How to be persistent and aggressive without appearing needy and desperate?

[lazikia]

I always see guys being really persistent with girls then ending up with them. How do they manage to be so persistent without coming off as a really needy guy?

 

[lazikia]

Bump, anyone?

 

[Ease]

They don't, you are seeing wrong.

 

[Iceberg]

Persistence works when you know when come on strong and when to lay back. There has to be an attitude about you:

There was this girl at my old job. I'd flirt with her, She'd flirt back. But I still couldn't get her to commit to a meetup outside the office. So sometimes I'd back off - turn off the attention faucet (attention is like currency to these girls). Then she'd come on stronger to get the attention back.

I'd say stuff like, "It's Friday. What are WE doing this weekend? Wine & massages?" Like I know her shy as* was gonna say no. But I wanted to get the idea across that I was trying to get with her. This wasn't some kind of friendship deal.

Or she'd say "My parents are away for the weekend..."
And before the sentence finished I'd say "So you're inviting me over?" Just playful funny stuff.

This works when the girl is shy or playing hard to get, but she's still INTO whatever game you're kicking. If a girl doesn't like you, this stuff won't work. It took like two months of toying around with her before I got her out of the office and in bed, but it taught me that "no" isn't always no. This was years ago...these days I feel like there are too many girls out there for me to sweet talk one for weeks at a time.

It's not that persistence is a bad thing, it's just that these days, I'd rather invest my time and energy in a girl who KNOWs what she wants instead of sitting around playing the "I like him/I don't know if I like him" game.

 

[JdelaSilviera]

Yes persistance works a lot of times... and many relationships start with friendship.... These are just two points that the pua/Dj community seem to ignore..

 

[wasted-nick]

I was super-persistent with one woman. I just divorced her last year.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

Sometimes, the chick just throws in the towel and takes Mr. Persistent.

You can't assume for a second that being persistent and aggressive is a good thing... maybe Persistent/aggressive was the best choice at the time, considering the chump satellites hovering by said chick.

Making assumptions can land you in a lot of trouble, all around.

 

[Sir Psycho Sexy]

Persistence only works if shes playing hard to get.

Playing hard to means she is interested...just gotta play your cards right.

 

[Jay Dee]

Nothing wrong with persistence... but how long will it take?

A better option is to charm many chicks at the same time, but don't chase, flirt hard when you next see them, one will give in quicker than the others.

 

[new_hotness]

It depends on how many other players are involved.

The situation today is that most guys are huddled away in a corner playing video games eating fast food with no social skills.

Any guy who makes a move of any kind therefore is going to stand out in a positive way.

Don't be afraid to take a chance, dude. The only way to fail is by being afraid to fail.

 

[Jitterbug]

I always see guys being really persistent with girls then ending up with them. How do they manage to be so persistent without coming off as a really needy guy?

They take their sweet time gaming that one girl while dating other easier girls on the side.