how do you deal with ONEITIS and REJECTION?

[ultra dj]

This is a long one.

I'm suffering from a REALLY bad case of one-itis and rejection...sh1t! I just need some input on the situation, and how to deal with it.

For the past couple of months, I've been "friends" with this HB9 girl...she's very cool and level-headed which was a nice change, and her family is also EXTREMELY rich. She doesn't really need to work.

I know what you're going to say, "being friends with a girl is AFC"...but it wasn't a close friendship, and it was good social proof.

Only reason I was "friends", was because she had a VERY SERIOUS BF. I TOTALLY liked this girl, but I remained DJ, hit on other girls, and kept my feelings neutral.

She got rid of her BF about 3 weeks ago, and we began to spend a bit more time together...I figured a chick getting out of a relationship wouldn't want to get into another one, especially 2 weeks after she ended one, so i still kept my feelings neutral.

We'd talk more at school and overall she was a bit more flirty. We definitely connected, and there was some nice kino going on. Even with this, i got a bit of a mixed signal.

Guys hit on this chick all the time, so i figure being a HB9, I'll take away the attention i've been giving her and let her come to me. That way if she liked me at all, i'd be able to sense it and she'll be the one doing the chasing.

After a few days, she noticed immediatly that we hadn't talked in a while and approached me on it. I remained freindly but aloof. There was going to be a student "talent" night at our school in about 1 week time, and she asked me to play the piano for her while she sings. It was cool that she asked me. We figured we'd hook up in a few days and I determined it would be a good time to get her alone, see what the vibe is like, ask her out.

In class the same day, this AMOG in class who she has never spoken to asks her out...and she accepted...

sh1t!

Of course, now all those feelings i kept "neutral" didn't remain neutral at all...i started to feel jealousy and regret. The saying, "a girl waits for no one" entered my mind. Again, I tried throwing those feelings away to remain DJ.

We were both at a party last week and I still got a good vibe from her. While we were all drunk, one of her friends commented on how much i liked her right in front of her...I figured HB9 would have figured it out by now so it wasn't a big deal...it was just now out in the open.

I called her up on Sunday to see if we were going to get together to rehearse her song for the show, but only got her answering machine...i didn't leave a message and i'm sure she has call display. She never called back.

I figured, okay...if she even liked me at all if i play the whole "aloof" thing, be friendly, but not go out of my way to talk to her then she'll approach...

NOTHING!!

I see this chick almost everyday in school...i remained "friendly", but definitely not the same as we've been...

I don't even think she cared. It's been a week since the party and she hasn't said a word. I'm not voiding her or anything, we'll say "hi" if i pass her or if she approaches, but i'm playing the whole, "aloof" thing.

She never brought up the song again, and on talent night she was COLD...a smile here and there, but something wasn't there... and guess who was playing piano with her? Yup...AMOG.

I thought my feelings were burried, but they weren't...i was PI$$ED!!! She was all flirty with him, same stuff as she was doing with me...they hugged and kissed after the show and it bothered me to hell!

MAJOR one-itis.

Some of our mutual friends (girls) who were in the audience i approached and I got cold vibe from THEM!!! I used to hang out with them cuz they were cool, and it made for some good social proof, but the vibe was SHYTE!!! I assumed that we'd all be heading out for a drink afterwards, but after the shytty vibe, i just fvcked off.

WTF!!!

Besides, the AFC way i was feeling wouldn't have been good anyway...that AMOG would have been there and seeing them all over each other would have pissed me off.

Anyway...the DJ is crying out, "there was obviously no attraction from her end, so it should be no big loss. Move on to another chick, like that model in class who seemes cool, and NEXT!!"

But FEELINGS SUCK!!!!

I guess because of this whole "rejection" feeling combined with "one-itis", I'm second guessing ALL MY ACTIONS, what i should have done, shouldn't have done, what i should do now...all AFC...

