How to build a social circle?

gotballz

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 10, 2009
Messages
37
Reaction score
0
The question pretty much says evrythin...

but just to clarify this shyt... i wanna build my own social circle (like a bunch of guys chillin at the end of the week, chicks included).


I also wanna get into another social circle...a bunch of guys at my high school, the same grade as me, have been friends now for a few years... and i didnt really make the best first impression...but im kinda a funny guy... so how do i do
this?

For the deatils: theres about 20 of them but like 10 of them who hangout more with each other.

This is also to help me with social circle game
 

(JJ)

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 13, 2007
Messages
487
Reaction score
9
Think about what you like... and find the corresponding club! High school offers tons of opportunities like this, and soon enough, you'll have made some new friends. The people in clubs that you like are already more compatible with you than any random person off the street, which makes a friendship or any gaming that much easier. Soon after you make some friends, you'll go to parties and things, and meet friends of friends. Take this entire process and repeat the desired amount of times. Some people want a rolling army of friends. Others want a few close contacts. Just do what you wanna do.
 

valente

New Member
Joined
Jul 11, 2009
Messages
3
Reaction score
0
Location
Brazil
Maybe the question we should be asking is not how to build a better social circle or how to make more friends ( check out my thread later ).
We know that the key to that is to talk to more people ( kinda talking to myself here )
but
what should we do to convey more social value
how to do demonstrations of higher value
and how to get others interested in coming to talk to us instead of us going after them.

anyone got any thoughts on this?
 

ariet

Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2009
Messages
47
Reaction score
0
Location
Melbourne, Aus
you need some rules in your circle
you need to get closer to each person in the cirlcle and make them closer to each other by ( maybe sharing you weaknesses putting your trust in them if you believe they are trustworthy)
You need a common activity (like i play soccer with my friends on saturdays or you could have get-togethers)
dont let outsiders in make it just your guyses activity
 

tbhforever

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 1, 2009
Messages
20
Reaction score
0
its really hard to make your own. you should just try to get into the other one, become friends with a few of the guys, hang out with them a ton, eventually you will be exposed to the other friends.
dont rush it
if they smoke weed, its a great bonding activity
 

eaglez1177

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 24, 2008
Messages
1,320
Reaction score
21
I cant really give much advice on this, but I can tell you my story and how I managed to get more into a popular social circle.

Pretty much, you have to find a CORE group of best friends, and stick with them the entire time. This is exactly what I had my freshman and sophmore year in highschool, a core group of about 5 guys that I always hung out with, and from there me and another group member would kinda expand the circle by getting chicks from either our school or another school to chill with us (me and him had the best game.)

We then started to chill with another core group of best friends, except they were girls (and they were a year younger than us : /. But hey, its a start). So then, it pretty much came down to every weekend my core group of best friends and the core group of girls would hang out together, thus forming a larger "social circle".

At the beginning of junior year, things started to improve even more. I had been friends with a pretty popular kid on my football team, and as the year went on, we went from friends, to really good friends, to GREAT friends. I think one of the main things that played a major role in strengthening our friendship was the fact that we both smoke weed. It would start out like every few weeks we would txt each other to chill, and I would bring not all, but a few of my core group friends (the ones that blazed) to go smoke with this kid.

Eventually, it got to the point where every weekend we would be chilling out at least once to smoke weed, and eventually I (since I was closest to him of my friends) would get invited to the popular parties of the school that this kid went to. From there, I would invite him to some of our parties, which where a ton of fun. Then from there, he would start bringing some more of his popular friends to come chill with us.

And eventually, it all comes down to now. Now my friends and I can easily get into the popular parties (as opposed to freshman and sophmore year wen we couldnt), and, we're not hanging out with those girls who are a year younger than us. Now we're hanging out with chicks our age, and some of them are pretty fvcking hot!

My point is, it's all about progression and moving up the social ladder. Getting into social circles is a very slow process, and it all starts by one person (like me) branching off to become friends with someone more popular, and then strengthening that friendship until you and your own friends are "in" the social circle.
 

comic_relief

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 29, 2004
Messages
3,285
Reaction score
49
Location
Baltimore, MD
I'll give you my story.

When I was in 10th grade, I was the butt of all the jokes. Bullies made fun of me and then I went off for the summer.

I came back to 11th grade and self-improved myself chilling with a few good people/reading self-improvement literature. It was a solitary life that year.

After that, I went to 12th grade and started hanging out with one of my friends from the soccer team that I didn't really talk to that much. He introduced me to his really good friends and made a new set of friends for 12th grade where no one would bother me. I also got my first girlfriend, which was from a different place. I flourished like no one else did. I was charming to all of her friends and they loved me.

When college came into the picture, I was READY. I made a great social network out of my college groups by joining new clubs and visiting with new friends. I moved on with my life and made tons of friends.

Here is my pointers:
- Join the gym (lots of like minded men)
- go outside of your comfort zone
- go to new places that are usually quieter then clubs/bars (quieter places lets you actually talk)
- make sure to get contact information so you can still hang out afterwards
- Join clubs and activities from around the area (my best friends/girlfriends/FWBs) all come from my swing club that I am a part of :)

If the entire school has a bad impression of you, then going to a new place is usually a much better idea to make new friends. It's easier to start over with a blank slate, then to try and reinvent the wheel. Many people will flame me for saying it, but that is my experiences.

comic_relief
 
Top