HOw do you respond to NO call/No show!

[Jukeboxhero]

I had a Halloween Party this weekend and I had invited a few girls to come. Some I didn't really expect to show up but a few in particular I really thought they would.

For instance, this one actually called me back several times to arrange on gettin her directions. I wrote them down and arranged to meet her at the bar to give them to her. She couldn't make it but she sent her friend there for the main purpose of picking up the directions. Later that same night she called me to tell me her cel phone and been shutoff because she was short on paying the bill. Later she called me again because she thought her friend lost the directions (although she found them in her purse while she was leaving a message). In the same message she also wanted confirm what day and time it was.


The next day I called her back to remind her of the day and time and see if had everything she needed. I also suggested maybe meeting somewhere beforehand and going together. She said that sounded like fun. Unfortunately I didn't have time to do that Saturday (last night) because I was still shopping for costumes.

Anyways, I guess it could've been my fault because the directions may not have detailed enough or perhaps because I didn't call to tell her I wasn't going to be able to meet up with her. I did try but it was a little later in the day.

So the only thing I can rationalize is that my directions weren't detailed enough (I don't know if I wrote down the street address but I did give her the name of all the streets and the a major landmark (right beside this child's playground) or she got lost and didn't have a cel phone to call me on. I'm sure she wanted to come or she wouldn't have called me almost everyday of the week to get directions and tell me what she was coming dressed as.

Also, I had a few other girls say they would come if I gave them directions. Some I didn't get directions to but the one I did, Did NOT show up either.
So how would you approach these situations?

P.s. These girls are mostly just friends right now, or people I met at a bar. Not girlfriends or anyone I spend a lotta money on.

Also, I'm kinda glad they didn't show up because I had a friend who always tries to get girls drunk while getting drunk himself and acting extremely obnoxious and makign a fool of himself. He also assumes any other single girl at the party is as drunk as he is and would probably try to hit on them and get laid. Anyways, that's a side note. I could tell them about that so it doesn't sound like a big deal that they didn't show up.
So what would u suggest I do?

 

[JH6]

i've found that alot of people (not just girls) make multiple plans so that they endup doing "Something" on a weekend night. When the time comes to go out they pick and choose what sounds best to them, or what is going to have the hottest "targets". So basically you got bumped.

You can a) worry about it and that gets you nowhere or b) give her a call and say oh you should have made it, oh well your loss, we had a great time, etc. My vote is to give her the choice B call, then say hey what are you doing on such and such a date, we can either do this or we can do this. If she isn't receptive to either, then she doesn't want you next her. If she agrees then you have a date setup, now if she ditches you here she's a piece of trash.

I've gotten ditched a couple times, just don't let it bother you. When your dating a ton of broads, its bound to happen no matter what you look like.

 

[penkitten]

no call /no show = no job / no way/ no respect/ no you


perhaps there was a devastating interferrence that prevented her from calling like aliens showed up and took her away. simple things that come up, like having to work, car probs, whatever , can be explained in a phone call before you were suppose to meet her.

 

[DonJuanMonk]

Reading your post was like watching two trains filled with lots of people crashing together in slow-motion. Read your post again you'll see your own errors

 

[insidious]

Originally posted by DonJuanMonk
Reading your post was like watching two trains filled with lots of people crashing together in slow-motion. Read your post again you'll see your own errors

I've seen my own errors pointed out on this site and I am infinitely thankful for the frankness found here.

Especially when sprinkled with humor, the hard truths are so much easier to swallow

 

[DonJuanMonk]

Originally posted by insidious
I've seen my own errors pointed out on this site and I am infinitely thankful for the frankness found here.

Especially when sprinkled with humor, the hard truths are so much easier to swallow

Yeh no probs. :woo: :woo: :woo:

 

[Warrior Princess]

Tell her that you weren't even aware of her not showing up

........because you were too busy partying.

They will feel bad, but they deserve it. OR if you want to be nice you can whine.

Good luck!

Meg

 

[Gonzalo]

Come on guys, no need to run and call to confront the girl. Either she had car problems/ her cat ate some tainted candy, OR she decided to go someplace else. If it's the former, she'll call and say sorry she missed it. If it's the latter, her loss, no need to confront her since she doesn't really CARE. Whining will only make you look like a little *****. Keep the coolness.

G

 

[DinoCassanova]

I would respond to no call / no show w/a freezeout. No emails, voice mails, anything, unless or until she contacts you first. If she hasn't done that by next weekend I would erase her number from your phone and forget you ever met her.

