How do you avoid hesitating at that crucial moment?

[Jay26]

"Many people like to talk, few are up for the moment"

Okay I borrowed that from XXX, but it kind of applies here I think. I'm trying to adopt the DJ philosophy of just trying to pick up chicks anywhere but well the practice is harder than the theory!

The scenario, you're at a club, the mall, wherever... You see a HB, you make eye contact, she smiles, what next? You have to make a move, but of course, you're feet turn to lead, you just can't seem to do it, what tricks do people use to break through this?

I mean you can read stuff on this bored, get inspired, say 'yep next time I'm just gonna bloody well do it' but when you find yourself out there, at that moment, all you're enlightment suddenly deserts you and it's like 'oh fark, she's gonna cut my balls off'.

You know you're being irrational, and you should just do it cos what's to lose right? but you hesitate and of course get to tell yourself what a pu$$y you were as the moment is gone, then swear next time it'll be different and you do the same darn thing!

So I was just wondering how people overcome the fear at that moment. If I blow another opportunity with a HB like that I'm gonna freak out. Any tricks the master got to shut that voice in your head?

Sigh, I've come to the sad realisation I have no balls, respect to all the Dj's that can do this!

 

[BruticusMaximus]

I've only done it a handful of times, and I think I did it by switching off my brain and making my legs start walking. Once you're over there it's sink or swim.

I have sunk, and found it pretty easy to put it behind me. Despite that it still hasn't gotten any easier to approach. I thought after a few times it would be no big deal, but it still is.

 

[Don Rageta]

My apartment building has a pool and that has really helped me with hesitation. like BruticusMaximus said 'sink or swim'.

personally i use the same technique for jumping in the pool.

its a hot day and the pool is cold. you don't p*ssy foot around and step into the pool slowly. you grab your nuts and cannonball in. its cold at first but it warms up quickly. its the F**k it attitude. that is what i think of before an approach and it gets easier every time.

 

[Createthemindset]

I don't think there's a secret to it - i know what you mean though - its happened to me more times then i can count. I have also gone up to girls a few times and have got on the whole posistive responses - i find its easier to go with a friend(s) whom are also up for it and put peer pressure on each other - but - make it into a game - thats essentially what this is anyway if u think about it but somewhere along the line some of us got all to serious

 

[stallion]

I think Jay is looking for some small tricks that can help us put some rein to our minds at that crucial moment.

For me, I found this from shifting thru the bible and found it to be pretty effective for me at least.

What I do is I recite this short phrase in my mind when I see a girl I like to approach with is

"Like men, women also eat, sleep and crap."

Thats it, for some reason, it helps me calm down, and crack up a little. Actually, laughing really helps you calm down and be confident. I also envision a phrase from some movie star or somebody who I see as a role guy model and that puts me in the mack mood.

Try it and see how it works for you.

 

[Microphone Fiend]

Yea, it happens to everyone, amybe you just need some friends there to say postive things to you like "Do it, you WIMP," lol

If you are by yourself than just start walking and in your mind your brain will be like "WTF are you doing" and your feet will just kep walking.

This is using the 3's rule

 

[DonJohn83]

Picture her taking a sh!t and wiping her a55 with cheap no-name toilet paper.

Shes a friggin human just like you. She farts, she burps, she looks like sh!t when she wakes up in the morning.

If that doesn't work, then think back to times when you were approached by a chick. I usually think to myself "wow, she's got balls to just come up and talk/grab my hand like that" (clubbing scenario). Even if she was ugly, i still appreciated the attention.

ANYONE would. Will she think less of you? NO WAY.

So just approach, she'll appreciate the attention and you'll sleep better at night knowing you didnt wimp out.

I did this and got the 'no, sorry' line, i just said "No probs, have a good night". It felt good. Even getting shot down makes you feel that much bigger for trying.

Its only as hard as you think it is.

DonJohn83