I'm trying to get this chick out of my head, and i figure remaining freindly, but distant and aloof is the key...especially because she's a HB9. Then of course the AFC is saying, "no remain friends...that way when she ends it with this rebound guy i can make my move."...yuck even typing that makes me sick.

I'm at the point where i'm recognizing the AFC stuff I'm doing, but confused if and when the stuff I'm doing is DJ.

I thought of remaining as "normal" to keep up the social proof with her, but almost all of her friends are guys, so i couldn't even use her as a "pivot" to another girl. So that would be pointless...

I just need some affirmation that the decision to remain aloof and not put any effort into a "freindship" is a DJ one, and not one based on AFC jealousy.

She is eventually going to ask "why" were not talking anymore, but not sure what the hell to say...do i play dumb? Do i mention that i thought is was better i backed off as she seemed into that other guy?

Any ideas?

Thanks for your help guys...

 

[Sir Lancelot]

I'm in the EXACT same situation as you man, I know how you feel. I've had one-itis with an HB9 for a while, and I recently saw the starting football QB putting his mack on her and succeeding.

I think you're on the right track however, acting 'aloof'. The best thing to do is to probably try and forget about her for a while.

 

[iqqi]

resident remales viewpoint...

Originally posted by ultra dj
I know what you're going to say, "being friends with a girl is AFC"...but it wasn't a close friendship, and it was good social proof.

being friends with a girl is not AFC. only if you are frustrated. whiiiiich...you are! so therefor, i would have to inform you that you were NOT friends with this chic. you liked her more than friends.

reading further into the situation, i would say that there is one of two things going on here.

1. she sees you as a friend. oh well. you can debate and debate and what have you, but i have to say that IMO, if a girl ever sees you as just a friend, you probaly didn't have a real shot anyways. this is not a good scenario in your case because you have oneitis!

or

2. she is interested in you too, but confused whether you really like her like that, or if she is ready for a real relationship with you.




now for her thinking. ( i am a girl, in case you are unawares.)

just recently i was with a guy. (this is RARE, i am picky). when i was with him it was like every guy in the universe both could not believe it (iqqi...is taken...meaning she actually WAS available...doh!!!) and wanted to take his place. it was baaad. buuut, now i am not with him (yes yes, a very sad story, sigh). and guess what? these guys who were fcuking LEECHES one wwek before and completely obvious? they are not so obvious anymore. that would be why i was not into THEM in the first place. why? you ask? because they are not serious.

they aren't willing to put in serious effort. they aren't willing to possibly face serious rejection. they most likely aren't ready for a serious relationship. they just aren't serious. so why oh why would i take them seriously?

your girl could be feeling this way about you. "oh he wanted me when i was with my ex, but now he has cold feet. he just wanted what he couldn't have, not me."

another possibility. this guy who asked her out? buffer boy. rebound. better him than you...trust me.

keep your distance so that you don't melt into the scenery of LJBF zone, and keep the mystery (does he like me? does he not like me?) in this case it is probaly great it is like this.


then after reading what happened with her acting all cold towards you, and her friends too, i really think she thought you liked her, and then when you had your chance you decide to act aloof, she probaly didn't take that too well.

this does NOT mean it was your fault!! i hope you were atleast sensitive to her break up (since you supposedly care about chic) but you are not her ego-licker, and unless she has demostrated her desire for YOU, you do not have to keep demonstrating yours for her. capishe?

reciprocation is the key word in this entire situation. if it is not there, that is probaly just the tip of the iceburg for this yet untitled romance.

 

[iqqi]

how do you deal....

you get a fun new crush.

or in DJ speak, fclose 10 hot babes.

 

[THA REALNESS]

Pimp more post less.

 

[ultra dj]

Re: resident remales viewpoint...

Thanks iqqi,

Originally posted by iqqi
being friends with a girl is not AFC. only if you are frustrated. whiiiiich...you are! so therefor, i would have to inform you that you were NOT friends with this chic. you liked her more than friends.

Yeah...i agree with that one.

