Master of the Universe
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2002
- Messages
- 396
- Reaction score
- 12
Alright DJs, Master DJs, and DJs in training... Today I'm going to share with you the most successful and effective method I've found for "closing the sale" and getting that gorgeous girl to go out with you.
What I'm going to share with you is the "How To," not just the philosophy behind it. I kid you not, what I'm going to share with you is so powerful, that it has only failed me twice in the last 6 years...
First though, here is the true story in how I "discovered" this secret...
All of my life, I have been involved in sales and marketing, and judging from results, I am good at what I do. Back when I was 18 years old, I was at work doing what I normally do... working and trying to make a sale. Back then I was very confident, but unbelievable naive. (I actually went out on a date, and the girl was rubbing her legs and thighs all over mine while eating dinner, and I was wondering if she had an itch... unbelievable).
Anyway, there was this 28-year-old drop-dead gorgeous girl who normally worked in another city, and whom was working for that day with us. All the guys were buzzing around her like flies around sh*t, and for that matter, so was I.
Evening was approaching, and I was getting hungry. I figured that she must be hungry also, since neither of us had had anything to eat for some while. So as I was talking with her, I told her "I'm hungry, and I'm guessing so are you. Would you like to go to dinner, or would you like me to get us something to eat." Since I was so naive, I really thought I was asking her to eat, not asking her on a date.
However, she took it to mean that I was asking her out (which I sure as hell wasn't going to argue with her about). Then she turned to me and said, "You know, I liked the way you asked me out. I don't think anyone has ever asked me that way before. Instead of asking whether or not I wanted to eat with you, you automatically assumed that I would and you gave me a choice of how I would like to do it." Then I looked at her and said, "Hey, that's right!" Since she had been involved in sales longer than I have, she automatically noticed that I had utilized the number one rule that any sales or marketing person worth his weight in salt knows. And that is…
Assume The Sale
One of the first things they teach you in sales (and which many people forget and extremely few apply to asking girls out) is that you should never ask a potential customer if he wants to buy the widget, but rather if he wants a blue widget or a red widget, a 4” widget or a 6” widget, etc. Basically, as long as you don’t ask him if he wants to buy a widget or not, he cannot decline to purchase - you never gave him that option.
Anyway, I went out with that girl, and had a wonderful time. But the most important thing I got from that, was the lesson in the power of “Assuming the Sale.”
So how do you apply that to your dating life? Simple. First you find a girl who is giving you the signals that she might be interested. You go to her and start talking about whatever you want. I’m not going to get into how to approach a girl here since it would be beyond the scope of this Tip, plus there are plenty of advice in the DJ Bible on that subject.
Now, the most important part of the whole process is the approach, since that allows you to “put your foot in the door.” However, other than the approach, and in some cases more important than the approach, is the close.
Here what the average non-DJ does… He finds the perfect girl, goes and talks to her (if he gets this far), and finally asks the girl if she wants to have dinner. If you were to do this, which just about everyone does, then at that point you would have lost control of the situation. You have given her the option of dismissing you. Bad idea.
Instead, let’s assume you’ve spoken with her. You’ve picked up on some positive vibes, and you think she might be interested. Don’t ask her if she wants to have dinner. While being sincere, tell her “I enjoyed our conversation. Why don’t we continue it later on this week. Would you prefer to have lunch or dinner together?” AND DON’T SAY ANYTHING AT THIS POINT.
This is important, as the first person to speaks “loses,” Even if it takes a full minute, just look straight at her confidently and sincerely, and preferably in her eyes until she answers. In 70% to 80% of the time, if you have read the signs right, she will choose one or the other. Congratulations, you have a date. Get her number and call her a couple of days later to make arrangements (and when you call her up on the phone, don’t tell her “So are we still on for lunch” “Instead say, I look forward to our lunch. Would you like me to pick you up, or would you like to meet there." Or “Do you prefer Mexican or Chinese?” You get the hint.
If for some reason she starts making objections when you give her the option between lunch or dinner at the initial encounter, don’t lose faith. Objections are the human way of saying “I’m interested, but not yet sold.” That’s okay, don’t push it. Just keep up with your conversation, showing her how cool of a guy you are, and when you feel the time is right ask her, “Let’s go do something together in a few days. Do you enjoy bowling more or miniature golf? Bowling, then it’s a date! Give me your phone number and I’ll call you to finalize the plans.”
As you may have noticed above, I didn’t ask her for her phone number. I *told* her to give it to me. Respectfully yes, but I didn’t ask. Why? Simple, people are trained from school to follow directions. If you ask her for her phone number, then there is a chance she might still change her mind about bowling. But by politely telling her to give you her number, and by having the confidence to fully expect that she will give it to you, she will have no choice but to do just that.
As you can see, the principal of “Assuming the Sale” not only works when selling cars and stereos, but when asking girls out. In six year of using it, it has failed me only twice.
The biggest tip I can offer in using it though, is that you must have conviction in your eyes and in your tone of voice that she will accept one of your two choice. As the saying goes, “he who hesitates is lost.”
Well, I hope you get as much benefit from this as I did. And if at first it doesn’t work like expected… that’s okay, just keep practicing… believe me, it’s worth it.
Now, if you liked my posting, I would like to ask you for help in turn. Right now I find myself in a difficult situation when it comes to a certain girl, and I really need your help - FAST. So please go to the General Discussion Forum and look for the thread titled, “Need help... before it's too late” I can use your help and advice.
