How long to wait to txt after first date ?

[Rake101]

Had first date last night im 26 she is 23
It went well we had a bite and got a drink
We both had a good time tho
I didn't go fir the kiss tho i could have but didnt she seems decent not a slut

Anyways is it okay to msg her the next day i we had the date friday i was going to wait till monday but didnt want her thinking im not intrested and for it to backfire should i wait till sunday to msg her atleast .

 

[MrEkko]

Try to go for the kiss on the first date. She doesn’t need to be a slut for that, we’re not talking about fingering her under the bar table it’s just a kiss. Text her Sunday.

 

[Rake101]

Try to go for the kiss on the first date. She doesn’t need to be a slut for that, we’re not talking about fingering her under the bar table it’s just a kiss. Text her Sunday.

Yeah thats right .. i ended up txting her today didn't wanna risk been too distant its burned me a few times. But sunday would have been good too
Should i try organising to meet up next week with her straight away or have abit of back and fourth first ?

 

[MrEkko]

Yeah thats right .. i ended up txting her today didn't wanna risk been too distant its burned me a few times. But sunday would have been good too
Should i try organising to meet up next week with her straight away or have abit of back and fourth first ?

Straight away

 

[KindredSpiritzz]

ideally if you had a date on friday night you dont send a text saturday giving her the opportunity to send one first instead to show interest on her part. Otherwise id wait til sunday if im responding first. Id follow up by asking for a date that next week sometime.
The fact that you texted first tells her you're more desperate and gives he the upper hand to a degree. Shes leading, you're chasing and you need to change that back in your favor. Always go for the kiss too. I usually cop a feel..... boob or ass just to see what response i get so i can judge her real interest.

 

[SW15]

5-9 days if you met her off of a swipe app or a cold approach. @EyeBRollin is the master of this technique. You can text her back if she breaks the silence before 5 days.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

I now subscribe to the model of not texting women after the first date. If she liked you, she'll text you. If you go through the all that effort of taking her out and she can't even be bothered to send a simple "thank you, I had a nice time" text, why the hell would you bother pursuing her further?

Try to go for the kiss on the first date. She doesn’t need to be a slut for that, we’re not talking about fingering her under the bar table it’s just a kiss. Text her Sunday.

This is so forced and cliche, literally every simp does this and all women pretty much expect it.

 

[Glassguy]

Always go for the kiss on the first date. Also while kissing her, put your hands around her lower back. If she responds well, move your hand down to her ass.

If the chick had a great time and wants to see you again, she will text you the next day. If she doesn't, big red flag, but you can text her on day 2.

I don't like "rules" for time lines but you certainly don't want to over pursue. You texted her already the next day. I'll bet If she hinted about seeing you tonight you'd bite on it. At that point you are losing value because you'll fail her availability test and chances are she'll end up "busy" this evening. You went out with her on Friday night so if you're a high value guy with a strong SMV, you'll have plans with someone else or doing something else tonight. That's why I say you should've waited till Sunday to reach out if she hasn't first.

Sunday should be the day to reach back out for Thursday or Friday dates, but again, if she doesn't initiate contact after the first date on the following day, it's a bad sign. You didn't give her a chance to chase you.
I would recommend letting her do the initiating for the next couple weeks even if you see her again this week.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

If your asking this, then the date could of probably gone better, because optimally you want to be setting the next date before the first one has ended or at the very least planting the seed and establish a timeline for when you'll follow through, so like "I'll Face Time you on Tuesday and we'll talk about moving forward".

If you say "Hey I'll text you in a couple days" and then text her 10 minutes after you left the date, it's sending mixed signals, this is something you don't want to do unless your willing to blow **** up, which you should be anyways but mixed signals can turn attraction into confusion

 

[Snag87]

5-9 days if you met her off of a swipe app or a cold approach. @EyeBRollin is the master of this technique. You can text her back if she breaks the silence before 5 days.

What's the rationale behind this?

 

[SW15]

@EyeBRollin wrote it better than I could here.

Text game

Here’s my thing - so I just banged the HB 7.5 I spoke about in the other thread (to which I thank you for your advice!). Since we banged, she has been texting almost nonstop with very high interest. Due to our schedules we couldn’t see each other for 9 days (down to 7 now). If I essentially...

www.sosuave.net

This is based off of an idea I read about in the early 2000s from Doc Love. Doc Love likely proposed as far back as the 1990s.

Doc Love

Dating tips for guys

www.doclove.com

 

[Rake101]

I now subscribe to the model of not texting women after the first date. If she liked you, she'll text you. If you go through the all that effort of taking her out and she can't even be bothered to send a simple "thank you, I had a nice time" text, why the hell would you bother pursuing her further?


