How I Went From the Chaser to the Chased Through Text

[Hate the game..]

Learning from Experience
Example of how to dig yourself out of a hole


Overview:
College aged girl, met her at a party had a solid convo did some flirting, exchanged digits before a concert on campus. She slept over that night no sex.

We had discussed a date vaguely, as usual it’s an effort with younger girls.
This is an example of what not to do when setting up a date

Me: Hey we still on for this weekend?

Her: As far as I know you haven’t made any plans yet

Me: How does Saturday afternoon work for you?

Her: Actually I might have to take a defensive driving class I’ll let you know tomorrow

Me: Sounds good

Me: Totally spaced, I’ve got this darty I promised my friend I’d go to Saturday, Sunday work?

Her: hahaha dartying… Sunday works well

Me: sounds good meet at … at 2 on Sunday

Her: what are we doing

Me: thinking a bike ride

Her: Sounds fun

2 days later..

I become the Chaser

Her: I have to raincheck for Sunday I picked up a shift for my coworker
But I am in .. at the moment. Raincheck?

Me: so sad.. Sunday raincheck?
(never sound disappointed it’s a sign of weakness)

Her: Ya but I’m in (my city) now hahahaha

Me: K where are you we’ll meet up
(should have told her to come to me)

Her: Guess where I am?

Me: Where?

Her: your frat house

Me: no way

Her: yeah

Me: I’ll meet you in a bit.. still there?

Her: no

Me: Where are you now?
(never chase just say “too bad” or “alright”)

Her: … (some bar)

Me: heh may I join?

Her: if you would like

Me: I would like where is it?
(chasing chasing chasing)

Her: its in …

Me: Come to … and hang out
(Needy)

Her: Going to a date function can’t
(PUNISHMENT)

Me: K have fun
(Never say have fun in this situation you don’t give a ****)

5 days later

Me: Hey what’s up?

Her: Entertaining a bunch of middle aged people

Me: One of my talents.. I want to take you up on that raincheck sometime soon

Her: Plausible

Me: I’d take that as a yes, next weekend maybe? (be definitive)

Her: No I have plans

Me: How about Friday?
(Don’t ask for a followup again ever)

Her: After I’m off work sure.

Me: Sounds good when you off?

NO RESPONSE

3 days later.. 1 day before the date

Me: Still up for a date tomorrow

Her: Yes (she was drunk when saying this)

Me: Lemme know what time your off work tomorrow..

Of course she never sends me a text that day

Redemption time, watch closely kids. This is how you recover..

Tip #2: after a girl pulls **** like this, cut off contact and wait for her to come to you, if she doesn’t she’s not worth your time

I become the Chased

1 Week Passes

Her: Yoooo

I don’t respond
1 Day later..

Me: Hello there (be brisk, no conversation if she wants it she’ll come eventually)


The Turning Point- Dan Grows a Pair

3 weeks later.. She's backkk

Her: Are you going to bar hopping in … tonight for halloween?

Me: I don’t think so I’ll be partying on campus
(no more following this chica around)

Her: Lammeeee

3 days later..
Phone call from her, we meet up at a bar, she is dancing with some guy I play it cool and talk to people. We see each other, I act cold, dance a bit with other girls, treat her like I don’t give a fvck.
Last call comes she drags me out by my hand, I forcefully release my hand from hers on the way out

She says “where are you going? come with us!” (motioning to her 2 friends)
I say “thanks but no thanks I’m going home, come if you want”
She follows like a puppy dog
I fvck her brains out.

Next Day

Her: Hurrrrricane (there was a hurricane going through at this time)
Dan I have a question to ask please call me tomorrow

I never call, because all I wanted from her was a good lay and that’s what I got. If I did want her she would now be chaser and I the alpha. Case closed.

 

[Fly By Night]

3 weeks is a long time, but you got what u wanted... And why not keep her for future lays?

 

[Scars]

Nice recovery. You changed the frame over to your favor instead of hers. It's amazing what a little NC and aloofness can do.

-Scars

 

[Fatal Jay]

yep

their use to being chased, what I do is write down there number on a piece of paper then delete the number,if their worth the smash, and usually within a week or two later of no nc they come back

 

[Daily Insanity]

Alright, good work on REALIZING your mistakes, however, if all you wanted from this girl is sex, that's a good start but long time investment. Now don't become an man wh0re, because the second you stop talking to her for a long time, the more time she has to tell her friends that you're just like ALL GUYS. (just want sex and ditch). When women spread rumors, it freaking goes around like a bad case of the cold virus. To be a Don Juan, surround yourself with plates, and this is a plate to spin. Keep her IL in you up, but stay cool.

Good luck

 

[Sofomore]

Sounds to me like you had to jump through a bunch of hoops to get some low quality snatch. Those texts were pretty needy dude. If a girl sleeps over it shouldnt take another month to get in her pants.

