How do you handle the waiting game?

[Alpha-A]

How do you best handle the following situation:

Scenario:
You know that a girl is very interested in you, but she still only calls once in a while. If you call her up and come with any type of suggestion she is most often up to it. She has expressed her feelings and liking for you many times, so it doesn't look like it is a playing-hard-to-get-routine.


What to do?
1. Playing the same game back. Which might not lead to any result if she doesn't see it as a problem.
2. Taking distance from her byt telling her that she is a nice girl and everything but you consider yourself to be on different levels. Some may see this as showing weakness, but remember, you are the one taking distance from her, and if she really likes you she must change for you.
3. Stop answering calls from her. If she asks why you didn't answered or called back, you say that you have been very busy and had a lot on your mind.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

What is your desired outcome?

You tell us the situation, but the real question is, what do you want out of this situation with this particular one?

 

[thesnowman]

if it aint broke then dont fix it. The whole idea is to reward her for good behaviour & punish her for bad behaviour. If she's well in to you & not putting any obstacles in the way then fine, keep doing what you are doing. Anything other than this & you will be the one putting obstacles in the way.

 

[Alpha-A]

Gangster of love,
you are right. I should be clearer in my question. The desired outcome is that you want her to call you when she thinks of you as normal people do. And yeah, you know that she thinks of you a lot, because she has said that very clearly and besides you know that she is really interested in you.

thesnowman,
right now, this woman is probably not totally comfortable with this situation. Not if she is normal. But some people need some help to change their bad behaviors.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

What do you want with this girl? You're playing games, and I don't mean it in a negative way, but you're not stating where you want this to end. Are you just testing techinques? Do you want to date this one? Do you want to have sex with her? What is your outcome, your goal?

 

[Alpha-A]

I want people around me to be honest and act honestly. If she has any chance to be my girlfriend she must stop behave like that. And I'm trying to game her out of her bad habits. All people don't act rationally. I guess no one does it all the time.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

How do you best handle the following situation:

Scenario:
You know that a girl is very interested in you, but she still only calls once in a while. If you call her up and come with any type of suggestion she is most often up to it. She has expressed her feelings and liking for you many times, so it doesn't look like it is a playing-hard-to-get-routine.

behaving like what? Sounds like she's open and willing for you to make a move? Please explain why, where, and what your doubts are with this one?

Are both of you in high school? How old are both of you? sounds like you're playing the waiting game. Looks like she's the one waiting for you to put a serious move.

 

[Alpha-A]

Ok, I should have been much clearer to begin with.

The phone thing was just one of the issues. So let me fill you in with more info.

She has said many times of things WE should do together and things she will do for me. She has said that she should make a dinner for me, that she will bake for me. And when I once asked if we should travel away within a short time, she said yes let's do that. But instead she decided to go away with some of her friends this week. She didn't even bother to meet me to say good-bye. And when she comes back she is off for another travel to see a friend abroad for THREE weeks. So now you might see why I think it was very irritating that she didn't even gave me a kiss good-bye before the trip.

Who knows, I might be away on a travel when she gets back, and maybe we don't see each other for many many weeks.

But as I said, she has told me herself that she has some personal problems that I don't want to go into detail with. But that makes me understand that she is unbalanced now.

I just want to fix her bad behavior. Are you understanding me now?

 

[Omen]

But as I said, she has told me herself that she has some personal problems that I don't want to go into detail with. But that makes me understand that she is unbalanced now.

What woman ISN'T unbalanced?

I had this woman once who always seemed to have PMS, or tell me she was just tired, and she tried to use that excuse all the time and I got sick of it. Not that she doesn't have a valid excuse, but as a guy, we have to be cautious at to how many times a woman tells us they have problems, and when they are and aren't true.