How do you act disinterested?

[Confused]

I have been picking up a few girls these days and I number close, they dont answer when I call, so I text a couple days later, no response.

I'm on college campus at quite a small university so I'm more likely to bump into them then just applying NC. I seem to fail when it comes to showing disinterest and acting indifferent, I always seem to end up looking angry.

For instance, I walked into a cafe and I was a bit stressed so had an angry look on my face, I saw the girl who didn't answer my call she looked up I said hi but with an angry look on my face and walked past quickly no chit chat. See to her that would make her think she affected me when actually I was just stressed at trying to find a seat. How exactly are you suppose to behave? Should you stop for small talk for 30secs then leave?

 

[fearless_surrender]

start yawning..falling asleep... say things like "i'm bored".. if you don't chit chat her don't expect her to go up to you to chit chat unless you're doing your own thing and showing really positive vibes.

 

[horaholic]

How do you not see the answer in your question?

 

[Igetit!]

For instance, I walked into a cafe and I was a bit stressed so had an angry look on my face, I saw the girl who didn't answer my call she looked up I said hi but with an angry look on my face and walked past quickly no chit chat.

I don't see why you'd want her to think you're no longer interested.

You think that'll make her start to chase you or something?


If you just recently got her number,then more than likely,she's not emotionally invested in you enough to make that happen.



I would have negged her.


When you walked in the cafe and saw her,instead of saying hi then moving on,I would have started a little chat with her,and tossed a neg in there.




I would have started a conversation with her,then somewhere in the convo I would have threw out something like this...


you:Hey,where did you get that shirt/blouse from?

her: (wherever)

you: I like it,but you might want to run the iron over it a few times before you decide to wear it out again though. Oh yeah...

What happened the other day? I gave you a call,but I couldn't get ahold of you. I guess I must have missed you.



That's what I would have done.


That way you could ask about what happened when you tried to call her,while not coming off as needy.


She'd be too thrown off and destracted by the neg to think you were being needy or clingy about asking about the phonecall.



The trick is this through...

You have to say it ALL TOGETHER,in one big run-on sentence.


Have the neg and the question about the phonecall all in ONE SENTENCE,and say the whole thing WITHOUT pausing and giving her a chance to reply until you finish.


Forget about trying to act disinterested to make her come to you...at least for now.


You can show your interest,just be a man about it.


And have a confident,upbeat tone when you say this to her.


Just my two cents man.

 

[Confused]

I don't see why you'd want her to think you're no longer interested.

You think that'll make her start to chase you or something?


If you just recently got her number,then more than likely,she's not emotionally invested in you enough to make that happen.



I would have negged her.


When you walked in the cafe and saw her,instead of saying hi then moving on,I would have started a little chat with her,and tossed a neg in there.




I would have started a conversation with her,then somewhere in the convo I would have threw out something like this...


you:Hey,where did you get that shirt/blouse from?

her: (wherever)

you: I like it,but you might want to run the iron over it a few times before you decide to wear it out again though. Oh yeah...

What happened the other day? I gave you a call,but I couldn't get ahold of you. I guess I must have missed you.



That's what I would have done.


That way you could ask about what happened when you tried to call her,while not coming off as needy.


She'd be too thrown off and destracted by the neg to think you were being needy or clingy about asking about the phonecall.



The trick is this through...

You have to say it ALL TOGETHER,in one big run-on sentence.


Have the neg and the question about the phonecall all in ONE SENTENCE,and say the whole thing WITHOUT pausing and giving her a chance to reply until you finish.


Forget about trying to act disinterested to make her come to you...at least for now.


You can show your interest,just be a man about it.


And have a confident,upbeat tone when you say this to her.


Just my two cents man.

That makes sense. What if she gives me some flakey answer? i.e. 'oh i was busy.. hehe'

Also sorry, this incident was 2 different girls. 1 flaked on me cos it was too 'cold' and she didn't have enough sleep the night before.

the other just didn't return my call or reply to my text.

 

[Joe Stud]

if you KNEW you had an angry look on your face, why didnt you make adjustments... smile? smiling is a good habit to get into. you can smile (politely), and still come off relatively disinterested, but still mysterious

 

[Igetit!]

That makes sense. What if she gives me some flakey answer? i.e. 'oh i was busy.. hehe'

If she gives you a flimsy excuse,even though you may suspect it's not true,just play like you accept it as truth.


Be like,"Oh,ok."

Then I'd try to suggest a time for you two to get together.


DON'T ASK HER what days she has off or when she's free.


TELL HER when you're free.


Be like,"Well look,I have to work (this day or that day),but I be free on (whatever day) after 5 o'clock,so I WANT to see you.


Yes,say "I WANT TO SEE YOU".

That's not being needy,that a MAN telling a woman what he wants.


Neediness is you calling her 5 times a day,repeatedly trying to see her after not getting her hints to leave her alone,etc.


Yes. Say,"I WANT to see you",in the context I described.

Also sorry, this incident was 2 different girls. 1 flaked on me cos it was too 'cold' and she didn't have enough sleep the night before.

Too cold? Not enough sleep? Wow.

They could at least put a little more creativity into their lies,geez.

the other just didn't return my call or reply to my text.

Well if this happens repeatedly,then you might want to examine what it is you're doing or saying in your interaction with these girls.


Usually when girls flake,it's because there isn't enough comfort.


