How does a man take disrespect like THIS?

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Originally posted by johnfjr
so what you mean is that she's looking for a "prize"...but if she wants to marry me, wouldn't that make me the "prize" she wants to get "tied down" with? How can I take offense to that?

You're an object. You're a resource for her own use. Yes, it is true that men are SUPPOSED to be "resources". HOWEVER, you want a girl that RESPECTS you for being a resource, not USES you for being a resource. This is how things worked back in the 70s, 60s, 50s, etc. The man was the provider, the women respected this and returned the favour in other ways such as taking care of the house/children. Times have changed. Now girls like the one in question want it all. They'll expect you to give in to their every need and support them as the great resource that you are, but when it comes to give back, they are not there. This is the modern spoiled princess and you my friend are dating one.

So let's have a look. She openly tells you she can just go ahead and snag another "resource" like it was nothing. She says this as if she DESERVES everything she wants. She nags and cries when everything doesn't go her way (spoiled princess). All this time she is pretending there is an "emotion attachment", but this is just lie. Does this girl sounds like one that RESPECTS you for being a resource? I think not.

This is why you should take offense to that.

Or better yet. Go, get married and prove me right.

 

[Mix]

Re: Re: How does a man take disrespect like THIS?

She's not trash as others would suggest, she's simply a normal, confused, female. This does not excuse her behaviour. It was a childish way of doing things and you reacted perfectly. Dont let her comments get to you, they were not meant to be serious, just a cheap shot in a moment of emotion. Get used to it, that's how chicks are (some more than others, mind you)

I agree with this but I would qualify it and say she's "probably" not trash as others would suggest. Only you can be sure of that. Love can be blind though. If she pulls sh!t like this often, then you should probably find someone else.

Also, don't let her comments get to you. I can tell by your words that they ruffled your ego a bit. Many women know that a penis is a symbol of manhood and sometimes an emotional weak-point for men. Often, they use this to lash out. How many times (on TV or in life) have you heard a dumped woman insult the penis of her EX? She doesn't give a sh!t about it, she's just attacking a symbol of his manhood.

The fact that this woman strongly wants to marry you should be all the justification you need that you are desirable. So don't forget that. If she acts up, use her desire to marry you as motivation. Think, "She wanted to marry me badly. She's not so much different than the average women (by definition of the word "average") so there are many other women who will want me just as much if not more than her."

Originally posted by squirrels
Always forgive. But NEVER forget.

When she starts playing that, "Well I could get OTHER men any time I want" trying to pressure you into marriage, FLIP the game on her!

Great advice. Whenever someone acts out of line (be it a woman or a male friend) you HAVE TO check them on it. When it's youre woman, it's more serious because your relationship is deeper. In this situation, you have to make SURE that she will never try to pull that sh!t again.

You've already done a great job at handling the situation BUT DON'T give up your chance to check her. Like squirrels said, you have a good chance to flip it back in her face. For instance, IF SHE'S YOUR GIRLFRIEND, HOW THE FVCK DOES SHE KNOW THE SIZE OF THESE OTHER MEN'S ****S? That's not a question you're worried about (because you know she was just saying it out of anger) but you should play it up like it's a HUGE problem.

Basically, you want to highlight, underline, bold and fvcking underscore everything that was WRONG with what she said. Personally, I like to add a general feeling of loss . . . like something has changed for the worse since she's made that comment. It could be something small like, "you know, I was taking these massage classes and I really wanted to help you relax after work but now I just don't feel motivated, you know, after that incident you pulled, I went ahead and cancelled." Or something huge like your general opinion of her has declined.

Make her feel like her actions had a price. Don't lie though. It has to be a real price (in the above example, she would have to know about the classes you were taking and have been looking forward to you giving her massages).

 

[JohnJones]

Her comment was out of line (if a dude said something to his girl about the size of her chest or how thinner girls would flock to him, etc., she'd have flown off the handle) and, to me, puts her into a bad category of woman that she'll have a hard time climbing out of.

Only you can decide whether you're interested in keeping her around (was this the first time something like this happened etc.). But your response was perfectly fine.

 

[NewMan]

You did well.

She want's a reaction from you.

You didn't give her what she wanted...

Ending the conversation and taking her home is exactly what you needed to do.

Understand though, she was saying this because of your lack of communication on the issue at hand. You need to communicate your feelings on the issue to her and end her questions once and for all. It's unfair any other way.

so tell her your not ready yet - and if she cannot deal with it she needs to move on.

 

[yunghova35]

i DID not write this, i aint even orginally post it but it fits, TY to WHOEVA posted this,...

David told his newest of two cats listen in order to stay here you must 1. Use the litter box 2. not rip any of my slippers 3. stay off of the furniture because I am alergic to cat fur, if you disobey this rules then you will be kicked out. David then left on a two day vacation.

Now whiskers the older cat told hormany, now listen this is a pretty good gig, david is a nice owner and if you follow his few simple rules then all will be good but if not you will be out in the cold. Hormany said nothing. An hour later as whiskers strolled through the kitchen he gasp! "Hormany what have you done?" He asked her. "I couldnt make it too the litter box so I had an accident on the floor, do you think David will be mad?" "David will be extremely mad" Whiskers said.

Harmony was saddened because she like the new place she was living so she sat in the corner for the two days it took David to get back, only moving to go eat and use the litter box. Two days later David returned to a gasp "What is this? Hormony, Whiskers which one of you did this?" Whiskers looked at harmony who put her head down in shame. "It was you harmony wasn't it? I am so mad at you, I told you the rules why did you do this?"

As Dave vented Harmony begin to purr and walk around his legs rubbing his leg. David looked down at the cute eyes of Harmony, and picked her up and felt soft inside. "Ok Ill forgive you this once, since you are new here silly cat, but dont' let this happen again." David put her down then proceeded to clean up the cat poo under the watchful eye of whiskers and hormony.

