How to better "think on your feet"?

[GatorBait]

I definitely consider myself a funny guy, I can come up with witty jokes and regularly make my friends laugh. However, when it comes to women I'm not real good at "thinking on my feet". When a girl says something that warrants a ****y/funny/witty reply, I'll follow up with a decent response, but then about 20-30 seconds later I'll come up with what would've been the perfect reply (but by then it's obviously too late).

Do you guys know any good exercises that can get me in the mindset to think in a ****y/funny way much quicker?

 

[GatorBait]

I think you are right about the confidence thing, because like you said, I'm easily the center of attention around friends and family. Also, good point about looking at it as the girl's job to impress me, instead of the other way around. I had totally forgotten about that rule (been away from the sarging community for way too long).

 

[GatorBait]

Remember that it's just a theory mate, I take no liability in this case for being wrong. Saying that it seems a reasonable idea in my head.

Haha, no problem. Anyone else have any ideas?

I know there have to be DJ's on this board that weren't real smooth at first, how'd you guys get better?

 

[Juan_Man]

Start talking to yourself regularly. I'm serious. It helps but don't do it when others are around. You get better at speaking and coming up with sharp things to say.

 

[milrenkb]

Online Chat. Also known as the Women Simulator.

"Napoleon, don't be jelous just because
I've been talking online to hot babes all day."

 

[milrenkb]

Actually you're onto something here.

Say you're watching TV on your own, and you see something worth commenting on, well comment on it. I've come out with some really funny remarks ranting at the TV, so I guess it helps me practise.

I enjoy watching sitcoms were relatonships are part of the story. During the course of the show I'll come up with responses to statements the women on the show make when they're interacting with a guy their intrested in (weather it be a husband, boyfriend, date, or a guy their just flirting with). I know its only TV but its also practice. A better way to describe it would be that for one line I'm a character on the show.

The shows I use are Friends, Everybody Loves Raymond, Seinfeld, Fraiser, Becker, and Cheers

 

[GatorBait]

I enjoy watching sitcoms were relatonships are part of the story. During the course of the show I'll come up with responses to statements the women on the show make when they're interacting with a guy their intrested in (weather it be a husband, boyfriend, date, or a guy their just flirting with). I know its only TV but its also practice. A better way to describe it would be that for one line I'm a character on the show.

The shows I use are Friends, Everybody Loves Raymond, Seinfeld, Fraiser, Becker, and Cheers

Awesome. I was actually thinking about doing the exact same thing! I can usually always think of witty things to say, but my response-time is a little slow. And as we all know, the key is to make it all seem smooth and natural.

 

[ChampusMaximus]

The main thing is just to get plenty of practice talking to girls and not to think about it too much. Time spent scrutinizing is time better spent practicing.

One thing that I realize that I do is watch a lot of standup comedy. Not because I think that it'll get me girls. I just watch because it's real fun to do.

 

[PRMoon]

Haha, no problem. Anyone else have any ideas?

I know there have to be DJ's on this board that weren't real smooth at first, how'd you guys get better?

Buy some books on lateral thinking and complete the puzzles as outlined. DO NOT CHEAT! I'm serious, cheating on them by reading the anwsers will do you no good, but if you read one and can't solve it immedeately, then do your very best to intepret every word in the puzzle in different ways. By doing this you train your mind to think outside the box and can often come up with clever responses for everyday situations quickly with little effort. This is the reason my psychiatrist gave to my parents for me being such a wise ass.

 

[Krassus]

There is only one way: practice. It'll both sharpen your creativity and eliminate fear (which blunts creativity).

 

[Zerotwoonenine]

yea david d's double your dating give some serious good tips about this.

 

[INXS]

I'd suggest buying or renting some Friends DVDs. Not because those actors are amazing or anything, but because they had the highest paid comedy writers alive doing that show!

Then just take something funny and apply it to your situation.

Quickie Tip:
With regard to following Friends, Chandler is a great character full of humor. However be careful because lots of his humor is aimed at putting himself down. Don't do that. Use your humor to either be a neg to the woman, or to build yourself up. If you poke fun at yourself, it just parades around the mindset that you think you don't deserve to be talking to that certain female.

And chances are if you display the mindset, you know what she is thinking right back? You don't deserve to be talking to her either.

Good luck.

 

[manbearpig]

I'm not funny period, whether I'm around other dudes or a chick.

I have a sense of humor, I laugh at other's jokes... and I can make jokes its just my sense of humor is a bit offbeat. I find myself funny but I can't seem to make others laugh.

 

[manbearpig]

You need to be a bit more upbeat, I believe that EVERYONE has the potential to be really funny, they just need to find out what humour works for them.

Okay.

 

[GatorBait]

Anyone watch the show House MD? I noticed today while watching an old episode of how good House is at immediately coming up with a witty retort. Granted, he's doesn't always have the funny delivery, but it can easily be adapted to the c&f style. Another example would be Christian from Nip/Tuck.

I think the first poster was right about it primarily being a confidence thing. I felt a little rusty at first, but today Summer B classes started here and I was chatting up the new girls all day long. Still gotta keep practicing though.

 

[realsmoothie]

It's definitely a confidence thing. I'm naturally a funny guy in a dry, sarcastic way... but before when I'd try to pull it off it would come out awkward because I was shy and would avoid eye contact.

You can't do C&F without eye contact. Trust me, I've been doing it for years and girls were thinking I was just being an *sshole. One girl I recently hooked up with - just a couple of days ago - told me that she hated me for six months because she thought i HATED her. The whole time I thought I was hitting on her. This was a year ago, and I have changed a lot since then.

As for the practicing on yourself in the mirror. GREAT TIP! I LOVE IT! I am going to go try that.

 

[GatorBait]

Yeah, it's quite easy for C+F to appear as bytchiness. Personally I like to give a cheeky smile if I think there's a high chance it's stepping over the line. Don't overdo the C+F though, or you WILL appear hostile.

I do the same thing. I give a little bit of a wry smile.

 

[Luke Skywalker]

Buy some books on lateral thinking and complete the puzzles as outlined. DO NOT CHEAT! I'm serious, cheating on them by reading the anwsers will do you no good, but if you read one and can't solve it immedeately, then do your very best to intepret every word in the puzzle in different ways. By doing this you train your mind to think outside the box and can often come up with clever responses for everyday situations quickly with little effort. This is the reason my psychiatrist gave to my parents for me being such a wise ass.

Great tip. I'm adopting this.

 

[Doggystyle]

Always remember while and before talking that she cares more about what your thinking of her than she thinks of you. Keep remembering that if you ever start worrying what she thinks. You should then feel more relaxed to express yourself like you would around your friends.

I know alot of people don't advocate it, but a few beers helps relax.

 

[Luke Skywalker]

I just reviewed the speed seduction website there - you know- the one with all those fancy anchronyms that was listed on the DJ bible section, and guess what I stumbled across?

If you cant think on your feet - then have this universal canned pick-up line:

"Hi, I've noticed something about you?"

She will say, or should say, what have you noticed?

This allows you time to think of something intelligent to say of what you have noticed. (her shoes, what she is reading, or anything that comes to mind even if it's stupid - the point is you did it, pat yourself on the back, you approached someone and said something original and spontaneous and that 'effect' is there)

The point is to approach without thinking what you are going to say, because once you start thinking, you start hesitating, psyching yourself out.