How to Control Your Wife's Behavior by Being a Pack Leader

[Luthor Rex]

I was trolling the interwebs and found this posted by a Christian wife. Seems reasonable enough.

How to Control Your Wife's Behavior by Being a Pack Leader

Is your wife doing a behavior that you don't approve of? Does she pull
you around? Do you feel that you can't control her? Is it hard to
take items (pretty things) away from her without being bitten (not
literally of course)?To solve all the symptoms, we must get to the
root of the matter. Your wife is most likely thinking that she is the
pack leader, or at least she is confused about who is the pack leader.
When you claim leadership, the wife is free and content to be a happy
willing follower.

1. Good Reasons to be a Pack Leader

• Your wife will remain well-behaved, even around other women who may or
• may not be.
• Your wife will learn to respect your possessions.
• Reduces constant barking (or whining).
• Your wife will be less anxious and nervous.
• Your wife will be happier and more content

.
2. Learn to Think like a Woman

• Realize that there are some areas where women do think like men, and
  some areas where they do not. This is important because often men will
  reinforce negative behavior without knowing it.
• Realize that women live in the present much more than men do. Just
  because a woman has done something for a while, doesn't mean that she
  can't change. In the same way, just because a woman has had a tough
  upbringing, or might have been abused, doesn't mean that she can't be
  rehabilitated into a loving, calm wife.
• Women do not have guilt or pity in their mindsets/thinking. If a man
  expresses these emotions, a woman will interpret them as weakness.
  Women can be given affection without being touched. A look can also
  convey affection.
• Women have different levels of excitability that they progress
  through. A problem woman that goes into a frenzy in certain situations
  cannot be corrected when she has reached her highest level of
  intensity. You must correct at the lower levels to prevent her from
  becoming out of control.

3. Learn the Pack Mentality

• Women have a pack mentality (or herd mentality). If you have a wife,
  you are a member of the same pack that she is.
• If a husband shows weakness when he first brings her into their pack,
  the wife will often try to become the pack leader herself.
• There will always be a pack leader. If you make sure that it is you,
  then you'll be able to control your wife in any situation because they
  will look to you to see how they should react.
• A woman will try to become the pack leader if no one else is.
• Consider women in a pack (think women and their girlfriend cliques;
  think how one woman in that group always tends to be the leader and
  the other women follow whatever she does). Women are happier when they
  know their place in the pack. Your wife will be more content and happy
  when you consistently behave like a pack leader. If you allow your
  wife to be leader in the home, but want to be the leader in other
  areas, you will frustrate your wife. (The trick, as a husband, is
  becoming that one popular woman in the girlfriend clique who she will
  follow around).

A pack leader ... (I recognize some of these are more a wife's
realm, deciding about dinner, etc.)

• Decides where the pack will go.
• Decides when the pack will eat.
• Decides who gets what food.
• Decides who is allowed to bark (whine) and when (if at all).
• Decides when the pack is allowed to play (decides when to separate
  business from pleasure).
• Decides what the pack is allowed to play with (decides who are
  appropriate friends that will exert good influences).
• Decides how other members of the pack must behave (decides how the
  family should behave).
• Decides who owns what.
• The rest of the pack is not resentful of how this works. To them, it
  is normal. If you modify your behavior to fit to this model (when
  relating to your wife), your wife will be content because her pack is
  working the way her instincts say it should. ( I think that is
  particularly interesting, about how her instincts say it should work,
  NOT how society says it should).
• When pack leaders correct children in their pack, they are rarely
  aggressive, but just assertive. Men must learn this combination of
  calm assertiveness to master their role as the pack leader

4. Be Calm and Assertive When Dealing with Your Wife

• Assertive is different than aggressive.
  If your wife knows voice commands, use them:
• Only in firm tones.
• Don't use a high-pitched voice.
• Don't speak in a cutesy voice, like you would to a baby.
• Do not speak in anger.
• Don't say it as if you are asking the wife a question.
• If you give a command and you know your wife is purposefully ignoring
  you, stop giving the command, you're just making it worse.
• If you have seen Star Wars, the "Jedi mind trick" is a good example of
  calm assertiveness. Not the waving of hands, but the firmness and
  calmness of the tone of voice.

5. Be the Pack Leader

• A less dominant man can become the leader of many much larger and
  stronger woman. It is a matter of attitude, not physical power or
  strength.
  Ways you can convey to your wife that you are the pack leader:
• Exit the house first when you go out. Enter first when you go in.
• Sit at the head of the table.
• Let your wife know what behaviors you, as the pack leader, don't like.
• Be consistent to correct any behavior that you don't want. Your wife
  will be confused if sometimes you correct her, and sometimes you
  don't.