A day later David yelled "whiskers, Hormany!" As they came running to their loving master they halted as they seen his angry face. "Okay which one of you scratched up my new slippers?" Once again whiskers looked at hormany. "It was you wasn't it hormany?" Hormany purred and rubbed on David's leg. David looked down and shook his head, "what am I going to do with you you naughty cat? Alright you guys go play now." Whiskers casted a suspicious gaze at hormany who purred and walked away.

Later that evening whiskers walked into the living room to see Hormany on the couch next to David as he watched TV. Whisker was shocked. Hormany look at him then laid back down and watched TV with David. This went on for about 2 weeks until whiskers couldn't take it anymore. Later that night whiskers approached Hormany. "Hormany how did you get David to put you on the couch, he has never put me on the couch and I have been his pet for 5 years?"
"Who said David put me on the couch?" Hormany asked.
"Well if he didn't put you on there how did you get up there?"
"Eazy I jumped on there."
"YOu jumped on there, but wasn't you scared you would get in trouble hormany?"
"Of course not whiskers."
"Why not?"
"Because I knew he wouldnt do anything, that's why?"
"How did you know this?"
"It's ez I pooped on the floor when he told me he "would" kick me out if I did and he did nothing. I did that when i actually thought he might kick me out. Now if he didnt do anything to me when I actually thought he would why would I listen to him after I knew he would forgive me." On that note Hormany jumped off of the couch and proceed to head to the bed room. "where are you going?" whiskers asked.
"David just got some new shoes I would really like to play with, would you like to join me?"
After thinking for a second whiskers followed behing him "Sure, I've always wanted to know how it would feel to tear some of his shoes apart, and besides what is he going to do anyway?" They both laughed as they headed towards David's bedroom



HI DAVID!!!!!

 

[DeathDealer]

bro you did well. basically she wants to know how committed you are to her, you aren't obviously and she obviously isn't the biggest catch out there cause if she was you'd marry her right away (i guess???) you see - this is where women are super weak and they try to compensate by putting you down cause it's their only way.

but you gotta look at this another way, words hurt and i'm sure she's thought of those things too.. such as going for another guy or thinking your penis is small and such.

you can take a break or let it slide for a bit but know she will keep pressuring you on this crap. next time fool give out more info such as how long you've been both dating and such, b1tch.

 

[spider_007]

If it was me, i would have told her to get the f%ck out right on the spot. When you'r ready to start a family of your own (mentaly and financialy) you'll know it, but untill then don't let some biAch push you into anything. Remember ur the MAN. You are the one with the balls (even tho they'r small). You wana make sure; if you have to get merried, that you only have to do it once. You must be 100% sure, othervise it will be VERY EXPENCIVE (and im not just talking about the shirt on your back) And if you do have any concerns about her, then you need to stop wasting your time and hers and move on. On the other hand if she is THE ONE, you need to throw her a bone, and let her now that eventualy it will happen, but that she needs to leave you alone, untill ur ready. Women like to start dreamning and wondering........ even if its just a short term relationship. But u need to decide if 30 years from now when she is old and fat (all of women get fat & ugly eventualy, just look around) if you would still wana be with her.

which ever way you decide, you need to be honest, and tell her the truth (and not in that mushy & wussy way eather).

 

[LostDon]

Some of you guys are charismatic enough, also remember there are feelings there, so simply saying bye b!tch isn't going to be easy.

I think you handled it kind of well. There are a couple of things i would of personally changed. First, I would not of even showed any emotion at all. I would of been less assertive. Females have a tendency to say stuff, and then go back in there minds and be like "Oh ****, did I really just say that." They intend for you to flip out and get mad.

A key example is, a female will say something like, that's why I f*cked your bestfriend. When she probably hasn't. But, don't get mad in these situations. Simply express little emotion. Even though inside you may want to say. B!tch have you lost your f*cking mind. Simply give it a passing thought. See when you said I don't want to talk about it and took her home. She knew she found that button to push.

Had you of, said something like. "ok" and didn't show any emotion. She would of wondered 2 things. 1. does he really care about me if he is not mad. 2. How mad did I just make him.

See someone is most mad when they say something. When someone is screaming, they are just showing off. But, when someone is quiet. You don't know what they are thinking.

So where you are now. You have to decide if this is the type of person that you want to be around. That and you have to stop ignoring the marriage question. Tell her flat out, you don't want to get married right now. If she asks why, personal reasons. (This is a double edged sword. She won't know if it is because of what she said of if it is something really personal)

But, from here on, you have got to show that disrespect like that will not be tolerated. You don't treat her like that, and you won't be treated like that.

 

[00Kevin]

Sit back and consider a simple solution to this problem

I would make the following statements very clear to her

Tell her that you are not afraid of marriage and that you just want to have a girl friend for a while.

Tell her that if you didn't consider her marriage material you would of dumped her already.

Tell her that Love is patient.

Think about that last one. If this girl is in love with you for REAL she won't be so worried about getting married so quickly. Marriage isn't somethign that you just do out of passion. It is a major LIFE changing event!


I've had the same problem with girl friends before. They want to jump into marriage but they don't want to enjoy just having a great boyfriend for a while. I would never put a ring on a girls finger unless she was my gf for at least 3 years.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Johnny boy, you were too nice to this hor!!!! How do you think she knows their penis size??? Only hors talk like this - here is what you do ........ tell her that for that comment she could be your hor when you want her otherwise you don't want a relationship with a disrespectful hor!!!!

Remember Hors cry too!!!! Never have pity on a hor - she is looking for sympathy and will try to make you feel guilt!!! Don't fall for it!

Do this to her...HoSlap.net