How long should you talk on msn before meeting in person?

[crackers444]

I am wondering how long you should talk to a person online, before meeting them in person. I have met people from online and I felt didn't completely know them that well. It seems to me people don't wanna tell you more about them in person, until you find out later things that make you change their view of them. I know nobody is perfect, but it seems that there are very few "decent" people to be found online. What are views on this issue?

 

[xander]

i say 2 or 3 weeks depending on how often you talk to the person and if you feel you actually have a connection with the person. cause if u wait too long and start to like the girl a lot and when you finally ask her and for whatever reason she says no then its gonna hurt a lot more than if you met her before you really had strong feelings for her.

 

[Obsidian]

twice. Be entertaining during the first convo for about 10-15 minutes and then end it early -- "i gotta go do some stuff, I'll ttyl tho." During the second convo (a few days later), ask for her # or if she wants to go get coffee (thereby bypassing the phone number)

i don't have a great deal of experience with this, but it worked the one time that i tried it.

 

[wheelin&dealin]

I am wondering how long you should talk to a person online, before meeting them in person. I have met people from online and I felt didn't completely know them that well. It seems to me people don't wanna tell you more about them in person, until you find out later things that make you change their view of them. I know nobody is perfect, but it seems that there are very few "decent" people to be found online. What are views on this issue?

Pretty sad that you're meeting people online... Chances are this broad is fat and disgusting in person.

 

[xander]

Pretty sad that you're meeting people online... Chances are this broad is fat and disgusting in person.

thats bull.... i have met girls from online and they were not fat and disgusting whatsoever..well except for that one girl lol

 

[Jestor]

I am wondering how long you should talk to a person online, before meeting them in person. I have met people from online and I felt didn't completely know them that well. It seems to me people don't wanna tell you more about them in person, until you find out later things that make you change their view of them. I know nobody is perfect, but it seems that there are very few "decent" people to be found online. What are views on this issue?

You can talk for five minutes and the girl will suggest a get together. You don't even need to talk on the phone first.

Main ingredients for this:

- Be chilled out (don't be too eager in responding)
- Act normal (talk about everyday stuff and ask her questions about herself)

In fact, the more normal you can act the better. Less is more.

 

[Lost1]

I've met girls online too, just becareful.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

i say 2 or 3 weeks depending on how often you talk to the person and if you feel you actually have a connection with the person. ....

WHAT!!!

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

twice. ...

:yes: That's better... Make sure you qualify them first.

 

[reveazure]

I've met around 40 girls from the internet, and I'm trying to move towards other sources. Here's the thing that I realized: people get interested in each other through chemistry, and whatever chemistry exists in an IM conversation between strangers is usually imagined, because neither person has any idea of what the other is actually like. So there's the answer: talk as little as possible before meeting, because the more you talk, the more you will both build up this false image of the other person that will make things weird when you do meet.

 

[COD]

OKAY THE PURPOSE FOR AN IM is to extract a phone number first and far most, then to build rapport.

Start with fluff stuff (HI, how are you, where you from, how u doing, do you own a vibrator, is your web cam broken, etc)

Next-transition into a suggestion of taking this TWO DIMENSIONAL flirting into a meeting.

Then-get her digits and call her.

TIME FRAME-no more than 5 minutes..........2 weeks.........ya that works, sheesh!!!

so lets recap--EMAIL, IM CONVERSATION FOR real time conversation.....get her number, call, then meet.

IM are best utilized for AFTER you two met......same goes for text flirting via cell phone.

 

[Horse Whisperer]

I've met around 40 girls from the internet, and I'm trying to move towards other sources. Here's the thing that I realized: people get interested in each other through chemistry, and whatever chemistry exists in an IM conversation between strangers is usually imagined, because neither person has any idea of what the other is actually like. So there's the answer: talk as little as possible before meeting, because the more you talk, the more you will both build up this false image of the other person that will make things weird when you do meet.

Yes - get away from the virtual arena asap!
Again, I have to say, my experience of girls I know who go for all this online stuff are on there to boost their self esteem "oo- look how popular I am, how many friends I have, how many MEN are saying how hot I am" etc etc.
It is sad and needy, so don't pander to it and get her into the REAL world asap.

Another issue to ponder perhaps is that social networking or dating sites are built around giving your personal information away (e.g. your likes dislikes, height requirements , do you want kids etc etc) which I believe is cardinal sin for any wannabe DJ?
I am sure any girl worth her salt would be more 'intrigued' by a stranger she meets on a train etc than someone who reveals their shoe size in some virtual arena.:crazy:

 

[Obsidian]

girls I know who go for all this online stuff are on there to boost their self esteem "oo- look how popular I am, how many friends I have, how many MEN are saying how hot I am" etc etc.

Well said.

pshh, i got a girl who clicked YES to me on hotornot while I was away on vacation with limited internet access. When I finally clicked YES back to her in response (didn't send a msg tho), I checked back this morning and she had deleted the double match. Females online are so silly.

it might have been that she was out of state and clicked yes to me on accident the first time (she was supposedly from ohio). I had clicked yes because i thought maybe she was in town for college or something...