Originally posted by iqqi

they aren't willing to put in serious effort. they aren't willing to possibly face serious rejection. they most likely aren't ready for a serious relationship. they just aren't serious. so why oh why would i take them seriously?

your girl could be feeling this way about you. "oh he wanted me when i was with my ex, but now he has cold feet. he just wanted what he couldn't have, not me."

nah...that ain't it. I only REALLY started liking her AFTER she broke up with him. Yeah i was interested in her, but i kept my feelings at a low. Once i knew she was single, I started talking with her more, and then the other "feelings" emerged and we began hitting it off.

Originally posted by iqqi

another possibility. this guy who asked her out? buffer boy. rebound. better him than you...trust me.

Yeah, again i agree...

Originally posted by iqqi
keep your distance so that you don't melt into the scenery of LJBF zone, and keep the mystery (does he like me? does he not like me?) in this case it is probaly great it is like this.

yup

Originally posted by iqqi

then after reading what happened with her acting all cold towards you, and her friends too, i really think she thought you liked her, and then when you had your chance you decide to act aloof, she probaly didn't take that too well.

not sure about this one...her friends KNOW i like her...they've even brought it up. They think she isn't ready for anything, and said that she's never mentioned anything to them about her feelings towards me. Usually girls talk about the guys they like. If she didn't mention anything to her BEST FRIEND, then she probably had a LOW IL...

Originally posted by iqqi

this does NOT mean it was your fault!! i hope you were atleast sensitive to her break up (since you supposedly care about chic) but you are not her ego-licker, and unless she has demostrated her desire for YOU, you do not have to keep demonstrating yours for her. capishe?

capishe... Yeah, i was cool with her breakup...she infact still loves him. But since AMOG came into her life, there has been no reciprocation of ANYTHING...she's as distant towards me as i am to her. All of her attention is on this other guy.

So what am i supposed to do when she brings up the fact that I'm not talking to her?

 

[iqqi]

Re: Re: resident remales viewpoint...

Originally posted by ultra dj
So what am i supposed to do when she brings up the fact that I'm not talking to her?

i think that by not talking to her and acting distant you are playing yourself. be a man. quit acting like a prissy girl. be the better person here and treat her like nothing is wrong.

1. it is the right thing to do
2. it will make her think

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Holy ****!! How could still be so AFC and have MAJOR ONE-ITIS over a girl after knowing how to avoid this!!

Bro I'm going to be blunt with you, and your probably not going to like it very much, but someone has to say it.


This girl NEVER had romantic interest in you!! It was completely platonic! Friends, buddies, pals, amigos etc.

She's not stupid, she knew you liked her. I mean you even said the mutual friends mentioned it before, but obivious she wasn't interested because YOU TOOK AWAY THE MYSTERY!!

What is the #1 rule of being a PUA?

NEVER EVER EVER NEVER TELL A GIRL HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT HER UNTIL SHE TELLS YOU 1ST!!!

You really need to relax and let things flow!! You are analyzing and over analyzing waaaaaaay too much!! Good god, I could write a laundry list of things you've mentioned about this girl.


And the reason she was so cold to you at the talent show thing was because she probably didn't know you called to practice. She probably thought you just flaked on her without any rhyme or reason. Unless we are talking about a cell phone, then she obiviously knew you called.


Either way, your definitely already stuck in the LJBF zone hard-core!!! And Iqqi is right, cutting off all contact with her at this point would make you look even more AFC! Why? Because it shows her that your angry and whining since you didn't get what you want. Just treat her like anyone else that you know. Say hi to her when you can, smile and move on.

And for the love of God, find 5 new prospects and get over this dumb bi-tch!!


PIMP

 

[Befuddled]

you seem to like playing a lot of games. keep playing(sarcasm) while the real DJ AMOG or whatever gets the girl.

it's not totally your fault. trust me. i think it's safe to say we have all been there.

1. you made 'friends' with a HB, you were interested in (but just didnt admit it).

