How do you deal with a change in venue

[Konada]

Originally had a date with a girl from tinder, she texted me last minute for a change in venue.

Her: Hey can you meet me later at the east side instead?

Me: Hmm did something come up?

Her: I have a meeting with a friend that is ending later than expected, so if its convenient for you we can meet there instead? (Sounds like a fcking BS excuse)

Me: Where's the place you have in mind

Her: xxx

Me: That's way out of the way for me. Tell you what, we can do this another day or meet at <original venue> at a later time. Let me know what sounds better for you

Her: Hmm can you do tmr? I'm free until 11pm

Me: Can't I have plans all weekend

Her: Hm next week then?

Me: Kk

How would you guys have played this out?

 

[BetterCallSaul]

I think you handled this fine, but a couple of questions.

Is this the first time you're seeing this girl? As in literally you've never met in person before? If so, this is to be expected. If you've been out several times before, well, now you know where you rank with her.

 

[Konada]

I think you handled this fine, but a couple of questions.

Is this the first time you're seeing this girl? As in literally you've never met in person before? If so, this is to be expected. If you've been out several times before, well, now you know where you rank with her.

First time seeing the girl. I think what really made me take a stand to not go along was
1. BS excuse
2. Offered me a pity date that ends at 11pm

I definitely prefer doing it at the original venue since I've already done a few dates beforehand and pretty confident about that environment. The less variables in play the more I can focus on building my social acumen.

 

[guru1000]

No rapport, no obligation. The girl hasn't met you yet, so an unwavering worship upon your manhood is not to be expected--yet. She doesn't know who YOU are because if she did she would drive to your house, knock on your door on her knees, and fvck you all night, right?

At this point, you are just a virtual image, an idea of sorts. If her suggested place wasn't far, I would have agreed, and aggressively and shamelessly tried to bang her in person.

 

[logicallefty]

Handled well. Make sure you let her initiate the next plans, or at least initiate convo with you.

And you did good by not taking the pitty date. That sets a bad precedence when you are willing to be the opening act for her other show afterward.

 

[bigneil]

What time was the date starting? The first date should be short anyhow. 11pm is not unreasonable for a first date curfew, nor is her asking you to drive. She was offering a rain check. This is normal girl behavior for a first date. It didn't hurt to cancel though because she went for the bait and it sets the hook. Now you might as well wait until she initiates.

 

[Konada]

No rapport, no obligation. The girl hasn't met you yet, so an unwavering worship upon your manhood is not to be expected--yet. She doesn't know who YOU are because if she did she would drive to your house, knock on your door on her knees, and fvck you all night, right?

At this point, you are just a virtual image, an idea of sorts. If her suggested place wasn't far, I would have agreed, and aggressively and shamelessly tried to bang her in person.

Yes I would have went along if the place wasn't far. The fact is it was inconvenient as hell for me, I would have to take an hour to get there.

My take is that any girl who d!cks you around like that even on a first date has already experienced a plethora of guys supplicating to them in every way possible and conforming ever so slightly to her demands automatically puts you in the same frame as her orbiters. I just feel it sets a bad precedence for the date and unnecessarily makes the game tougher for you than it really needs to be.

 

[guru1000]

Yes I would have went along if the place wasn't far. The fact is it was inconvenient as hell for me, I would have to take an hour to get there.

Should I have taken her up on the supposed pity date?

I would have said, "Great, let's meet at 10 p.m. at XYZ (a place a few blovks from your house)." Have one drink on the date, stand up, extend your hand, and say, "I have to get going, but before we go, I have to show you my view (or xyz), and then you have to get going. Come."

Time constraints work in your favor. I have banged at least one dozen women who had attempted to constrain date time pre-date, and the dates ended at my house until morning. Akin to a girl saying, "you are not getting any sex from me." LOL. That surely means you are. It's a game. Nothing more, nothing less.

