How to be the alpha male anywhere.

[Isko]

the way to be alpha is to CHOOSE TO BE ALPHA! every person decides their own ranking. if you choose to be alpha, you have to contend with the challenges from other people. Other dudes will joke with you, trying to tell you that they're the alpha, challenging you for top status. Their frames battle your frame. If you decide to be alpha in all situations it may mean that you have to FIGHT somebody! That's the main reason that people are afraid to be alpha, and why people respect those who can fight physically (tall, muscular, or combat-trained people.) Those people know that they can take the alpha spot and no one can call them on it, or they can threaten physical harm. But a good conversationalist, a.k.a. someone who always chooses to be alpha, can dominate most people into not fighting him. My natural-alpha friend (who is in the army) says that guys challenge him and act like douches to him a lot.. which hardly ever happens to me. That's because I haven't been being alpha... (since I've started being more alpha, I've almost gotten into 2 fights, actually... and gotten laid many times!)

YOU DECIDE whether to be alpha or not at all times. Never acquiesce or surrender your status as alpha male, no matter what. ALL the pickup artist stuff, like ****y and funny, flows naturally when you're alpha. This is pretty much the only thing you need to do. YOU NEED TO DECIDE that you're going to be the alpha male in every situation. Most guys are scared of doing this, because it means putting yourself out there PHYSICALLY and dominating other people. That's some REAL, heavy stuff at times. Just remember, NEVER back down. Even if someone points a gun at your head, your frame shouldn't go to "that guy is now the alpha", it should go to "I'm alpha, but this guy is pointing a gun at my head." That will allow you to make the best decisions.

There was this cashier who I hit on awkwardly; if I was to see her again I should be like "hey, did I hit on you last time I was here? I'm sorry, [this is where a beta would say something like "for that terrible come-on, you must be tired of that sort of thing"] you must have been thinking about me all night. I bet you had to change your pants."

Then, she'll give you a "**** test" which is actually a test of your alphaness. She'll try to reframe things to a way where you are a beta male. You just have to keep your frame of being alpha, and respond.

This just came to me, but it seems like a GREAT way to think in-field, because it's only one rule, so it's easy to apply. Just choose to be the alpha male in the room. Always. Always ****ing choose to be the alpha. You have the choice god damnit!

 

[Bloke]

Don't mean to choose your thread out of the lot, but all these Alpha threads are laughable.

1. Why would you give a **** ?
2. You either are, or are not. There's no pretending.

 

[teagan]

You either have the mentality or you don't. You can't choose to be a 'alpha' but you can choose to do something out of the ordinary that seems 'alpha'. By choosing to be 'alpha' you are pretending to be 'alpha' and then you have nothing but a false sense of confidence.

 

[Duffdog]

You either have the mentality or you don't. You can't choose to be a 'alpha' but you can choose to do something out of the ordinary that seems 'alpha'. By choosing to be 'alpha' you are pretending to be 'alpha' and then you have nothing but a false sense of confidence.

Good response!

History is full of examples of people thinking that they are the top dog when they never were on the inside. The moment that you have to try to be the alpha male, you are not. You should not have to try, ever.

 

[DJinTraining06]

You either have the mentality or you don't. You can't choose to be a 'alpha' but you can choose to do something out of the ordinary that seems 'alpha'. By choosing to be 'alpha' you are pretending to be 'alpha' and then you have nothing but a false sense of confidence.

So wat the hell, ur saying that u can't change who you are? Your basically who everyone says u are according to what your saying. If people think ur a nerd then you should just shut up and be a nerd. That's what ur basiclaly implying.

 

[Warrior74]

This is why Supreme preaches against that Alpha male bullshyt. A real alpha male is born that way. Go see some of the baddest motherfckers in prison. They would have been taking heads on a battlefield a couple of centuries ago and been running ****.

Supreme teaches being a Real Man instead of being alpha. You can't be Alpha, but you can be real. You can be strong, you can be confident, you can work to achieve all of that, using the power of your mind, hitting the gym hard and pushing yourself outside your comfort zone and learning from experience.

