this question goes to to men who have had successful relationships with attractive women and avoided simping. how do you make a woman prove herself to you instead of the other way around?
I had 2 relationships with women I found very attractive, and one was more successful than the other so I'll try to describe what worked for each:
The Good One - She was a super sweet, tradwife type. Didn't really have to try to do anything here, just treated her well and she treated me well. There was no power dynamic and nobody "wore the pants". Some dates she treated me, other dates I treated her, and we weren't keeping score. The only reason that relationship didn't work out was because I was young and not ready to settle down like she was. When I broke up with her I felt bad because she had been cheated on in her other relationships (low body count, and I believe her), and I imagine it felt s***ty that the first loyal guy "rejects" her. But we're still friends and on good terms, she's married to a guy now who hopefully treats her well.
The Bad One - Very hot, very wealthy, but a total mess. She had BPD and while the sex was amazing, we fought a lot over things that weren't actually issues. One of our first major fights was around Christmas time because, and I kid you not, I put my hand on her sister's waist to move past her in the kitchen...she thought that was flirtatious and it became a HUGE issue...Anyway, the way I avoided simping for her, and exerted some level of control, was because I'm the only guy in her life who's told her "no" and is able to walk away from her and her bulls***. I didn't use it as a tactic, but I left her house and drove home on more than one occasion, and blocked her a few times. It was a difficult relationship because I didn't know what a "normal" amount of fighting looked like, and knowing she has BPD and had a really abusive upbringing led to me trying to be more tolerant of her behavior. Eventually, that didn't work out because I got tired of fighting, and she noted that I was the first guy that ever broke up with her.
So, TL;DR: Always be willing to walk away and say no. Don't reward bad behavior but DO make sure to reward good behavior. Treating your woman well is not simping if she's returning the favor.