OnlyOnce,
You stay no contact. If by chance due to work you bump into her, you say something like,"hello, have a nice day". You give her NOTHING. As far as calling, well I did take a call from my ex bpd at like 4 months and just told her to never contact me. I didn't read out the laundry list. You are wasting oxygen doing that. It would be like trying to explain to a 3 year old what you were feeling. USELESS, she does'nt have the capacity to understand.
Now as other posters have said, she will repeatedly attempt contact. What I noticed with the ex BPD in my life was that she put on the full court to get back in when I dumped her, and every so often when her newest relationship falls apart I get a text, or phonecall. It's as if she cannot stand being alone and tries the old list of #'s from her past to prop herself up. It's almost like clockwork. Every couple months I get a call, or e-mail. I take it in stride knowing that she's probably just sabotauged another relationship, or been dumped by a guy that's figured her game.
Stay no contact, eventually it will stop. If it doesn't and she resorts to drive-bys, knocking at your door, etc don't be afraid to bring in the law. Do not allow her to talk to you, she'll throw guilt, shame, sex, or anything she knows will get under your skin to get back in. Heck she may even say that she's,"in therapy". That if you just give her,"one more chance" she'll prove that she's right for you. That's what mine tried. BPD's are known to be that persistant. THEY hate to be abandoned, yet the sickness is they always set about that self destruction to their relationships. They are REPEATING a pattern that they learned in childhood. Don't be part of it. I had to get legal/ police protection for myself. So take it from me and the posters that have had the unfortune of dealing with women like this.
You're on the right path. NO CONTACT.
Afterwards don't feel guilty. One thing I noticed in your post is that she's already with another guy. Now, while you've thrown her out of your life realize that she's the same broken person with him. That same broken one she was with you. In other words she's not somehow, "miraculously cured". More than likely she's causing turmoil and pain to a new sucker that's willing to put up with her crap. So don't EVER feel that you have lost something, always remember the turmoil that she brought to your life and realize she is almost certainly still doing the same script only with a new cast. She doesn't change, and WON'T because she doesn't have to. If anyone holds her accountable, she will just begin to f with their heads. Be glad you aren't caught in her drama.
KC