 

[EquityPrivate]

Originally posted by Jukeboxhero
I had a Halloween Party this weekend and I had invited a few girls to come. Some I didn't really expect to show up but a few in particular I really thought they would.

For instance, this one actually called me back several times to arrange on gettin her directions. I wrote them down and arranged to meet her at the bar to give them to her. She couldn't make it but she sent her friend there for the main purpose of picking up the directions. Later that same night she called me to tell me her cel phone and been shutoff because she was short on paying the bill. Later she called me again because she thought her friend lost the directions (although she found them in her purse while she was leaving a message). In the same message she also wanted confirm what day and time it was.

The next day I called her back to remind her of the day and time and see if had everything she needed. I also suggested maybe meeting somewhere beforehand and going together. She said that sounded like fun. Unfortunately I didn't have time to do that Saturday (last night) because I was still shopping for costumes.

Anyways, I guess it could've been my fault because the directions may not have detailed enough or perhaps because I didn't call to tell her I wasn't going to be able to meet up with her. I did try but it was a little later in the day.

Ok, lots of problems here.

First... Girl Got Issues(tm). She sounds like a major flake.

Second, nothing is your fault, even when it's your fault. I know that sounds crass, but it's what works.

This is the worst part of your post so far: "The next day I called her back to remind her of the day and time and see if had everything she needed."

You going to put her makeup on for her too? Seriously.

So the only thing I can rationalize is that my directions weren't detailed enough (I don't know if I wrote down the street address but I did give her the name of all the streets and the a major landmark (right beside this child's playground) or she got lost and didn't have a cel phone to call me on. I'm sure she wanted to come or she wouldn't have called me almost everyday of the week to get directions and tell me what she was coming dressed as.

Do you have any idea how many calories you just burned? How much angst you just wasted? Girl can't find her way out of a paper bag when she has directions and a paper knife.

You have One-itis here.

NEXT.

Also, I had a few other girls say they would come if I gave them directions. Some I didn't get directions to but the one I did, Did NOT show up either.
So how would you approach these situations?

P.s. These girls are mostly just friends right now, or people I met at a bar. Not girlfriends or anyone I spend a lotta money on.

Also, I'm kinda glad they didn't show up because I had a friend who always tries to get girls drunk while getting drunk himself and acting extremely obnoxious and makign a fool of himself. He also assumes any other single girl at the party is as drunk as he is and would probably try to hit on them and get laid. Anyways, that's a side note. I could tell them about that so it doesn't sound like a big deal that they didn't show up.
So what would u suggest I do?

Let me get this straight. You're sorry they didn't come but you're glad they didn't come because your friend might have been an ass when they were there?

Stop throwing parties. I don't think you have it together enough for this to end well.

Go out instead.

 

[EquityPrivate]

Originally posted by DinoCassanova
I would respond to no call / no show w/a freezeout. No emails, voice mails, anything, unless or until she contacts you first. If she hasn't done that by next weekend I would erase her number from your phone and forget you ever met her.

Yep. I'm with Dino here.

I might hold off on the number erase for a little while. Not long tho.

She might get a chance to explain herself. That often works to your advantage if you play the freeze out right.

 

[Jukeboxhero]

Originally posted by DonJuanMonk
Reading your post was like watching two trains filled with lots of people crashing together in slow-motion. Read your post again you'll see your own errors

Ok, maybe I was a bit too accomodating or called her back too much. Why don't you tell me how you would've handled it?

If a girl wants to go to a party she needs Directions and date and time right? I probably should have written them down on the directions and I could've done it in less phone calls. Tell me what other mistakes I made?

Also, thanks for everyone that actually gave me advice. I probably was a bit too accomodating trying to "help" her be able to come.

The strange thing is she actually called me several times, returned my calls to make sure she had directions ALL that stuff that seemed to indicate a Woman who was a solid show-up.

Strange thing is, when I first met her in the bar she thought she thought she knew me from somewhere and was super friendly and initiated loads of kino. She even sat on my lap and gave a light kiss on the cheek after I got her number and walked away.

 

[DonJuanMonk]

Yo dude, it doesn't matter if you were too accomodating or what mistakes you shouldn't have made. Why did I not give you an answer like some other "DJs" - I read your post and I cannot offer you any solution as there is way too much to work on, I am very confident you will solve any probs.

Btw, try not to read into too much on what the girl is doing. Just concentrate on getting @ss, everything else is just fluff.