Other Tips

• Be assertive, but not aggressive.
• Do not yell at your wife. If you think you have to, you are doing
  something wrong.
• Share affection as much as you want, but only when your wife is in a
  calm, submissive state of mind.
• Women usually want to please men. Be consistent, so they understand
  what you expect of them.
• Be consistent. It will help your wife learn more quickly, and help
  them to trust you.

 

[carrot]

So you have to be leader in HOME as well ?

most women lead in Interior design/furniture/choices
-=-=
If you allow your
wife to be leader in the home, but want to be the leader in other
areas, you will frustrate your wife.
-=-=

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

I am the Wife-Whisperer.

 

[mrRuckus]

So you have to be leader in HOME as well ?

most women lead in Interior design/furniture/choices

If you hired a decorator, you'd follow her advice mostly but you're still paying her to do what you want in the end, and she's still servicing your wants and needs.

LET her decorate your house and say no to what you don't like. Women "lead" in this stuff because guys don't lead themselves. It's just like the article says. She'll try to lead if you don't. I have women try this decorating crap on MY PLACE on me. "Let's go get so and so it'll look good here." 'No.' I sometimes go along with some of it, but nothing I don't want to happen happens in my own freakin house.

 

[Kailex]

I am the Wife-Whisperer.

It is pretty much the same thing, word for word almost, isn't it?
Just substitute the word Dog for Wife.

 

[Atom Smasher]

"Women do not have guilt or pity in their mindsets/thinking..."

What does this mean exactly?

 

[sharkbeat]

I am the Wife-Whisperer.

Rub her behind the ears. "There there. Good wife. Aren't you a good wife? aren't you a good wife? Here, suck my ****."

:crazy: :crackup:

Even the ad tells you how to train dogs.

 

[PokerStar]

I am the Wife-Whisperer.

sig worthy!

 

[azanon]

Hey, I'm a Cesar Millan fan like many people, but one can take that a bit too far. Cesar must have said humans and dog behavior don't work the same at least 100 times on the show.

 

[Luthor Rex]

nevermind

 

[Slickster]

You forgot to mention that your dog *ahem* I mean wife needs to be walked daily.

 

[sharkbeat]

nevermind

I think the article does make some key important points. All of these things are instinct driven. If husband can't control wife, it is more likely for the wife to go ballistic and hose the entire house with her emotional shotgun, just like a dog without a master tends to get very nervous.

The funny thing is, men take this emotional outburst personally, and do blame women personally for this. There are sometimes situations where the best cure is to hug her and say nothing, and forget it ever happened. The presence of a man can regulate female hormones. However, once a man loses that control, it is really hard to get that control back.

Women can be stupidly loyal, but also can be horribly heartless.

 

[Luthor Rex]

I think the article does make some key important points. All of these things are instinct driven. If husband can't control wife, it is more likely for the wife to go ballistic and hose the entire house with her emotional shotgun, just like a dog without a master tends to get very nervous.

The funny thing is, men take this emotional outburst personally, and do blame women personally for this. There are sometimes situations where the best cure is to hug her and say nothing, and forget it ever happened. The presence of a man can regulate female hormones. However, once a man loses that control, it is really hard to get that control back.

Women can be stupidly loyal, but also can be horribly heartless.

Oh I didn't mean "nevermind about the article", I posted a reply and see someone else said what I was going to say, so I removed my reply and said "nevermind instead".

 

[jophil28]

You forgot to mention that your dog *ahem* I mean wife needs to be walked daily.

And if she messes up or pisses you off , make her sleep in the garage ?

How about getting her microchipped - she might think twice before she steps out on you .

 

[backbreaker]

bow wow wow yippie yo yippie yay bow wow yippie yo yippie yay

 

[Luthor Rex]

If I felt like I had to "control" someone's behavior, I'd sure as hell not marry her.

When I was much younger I assumed such a thing too. Without knowing I bought into feminism I believed that women and men were equal and how you deal with one you can deal with the other. I also assumed that if you had a problem with a woman in your life you could talk to her rationally and discuss your problems. Basically I assumed that women were rational actors.

My experience since then has changed my beliefs about such things. I no longer assume that anyone is a rational actor.

 

[catman]

If I felt like I had to "control" someone's behavior, I'd sure as hell not marry her. Amen brother I will add if and when they step out of line and refuse to do what is right in your mind its time to say "GET THE FVCK OUT OUT OF MY HOUSE!! Change the locks and never ever look back.If you marry a controlling woman expect to be controlled!!!!

 

[Luthor Rex]

I will add if and when they step out of line and refuse to do what is right in your mind its time to say "GET THE FVCK OUT OUT OF MY HOUSE!!

Then you should expect to lose every relationship you are in.

 

[Sandow]

I agree with the post, but herding and companion types are very different. Especially the schnauzer group.

 

[Nutz]

I am the Wife-Whisperer.

Original article is gone. Here's the repost:

http://fullofgraceseasonedwithsalt.blogspot.com/2010/06/wife-whisperer-is-back.html