Thank you fellow DJs…
Master of the Universe
[This message has been edited by Master of the Universe (edited 01-18-2002).]
What I'm going to share with you is the "How To," not just the philosophy behind it. I kid you not, what I'm going to share with you is so powerful, that it has only failed me twice in the last 6 years...
First though, here is the true story in how I "discovered" this secret...
All of my life, I have been involved in sales and marketing, and judging from results, I am good at what I do. Back when I was 18 years old, I was at work doing what I normally do... working and trying to make a sale. Back then I was very confident, but unbelievable naive. (I actually went out on a date, and the girl was rubbing her legs and thighs all over mine while eating dinner, and I was wondering if she had an itch... unbelievable).
Anyway, there was this 28-year-old drop-dead gorgeous girl who normally worked in another city, and whom was working for that day with us. All the guys were buzzing around her like flies around sh*t, and for that matter, so was I.
Evening was approaching, and I was getting hungry. I figured that she must be hungry also, since neither of us had had anything to eat for some while. So as I was talking with her, I told her "I'm hungry, and I'm guessing so are you. Would you like to go to dinner, or would you like me to get us something to eat." Since I was so naive, I really thought I was asking her to eat, not asking her on a date.
However, she took it to mean that I was asking her out (which I sure as hell wasn't going to argue with her about). Then she turned to me and said, "You know, I liked the way you asked me out. I don't think anyone has ever asked me that way before. Instead of asking whether or not I wanted to eat with you, you automatically assumed that I would and you gave me a choice of how I would like to do it." Then I looked at her and said, "Hey, that's right!" Since she had been involved in sales longer than I have, she automatically noticed that I had utilized the number one rule that any sales or marketing person worth his weight in salt knows. And that is…
Assume The Sale
One of the first things they teach you in sales (and which many people forget and extremely few apply to asking girls out) is that you should never ask a potential customer if he wants to buy the widget, but rather if he wants a blue widget or a red widget, a 4” widget or a 6” widget, etc. Basically, as long as you don’t ask him if he wants to buy a widget or not, he cannot decline to purchase - you never gave him that option.
Anyway, I went out with that girl, and had a wonderful time. But the most important thing I got from that, was the lesson in the power of “Assuming the Sale.”
So how do you apply that to your dating life? Simple. First you find a girl who is giving you the signals that she might be interested. You go to her and start talking about whatever you want. I’m not going to get into how to approach a girl here since it would be beyond the scope of this Tip, plus there are plenty of advice in the DJ Bible on that subject.
Now, the most important part of the whole process is the approach, since that allows you to “put your foot in the door.” However, other than the approach, and in some cases more important than the approach, is the close.
Here what the average non-DJ does… He finds the perfect girl, goes and talks to her (if he gets this far), and finally asks the girl if she wants to have dinner. If you were to do this, which just about everyone does, then at that point you would have lost control of the situation. You have given her the option of dismissing you. Bad idea.
Instead, let’s assume you’ve spoken with her. You’ve picked up on some positive vibes, and you think she might be interested. Don’t ask her if she wants to have dinner. While being sincere, tell her “I enjoyed our conversation. Why don’t we continue it later on this week. Would you prefer to have lunch or dinner together?” AND DON’T SAY ANYTHING AT THIS POINT.
This is important, as the first person to speaks “loses,” Even if it takes a full minute, just look straight at her confidently and sincerely, and preferably in her eyes until she answers. In 70% to 80% of the time, if you have read the signs right, she will choose one or the other. Congratulations, you have a date. Get her number and call her a couple of days later to make arrangements (and when you call her up on the phone, don’t tell her “So are we still on for lunch” “Instead say, I look forward to our lunch. Would you like me to pick you up, or would you like to meet there." Or “Do you prefer Mexican or Chinese?” You get the hint.
If for some reason she starts making objections when you give her the option between lunch or dinner at the initial encounter, don’t lose faith. Objections are the human way of saying “I’m interested, but not yet sold.” That’s okay, don’t push it. Just keep up with your conversation, showing her how cool of a guy you are, and when you feel the time is right ask her, “Let’s go do something together in a few days. Do you enjoy bowling more or miniature golf? Bowling, then it’s a date! Give me your phone number and I’ll call you to finalize the plans.”
As you may have noticed above, I didn’t ask her for her phone number. I *told* her to give it to me. Respectfully yes, but I didn’t ask. Why? Simple, people are trained from school to follow directions. If you ask her for her phone number, then there is a chance she might still change her mind about bowling. But by politely telling her to give you her number, and by having the confidence to fully expect that she will give it to you, she will have no choice but to do just that.
As you can see, the principal of “Assuming the Sale” not only works when selling cars and stereos, but when asking girls out. In six year of using it, it has failed me only twice.
The biggest tip I can offer in using it though, is that you must have conviction in your eyes and in your tone of voice that she will accept one of your two choice. As the saying goes, “he who hesitates is lost.”
Well, I hope you get as much benefit from this as I did. And if at first it doesn’t work like expected… that’s okay, just keep practicing… believe me, it’s worth it.
Now, if you liked my posting, I would like to ask you for help in turn. Right now I find myself in a difficult situation when it comes to a certain girl, and I really need your help - FAST. So please go to the General Discussion Forum and look for the thread titled, “Need help... before it's too late” I can use your help and advice.
Thank you fellow DJs…
Master of the Universe
[This message has been edited by Master of the Universe (edited 01-18-2002).]