Either way, good work on finally hitting it. Just next time don't be so available and stop pu$$yfooting around with "may I come join you?". Do guys that get laid say that? I don't think so.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

TEXTING KILLS RELATIONSHIPS.

Furthermore, you didn't end up gaming her through text - you ended up gaming her by interacting with her in person. You showed neediness through the majority of your text, and even when you didn't respond to her, it probably gave her some kind of impression about you holding a grudge.

Don't get it twisted, I'm definitely happy you ended up banging her brains out. I'm just pointing out that it wasn't as a result of anything you did through text. People on here will say "oh, but I've gotten such and such girl by using text, so you're wrong, Harry!" This isn't one of those cases - getting her via text would have meant setting up a date with her via messaging and then having it actually go through.

Bottom line: in person is always the way to go when it comes to gaming a women. At the very least, calling her would have been faster and more effective than the whole texting thing would have been.

 

[The_Crack]

TEXTING KILLS RELATIONSHIPS.

Furthermore, you didn't end up gaming her through text - you ended up gaming her by interacting with her in person. You showed neediness through the majority of your text, and even when you didn't respond to her, it probably gave her some kind of impression about you holding a grudge.

Don't get it twisted, I'm definitely happy you ended up banging her brains out. I'm just pointing out that it wasn't as a result of anything you did through text. People on here will say "oh, but I've gotten such and such girl by using text, so you're wrong, Harry!" This isn't one of those cases - getting her via text would have meant setting up a date with her via messaging and then having it actually go through.

Bottom line: in person is always the way to go when it comes to gaming a women. At the very least, calling her would have been faster and more effective than the whole texting thing would have been.

sh1t mentality man, no girls these days who are under the age of 30 will EVER phone call unless you are already well established with her. I've had couagars who i've ****ed who refused to pick up the phone when i call..
Todays generation is all about the text, makes conversation alot easier and is alot lesser investment on her part. Play the game.. don't be stuck in the old ways. I admit, texting used to be a weak part of my game before, but its really coming along now, and i've built a WHOLE lot of rapport and comfort through text with alot of girls, and when i met up with them.. the foundation was already set. Easy to get lays.
OP did awesome when he flipped the script.. she was used to you being a pansy and asking to meet up over and over and was suprised when you were brisk and short. That with you playing It cool on the day sealed it. Great work man.

 

[Packers2010]

so the whole point of this is going No contact and waiting for her to contact you..

i met a girl out last week witch was good i kept her laughing n stuff. i got her number and facebook. so i been trying to text her and she aint responding.

I did message her out the day after she was busy, obvs. i expected her to flake since i am new. though i don't think i did enough to get her to message back.

 

[GearsGod]

so the whole point of this is going No contact and waiting for her to contact you..

i met a girl out last week witch was good i kept her laughing n stuff. i got her number and facebook. so i been trying to text her and she aint responding.

I did message her out the day after she was busy, obvs. i expected her to flake since i am new. though i don't think i did enough to get her to message back.

She obviously has to be interested in you man.Try talking to her more and get to know her more (Without showing that you're needy). In time you should meet with her (have a drink with her etc..) have FUN with her. If she didn't text back, don't keep texting/Facebook messaging her and show that you're a needy dude (Chicks find the neediness unattractive, it's a b!tch trait) you should have more options than just her. If she's ignoring you she's not interested. Move on.

-GearsGod

 

[Starkwell]

That is a lot of texting, pretty boring texts too, waited a little long, but you got the job done, and I give you credit for it.

TEXTING KILLS RELATIONSHIPS.

Furthermore, you didn't end up gaming her through text - you ended up gaming her by interacting with her in person. You showed neediness through the majority of your text, and even when you didn't respond to her, it probably gave her some kind of impression about you holding a grudge.

Don't get it twisted, I'm definitely happy you ended up banging her brains out. I'm just pointing out that it wasn't as a result of anything you did through text. People on here will say "oh, but I've gotten such and such girl by using text, so you're wrong, Harry!" This isn't one of those cases - getting her via text would have meant setting up a date with her via messaging and then having it actually go through.

Bottom line: in person is always the way to go when it comes to gaming a women. At the very least, calling her would have been faster and more effective than the whole texting thing would have been.

