How often should ya talk?

[Rhino22]

Ok, I met this girl online a few weeks ago and we have been emailing quite a bit. Last night I called her for the first time and we talked for like an hour. Great chemistry and everything. We made plans to go to lunch this saturday. I didn't call or text all day today but she just now texted me about 20 minutes ago and said, "I hope you had a great day =)" So I replied with, "You too " and that was it. I mean, I could call her tonight but honestly I'm kind of working on something. SHould I just leave things the way I did?

 

[kingy]

txt her on friday "hey x, what time did we agree to meet on saturday x or y? y works better for me"

your reply to her txt was laaaammee balls btw, but sounds like she likes you, so just use txt above to reconfirm date nearer the time without appearing needy

 

[Rhino22]

Well, we didn't really set something up that is official yet. We were gonna figure that out later in the week. It was lame balls huh? I couldn't really think of anything else to say at the moment. I didn't really feel like talking.

 

[BongDuy]

Sounds like shes into you. You should def meet her in person soon and strike while the irons hot. Just hope she doesn't photo shop her pictures lol

Edit: Don't stress the whole ****y funny thing too much. your response wasn't the worst thing you could of said.

 

[Rhino22]

Omg what is wrong with me? So am I ****y???

Uh I ended up txting her back just to say, "Last night was fun." It was kind of a joke, but I was kind of serious too lol. And she goes, "Sorry I kept you on the phone so long."

Me:"I liked talking to you. Did you have a nice day?"
Then she goes on to tell me about her christmas party at work and what she got and I said, "NIce, can't go wrong with that. I'm gonna go to bed now. I'll txt you tomorrow and we can figure out what to do Saturday. Nite =)"

And she just replied with, "Later."

Am I reading too much into things? Did I come off as ****y or something? I really am going to bed soon because I got hardly any sleep last night and I can't even think straight right now.

 

[Weezy]

Here's what I would do:

It is Tuesday. Sounds like you dig this chick.. You need to pump your breaks hard or your gonna drive this chick off a cliff quick.

You are focused on the wrong stuff:

No, you don't sound to ****y / funny, not in the least..

Your txt had no substance so it was a waste of a txt, but nothin to trip over.

Knock of the hour long phone calls, chicks love that sh1t so they can find out everything about you and then dump you. Dudes shouldn't be blabbing on the phone for an hour ever / at least until your in a realtionship and even then I dunno how people can talk that long on the phone..

You should have one goal this week and that's to lock down your Saturday lunch date, that's it. Cut out thinking about the little things you txt her or say to her cause it doesn't fn matter.

If she txt's you great, but no need to initiate any contact..

If she emails you same thing. Don't initiate any contact.

Call her Thursday night if she hasn't already asked you to lock down the lunch date and either have a place your gonna meet or a time your gonna pick her up. Once the date is set, get off the phone. Should be 5 minutes max.

If your wigging out this week and can't think of stuff to keep your mind off her, script out all the sh1t your gonna ask her on the lunch date to keep the conversation light and flowing.

On the date, be nice, polite ****y / funny and

WHATEVER YOU DO DON'T MENTION SEEING HER AGAIN ON THE DATE.

follow this advice and you will have raised her interest level by next week and you can work on your next date.

 

[Bobby Rio]

Agreed with above comments.... Here is the thing... remember cat and mouse. Once a girl knows she has you she gets bored...

Play hot and cold with her... sometimes text her right back. Other times wait a day. This peaks her curiosity and gets her attention focused on you.

 

[Rhino22]

Haha ok but do you think I pissed her off by telling her so quickly that I was gonna go to bed?

Also, wouldn't you say I better text her tomorrow with the saturday plans because I did in fact tell her tonight that is what I will do...txt her tomorrow. If I don't then she will think I'm a man who can't keep his word or somethin.

Also, I forgot to mention that this girl told me she really doesn't get out a whole lot lately. Kind of gave up on all her friends and keeps to herself. She also briefly mentioned that she has a hard time trusting guys due to some past experiences...so um should I really play these games? Lol she might just think I'm an as*ho*e or something.

 

[ThatMysteriousGuy]

Ok, I met this girl online a few weeks ago and we have been emailing quite a bit. Last night I called her for the first time and we talked for like an hour. Great chemistry and everything. We made plans to go to lunch this saturday. I didn't call or text all day today but she just now texted me about 20 minutes ago and said, "I hope you had a great day =)" So I replied with, "You too " and that was it. I mean, I could call her tonight but honestly I'm kind of working on something. SHould I just leave things the way I did?

Yes.

Well, we didn't really set something up that is official yet. We were gonna figure that out later in the week. It was lame balls huh? I couldn't really think of anything else to say at the moment. I didn't really feel like talking.

Don't talk when you're unsure and/or don't feel like talking. It's not required for you to do that and it's not a good idea in general.

Also, what's with all this "we" stuff? She wants to be with you right...someone has to be more in charge, be that person. Don't try to come up with ways to "nice guy" plan stuff, say you would like to go out with her on Day X, Time X and either she can or not. If not, come up with another time but NOT ANY TIME, you've got your own life and are busy with things.