Focus on trying to be the best you can and being Real with yourself and who you are and you'll go a lot further.

 

[Connor99]

Alpha Male is simply a man who is powerful or in a high social position

And by powerful they don't mean just by physical strength

Donald trump(Love him or hate him) He's the ultimate Alpha Male.

Trump has tons of high social position.....People follow him and his advice

He's a leader and not a follower.

Just being macho doesn't make you an alpha male

 

[Voice]

I don't think you can't choose to be alpha, but you can choose to be your OWN MAN. Know who you are, know your values and don't yield them for anyone else. Do whatever the fvck you want to do and don't care what anyone thinks. Be who you are without letting anyone influence you. Do what makes you happy, don't depend on anyone or anything else to make you happy. This is what makes a man. This is what makes a leader. I like the term 'leader' much more than 'alpha male' any day.

I just figured this sh!t out thanks to that Blueprint Decoded audio series and damn I'm gonna start living this sh!t to the fullest.

 

[alwaysimproving7]

Alpha males are alpha because they went through the suck first in order to get there. This applies life and other obstacles not just trying to pick up girls. Remember that.

 

[Isko]

Yes, a lot of alpha males are now in prison. We live in a society where dominating by force isn't as easy as it was before laws and police. Verbal skills are the best way now.

Don't you all have friends who can verbally kick people's asses? They might have things going for them in life, or they might not, but they always seem like contenders for "guy in charge"? They can be counted on to be fighting for position, calling out stupid stuff that other contenders say. That doesn't mean they're bullying everyone, it just means that they always react like someone who thinks that they're the ****. If you diss them, they diss you back; you always feel like they're the man in charge, and if you didn't, it means there is someone around who is dominating them. If these guys are nice to you, it's out of consideration for your feelings; they aren't afraid of you. They just don't take **** from you.

I also have friends who are "little *****es." If someone tries to dominate them (which happens through jokes in social situations) they just react like, well.. little *****es. They don't defend themselves. All it takes is an attempt. These little *****es have accepted their place on the pecking order, and they don't want to get any higher.

"You can take the dog out of the fight, but you can't take the fight out of the dog"... This is the fight in the man. The fighting spirit. You only have to FIGHT (usually verbally) if your standing as alpha is threatened. Never let anyone get anything over on you.

Is Donald Trump more alpha than... I don't know.. Dave Chapelle? Trump has a ton of resources, so people pay attention to him even though he acts like a douchebag child, but Chapelle is charming and funny, and most people probably like him better as a person. Imagine if the two were butting heads; wouldn't that be awesome? It would be incredibly entertaining because comedians are good at dominating conversations by reframing things.

In reality, you can be rich and buff but still be a laughable wuss. All that takes is letting people order you around, and acting like a little *****. Well, it works in reverse, too: No matter what you really have going for you, if you do what the alpha male would do, then you ARE the alpha male.

And as to why be the alpha male... Why the **** not!? I'm not sure what you guys are envisioning as alpha male, but when I think of one, I think of a guy who is always having a good time, takes no **** from anyone, dishes **** out to those who deserve it, protects others when people are making fun of them unjustly, etc. Oh yeah, and women fantasize about him.

 

[Interceptor]

Alpha Males are accepted as Alpha because they dont NEED to impose their will on others. Meaning, they can be dominant, but dont need to be domineering.
Most guys think 'being more Alpha', which is a misunderstanding and doesnt actually exist, means just acting more like a d*ck. An arrogant ass hole. Thus, in their mind, by being aggressve proactively, it will mean , to their reasoning, other men wont fvck with them. But this is still a defensive, reactionary mechanism. It stems from FEAR.
Thats not being Alpha.

Also remember that as males , we will watch each other and look for your weaknesses. If you exhibit a need to dominate another male, or are arrogant and a bully, we will quickly realize that you are all show , no go.
In other words, its all an act. And your insecurity and need to be accepted, feared, and/or 'respected' is rooted in approval seeking.