2. She had a boyfriend. from my experience, girls with bfs tend to be a heck of a lot more flirtatous than single girls. why ? maybe cause they feel like their taken and it's ok, or maybe they want to get their bf's jealous.

3. you WERE PROBABLY in the friendzone before they broke up, thats just how it is. make friends with girls with bfs , end up in friend zone (most of the time).

4. She was PROBABLY interested, hence the whole play the piano thing. you continued to play games etc, she probably thought you wernt interested and moved on.

now....the game you play. (aloof thing) is the one i almost always play unfortunately by instinct....and you know what, i almost always loose cause i take it a little too far. In fact my ONETIS (or whatever) was preety much the same as yours, which was when i found this site.

dont worry about it, your social proof is damaged. whatever you do now, do not confront her on this matter...just go on, and have a good time with the friends you do have.

keep us posted.

 

[Big Pappy]

Befuddled writes :

make friends with girls with bfs , end up in friend zone (most of the time).

Hey, I am friends with a couple of really cool chicks that have boyfriends. Now, after reading that and knowing the percentages of moving from friend zone to end zone, I'm wondering if maybe I should just avoid chicks in relationships totally.

All I can suggest is that you learn from this lesson. And, there seems to be a lot to learn.

First, how did you assess her interest level?
Second, when someone asks you to do them a favor, you really ought to let them do the contacting. No sense calling her, she needed you.

Now, here's a fair and valid question that I hope you'll get to ask.
She asked you to accompany her on the piano. Then she gets some other fellow to do it, and doesn't even have the courtesty to speak with you about it. (Hey, maybe this guy plays better than you. Still, she should have told you ahead of time. )

So, you played it cool. Aloof. See, I disagree with this "tactic".
There's a time and place for it, but I think after her break up, you should have brought her into your world. (search for pook's thread on that) Rebounds are not always horrible. I'm pretty sure that for every bad one, there's probably a good one. Consider the principle of making the intro within the first moment you see a girl. You jump right up and present yourself. Why should this opportunity be any different?

It takes a good bit of finesse to handle the circumstances as you described them with social grace. So, if nothing else, pat yourself on the back for that.

 

[ultra dj]

Actually Pimp, i liked your post...

Originally posted by Pimp-sicle

NEVER EVER EVER NEVER TELL A GIRL HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT HER UNTIL SHE TELLS YOU 1ST!!!

I didn't tell her...i kept my feelings neutral. Her friends only found out because I heard a rumour that she broke up with him, and i asked if that was true. Her friend then smiled and pieced it together...i never said anything other than that.

Originally posted by Pimp-sicle

You really need to relax and let things flow!! You are analyzing and over analyzing waaaaaaay too much!! Good god, I could write a laundry list of things you've mentioned about this girl.

I know, I know...belive me, part of this seems almost funny to me...

Originally posted by Pimp-sicle

And the reason she was so cold to you at the talent show thing was because she probably didn't know you called to practice. She probably thought you just flaked on her without any rhyme or reason. Unless we are talking about a cell phone, then she obiviously knew you called.

I called her on her cell phone and she has call display...so she knew I called. I didn't flake on her, in fact when i didn't see her in school on Monday, I asked he friend if she knew if she still needed me for the show.

Originally posted by Pimp-sicle

Either way, your definitely already stuck in the LJBF zone hard-core!!! And Iqqi is right, cutting off all contact with her at this point would make you look even more AFC! Why? Because it shows her that your angry and whining since you didn't get what you want. Just treat her like anyone else that you know. Say hi to her when you can, smile and move on.

I don't think i'm "ignoring" her in an AFC way...when we make eye contact i smile and say "hi". I'm just not going out of my way to talk to her or engage in lengthy convo with her as i did before. i thought that was okay...no?