Omg what is wrong with me? So am I ****y???

Uh I ended up txting her back just to say, "Last night was fun." It was kind of a joke, but I was kind of serious too lol. And she goes, "Sorry I kept you on the phone so long."

Me:"I liked talking to you. Did you have a nice day?"
Then she goes on to tell me about her christmas party at work and what she got and I said, "NIce, can't go wrong with that. I'm gonna go to bed now. I'll txt you tomorrow and we can figure out what to do Saturday. Nite =)"

And she just replied with, "Later."

Am I reading too much into things? Did I come off as ****y or something? I really am going to bed soon because I got hardly any sleep last night and I can't even think straight right now.

You're reading too much into things.

But, I'd suggest you ask less about what she's doing and how her day is, really, you'll most often get in a girl-girl conversation. Also, "i liked talking to you" is going to set off "oh ****, a needy guy" alarm bells. Stop appreciating her for existing and using her vocal cords. Really, you'll lose her. I promise.

Haha ok but do you think I pissed her off by telling her so quickly that I was gonna go to bed?

Also, wouldn't you say I better text her tomorrow with the saturday plans because I did in fact tell her tonight that is what I will do...txt her tomorrow. If I don't then she will think I'm a man who can't keep his word or somethin.

Also, I forgot to mention that this girl told me she really doesn't get out a whole lot lately. Kind of gave up on all her friends and keeps to herself. She also briefly mentioned that she has a hard time trusting guys due to some past experiences...so um should I really play these games? Lol she might just think I'm an as*ho*e or something.

Stop listening so closely to what she says and attaching extra meanings to it, your mind will pick the ones it wants to see, negative or positive. Shorten your conversations as well. You have better things to do, you're doing your own thing as a man, not turning into a girlfriend for a girl.

In general, and not about what you posted above:
Don't be her girlfriend, avoid talk about previous boyfriends/relationships or guys in general.
Don't be her priest, no confessions, secrets, and don't say your own.
Don't be her therapist: issues she has about men, not your problem, the more you deny you're like that, or say "i understand blah blah" the more she'll be turned off.

DON'T DO THOSE THINGS IF YOU WANT TO GET THE GIRL AND KEEP HER.

 

[Rhino22]

Ok, you're right.

So I either just blow off texting her tomorrow or I go ahead and do it but say, "OK, let's do this at this time, etc"

Which one you guys think I should do?

 

[Rhino22]

And just out of curiousity, how would you have responded to her saying, "Sorry I kept you on the phone so long last night."

 

[ThatMysteriousGuy]

And just out of curiousity, how would you have responded to her saying, "Sorry I kept you on the phone so long last night."

Ignore it completely is best at this point in your personal development. It's an unconscious trap women (and AFC men) do. "Sorry" is primarily a manipulation to get an easy result (lower her own IL for example), gain power, get away with bullshait, or gather information (or a mix of all). "It's OK" is EXACTLY what you should not say. In general, until you build more internal skills, and you will, it's always better to just consider it not worthy of conversation.

It all goes completely wrong when you start forgiving her for something that doesn't need to be forgiven and then as soon as you step in the trap and start saying things like "oh, that's ok, I wasn't busy, had nothing better to do" you're making her IL drop. She isn't an Evil Biatch thinking this all through at all, it's "habit" she's gained through her own life as well as seeing other girls do it.

I need to say, you're really coming at this backwards, and that's ok because we've all done this. There are general principles involved in all of this and having 1,000 responses ready for 1,000 things girls say doesn't help at all when you run into #1,001. Read the DJ bible as well as other sources and try to see the Big Picture more clearly. The Pook stuff for example is good at general concepts.

In general, like john wayne said, "Talk low, talk slow, and don't say much". Her IL won't drop from you not replying, or taking time to consider an answer, but just automatically falling into (for example) reassuring her constantly WILL ALWAYS drop her IL.

 

[Rhino22]

Lol I think you guys are nuts! How many of you are actually getting laid or even have a girl interested in you? Yeah, you're probably just sitting on the internet all day. I told ALL of my friends about this place and me talking to that girl today and they think you all must be in high school.

First of all, me and her had planned to talk on the p hone Monday night, so yes she does know I had nothing else going on. It's because I made time to get to know her on the phone. Busy every other day pretty much.

Secondly, I don't think she is trying to trust me. That is ridiculous. Yeah, I'm sure HOES want to play these games , but not every girl is like that. I know this one isn't.

 

[pipe007]

" Yeah, I'm sure HOES want to play these games , but not every girl is like that. I know this one isn't."

LOL... ohh man,,,, I dont know where to start with that....
your decision to qualify this particular girl as "she is not like the other girls" is groundless. You just met this HOE... you got that right all girls are HOES until they prove it otherwise....

you are a joke if you think this one is any different mate... you are about to get a reality check soon... you just like HER.. that's why she is different.

my advice: No girl is different until they prove it otherwise, and they have passed YOUR TESTS.... which should take aroundd 10 dates to decide if she is worth to keep around....

keep it up, and you already lost...

like she texted you... after you went all AFC on her saying " I really liked talking to you "

she said

"LATER"

thas what you get.