It's funny that guys like this like to bash texting and steer guys away from it, when almoist every chicks texts on a regular basis. Texting can be used to your advantage if you use it correctly. Not long boring convos as we saw here, but great texts work like a charm. Most chicks are busy throughout the day and don't have time to take a call when they are at work or school. I had a chick leave a class at night to hang out because of not calling, but texting. Guys have all these tools to their advantage to advance their game, texting IM's, internet, and some don't want to use it or say it weakens your game. That is laughable.

sh1t mentality man, no girls these days who are under the age of 30 will EVER phone call unless you are already well established with her. I've had couagars who i've ****ed who refused to pick up the phone when i call..
Todays generation is all about the text, makes conversation alot easier and is alot lesser investment on her part. Play the game.. don't be stuck in the old ways. I admit, texting used to be a weak part of my game before, but its really coming along now, and i've built a WHOLE lot of rapport and comfort through text with alot of girls, and when i met up with them.. the foundation was already set. Easy to get lays.
OP did awesome when he flipped the script.. she was used to you being a pansy and asking to meet up over and over and was suprised when you were brisk and short. That with you playing It cool on the day sealed it. Great work man.

Exactly, I have fvcked a few chicks and never had a phone convo with them until we met in person. If a chick is in class, at work, or out, she will use text. It is instant communication and a great text will have her thinking of you and wanting you if you do it right. Why guy refuse to enhance theitrr game is beyond me.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

sh1t mentality man, no girls these days who are under the age of 30 will EVER phone call unless you are already well established with her. I've had couagars who i've ****ed who refused to pick up the phone when i call..
Todays generation is all about the text, makes conversation alot easier and is alot lesser investment on her part. Play the game.. don't be stuck in the old ways. I admit, texting used to be a weak part of my game before, but its really coming along now, and i've built a WHOLE lot of rapport and comfort through text with alot of girls, and when i met up with them.. the foundation was already set. Easy to get lays.
OP did awesome when he flipped the script.. she was used to you being a pansy and asking to meet up over and over and was suprised when you were brisk and short. That with you playing It cool on the day sealed it. Great work man.

You know what's funny? I remember I did a thread on here talking about how bad texting was, and some guy pointed out that back in the day picking up the phone and talking to a girl for hours on end was considered a b*tch move that made you less likely to get with her.

At the end of the day, the best way to build up rapport with a woman you just met, is to do it in person. So, whether you're texting, calling, messaging, etc., the bottom line is you should be using these avenues to set up the date. If you find yourself trying to do this and do like the OP did (where, to his credit, he WAS using texting to get a date), but find your advances not being taken...

...at that point, the more you text, the more desperate you look. Look at how long the OPs texting was - even he himself pointed out the parts where he wasn't coming across too well as a result of the text he was sending. All it did was give her a long scroll on her phone of a guy she was losing interest in. He played it smart at the end and got with her, but it was as a result of suddenly NOT sending her constant messages.

Look, I'm aware of the slight generation gap there may be, given that I'm 30 and many of you on this board are... well, less than 30, LoL. But real talk, no matter what new technologies come along that allow you to communicate with a chick, in person is always going to be best. Gab-festing via text or messaging services isn't all you guys are making it cracked up to be. You miss out on all the other cues you need to read to see if she likes you - things like her touching you, batting her eyes, walking close to you, listening to her voice inflections when she says stuff to you... none of this stuff can be picked up via text messaging. (Video messaging, yes, but not text.)

If you're a person that's got "texting game," kudos to you. However, for the majority of guys out there it's a BAAAAAAAAD idea to rely on texting to raise and/or keep a girl's interest level. Most of these guys are just hiding behind texting so they can try to sound like someone they're really not - and even then, they usually end up failing at it by saying the wrong thing and then trying to beg for her approval. Or, if they DO convince her of how witty they are via text, they meet up with her in person and end up screwing it up anyway!

All things that only help to LOWER her interest level. I'm telling you guys, stay off the texting - at the very least, don't be the one to initiate it unless you're asking for a date. Anything else is just plain suicide.

 

[NewAndImproved]

Gab-festing via text or messaging services isn't all you guys are making it cracked up to be. You miss out on all the other cues you need to read to see if she likes you - things like her touching you, batting her eyes, walking close to you, listening to her voice inflections when she says stuff to you... none of this stuff can be picked up via text messaging. (Video messaging, yes, but not text.)

Hate to be another guy to rain on your "Texting Kills Relationships" parade but I have to disagree with this a bit.

Obviously you can pick up on IOIs best in person and those in person are also the most significant.

However, that doesn't mean texting can't give cues of interest, too. Good text game has a kind of "tempo" to it where the girl is complying, adding to the conversation (no one word response or just hahha s), mirroring (certain words, punctuation, time of response) and amplifying. Obviously I'm not talking about a "hey how was your day" text.

 

[Packers2010]

She obviously has to be interested in you man.Try talking to her more and get to know her more (Without showing that you're needy). In time you should meet with her (have a drink with her etc..) have FUN with her. If she didn't text back, don't keep texting/Facebook messaging her and show that you're a needy dude (Chicks find the neediness unattractive, it's a b!tch trait) you should have more options than just her. If she's ignoring you she's not interested. Move on.

-GearsGod

yeah man.. don't worry.. i knew this was going to happen. i have one other girl i am trying on atm. though i should be going out tonight so.