How many of you are married ?! If so are you sleeping with other women.

[AmsterdamAssassin]

In my case, if my wife comes home from work and wants to argue/pick a fight, she is testing me. This is often called a **** test.

If you read my posts, you will notice that I call it a 'congruency test'. Sh!t test is too negative and will influence how you approach being tested. And the fact is, you will get tested less and less the more congruent you are, the more authentic you are, and the more integrity you show. If a woman feels safe with you, she won't feel the need to test you that often. Once in a while, when she feels you pay her less attention and give her less validation, she will want to be noticed and she'll start testing you again to see if she can annoy you. That's why you should never show annoyance, but calmly address her like a bratty teenager.

Women have an evolutionary need to test their men. It evolved over 200k years. Tests used to be in the form of defending against threats and hunting, things of that nature.

The priority for women in relationships is safety. So they look for someone who will protect and support them while also be capable of providing resources and having a high status within the tribe. A mature man who has emotional self control and will not act impulsively.

Congruency testing starts when a woman doubts whether you're the man you claim to be. You act mature, but are you really in control of your emotions?
Will you allow her to manipulate you emotionally and show incongruence by becoming emotional? Can she pull you into her drama and argue with her? Will your ego take over when she challenges you?
Or will you calmly assert your boundaries while showing her compassion? Can you soothe her and make her feel secure?

Those needs are no longer necessary, but women still need to test. If you take the bait, if you argue, you fail the test.

The need for women to test for congruency is more necessary than ever. With the growing individualism the fabric of tribal society has lost its threads, making it difficult to observe someone within society. Interaction has become more and more superficial, so women have to put a potential suitor to the test to see if they are mature enough for a relationship. To test if they have their life together so the woman doesn't become their mommy. To test if they are supportive enough to dependably lean on. Et cetera.