How might you approach...?

[matius]

There was this girl I was infatuated with a while back. Yeah I know, quite a painful memory (being infatuated). Anyway, she was married and it sucked hardcore. She said if she wasn't married she would.

Well, I had stayed in touch in minimal ways. Like for business and what not. Got to know a different side of her. She recently got a divorce.

She makes it sound (in an email) as though she's bored where she is at...but not anything like we should chill.

How might you approach this situation without being too intrusive at first, as I don't know how long it has been since the D went down?

Just some thought might be cool. I want to grab her up no matter what.

 

[RKTek]

Rule of Thumb: It takes half as long as the relationship lasted, to get over it.

"She said if she wasn't married she would" which leads me to believe you already announced your desire to boink a married woman who is not your wife. If I were a woman listening to this, I'd never ever consider you a potential mate because you obviously would consider boinking a married woman who is not your wife.

Forget her, clean up your act and find someone new.

 

[matius]

She would date me...not have sex with me. So what I showed interest in her? Once you get married you don't die. She's actually highly religious, something I'd usually not think about getting involved with.

Maybe she doesn't dig me at all now anyway, I don't know.

 

[thejuice]

RK Tek, i dont think she would have boinked him or showed interest in him...

Matius, she was probably saying this to make you feel better - you did mention seeing her for business. I think that because she knew she be seeing you again for business, she avoided having awkward situiations by not rejecting you

thejuice

 

[Donny Brasco]

Well, since your already friends, invite her out for drinks or get her somewhere where you can test the waters. A good place for this is with a group of your friends (your two buddies and their girls). That way she's out of her element and needs you - to feel some sort of comfort level. You can always sneak away if things go well. Get a few drinks into her and lay on the DJ, whatever it takes.

 

[matius]

the juice - You could be 100% correct.

But why would I be so quick to dismiss the possibility that she would go out with me? I mean, I'm not horrible looking and I'm starting my own business. It wouldn't be a confident move to bury my neck that quickly.

I don't mean to say that she wasn't just trying to placate my feelings. Could be.

 

[Walden]

Matius , sounds like a touch of oneitis.

Here's what you might try.

Put on a nice shirt , and some good cologne.

Walk down main street of yr town this afternoon and count the number of girls that go past that are a interesting as she is.

Then go pick up six of them, if you're still even thinking of her , call her up.

 

[Doppler4000]

How much more time do you really want to waste on this chick? I don't believe for a second that you ultimately want to see her in a totally harmless way. We should make you promise that you won't come back a year from now complaining about how screwed up you are cause you're all hung up over some married chick that ain't ever gonna get un-married... and if she does, it's probably gonna be with someone other than you (because that's usually how that story ends). Seriously dude, I know this sounds harsh but you have no idea how pointless this is. Go find a girl that's actually available right now and worth your time that you can feel good about.

 

[matius]

Thanks-

Yeah I understand what you're saying. But I'm not going to stop meeting other women?

I don't believe for a second that you ultimately want to see her in a totally harmless way.

I don't understand what that means?

What would be wrong with meeting other women, hooking up and getting her too? I won't lie. In the past I've been hung up on a chick, absolute. But I don't plan on being clingy in any respect. I'm stronger mentally with each new day.