How long to wait after she gets out of a relationship?

duke104

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This girl I know who is a friend of a friend just broke up with her boyfriend of a few months just last week. I met her through said friend and at the time she was in a relationship so at most we would briefly talk once a month or so, but haven't talked to her in about 6 months besides occasional facebook posts or whatever. She's a very attractive girl so I'd definitely be down to hook up or maybe even date her at some point. Is there a certain time frame on how long to wait after a girl gets out of a relationship before asking her out, start talking to her, etc? Since she's a pretty attractive girl I'm sure there's about 10 other guys chasing after her as we speak
 

DonJuanabe

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Why did she break up with him? Was it her breaking up with him or more him giving her the boot?
 

duke104

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No idea. I have no idea who the guy she dated was and like I said, I haven't talked to the girl in months
 

bigneil

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The other man is not a factor.

But she might still have feelings for him and ultimately date you while longing for him. Chances are, you won't be her #1 guy for months at a minimum, and if you are, it's only during the honeymoon phase when she's only seen your good qualities.
 

DonJuanabe

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The other guy is a factor if he broke up with her because she might still be emotionally attached to him. If she broke up with him she likely is over him. That matters. If you intend to pursue her I'd avoid any relationship/date stuff and just hang out and do something fun -- you'll get a feel pretty quickly whether she is hung up on the guy or has moved on and is interested in meeting someone new. Do NOT get enmeshed in a discussion about the prior boyfriend -- if that comes up and she sucks you in to some emotional crap you need to bail.
 

bigneil

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DonJuanabe said:
The other guy is a factor if he broke up with her because she might still be emotionally attached to him.
Yes, this happens often, when you are the #2 guy so she has high interest, but she is still using you to make her #1 guy jealous. That's when their feelings just seem to change overnight and you know it wasn't something you did.

The warning signs are, she says she still loves him, and says she doesn't think he's attracted to her anymore.
 

Iceberg

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Espi said:
In my opinion, don't wait. Don't analyze. Don't try to placate her or be sensitive to whatever excuse she uses.

Damn the torpedoes; let the chips fall where they may. Just go after it.

You have nothing to lose by going after it. There are tons of other girls out there; if one of them "isn't ready," then you simply move on to the next girl you like.

Exactly. There are no rules.

If she's attracted to you, she would go out with you the day after the breakup and come home to brag to her friends about it.

And if she's not attracted to you, then the "I just got out of a relationship" excuse could go on for years.
 

5string

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Think about it. Relationships sour in time. We have all been there on both sides of the fence. She had probably been thinking about a breakup long before it actually happened.

Therefore, the light is now green. Proceed.
 

Mike32ct

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She better have an unlimited texting plan. When any decent looking girl gets out of a relationship, she usually has plenty of horny sausage contacting her immediately trying for a rebound lay.

So make a move sooner rather than later.
 

WorkingDJ

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Just go for it and don't really care what she says. The girl I'm talking to was newly out of a relationship when I started talking to her hard, and the first couple times I was with her she would say she's not ready for a relationship.

But I just stayed with it, and if not for the end of the college year, We'd be in a relationship.

Just go for broke!
 

coochieman

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"Wait" ? That's very laughable.

Do not.

Fucck it, take the gaddamn shot and know where you stand.

Commence game on her as we speak regardless of if she has one, two.... twenty or no boyfriend. All of that is none of your business yet, and might never be.

Waiting on her equals wasting precious time that can be spent wisely on other females (or even more reasonable endeavors of life) and it still DOESN'T guarantee you any pussie success. Waiting would only make you analyze the unnecessary even further.

If she (her emotions, logic or whatever) perceives you worthy, she'd hop aboard.

Choice is yours.

GO DJ.
 
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