Her: You're not kissing me.
You: OK, great. <Continue trying to kiss her.>

Her: I could only stay for a half-hour.
You. OK, great. <Take her to your house until morning>

Her: I don't have sex with guys I don't know.
You: OK, great. <Continue trying to bang her>

In the dating phase, women's words mean absolutely nothing. Just acknowledge, smile, and continue toward the bang.

 

[Konada]

I would have said, "Great, let's meet at 10 p.m. at XYZ (a place a few blovks from your house)." Have one drink on the date, stand up, extend your hand, and say, "I have to get going, but before we go, I have to show you my view (or xyz), and then you have to get going. Come."

Time constraints work in your favor. I have banged at least one dozen women who had attempted to constrain date time pre-date, and the dates ended at my house until morning. Akin to a girl saying, "you are not getting any sex from me." LOL. That surely means you are. It's a game. Nothing more, nothing less.

Her: You're not kissing me.
You: OK, great. <Continue trying to kiss her.>

Her: I could only stay for a half-hour.
You. OK, great. <Take her to your house until morning>

Her: I don't have sex with guys I don't know.
You: OK, great. <Continue trying to bang her>

In the dating phase, women's words mean absolutely nothing. Just acknowledge, smile, and continue toward the bang.

So should I backpedal and take her up on her counteroffer or wait till next week and hit her up?

 

[Dgwizdal]

Initiate plans for next week or this one may burn out. Have to strike while the irons hot with tinder chicks...

You handled it fine but keep the above in mind.

 

[guru1000]

So should I backpedal and take her up on her counteroffer or wait till next week and hit her up?

You already told her you are busy. Is she that important that you would adjust your schedule to accommodate her? Or, in the alternative, if your plans fell through, she gets the second place spot? This is what she will be thinking.Not impossible to turn around, but less likely.

Leave till next week, and ask for the date.

 

[Mr Wright]

Her: You're not kissing me.
You: OK, great. <Continue trying to kiss her.>

Her: I could only stay for a half-hour.
You. OK, great. <Take her to your house until morning>

Her: I don't have sex with guys I don't know.
You: OK, great. <Continue trying to bang her>

In the dating phase, women's words mean absolutely nothing. Just acknowledge, smile, and continue toward the bang.

Quoted For Truth.

I translate these kind of things as "are you man enough to take what you want?"...and yes I am.

Once it's at this stage. I know she wants me. She knows I want her. She would rather fück me than make it work on time. She would rather have sex with me, a guy whose name she doesn't even know because I make her wet, rather than a guy she's known for years who does nothing for her. Both of these things happened to me last weekend. Objections are the question, are you man enough? And boy do they reward you when they feel that masculine energy and there's that male-female polarity that nature intended. That occurs when a woman has been properly seduced.

 

[LiveYourDream]

I translate these kind of things as "are you man enough to take what you want?"...and yes I am.

And boy do they reward you when they feel that masculine energy and there's that male-female polarity that nature intended. That occurs when a woman has been properly seduced.

Men who get this ^^^^ are men who know women.

 

[Konada]

I set up a date for today 2 days ago. She has been initiating alot of texts and me just replying until I just stopped after she said nothing of substance.

Today I text her -
Me: Hey, was busy yesterday. I'll see you tonight

Her: Hey sorry something urgent cropped up so I can't meet you today. I'll text you when i'm free?

Me: Np

Honestly I'm getting pretty sick of all these flakes and I don't even see the point where I should even be putting effort into these interactions. Fvcking women.

 

[guru1000]

Most draw a line in the sand, which merits a NEXT.

As time is the most precious commodity, flaking is a disqualifier for me if a double header wasn't scheduled. However, every situation is unique, and I try to be fluid as unforeseen opportunities do arise, so there are exceptions.

I once had a flake on the first date (probably based on my unwillingness to engage in convo or rapport building), who called me two weeks later and came straight to my house. I dated the girl for six months. Exceptions do occur, but 90% of flakes lead nowhere.