How to deal with this girl after No Contact?

fidel

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Ok, some more updates in case some one wishes to reply. I kinda need a little help now.

So, after the last update where she stopped talking for 10 days, I continued being aloof and minding my own business. Right enough, 4-5 days later she comes up to talk again. Again casual talk about what's going on in our lives but then she starts being slightly rude regarding my appearance. This continued for 2-3 times more, and I laughed it off. It honestly doesn't bother me but I'm not really sure where's she going with it. I can tell for a fact that she is suddenly insecure but I don't see a real reason for mocking how I look. Snide comments like I better find a girl soon for my looks aren't going to get better are unnecessary.

I don't wish to be rude to her but I don't know how to react.

Any one care to comment?
 

fidel

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It does seem like she wants me to ask her out, but I'm very cautious (overly) to not let her reject me again, and out of that fear, I'm maybe holding back a touch too much. She's behaving close to how she was when we met first (an unmistakeable friendly, confident attitude - it's what attracted me to her), but I get the feeling her sudden nitpicking about my appearance will annoy me eventually. Heck, I'm thinking about it more now that I'm writing about it. :).

Part of me needs more validation that this is genuine interest, and not something that's just come up because she can't bear the thought of being alone on that infamous day that's around the corner.

Just wanted some more reassurance that playing the waiting game is still good and I'm not missing any obvious signs.
 

Tictac

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It does seem like she wants me to ask her out, but I'm very cautious (overly) to not let her reject me again, and out of that fear, I'm maybe holding back a touch too much. She's behaving close to how she was when we met first (an unmistakeable friendly, confident attitude - it's what attracted me to her), but I get the feeling her sudden nitpicking about my appearance will annoy me eventually. Heck, I'm thinking about it more now that I'm writing about it. :).

Part of me needs more validation that this is genuine interest, and not something that's just come up because she can't bear the thought of being alone on that infamous day that's around the corner.

Just wanted some more reassurance that playing the waiting game is still good and I'm not missing any obvious signs.
Fear, validation, reassurance - your own words. You're acting like a woman.
 

Dealler

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Ask her out then?
This is to painfull to not reply so i had to sign up to add my two cents.

Dude, you´re giving too much *****. You need to undestand that you can´t have everything under your control. There is only one way to find out if it´s genuine interest or not. Ask her out. It seems like she´s playing with you so you need to solve it ASAP before she drives you insane. Fvck whatever she might think, do things that serve you. It´s that simple - ask her out, if she agrees, fine. Go hang out with her, try to get intimate (touching) and you´ll see her reaction. She won´t stand in your way if she attracted to you. And don´t act like she´s something special cuz she´s not. If thing won´t go well, there´s nothing to be done anymore, break off any contact FOREVER. It will just slow you down in process of finding new girls.
 

fidel

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This is to painfull to not reply so i had to sign up to add my two cents.

Dude, you´re giving too much *****. You need to undestand that you can´t have everything under your control. There is only one way to find out if it´s genuine interest or not. Ask her out. It seems like she´s playing with you so you need to solve it ASAP before she drives you insane. Fvck whatever she might think, do things that serve you. It´s that simple - ask her out, if she agrees, fine. Go hang out with her, try to get intimate (touching) and you´ll see her reaction. She won´t stand in your way if she attracted to you. And don´t act like she´s something special cuz she´s not. If thing won´t go well, there´s nothing to be done anymore, break off any contact FOREVER. It will just slow you down in process of finding new girls.
Welcome to the forum!!! Glad you joined. Every advice is useful.

This is what I had done, right? I have not initiated contact even once since she turned hostile. It is worse since we live in the same apartment complex. Hence the question all those months ago if I should move out. Well, I'm going to try and ask her out.

Thanks for the replies guys and for being patient. I know I'm super beta but hopefully I get better with time. At the very least I've learned to enjoy life without thinking about her too much. I was a wreck those initial couple of months.
 

Speculator E

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Ask her out then?
Dude. You fear rejection or something? I just noticed this thread is 7 months old. What have you been doing the past 7 months. You need to go out and ask a bunch of random girls out and expect them to reject you. Maybe after 10 or so rejections, you'll see that it's not so bad.

Valentines Day is coming up. Ask her out if she wants to hang out then. She's probably expecting you to. This is your last chance if you like her. If you don't she'll go auto-rejection on you.
 

fidel

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Dude. You fear rejection or something? I just noticed this thread is 7 months old. What have you been doing the past 7 months. You need to go out and ask a bunch of random girls out and expect them to reject you. Maybe after 10 or so rejections, you'll see that it's not so bad.