You may be going for the number too fast instead of talking a bit longer with them.


Edit:Yeah,I agree with Joe Stud.

All the advice you've received so far in this thread will be useless if you're walking around with a scowl on your face.

 

[fearless_surrender]

i have no idea what comfort is or how to build it without the whole kissing thing. i wish i could find some slick things to make a girl more comfortable but all i remember is childhood experiences from reading mystery method. *sigh* i know there is shared commonalities. i've even used comfort building questions like "what did you want to be when you were 5 years old?" something like that... she said i was good at making her comfortable after that so i guess that worked. but i don't know any other material on the fly. it stumps me out.

 

[Confused]

If she gives you a flimsy excuse,even though you may suspect it's not true,just play like you accept it as truth.


Be like,"Oh,ok."

Then I'd try to suggest a time for you two to get together.


DON'T ASK HER what days she has off or when she's free.


TELL HER when you're free.


Be like,"Well look,I have to work (this day or that day),but I be free on (whatever day) after 5 o'clock,so I WANT to see you.


Yes,say "I WANT TO SEE YOU".

That's not being needy,that a MAN telling a woman what he wants.


Neediness is you calling her 5 times a day,repeatedly trying to see her after not getting her hints to leave her alone,etc.


Yes. Say,"I WANT to see you",in the context I described.



Too cold? Not enough sleep? Wow.

They could at least put a little more creativity into their lies,geez.


Well if this happens repeatedly,then you might want to examine what it is you're doing or saying in your interaction with these girls.


Usually when girls flake,it's because there isn't enough comfort.


You may be going for the number too fast instead of talking a bit longer with them.


Edit:Yeah,I agree with Joe Stud.

All the advice you've received so far in this thread will be useless if you're walking around with a scowl on your face.

Yeah I need to learn to smile more. Good advice.

However, if she didn't pick up/return my call nor returned my text about meeting up do I still follow the above?

But change it slightly for the fact she didn't return my text rather than the return of call.

I think i'm going into the not interested disinterested routine too quickly after they flake rather than realising i didn't build enough comfort..

The excuse that flake gave just showed me she was a spoilt girl and potential atention wh0re, granted it was like -4C outside and she didn't get much sleep the last night but that's just BS when the day before when i saw her she looked really excited to me the next day when I said 'see u tomorrow' obviously feelings change with a lack of sleep.. go figure.

Should I still follow the above for someone who flaked out like that?

I texted her back saying 'I guess you won't get to meet me then. My time is precious at the moment I need to reserve it for people who respect it. See u around '

I've seen her twice since then but I had a scowl on my face (not cos of her, I was just in a bad mood) and didn't see her before she saw me so she'd assume she affected me when really I don't care and would just bang her if the opportunity arose for me to trick her into bed or something.

 

[Igetit!]

However, if she didn't pick up/return my call nor returned my text about meeting up do I still follow the above?

YES.

If you get a girl's number,call her or text her trying to set up a date,don't hear anything back from her,then run into her again out in public somewhere,YES,go ahead and follow what was suggested above.



Remember F283000's Two Strikes Rule.

Use it.

But change it slightly for the fact she didn't return my text rather than the return of call.

Correct.

I think i'm going into the not interested disinterested routine too quickly after they flake rather than realising i didn't build enough comfort..

It's possible.

I'd just continue showing interest in a MASCULINE WAY up until you "sense" that it's starting to drag on,or you think she may not be interested.



Once that happens,then you can try the "not interested" tactic if you want.

The excuse that flake gave just showed me she was a spoilt girl and potential atention wh0re, granted it was like -4C outside and she didn't get much sleep the last night but that's just BS when the day before when i saw her she looked really excited to me the next day when I said 'see u tomorrow' obviously feelings change with a lack of sleep.. go figure.

Should I still follow the above for someone who flaked out like that?

Woah,woah....-4 degrees outside???

Where the heck do you live? :crackup:



To me,that sounds like a legit reason to flake,but I think she was just probably using it because it was handy.



If she were really interested,she would have suggested another time instead of just saying it was too cold,then leaving it at that.



But that doesn't matter.



Yeah,follow the same instructions for girls who flake like that as well.


You say she might be somewhat of an attention wh*re.


That might be true,but even if it is,that means that somewhere in your interactions with her,YOU DID SOMETHING that "activated" that part of her,and caused her to go AW on you.



I know that's true. You know why?


Because if she were an attention wh*re,if she were really one 100% throughout,then NO GUY would be able to date her.



She's be a virgin,and would never,ever have had a boyfriend.



If she's an AW,then she's an AW.



But she's not.



The same girl who's an AW to you can turn right around and sleep with the next guy who approaches her on the same day he met her.



If she's an AW,then YOU brought it out of her.



I don't want to go into what (if anything) you did to cause this,but if you just follow what I said,and ESPECIALLY the part about saying,"I WANT to see you" to a girl,(and say it with authority),that'll cancel out her "AWness" and stir up attraction in her.



I take it you coming straight out and tell a girl you want to see her is something you've never done.



Try it. You'd be surprised at the results...but do it in context.



Don't run around approaching random women saying that. That is being needy.



I mean AFTER you've gotten the number,called her to make plans to get together,and she appears to be flakey.



But I think if you just use a little more comfort during the approach,they'll probably start to flake less on you.