Being Alpha means being exclusive, yes...but also being Inclusive.

An Alpha is a leader. One who is aware of himself, his surroundings, and the dynamics at play between people. But he doesnt force his leadership on people. Thus, people will place trust in him because of his skills, and character.
Needing others to 'follow' you is a weakness. Not a strength. If one is challenged, then with proper and accurate thinking we will review the situation and decide if its worth to fight. Some challenges are irrelevant, so we choose our battles wisely. Not out of cowardice, but out of shrewdness.
There is no need to antagonize others. But sometimes some types of men will intentionally seek one out and try to pick apart his armor and weaknesses. Its up to you to decide how and when to 'defend' yourself.
An Alpha is never bullied. Nor is he a bullier. He takes advantatge of opportunities, but has the sens to understand when to be opportunistic. Not to always be taking from someone else, not always a Win/Lose scenario.
These are very crucial concepts and they must be understood.

Thus, turning on a 'switch' and saying "Ill think Ill be more Alpha now" is woefully misguided, and rooted in insecurity and a fuzzy understanding of our masculine instincts.

Just work on being in touch with your masculine instincts.
The disconnect we experience is the basis of all of the anxieties, and any feelings of not measuring up and inadequacies we may feel.

Any insecurity that breeds this kind of approval seeking behavior (because youre looking to get a reaction, youre looking to 'get' from people, thus, manipulating them. This comes from the notion that one is disempowered. Thus, they strive to display that they have power, not realizing that theyre displaying a defense mechanism , not true internal power and self mastery. Thus an arrogant bully will never make alliances with solid high character men. Thus, the men who CAN make it happen and know who they are, and can walk the walk will NOT follow the male who pretends.Its just Reality. ) will be seen, and instinctively people will realize how badly this person wants to be accepted and seen in a certain manner. This is called self image manipulation.
And its a way of micro managing the way one is perceived by others. But this stems from ones deep rooted sense of inadequacy.


Anyway, long story short, RECONNECT to your masculine instincts, and use your talents, and skills for something higher and more far reaching....
Much of what we are discussing has never been actively, and comprehensively TAUGHT to us.
Only somehow felt and observed in different manifestations.
Be careful of clinging on to falsehoods. Make sure you learn how to trust yourself and your intution, and instincts.
The more you reconnect with your innermost deepest self, the more you will let go of illusions, and see Reality.

 

[Isko]

I agree with everything you just posted... I think what I was trying to say was that you should never hold back from being yourself. You should always speak your mind if you think it should be spoken. Always do what you think is right.

In my mind, that's what an alpha does. He's not some ****y ******* or dominating bully; just someone who isn't afraid of being powerful. He's confident and unapologetic, not nervous and stuttering, because he always does what he knows is right. Good post, Interceptor.

 

[Alle_Gory]

This is not a very alpha post. OP, you should take your own advice.

 

[eaglez1177]

This is not a very alpha post. OP, you should take your own advice.

Agreed.

 

[Isko]

This is not a very alpha post. OP, you should take your own advice.

Thanks for putting me back in the game Alle_Gory. That is a good example of what I was talking about in the original post.

This entire forum is here for people to learn how to get girls to have sex with them. Getting girls just happens to be a side-effect of being a complete person. Being the alpha male at all times is how a man becomes complete.

An alpha male CAN bully people into respecting him in some situations, but in most situations, that's not his best option, because people will resist being bullied. Obviously, if a person is insecure they will go overboard and fail at being alpha male.

If I was to stick with my beta male roots, I'd add that I AM kind of an insecure person. But I won't because that kind of thing is self-perpetuating: You're insecure as long as you think of yourself as insecure. I'm not insecure; there ain't **** anyone can say. The only motive I have with this post is advancing our learning.

 

[teagan]

DJinTraining06...I think Interceptor hasn't perfect explanation for what I was saying.

You cannot just think like one...you actually have to be one.