This is so forced and cliche, literally every simp does this and all women pretty much expect it.

So you think dont go for a kiss first date ?

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

So you think dont go for a kiss first date ?

I'm merely saying not to go go for a kiss at the very end of a date, especially if there was no flirting or physicality beforehand. Try to physically touch them throughout the date, and maybe you'll kiss or make out with them at some point, maybe not.

 

[BadBoy89]

So you think dont go for a kiss first date ?

By the time you get the answers and process them, she has moved on, especially if she is hot.

No kiss from a (hot) 23 year old is tough. But, in my opinion, you have to move fast. I would text her again and set up something quick. If she says no, move on.

When I was your age, I used to think "give them time, pretend to be busy, take it slow, be nice." It's what society trains you to think. Society wants very average nice men who repress their sexuality, don't challenge authority, recite school facts, don't say too much, don't go out with hot women, pay their taxes, and treat hot girls with much much respect.

But if you want hot young girls, you shouldn't act this way. It turns them off. If you want hot young girls, your tongue has to be down her throat fast. A hot 23-year-old girl will give it up MUCH faster than an average-looking 36-year-old.

Phone her now and set up a date for Wednesday.

 

[Aeterna]

If the girl had a great time like you said, she should be texting you first after the first date.

 

[Smok1nAce]

OP make your intentions clear from the beginning. If you liked the first date, you should have set up the next one right before leaving the first one.

It takes guts but a least then the ball is in your court and you can see clearly what she wants and what her intentions are with you. Now the ball is in her court and you have to see if she still wants to play. We all know what happens when women are given the chance to lead. Is it over no, but now the ball is in her court so you have to wait for her to serve you the ball (If she even does).

Really if you didn't text her the night of the first date, texting her back first now makes you look weak. (and we all know what women do to men who come doing weak things). You best option is hopefully wait till she texts you again and set up a date.

Second best option would be call her now, spend 10 mins on the phone and set up a date. Sucks, but you screwed up the first time, gotta do it the hard way now, just learn from you mistakes. You might have to chalk this one up.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Had first date last night im 26 she is 23
It went well we had a bite and got a drink
We both had a good time tho
I didn't go fir the kiss tho i could have but didnt she seems decent not a slut

Anyways is it okay to msg her the next day i we had the date friday i was going to wait till monday but didnt want her thinking im not intrested and for it to backfire should i wait till sunday to msg her atleast .

There are no rules if you have mad inner game, experience and options.

Assuming you don't, restraint and spinning new plates and goals is useful to cultivate the above.

 

[MrEkko]

I would suggest against trying to set up the second date during the first one. It seems needy and uncool just sitting there and making real plans during the date for a following date.
Hinting stuff like “we should go there”, “we should do this” etc. is different if you keep it vague but no more than that.

 

[2Rocky]

If it is a get-to-know-you coffee date and 30 minutes, I'm not going to try to kiss her. I will set up the evening date for later that week right then. She can see then I'm not a wierdo, and I'll propose picking her up or she can meet me at my place. Most likely I'll do a non Restaurant date, and I might cook with her. I'm going to do something where we are more or less isolated and I'm not competing for her attention. Then we will see where the night takes us.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

Had first date last night im 26 she is 23
It went well we had a bite and got a drink
We both had a good time tho
I didn't go fir the kiss tho i could have but didnt she seems decent not a slut

Anyways is it okay to msg her the next day i we had the date friday i was going to wait till monday but didnt want her thinking im not intrested and for it to backfire should i wait till sunday to msg her atleast .

First things first, a decent woman is also a human. Humans crave touch and contact (if that is genuinely desired), that is our nature, unless you are emotionally/psychologically damaged. Going for the kiss on the 1st date does not make her a s**t.

Second, there are no rules about texting after the first date. Some "PUA" or "Date Advisors" would say 1 day but that is all BS. It is subjective and circumstantial. It is your job to read her actions and act accordingly. In my book, if the date went well she will reach out. Have her chase you a bit too. Assuming you led and set up on the first date, let her reciprocate.

Most women would even ask to text them when you get home so it is all up to you. There is no right or wrong answer. The closest to the wrong answer would be for you to always initiate the interaction or plan.

I always advise men that are dating to stop overthinking every situation and interaction. That simply just diminishes your experience. Be present, learn to read her actions, and just enjoy yourself, man.

No one has time to impress or put up an act for someone. Especially if that someone is not committed to getting to know you and making you part of their life.

Hope this helps.


Modern Man Advise