Valentines Day is coming up. Ask her out if she wants to hang out then. She's probably expecting you to. This is your last chance if you like her. If you don't she'll go auto-rejection on you.
I guess this is the problem I have with her, not with girls in general. I did actually date a girl for a like 2 months in the interim, but it was more out of moving on from her than anything else.
 
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How do you deal with her? You don't. You got nothing with her dude. That's just the reality of the situation.

Work on improving yourself as a man first, and then you'll have no problem moving further with girls in the future.

Make good use of the resources on sosuave.com and our Don Juan Bible. Great places to start.
 

Speculator E

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I guess this is the problem I have with her, not with girls in general. I did actually date a girl for a like 2 months in the interim, but it was more out of moving on from her than anything else.
That's why sociopaths are alpha males and get gf's. They don't worry about or lack of any fear about asking a girl out. I'm sure you know how to ask a girl out since you've done it before. You just need to find your courage.
 

fidel

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Tough crowd. Thanks for the replies guys. Appreciate it.
 

fidel

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Last update folks.

He'll never know. He doesn't have the balls.
I do know now. I did ask her out for VD and she said she doesn't feel we have any connection and she's dating another guy in my same apartment complex. I've recently seen them around a lot, especially the last two weeks, and I don't think she's lying or making this up to get me jealous or whatever. I know the guy casually (friend of a friend) and so this can get awkward for me at weekend hangouts or whatever. Guess, her coming up to me, insulting me, was all just because of her insecure nature. She was probably having a bad day or two and who better than me to take it out on. Waited too long and wasted way too much time on this one. Feels terrible right now.
 

salinechow

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I am speechless. The whone time, through every response I am asking myself. "Where are his other plates???" "Why is he not mentioning other plates? "

This was a total disaster and after the last post, I really felt bad for you. You acted so so puzzy this whole time. You had opportunities. I'm just at a loss. I hate for you that you painted yourself into this corner.

Please 1000percent move on from her in every respect. Date MULTIPLE other girls and maybe when this chick breaks up with her BF!!! You can comfort her in your bed.

I hate seeing this happen to guys. Having a few other girls to be talking with, dating, and thinking about, would have helped. What were you doing with Tinder? How were you not going out on dates like 3 nights a week? Imy so lost how this can happen to a man. I'm sorry bro. Never behave anything like this again. Please let that be the silver lining to this horrid tale.
 

fidel

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I am speechless. The whone time, through every response I am asking myself. "Where are his other plates???" "Why is he not mentioning other plates? "

This was a total disaster and after the last post, I really felt bad for you. You acted so so puzzy this whole time. You had opportunities. I'm just at a loss. I hate for you that you painted yourself into this corner.

Please 1000percent move on from her in every respect. Date MULTIPLE other girls and maybe when this chick breaks up with her BF!!! You can comfort her in your bed.

I hate seeing this happen to guys. Having a few other girls to be talking with, dating, and thinking about, would have helped. What were you doing with Tinder? How were you not going out on dates like 3 nights a week? Imy so lost how this can happen to a man. I'm sorry bro. Never behave anything like this again. Please let that be the silver lining to this horrid tale.
Where I messed up worse (and what I didn't reveal earlier) was that I called it off with that other girl I dated just after this one sent out feelers again. Thought to myself, that I should try one more time and get this to work before dating someone else.

I've not had much luck in Tinder. I've told myself I'm going to be joining some classes over the next few weeks in the hope of meeting people.
 

EyeBRollin

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Where I messed up worse (and what I didn't reveal earlier) was that I called it off with that other girl I dated just after this one sent out feelers again. Thought to myself, that I should try one more time and get this to work before dating someone else.
If you were a car salesmen, and a customer walked into the dealership that was unsure of if they wanted to buy, would you kick out all the other potential customers out of the dealership?

It's all numbers.

I've not had much luck in Tinder. I've told myself I'm going to be joining some classes over the next few weeks in the hope of meeting people.
Take a shirtless pic to show your abs. If you don't have any, get some. Until then, stay off tinder.
 

salinechow

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Take a shirtless pic to show your abs. If you don't have any, get some. Until then, stay off tinder.


Absolutely not true. I understand what you are saying, but from experience, and field reports this is not true. Im going to open a thread about it.
 

Speculator E

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Bro, It's time to move on. You did what you could. You asked her she declined and you know she has a boyfriend now. This is ten times better then wasting your times wondering if you hadn't asked her. Now be free and go find other chicks.
 
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