How to derive confidence from having a high paying job?

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I have a high paying engineering job but that fact doesn't make it any easier to approach a 10 when I see one. Despite the fact that she might be a college student earning nothing and doing an useless Arts course. Any thoughts?
 

Diaforetikos

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Wow guy. You've been here since 2007 and you still don't get it?

Look, your confidence is not gonna go up because you have money. I've seen tons of guys with decent income ask me for advice. I'm broke as I don't know what, but I can still talk to girls, and get them out on a date.

You need to feel confident before money comes into the picture. If your good with women before the money, you'll be a lot better with the money. But if you suck with women before the money, you'll be just as bad when you do get money. Sounds confusing, but try to understand that.

Just go out, make mistakes, and you'll get better.
 
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Diaforetikos said:
Wow guy. You've been here since 2007 and you still don't get it?

Look, your confidence is not gonna go up because you have money.
Ok, why I got the thought that a good job is supposed to contribute to confidence? You can see tons of threads here on sosuave that advice you to stay away from pickups if you are broke.
Another thing is that I see a lots of engineers/doctors identity themselves with that profession all the time and carry that air with them, that looks like a kind of confidence atleast in the context of the workplace (I on the other hand, don't identify myself with the job anything beyond as a means of living) although I don't know whether they would be able to carry that confidence to women as well.
 

boarderdude

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AreYouSingleFemale said:
Another thing is that I see a lots of engineers/doctors identity themselves with that profession all the time and carry that air with them, that looks like a kind of confidence atleast in the context of the workplace (I on the other hand, don't identify myself with the job anything beyond as a means of living) although I don't know whether they would be able to carry that confidence to women as well.
Perhaps that's the difference in you and those people. To those people, their career, passion, goals, and identity may be focused around that profession, and in their mind, having accomplished such goals provides self confidence.
 

garruk

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i have a pretty successful career myself, and a big part of confidence you derive from it: is in spending the money. Are you getting morebottles at the club than me? do you fly first/business class? are your clothes more expensive than the next guy? is your condo's view nicer than mine?

if youre answering "no" to these questions.. then how are you any different from the broke guy down the street?


Aside from that, its important to realize that just having the career is a small part of being a person. I take pride in my career but i take pride in my physique and the hours ive spent at the gym as well. i take pride in my social network, my hobbies, etc.
 

corrector

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It is posts like this that people should tune into because it breaks myths, that you have to have a certain money or status before you get good at pick-up. This is not the first post I've seen on here like this. I've seen three other people post different things.

One person posted he was a lawyer, but horded his money in his account and lived in a condo, then complained on here. People advised him to spend money on enhancing his image to show to women that he made money. Having a good job, or money in the bank doesn't mean anything if you will be a miser and live in a run down apartment. So the first level of advice, if you are a miser, would be to spend money on yourself.

Travel to different countries. Join up a site like "loveme.com" where you can go on socials overseas to meet Ukranian women (who can pass for white), Philipeans (more exotic), and Latin countries (who can pass for white). Fix up your vacation dates to travel to meet women. Then when a woman meets a foreigner, like yourself, with a good job they will be 10 hbs on to you like bees to honey.

The second thing you could do is buy a nice car that is known as a chick magnet. Like a 700 series BMW, a Hummer, or better yet, hire a Limosine driver, so now you look like you are loaded and you'll be bound to get attention for sure. You can also get gold chains, bracelets, wear stuff that shows wealth and hang out at exclusive type clubs.

You should also take up exotic hobbies like flying a Cesna airplane, para-gliding, etc... to build up your "adventure" profile so that you can appear more exciting.

So, I think having money is great if you are not a miser, but if you are a miser, you may as well be broke.

Well, if you have money, you have plenty of hb10 escorts that will take care of you so what are you complaining about? Go to Amsterdam or the Dominican Republics and then approach women in the Red Light booths or that are working down there and practise approaching them. Also flash some bills and smile while doing so. See, money answers all of your problems.

Troll?
 

corrector

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garruk said:
Aside from that, its important to realize that just having the career is a small part of being a person. I take pride in my career but i take pride in my physique and the hours ive spent at the gym as well. i take pride in my social network, my hobbies, etc.
Until you lose your job and join the 99%
 

ArcBound

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Part of confidence is being proud of the things you've done/ things you are doing. If you are genuinely proud of how much money you are making, about the type of work you do, then you will naturally show it off, let it become a part of you and people will see that and perceive that as confidence.
 

lolwut

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AreYouSingleFemale said:
I have a high paying engineering job but that fact doesn't make it any easier to approach a 10 when I see one. Despite the fact that she might be a college student earning nothing and doing an useless Arts course. Any thoughts?

have money?

buy nice cloth, by luxury watches,belts, buy a luxury car.

you will get more attention with women -> external validation.

it will help you feel more confident.

i know they will tell you that confidence gained from external validation isn't true confidence but we all gotta start somewhere. fake confidence is better than no confidence
 

zekko

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AreYouSingleFemale said:
I have a high paying engineering job but that fact doesn't make it any easier to approach a 10 when I see one. Despite the fact that she might be a college student earning nothing and doing an useless Arts course. Any thoughts?
If you're having trouble approaching then you need more experience with that.

I'm going to disagree with some of the others here:
Having a good career and a high paying job makes you a high value man.
You just need to realize that. Just like the girl's looks makes her high value.
You are a catch. It SHOULD be a source of confidence for you. How would you feel if you were unemployed and had no prospects or marketable skills? Men derive a lot of their self worth from their career, it's just a fact.

I would actually urge you NOT to go out and buy a Rolex and a lot of expensive things. Keep your money, save and invest for the future. That's waaaay more meaningful than some materialistic trappings.

You just need more experience with women to capitalize on all that. Go out and get it.
 

backbreaker

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zekko said:
If you're having trouble approaching then you need more experience with that.

I'm going to disagree with some of the others here:
Having a good career and a high paying job makes you a high value man.
You just need to realize that. Just like the girl's looks makes her high value.
You are a catch. It SHOULD be a source of confidence for you. How would you feel if you were unemployed and had no prospects or marketable skills? Men derive a lot of their self worth from their career, it's just a fact.

I would actually urge you NOT to go out and buy a Rolex and a lot of expensive things. Keep your money, save and invest for the future. That's waaaay more meaningful than some materialistic trappings.

You just need more experience with women to capitalize on all that. Go out and get it.
:):yes:
 
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zekko said:
I would actually urge you NOT to go out and buy a Rolex and a lot of expensive things. Keep your money, save and invest for the future. That's waaaay more meaningful than some materialistic trappings.
That seems to make sense to me. Buying an expensive car for parking lot gaming, lol?

corrector said:
You should also take up exotic hobbies like flying a Cesna airplane, para-gliding, etc... to build up your "adventure" profile so that you can appear more exciting.

So, I think having money is great if you are not a miser, but if you are a miser, you may as well be broke.

Well, if you have money, you have plenty of hb10 escorts that will take care of you so what are you complaining about? Go to Amsterdam or the Dominican Republics and then approach women in the Red Light booths
Why is corrector so incorrect? Fly planes, do adventures and then go to a hooker?
 
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