How do you handle super confident girls?

odawg

Don Juan
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Hey guys,

I was wondering how you guys handle very confident, talkitive girls. l I went on a date last night with a girl that I am kind of seeing, but she is like uber, super, crazy confident. To be honest, her confidence stifles me somewhat, as I feel her personality outshines mine.

When I see this girl out in a club, I am always the man, and I don’t have the problems that I do with her in a date scenario. A combination of alcohol and high social proof usually makes me well equipped to act the man and I can usually handle her very easily on a night out.

However, when I get her on a 1-1 date scenario, her confidence seems to baffle me and I start getting in my own head. I am not sure how much she notices, but she is bound to notice somewhat. I still try the old ****y and funny approach, but I just don’t have the same fluency with it as I normally do when she is so dominating.

Her personaility is great though, but she is just a lot more confident than most girls.


Thanks in advance guys.
 

Who Dares Win

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I would say something that for many users wont make any sense but it worked for me in a similar scenario.

Going out with this hot chick who get hitted from many guys who even declared their love for her and became jealousy beasts right after.
What I find it actually works best is simple being honest and outcome not dependant, treat her with respect but not admiration, show that you consider her a worth individidual but not someone who intimidates you.

If you go heavy with negs she will smell it, girls no matter if clever or stupid have a very high social intelligence by default.
What you want is being different, strong and firm but at the same time good and mature( imagine russel crow on the gladiator to have grasp of what Im saying)...not like afcs kissing her ass and being intimated from her or guys playing mind games she already saw countless times.

As usual avoid being needy or clingy, let it show that you like her since she already know but at the same time show that you are in control.
 

odawg

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Yea, I don't wana neg too much now- but I think that I will ramp them up a tiny bit.

Generally I'm fine, when I see her out and I'm texting, phone game..its just when we get into a date scenario she starts talking and talking and I don't get to dominate like I would like too...
 

sighsigh

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Yeah, I encounter this sometimes. To be honest I find this very unattractive in a woman. These are masculine traits. I want my woman to be generally quiet, submissive, etc. To be feminine.

Girls who have masculine tendencies don't need as much masculinity aimed at them. As Pook says, you should match her femininity with your masculinity: if she is 80% feminine you should be 80% masculine, if she is 50% feminine you should be 50% masculine, and so on.

My point is that I don't think fighting masculinity with even more masculinity is the answer. You just need to suck it up that she is more dominating than you would like... and leave it at that. Don't change the way you act, because I don't think you can fix this problem. Don't feel bad about feeling AFC, because in this scenario being AFC isn't so damaging.
 

odawg

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Hmmmm....she's certainly not masculine. She is a Hollister model! However, a few of my friends who also work in the Hollister store mentioned that she is one of the loudest people in the shop.lol.
 

odawg

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To be honest, I love her personality, and the fact that she is very confident and talkitive and extremely confident is very attractive to me!

Just looking for a few tips on how to handle her!?
 
P

perseverance

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You don't need to handle her, just relax and be yourself.

If she steps out of line and offends you, then make it known, etc.

Never worry about what someone else is doing, always worry about what you're doing and the fact that this woman intimidates you is just silly. You should be glad that your date went smoothly, the amount of dates I've been on where the girl in question was in shy and reserve-mode is stupid. I'd much rather have a confident girl over a shy and reserved one anyday of the weak. I certainly wouldn't be intimidated by her confidence, in fact I'd respect a girl who is genuinely confident. Most women are deeply insecure and hide behind their foundation, their extensions etc, so it would be nice to meet a woman with genuine confidence.
 

odawg

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I do completely agree. I guess the fact that most girls I know are completely the opposite of her I am a little intimidated...I know I shouldn't be. I have been with hotter, but most girls like to be dominated and I am sure she does do.

My intimation probably comes down to an insecurity or something, so probably my problem rather than hers!
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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