 

[speakeasy]

I don't understand the alpha-prison connection. As if there aren't a lot of beta males in jail. What about the child molesters and kiddy porn guys in jail. There's a lot of people in jail for who aren't alpha.

This is all dumb. Just learn confidence, respect and believe in yourself. Live your life to the fullest. I have little desire to dominate others or to be dominated. I work cooperatively with others, not out of fear, but because I want to. I'm not going to live in this narrow alpha-beta dichotomy.

 

[46and2aheadofme]

Alpha Males are accepted as Alpha because they dont NEED to impose their will on others. Meaning, they can be dominant, but dont need to be domineering.
Most guys think 'being more Alpha', which is a misunderstanding and doesnt actually exist, means just acting more like a d*ck. An arrogant ass hole. Thus, in their mind, by being aggressve proactively, it will mean , to their reasoning, other men wont fvck with them. But this is still a defensive, reactionary mechanism. It stems from FEAR.
Thats not being Alpha.

Just work on being in touch with your masculine instincts.
The disconnect we experience is the basis of all of the anxieties, and any feelings of not measuring up and inadequacies we may feel.

Any insecurity that breeds this kind of approval seeking behavior (because youre looking to get a reaction, youre looking to 'get' from people, thus, manipulating them. This comes from the notion that one is disempowered. Thus, they strive to display that they have power, not realizing that theyre displaying a defense mechanism , not true internal power and self mastery. Thus an arrogant bully will never make alliances with solid high character men.

I am really glad you made this distinction. What you describe is a spitting image of this friend (well kind of ex friend) of mine who upon your first interaction seems like an alpha male in all regards. He is a ripped macho type guy who is assertive and very social.

However, when you dig deep into his personality and actually get to know him, you realize every "macho" image he feeds people stems from an intense insecurity.

Because of this, he always displays this bravado which inclines him to put others down in order to make himself look better.

In his mind, he probably thinks he appears to be an alpha male to others. In fact, he is so concerned with whatever people think of him, his entire happiness and existence as a man is wholly dependent on how others think of him.

He is a vaguely good looking guy who you would think has a lot of success with women, but the funny thing is that women see right through his bullsh*t. This is because he is constantly trying to validate himself, therefore lowering his value in their eyes.

Basically you don't want to become this guy in pursuit of becoming an "alpha male". Doing so will greatly decrease your ability to attract women.

 

[ready123]

If you're trying to be alpha, you're the equivalent of the dude in the gym who grunts hella loud during his set and then looks around to see who noticed him. Or the wannabe thug who stares dudes down in the clubs trying to assert dominance. AKA you're a bigtime tryhard and it's obvioua to everyone but you

You wanna become alpha, you dont make a real-time choice. You get alpha by being open to life, undertaking challenges, stepping outside your comfort zone until you can look back and gauge all the unique things you've accomplished. You don't get that way by faking it.

Second, real alpha males don't impose it, they imply it. If you were a real alpha male, and it was cemented by your life history and abundance, would you really care about being able to frame control and dominate others?

Real alpha males are the easiest guys to get along with. Yet they're assertive enough to draw a boundary when they're being fvcked with. If you're modeling yourself after a caricature who tries to frame control everyone and ooze alphaness, think twice because you're gonna come across like a wierdo

 

[tarotale]

You either have the mentality or you don't. You can't choose to be a 'alpha' but you can choose to do something out of the ordinary that seems 'alpha'. By choosing to be 'alpha' you are pretending to be 'alpha' and then you have nothing but a false sense of confidence.

i disagree, man. i used to b a PU$$Y pretty big time, getting pushed around and letting ppl take advantage of me and ****. But i changed. i told ppl to **** off if they call on me and confronted them by fighting them. i never backed down although i still don have the 100% alphaness that naturals take guranteed (my brother is natural)... ppl will respect you more if you put up and stand up for yourself, then eventually, u will grow that alphaness. i am still not perfect, but i try all the time and i get better all the time. giving up to b alpha b/c ur not natural is like never even trying to play basketball b/c ur not natural like jordan or lebron.