman with this much sexual experience is scary, but I like her alot. I really do. I want to have sex with this woman so bad, but I'm afraid of her thinking I'm a pervert because shes had so many guys screw with her head, she'd have sex with them, then they'd leave her and screw her over. So now any tyoe of sexual advance is considered an attack and she backs away. But me and her on a different level. Should I just come out and say I want to have sex with her. I'm afraid she'll just think thats all I'm after, but it's not everything to me. Damn she hasn't had it in 9 months and I'm willing and able to please her, so how do I make that known and clear without coming across as pushy, just maybe to put the idea in her head and use conditioning to make her put me and sex together, so she'll be coming on to me and it won't make her feel ike I'm forcing her.

I'm not a DJ, I'm just an AFC trying to make her happy. But then again the normal rules don't apply with a 35 year old. So what do I do? I just want to have sex with her and see what goes from there.

 

[quest]

dude... come on.. lol..

i've had sex with 10 girls, and if they arnt to bad looking i start feeling like i'm in love with them..

u've never had sex so ur prob like that with girls who pay you some attention..

the more girls u experiement with the less u'll like each girl, you'll see them for what they really are..

if u'd never owned a car and you got some 35 year old peice of **** which had been thrashed and not well looked after, you'd think that was **** hot. had u not had experiences with other cars.

but i'm sure u have, and because of that, u wouldnt settle for an unstable ride which is going to fall apart and look worse and worse everyday..

get something up to date mate. **** this girl, don't pass it up. its an experience i'd love to have. but find a girl ur own age.

 

[Evil-Rom]

Originally posted by Doug81
Well, the truth is I'm not like most 19 year olds. i connected pretty deep with this 35 year old. We talk about sex all the time, like what her favorite positions are and how her first time was and all of that. I'm a virgin so a woman with this much sexual experience is scary, but I like her alot. I really do. I want to have sex with this woman so bad, but I'm afraid of her thinking I'm a pervert because shes had so many guys screw with her head, she'd have sex with them, then they'd leave her and screw her over. So now any tyoe of sexual advance is considered an attack and she backs away. But me and her on a different level. Should I just come out and say I want to have sex with her. I'm afraid she'll just think thats all I'm after, but it's not everything to me. Damn she hasn't had it in 9 months and I'm willing and able to please her, so how do I make that known and clear without coming across as pushy, just maybe to put the idea in her head and use conditioning to make her put me and sex together, so she'll be coming on to me and it won't make her feel ike I'm forcing her.

I'm not a DJ, I'm just an AFC trying to make her happy. But then again the normal rules don't apply with a 35 year old. So what do I do? I just want to have sex with her and see what goes from there.

End yourself.

Okay, maybe a bit harsh. Stop chasing after a desperate 35 year old women who is twice your ago and won't have sex with you. She is just using you for attention. To quote from another post:

it's most likely shes trying to look/feel younger as apposed to wanting to get laid. She wants you to look at her so she can feel like a hot teenager again..... and thats all she needs.

 

[Crank_It_Up]

Originally posted by Doug81
...Should I just come out and say I want to have sex with her...

no... wait till next time you are kissing her and then just let your hands do your talking for you.

 

[Doug81]

I think I love this woman, and you people might not understabd this feeling, but I want to hav sex with her so bad. She keeps saying "I haven't had it in 9 months, I miss it", then she tells me about positions and what feels good to her and how often her last boyfriend and her did it and it drives me absolutley crazy. I want to fvck her so bad!

 

[Mercenary]

Originally posted by Doug81
I think I love this woman, and you people might not understabd this feeling, but I want to hav sex with her so bad. She keeps saying "I haven't had it in 9 months, I miss it", then she tells me about positions and what feels good to her and how often her last boyfriend and her did it and it drives me absolutley crazy. I want to fvck her so bad!

you're getting owned son. you aren't equipped to deal with this. it will end badly for you.

 

[Wonderbread166]

"Attachment can only lead to pain." -Buddhist (and DJ) principle

Awww, so she's your solemate, huh? I didn't get a wedding invitation! Seriously, don't say we "don't understand this feeling." We understand it completely, but it's a bad idea . You're only setting yourself up to be hurt. Read the Bible, go meet other girls, and get your mind off her. What? You don't like girls your age? Quit making excuses! There are much, much better prospects out there and you need to get your azz up and go meet them!

Good luck,
Wb

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by Doug81
so just because of the age thing, I should never be serious about her...?

Exactly. She's hitting her sexual peak and you're a horny, virile young stud. That's the extent of it. If she's into you more than that, then she's got mental issues.

I don't think she is, though. I think she wants you to f*ck her brains out and she's tried everything to get you to sway that way, from spewing some "soul-mate" bullsh*t in your direction to sitting there talking about how long it's been since she's had sex and all the wonderful things she'd do to you.

If it were any other situation, I'd say next time you see her, bang her brains out.

But it's too late for that...you're unnaturally attached. And if you sleep with her now, you're just going to get even more attached and YOU WILL get your heart broken.

Come on, man...she's 35. You don't care for women your own age because you're a pu$$y (I'm not saying that to be offensive, I'm saying it because it's the truth) and girls your own age don't throw themselves mindlessly into your lap like some 35 year old woman who's about to lose what's left of her youth and wants to enjoy whatever sex she can get does.

If you REALLY think that this older woman is the one, then sleep with three women your own age. Then come back to her. If she's still "the one," then do what you want.

If you even remember her.

 

[Befuddled]

Originally posted by Doug81
I think I love this woman, and you people might not understabd this feeling, but I want to hav sex with her so bad. She keeps saying "I haven't had it in 9 months, I miss it", then she tells me about positions and what feels good to her and how often her last boyfriend and her did it and it drives me absolutley crazy. I want to fvck her so bad!

Ummmm..... dude....dude......dude.

Since when do soul mates blow each other off in Public ? i'm gonna go out on a limb here and say shes a AW. you gotta realize this is merely a fling for her. right ? do you honestly think she wants to be in a LTR with someone whos just out of highschool ? It's a fling....enjoy it, dont expect anything more.

And for gawd's sake, dont use the 'L' word.

Cheers.

 

[CharmaLeo]

LOL you have this woman in a platter and you want to fvck it up by acting like a wuss. She wants to screw you bad too.

Women don't like to be thought as hoes (even though they may be) in front of other people, especially other women. The last thing a woman her age wants is to be drooled upon by a chump.

God knows how but you spiked her interest so don't get out of control and screw it up.

Wait for the right moment and C/F whisper in her ear that you want to make love to her. Or tell her that you are curious to see the way she makes love.

She is not a child, so she can handle those words.

If she really wants to fvck you she will welcome your boldness. If not then she is an AW (attention w hore) and forget about her.

And don't tell me you are in love LOL. You know and she knows you want to do her. She is not looking for love, or a puppy. She wants a good screw period.

 

[Doug81]

Sorry, both of us are a little messed up in the head. I'll take my problems elsewhere...