 

[Befuddled]

Big pappy,
when i said that about the friendzone. i didnt necessarily mean it as a bad thing. if all you want is to be friends, then by all means, go for it. but in this situation, it's clear that friendship wasnt the motive.
Friends are good. but when you have 'feeling' for a member of the opposite sex.... get the relationship and then the friendship. thats just my opinion.

 

[NewMan]

Here are my thoughts:-

Guys hit on this chick all the time, so i figure being a HB9, I'll take away the attention i've been giving her and let her come to me. That way if she liked me at all, i'd be able to sense it and she'll be the one doing the chasing.

She's NOT going to come to you unless you have shown interest in here. Sure you hang out with here - but what have you done to differentiate yourself from being in the friend zone? Get her out dancing alone - tease her, play with her, flirt, touch, kiss the chick for Fvck sake.

After a few days, she noticed immediatly that we hadn't talked in a while and approached me on it. I remained freindly but aloof.

There you go. What with this ALOOF sh#t? Sure, be a challenge, but that doesn't mean you ignore the chick. Your a challenge - play hard to get, don't ignore her. If someone ignored you, would you think that was a "Come and get it" sign?

In class the same day, this AMOG in class who she has never spoken to asks her out...and she accepted...

Yeah, not surprised, he had the balls to ask her out. You figure she'd say know since you were showing so much interest in her?

I called her up on Sunday to see if we were going to get together to rehearse her song for the show, but only got her answering machine...i didn't leave a message and i'm sure she has call display. She never called back.

Are you for real? you THOUGHT she had call waiting? Don't think, KNOW. If you don't leave a message, you call her back. But you didn't call her back because you THOUGHT she'd know it was you.... CALL HER BACK.

I figured, okay...if she even liked me at all if i play the whole "aloof" thing, be friendly, but not go out of my way to talk to her then she'll approach...

There's this aloof thing again. Dude you talk to the girl. Don't you think she will think something is wrong if you've suddenly been friendly and now are not being the same as you were? She's going to think - What the fvck has happened with this guy?

I don't even think she cared. It's been a week since the party and she hasn't said a word. I'm not voiding her or anything, we'll say "hi" if i pass her or if she approaches, but i'm playing the whole, "aloof" thing.

Yeah, again with the aloof. She has not said a word, because she already asked you, and you didn't call her or leave a message or call her back. And now your aloof, and she's wondering what the fvck happened? Some other guy has shown hwe interest and she's dating him - yeah, she's going to date.,,,

I guess because of this whole "rejection" feeling

I don't see how you were rejected, since you never asked her out in the first place.


Am I being harsh? I hope not, but from what I read, it seems like you did this all wrong.

Asta.

 

[ultra dj]

Originally posted by NewMan

She's NOT going to come to you unless you have shown interest in here. Sure you hang out with here - but what have you done to differentiate yourself from being in the friend zone? Get her out dancing alone - tease her, play with her, flirt, touch, kiss the chick for Fvck sake.

you're right on that whole "differentiate" thing. yes there was a LOT of kino, flirting, and teasing going on. I DIDN'T ask her out because she is STILL IN LOVE WITH HER BF!!!!! THEY ONLY BROKE UP 3 WEEKS AGO AND THEY STILL LOVE EACH OTHER!!!!! YES, THEY DID AGREE THAT THEY COULD SEE OTHER PEOPLE WHILE HE'S GONE, BUT SHE TALKS TO HIM EVERY DAY ON THE PHONE!!!!! THE ONLY REASON THEY BROKE UP IS BECAUSE HE HAD TO GO WORK A JOB OVERSEAS FOR 18 MONTHS!!!!! HENCE THE HESITATION IN ASKING HER OUT AND PURSUING THINGS FURTHER!!!!!!

That's the one detail i left out in the original post...that's why i hesitated...

Originally posted by NewMan

There you go. What with this ALOOF sh#t? Sure, be a challenge, but that doesn't mean you ignore the chick. Your a challenge - play hard to get, don't ignore her. If someone ignored you, would you think that was a "Come and get it" sign?

