How to get a girlfriend?

[prince157]

hi, I have been going on dates with this girl for about a month and I really like her and I want her to be my girlfriend, but the problem is that I havnt had a girlfriend before so I really dont know how to ask. Im not worried about her answer, I just dont know how to tell her. Do i say "Do you want to be my girlfriend?" or what??? that sounds kinda immature or is that what im supposed to say? What exactly do I say and how do I say it?
Thank you!!

 

[penkitten]

yes you can say " hey do you wanna go steady "
or "hey do you wanna be my girl"

 

[Brother_Rapp]

If you're going to do it like that, then you'd better be sure that your definition of going steady is the same as her'. Tell her that you'd like to have a closer relationship with her and would she like the same.Then describe what you're talking about. Some type of exclusivity with each other. Ask her about her future plans and be supportive of her efforts (like help her study or find scholarships in her field of interest). Somewhere in there, you should discuss sex. How does she feel about it. It's going to come up sooner or later.

 

[DJStudent]

Out of curiosity how old are you? If you're like 14-16 then asking a girlfriend might be in order, but if you're older like 18+ show her you want her to be your gf by first kissing her. If she wants you she'll kiss you back if not she'll hold back. But you find out quite easily and truthfully how she feels about you that moment in time.

 

[Joe The Homophobe]

Originally posted by DJStudent
If she wants you she'll kiss you back if not she'll hold back. But you find out quite easily and truthfully how she feels about you that moment in time.

do what he says. You have been going out on dates for about a month. She is probably just waiting for you to kiss her and make it all official! go ahead and kiss her, you won't even have to ask her to be your gf. The response you get from the kiss will be pretty clear as to whether she wants to be your girl or not.

 

[RoeCyris]

im kind of curious on the same subject but im usually a firstdate kisser, if not more. And it's not like im just kissing her, WE are kissing, lol.

I figure that after going out for a little while with a girl that i actually like, i will say something along the lines of "i really feel a unique connection with you" [wait for a pos response] "and to be honest, for now, i dont wanna try and find this kind of connection with anyone else and you shouldn't either cuz i dont think you'll find it."

SOMETHING along thsoe lines although reading it back i dont like it.

Anyways, more advice on the subject?

 

[becker]

Originally posted by Joe The Homophobe
do what he says. You have been going out on dates for about a month. She is probably just waiting for you to kiss her and make it all official! go ahead and kiss her, you won't even have to ask her to be your gf. The response you get from the kiss will be pretty clear as to whether she wants to be your girl or not.

I beg to differ on the kiss thing. Girls will kiss guys without that intention at all. Last girl I was with I kissed and we had a thing going for quite a while, but she didn't want anything too serious, just dating, which includes kissing among other things But, I guess in my past, it's usually the girl who brings it up. For some reason if you bring it up, it doesn't work. I have no idea why.

 

[wind20mph]

My suggestion is to show her, not tell her. Why? because you will end up in the "I don't want to ruin our friendship" thing.

My first very case in high school wnet that way. would you want to?

Do the kiss test.

 

[Climax]

An idea...

After talkin on the subject of "love" or "relationships" etc...

You: So how would you like to be my girfriend? (do this while holding her hand or something similar)

Her: omg, I would love to be your girlfriend

You: Ok, now that i got that out (she will probably laugh/giggle when u say that) what you say we go to (name of place) tonight?

Her: ok kewl, sounds good

You: Shweet

Then the 2 of you just contiue to talk normaly.... And when u leave/part eachother, try get a kiss in

Good luck...


Laterz...

 

[kapz]

How are you two like when you are togather how does she react when ou touch her and hug her. If good the nhave you gone for the kiss?

 

[DJStudent]

Originally posted by becker
I beg to differ on the kiss thing. Girls will kiss guys without that intention at all. Last girl I was with I kissed and we had a thing going for quite a while, but she didn't want anything too serious, just dating, which includes kissing among other things But, I guess in my past, it's usually the girl who brings it up. For some reason if you bring it up, it doesn't work. I have no idea why.

There are people that kiss all the time that has little meaning behind the kiss. But you have to look at his situation, not yours. He needs a way to ask her to be his gf and what better test then the kissing test. How would you ask her to be your gf beside taking the initiative and kissing her?

Granted kissing her doesn't automatically assume that you guys are going steady (happened to me). It's a good show if she's interested or not. I do however kiss occassionally kiss girls with no intentions but depends on the girl i'm with.

 

[Chemistry]

We're talking tongue in mouth not girly pal kiss on cheek here... just slide your hand round her hip and onto her rear whilst lookin into her eyes and movin in for the kiss

Definitely against the "Do you want to be my GF" line... just run with the whole vibe but work on increasing the sexual tension with kino etc so that you're waaaay more than friends is obvious

 

[Climax]

errr....

