how many of you felt this way before

IKO69

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 23, 2005
Messages
1,215
Reaction score
1,115
Age
41
Location
Miami, FL
there used to be a person in my life i was fond of and had a chance at. this particular person was very desirable and even open to the idea but to make a long story short- the failure occurred to having had little experience and not enough confidence to seize the opportunity, in short afc-ism.

what happened afterwards was a massive oneitis that went on for year and years. think about other girls? yeah right, never mind actively pursue them. other opportunities came up that weren't taken advantage of because ultimately it wasn't the "right" person.

over and over the situation was analyzed. what went wrong, what i should've done instead and how i would be sure to shine if i ever got another opportunity. how i always hoped for that damn opportunity.

it was only recently that after thinking about it i just said **** this. i'm a good guy with tremendous potential and i don't say this to make myself feel better, i really mean this and i know this deep down. the oneitis has been like a huge anchor in my life for the past few years. she was not without fault, but it's true that i view myself as being partly responsible as i was anything but a casanova-i tried as hard as i could to the best of my ability. being much older and wiser i can see where i had made some mistakes and would not commit them today.

a part of me felt wronged, like how could you reject me, and though i believe i had a right to feel this way...i see where it's just been a giant waste of time to have put my life on hold. put my life on hold because of someone who honestly didn't deserve the torture i've put myself through. i guess it's normal for us to feel this way whenever we fall short. we wish we could make them change their minds, after all they are out of their minds for rejecting us how could they do that?? instead of letting it be and moving on, we hang on to the hope that one day maybe we can change things.

i have a box full of **** related to her i've kept all these years. has letters we exchanged, pictures, things i wrote yadda yadda. for the longest time it was a sort of prized possession of mine. i cared for her so much i kept these things (oddly enough it was very painful at the same time to keep).

i wonder how many of your have ever experienced something like this? i imagine it's something at least some can resonate with.

i decided that i'm going to take the box of **** and just get rid of it.

thanks for reading, henry
 

IKO69

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 23, 2005
Messages
1,215
Reaction score
1,115
Age
41
Location
Miami, FL
i got rid of everything. it actually felt like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. i can now move forward, no longer hand cuffed by the past. i think my success with women now will sky rocket.
 

MisterD

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 29, 2011
Messages
403
Reaction score
35
It's quite a feeling when you break out of your oneitis. When you look back and see how...ordinary she is/was. Even better when you get with a higher quality girl than the one you were obsessing over.
 

ChalengeGuyFan

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 5, 2008
Messages
523
Reaction score
19
I can relate, but only to the degree where I kept thinking about her for many years after. No way of keeping things relating to her or torturing myself.
Here's the story:

I was 16 and in a camp at the seaside with my sister, the team of girl dancers that she was part of, some volleyball-er girls, the dancing coach and the volleyball coach (they were husband and wife, the coaches). Yep, I was the only boy in a group of many HOT girls. Massive flirting ensued, as you can imagine. The coaches' daughter, a 23 y.o. HOTNESS, completed the group. The following happened with this girl:

- we were at an outdoor show and it pretty cold outside. She asked me to hold her in my arms the whole time. I was worried about seeming to eager...
- we were alone in the room and she put her hand on my leg and stared into my eyes. I froze, not knowing what to do.
- at the beach, she always asked for my help with the sunscreen.
- coming from the beach, many times she said her tits felt cold after swimming and jokingly asked me to come to her room to help her feel warm, again.
- she entered the bathroom while I was having a bath to ask me if I wanted to tag along in a trip to town. This has a funny side, because at that exact time I released a huge fart and was more worried about covering it up than about anything sexual. Haha!
- one night, the lights went off and she said "OMG! It's so dark! Let's kiss with CFG!" I grabbed her and gave her a peck :)
- one day, as we were sitting on opposite beds, she was worried that I could see her panties underneath her sexy dress and was covering them up. As soon as the other girls left the room her worries disappeared and let me have a good view. Unfortunately, by that time I had removed my glasses and couldn't see a damn thing! I was too ashamed to act.
- when walking, she always held my hand.

After the camp ended I didn't contact her, although she was living 10 minutes away from me!

So yep, due to my lack of confidence, my repressed sexual nature and the total lack of experience I have missed what could have been the opportunity of my life. Many a times I have wondered how my life would have been like if I had seized that opportunity. Eehhh...


I think it was 4 summers when I succeeded in tagging along my sister in similar camps and each fvcking time I have had many opportunities, but had failed miserably to profit.


Outside of those, there were plenty more HUGE opportunities that I had missed and kept thinking about for a long time. Hell, I could have been a natural, had I have taken advantage of them!
 

Aaron B

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 8, 2005
Messages
910
Reaction score
29
I fell in love with a classmate in high school and we never got together, although we were very close at times.

I literally thought of her multiple times a day for years. Eventually a few times per week, then once a week, now maybe a couple of times a year.

It's amazing to remember how large those feelings were at the time and how important they seemed.

Now that so much time has passed, as I look back on it, I feel nothing.
 
Top