I'm not ignoring her...

Originally posted by NewMan

Yeah, not surprised, he had the balls to ask her out. You figure she'd say know since you were showing so much interest in her?

See above comment

Originally posted by NewMan

Are you for real? you THOUGHT she had call waiting? Don't think, KNOW. If you don't leave a message, you call her back. But you didn't call her back because you THOUGHT she'd know it was you.... CALL HER BACK.

Well i called her cell phone and i KNOW she has call waiting...

Originally posted by NewMan

There's this aloof thing again. Dude you talk to the girl. Don't you think she will think something is wrong if you've suddenly been friendly and now are not being the same as you were? She's going to think - What the fvck has happened with this guy?

She has not said a word, because she already asked you, and you didn't call her or leave a message or call her back. And now your aloof, and she's wondering what the fvck happened? Some other guy has shown hwe interest and she's dating him - yeah, she's going to date.,,,

When she asked me, i told her we'd have to get together and practice so i can figure out the chords. She said we'd be able to at the party (it was at her place). I mentioned it then, but she didn't seem interested anymore. I called her the next day to make sure, on her cell phone that has call display, and she did not return my call.

Originally posted by NewMan

Am I being harsh? I hope not, but from what I read, it seems like you did this all wrong.

yeah, you're being harsh...truthful...but harsh...of course i did this all wrong...why the hell do you think i'm so pi$$ed off and upset at myself.

The ONLY thing that stopped me from asking her out was the fact that her and her BF talk EVERY DAY!!!! AND THEY ARE IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER!!! THEY ONLY BROKE UP FOR CONVENIENCE AND HE IS VISITING AT CHRISTMAS!!!!

So yeah...i'm pissed off...I guess i should have mentioned that detail...

 

[iqqi]

Originally posted by ultra dj
HENCE THE HESITATION IN ASKING HER OUT AND PURSUING THINGS FURTHER!!!!!!

That's the one detail i left out in the original post...that's why i hesitated...

hesitate no longer my friend.

what you are doing right now is being frustrated, and you sound like a chump. stop being average! (hahaha, i crack myself up). anyways, starting when you read this you are going to have a whole new way of seeing it therefor dealing with it. instead of being mad that the other dude "beat you to the finish line", you are going to dance. that's right, my dear AFC friend (don't get mad, you are being AFC). dance.

newman was right. you have NOT been rejected. that is the 1st thing you are going to understand. so release that feeling, that frustration. repeat with me "i have not been rejected".

now. what are you left with? you and chic have attraction between you. there are chemicals between you (gavin rossdale is so hot i'd like to have _____ between us...oh, sorry...).

there are chemicals between you. this is what you are going to play on. if you want an example of what i am about to explain to you, check out my situation, it is similar, but with one difference. i am reveling in this "frustration". it is like when you can smell something so delicious and tantalizing in the kitchen cooking, and you are starving RIGHT NOW, oh it is painful that feeling but it is gooood to revel in it. when that sh!t is ready, it is going to be THE BEST fcuking meal you have ever had, you will savor each morsel you may even dream about that sh!t later.

are you following me? you are going to flirt with her, but turn up the c+f. and this is the most important part. you are going to stay detached through all of it. like "yeah, i want you. but i know you want me more, so come to me when you're ready." type attitude. so what if other dude is there now. who cares? not you. because he is not going to have her the way YOU will. he is easy. easy come easy go. where is the fun in that? you my friend, are going to have fun.
1. desire = good
2. challenge = good
3. competiton = good (you have to know that he can only make you look better
4. games = good (at this stage)
5. frustration = bad
6. attachment (to her, or the goal of getting her, or to desire) = bad

she is from now on, simmering on your back burner. the other dude? he is just a distraction to keep her from burning.

enjoy the dance my friend. lead her in circles, play with her, frustrate HER, confuse her, tantalize her, master her, and then devour her.

homework assignment. read #8 first, especially about c=f. go find some of george gordon's posts too, and learn from his sexy ass detachment.