Originally posted by Ashley Chuckles
We're talking tongue in mouth not girly pal kiss on cheek here... just slide your hand round her hip and onto her rear whilst lookin into her eyes and movin in for the kiss

Definitely against the "Do you want to be my GF" line... just run with the whole vibe but work on increasing the sexual tension with kino etc so that you're waaaay more than friends is obvious

Not really... People do a lot more than just kiss.. hell... people even have sex..... that doesn’t make them anything more than friends the next morning though... Making things "official" / "proper" should be done... and it doesn’t have to be by "asking" her to be your girlfriend..... The 2 of you can just talk about other couples and then u can say something like "You think that we should also become official?" or "I think that we should be bf&gf now, what u say?" .. or u can use the way that I suggested above. This isn’t a big deal, nor should u make it into one, if u want her to be ur girlfriend, and u know that the answer will be yes, then just let her know that u WANT it, and there shouldn’t be a problem.


Laterz...

 

[Chemistry]

I really get the impression that isn't happening right now...

If it is however... it falls right in with the if it ain't broke don't fix it and is reason to continue things with the current vibe... if everything is in place except the nametag then why rush to label things? It'll appear with time naturally

 

[becker]

Originally posted by DJStudent
There are people that kiss all the time that has little meaning behind the kiss. But you have to look at his situation, not yours. He needs a way to ask her to be his gf and what better test then the kissing test. How would you ask her to be your gf beside taking the initiative and kissing her?

Granted kissing her doesn't automatically assume that you guys are going steady (happened to me). It's a good show if she's interested or not. I do however kiss occassionally kiss girls with no intentions but depends on the girl i'm with.

I guess I just find kissing very unconvincing when it comes to serious relationships. I just don't think it means that much to people anymore, but it may just be me. I can kiss a girl, and it can mean absolutely nothing to either me or her. Yes, it means there is some level of interest, but it may be a very small level of interest for a kiss to happen, which can make it very deceiving. Girls may kiss guys because it's just for experience and they just feel like it. It doesn't mean they want to get into anything serious now, or even later. It all depends on whether she brings up the topic or not to me, not the kiss test.

 

[BES]

after a couple of dates with a lot of girls i decided to become steady with 1 girl.

(just want to thank all the don juan members who answer my question cuz i was a AFC when i first started...i was a wussy asking phone numbers and now its all gone now) you wont gain anything unless you do it!

I ask a girl if she wants to be my girl in the second date hahaha (hold her hands look her in the eye) FIrst date was awesome flirting and stuff......(also i think the whole thing change when i wrote her a poem)

we have been talking a lot about getting closer together and serious relationship everyday after the first date. so she ask me wat r we? i told her i will tell you on the second date.

On the second date:
after we ate and went on the parking lot i hold both her hands and look seriously in the eye (she is shock or giggling or something) and I pop the question.
but she said she will think about it ....hug her and i kiss her cheecks hahaha and after a minute when i was driving home she text me telling "yes i want you to be my BF" weird......

my respond:
ok but i want to hear it from your voice and its comming out of your heart so i can get a kiss hahhaha

I learn my lesson again:
last time i was direct and didnt tell ehr what i feel first arghhh....
next time i will give her something something(make her feel more comfortable) and pop the question again.

and after she said yes i will go for the kiss.

Not bad though we are like a couple now.... calling each other everyday checking each other its like the chemistry is their already.

this girl is different than the other girls i have dated.........

 

[Mr. Mystery II]

If you have been seeing her for a month already, I can only assume you have already kissed her. Kissing DOES NOT MEAN SHES YOUR GIRLFRIEND.

Tell her you don't want to share her with anyone else. She will either get where your going with this or will say shes not seeing anyone else, to which you could reply lets make this official.

Mr. Mystery

 

[becker]

A girl I dated told me that she didn't believe in dating multiple people, so essentially she would see things as exclusive if you were dating. However, she didn't want to be exclusive when I told her I was fine with being exclusive with her too. It was a weird situation, and it wasn't even a really weird girl, which made it really weird.

 

[Climax]

err... i think not!

Originally posted by Ashley Chuckles
I really get the impression that isn't happening right now...

If it is however... it falls right in with the if it ain't broke don't fix it and is reason to continue things with the current vibe... if everything is in place except the nametag then why rush to label things? It'll appear with time naturally

You can ask the opposite question.... Why delay things?

Mr. Mystery II also put it well...

If you have been seeing her for a month already, I can only assume you have already kissed her. Kissing DOES NOT MEAN SHES YOUR GIRLFRIEND.
Tell her you don't want to share her with anyone else. She will either get where your going with this or will say shes not seeing anyone else, to which you could reply lets make this official.

Laterz...

 

[yunghova35]

Originally posted by prince157
hi, I have been going on dates with this girl for about a month and I really like her and I want her to be my girlfriend, but the problem is that I havnt had a girlfriend before so I really dont know how to ask. Im not worried about her answer, I just dont know how to tell her. Do i say "Do you want to be my girlfriend?" or what??? that sounds kinda immature or is that what im supposed to say? What exactly do I say and how do I say it?
Thank you!!

SMH