How long did it take you to recover from a bad relationship?

[TonyBaloney]

Just curious how long it took you guys, and how you went about it? Do you still hold negative thoughts about it - how long did it last/how long ago.

I'm struggling still after nearly 5 months out of a on/off 3.5 year relationship.

Thanks in advance,

Tony

 

[Jariel]

It took me around a year to get back to being my best. I got over her pretty quickly, but I'd got complacent while I was with her and found it very difficult getting back in the field and meeting new women.

I also found that it took a while to "find myself" again. But the best things I ever did was to make a huge effort to improve myself and to keep pushing myself out of my comfort zone. I went on quite a few dates and asked women for their numbers. I got rejected, even had a couple of panic attacks, but gradually I started developing a resistance to it and became a natural.

Just keep moving forward mate and don't look back.

 

[scien-ITA]

5 months for a 3.5 yr relationship.

Best thing to do is work on yourself, I know this probably seems like the advice you will find everywhere else BUT it is because it really works.

1-. work on yourself (gym, hobbies, intellectual, etc)
2-. get social (friends, family and women)
3-. everything else falls in place

I wouldn't even try to get with women until you are actually doing well. In my case I started to develop oneintis for a girl (replace one with another) but stopped myself when I saw my inner AFC creeping.

Best of luck!

 

[TonyBaloney]

Thanks for all the words of wisdom so far gents - if any DJ's are around London, England - gimme a shout!!! (its criminal being in on a saturday night!!!)

 

[Packers2010]

7 years of loving followed by a few months of ****ing. then.. about 8 months to a year to get over her.

now i see her as a real sticking point not to end up like that again.

 

[bigneil]

Just curious how long it took you guys, and how you went about it? Do you still hold negative thoughts about it - how long did it last/how long ago. I'm struggling still after nearly 5 months out of a on/off 3.5 year relationship. Thanks in advance, Tony

You're almost there.

(November 2010 - April 2011) Relationship with Girl A who had BPD (i.e. heartbreak, oneitis).
(May 2011 - June 2011) Pure heartbreak and depression (didn't take any medication though and even quit smoking weed, and got in shape).
(July 2011 - October 2011) Good relationship (Girl B), but missed Girl A.
(October 2011 - January 2012) - Great relationship (Girl C), but still missed Girl A.
(January 2012 - February 2012) - After 2 months with Girl C and 9 months after my broken heart, Girl C officially replaced Girl A in my mind. It happened gradually and one day I just realized my thoughts were with the new one (and now I would NEVER go back!)

"Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers."
-Garth Brooks