 

[Tantric]

I dunno man, i've been in a very similar situation recently and part of me says STAY AWAY!! Not because she's into this other guy, but because of how you feel right now. besides, she's got a BF who she loves!! i personally wouldn't want to be her #2...but who knows...if you;re gonna play it, keep ALL YOUR FEELINGS neutral...just have fun, but i'd look at other girls.

 

[ultra dj]

interesting view...

yeah, i've been MAJORLY AFC...

I read that "homework assignment" and also you post as well. Your right...I'm not "revelling" in it. I used to have fun playing around, flirting, ****y, etc....but not with this one. Because of the way i am "thinking".

For some reason, because of the way im acting/reacting, i think i've pulled back the c/f too far, and that it will be awkward to get back into it...do you think she even noticed?...hmmm...yeah probably...oh well...you don't think going from c/f to NOTHING, then to REALLY being c/f is going to look wierd?

ah well..who cares...

I won't see her again until Tuesday so it will give me a couple of days to kick back a bit and get my head sraight.

For some dumb reason, i felt complelled to call her today. She wasn't there, so i just left a msg. with her brother...that was probably bad too as all my thought right now are AFC, but whatever, what's done is done.

What's stupid is that there is another HB9 and a HB7 interested in me and i could EASILY get eiher of them, but this chick has got me all wrapped up. The same "excitement" and interest just isn't there that i have for this other girl...part of me feels that once i start macking/fvcking these other girls, then this chick would think that i couldn't have "really" like her...i dunno...that dumb?

Originally posted by iqqi
hesitate no longer my friend.

enjoy the dance my friend. lead her in circles, play with her, frustrate HER, confuse her, tantalize her, master her, and then devour her.

hmmm....

Thanks.

 

[ultra dj]

P.S.

She ended up calling me back...

i kept the convo short, but basically told her that i liked her performance at the talent night, and was sorry that i couldn;t stick around.

She thanked me, said i was good as well, and then there was a bit of a silence. It felt like she was exoecting me to say something else...i followed up with some fluff talk and then told her i was on the way out the door, but i would see her again on Tuesday...

The convo was obviously longer than what i just posted, but that was the general gist.

it may have been a dumb move, but I think it;ll make it easier on tuesday when i see her to get back into "enjoying" the c/f, and having fun with her.

 

[iqqi]

Originally posted by ultra dj
oh well...you don't think going from c/f to NOTHING, then to REALLY being c/f is going to look wierd?

Originally posted by iqqimus the great
lead her in circles, play with her, frustrate HER, confuse her, tantalize her, master her, and then devour her.

i sense your wary ways my friend. you are unsure. banish it! banish that uncertainty!

"i bet you think this song is about you!" see you think that if you resume the c+f that she will notice the NOTHING more, and know it was about her. it wasn't about her! ("but" you say, "it was about her...") SHHHHH! no it wasn't dammit. prove it. your cousins dog got hit by a car and you were down about it. it wasn't about her! you aren't even thinking about it anymore anyways.

and when i say turn the c+f up, if you remember from your homework,

(owed to SR Fingers) Remember your detachment ... remain unfazed no matter what! Handle each interaction without getting attached to the outcome, good or bad. Always keep in mind that this girl is one of BILLIONS and put this sh!t in perspective.
NOTE: This is an awful lot of material and I would never run this much C&F on any girl. Just helping you get the mindset and providing options for when you see these little opportunities arise.

too much c+f is not what i am preaching. the point, the direction i am pointing you in is to be charming and witty and detached. that all equals sexy. you already have her attraction for you. you just have to know what to do with it.

dance, dance away!

 

[ToughGuy]

Hey Buddy!!

Don't you think that you are investing (infact wasting) too much too much time on this useless gal.

Find some other gals and go out on the dates with them. If she is worth and interested she would fight to save you from those *****es
Peace out.

Yours
Tuffy