How do I save my life?

[Dan Bautista]

Have wasted the last 6 months of my life doing nothing at all except browsing the internet with no purpose at all. I've tried and really want to change my life around but there's nothing that keeps me going. I've read so many articles, posts, etc. and I can't seem to get a grip on my life. I'll usually plan on being productive for a day but eventually end up falling back in the trap of wasting time doing something that's not productive at all, not just surfing the internet. A few academic decisions I made in my life, such as not pursuing the course I wanted to because others told me not to, have also been demotivating and though I think I've moved on, I occasionally think back of those times and feel sad. I used to think about suicide at one point in my life but I know in my mind that I'm too weak to even off myself. How can I turn my life around? I turn 16 tomorrow, by the way.

EDIT: At the beginning of the year, I had made pages of goals to achieve after deriving the concept from the book "Eat That Frog" but eventually lost track of the goals as well as the papers. I reviewed the papers a month ago and realized that I didn't manage to obtain even a single goal I had listed on those papers. I guess I really am a loser.

I have nothing going on in my life. I come back every single day only to tick off a day on my calendar and mark how many more days of school I have left. I used to do this back in school and now I'm doing it in high school too.

 

[sazc]

you sound depressed, have you considered telling this to a licensed professional?

 

[Dan Bautista]

you sound depressed, have you considered telling this to a licensed professional?

Not really. Coming from a South-Asian country, going to a therapist is sort of a taboo subject.

 

[sazc]

Not really. Coming from a South-Asian country, going to a therapist is sort of a taboo subject.

well, maybe you should break that socially imposed boundary...?

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

I had made pages of goals to achieve after deriving the concept

There's your problem dude. Choose ONE goal. One easy, small goal. Setting and achieving goals is a skill, and like any other skill you have to START SLOW. You need to slowly build up to where you are doing goal oriented behavior for hours a day. Start simple, like exercising for 20 minutes a day. Once you do that for a month, choose something else to do for 20 minutes a day. Give yourself time.

 

[FairShake]

Find something physical and do it. Personally I ride my bike a lot and play some disc golf. Or just take long walks.
Eat more green things.
Try to create something. Write a poem, take some photos, cook a fantastic meal.
Get closer to your family and friends. Or make new friends, or even a new family.
And see a fvcking therapist. They're smarter than anyone on SoSuave.

 

[Urbanyst]

Not really. Coming from a South-Asian country, going to a therapist is sort of a taboo subject.

Well whats more important? Your LIFE or a bunch of dumb social rules?

 

[ManlyMichael]

Look go easy on little bro over here, you need to really find the truth my friend, the truth is that you were made by Christ Jesus, God creator of all, go to him and he gives you things to do, stuff to get rid of from your life, ways of strength so that every woman will respect and desire you, there is many things for your hands to do my friend, you can easily be one of the most powerful and life changing people for others, it starts by admitting your on the wrong way of life, start rejecting these things which deep down inside you know are not good, fight against your desires to take the easy way out.

You are able to get over this feeling of being useless.

Here are some simple steps to get you started

1 Cut off all entertainment

Sounds harsh? It's not, your life will be entertaining enough, entertainment is a death trap. This is no exaggeration. It takes up your money and strength and gives 0, nothing, it's just like the flu or headache or whatever disease you can name, it just does nothing good for you. Many things are more entertaining than tv or movies or games or porn, giving away hundreds of dollars of your valuables is more entertaining than those above things. My friends who give stuff away come and tell me stories about the donations they made and the stories last for hours and hours, a whole day worth of conversation that never gets and old and leaves us all smiling (though I didn't even give anything, just hearing good stories is entertaining)

So then what do you do? Take a walk, read for no more than 1 hour a day, you will never even remember more than a small portion anyway, why read and study more? Find a way to produce income, garden, go to the forest and take an axe and a saw and cut a tree, camp outside, try fishing, swimming, many more things to do. You don't know them because your mind has not been use to movement, it's been use to the stillness of entertainment. It's a death trap, the dead are still, and so are those who won't reject entertainment. Work is GOOD!

2. Never let girls be part of your decision

Why do we say this?? Because number two and number one are the same, girls are the same as entertainment, if they are part of your decisions you will be a slave to sex, just like being a slave at a 9am-5pm to spend it all on entertainment and never move anywhere after years.(it's not wrong to work, just wrong to spend on entertainment and never become free) and it's so frustrating that people kill each other or themselves, don't think your any different, being a slave is very angry days, and being a slave to sex is even more angry than actual slavery, it's no exaggeration on that.

3. Forgive people for the mistakes

Your young little bro, your going to try to improve and fail a bunch of times, what is going to make you finally succeed? It's this third step. Christ Jesus says forgive and you will be forgiven. When you keep accusing others of doing wrong, you can't focus on fixing your wrong. When you forgive people of the wrong stuff they do, then you can focus on fixing yours and you will succeed for sure with no doubt.

Success and peace of mind to my little bro!

 

[KingofPuss]

Some people are getting so serious up in here.

Look, you're 16. I just got out of that period of my life. It gets better, keep being lazy while you can, because in a year or two reality is going to hit you. And you will have no choice but to bust your ass 50-60 hours a week at a physically demanding job, only to have $100-$200 a week to feed yourself, clothe yourself, gas your car, etc.

If you'd like to avoid living pay check to pay check like that, start looking up things that interest you, since youre always on the internet. Learn a thing or two, find your passion and pursue it. Inform yourself, go to school, and do your best to live out your dreams. Regret is missed opportunities my friend. Minimize the opportunities you turn down.

 

[bullgoose]

Find an active hobby, . Start boxing, practicing a martial art, running, whatever, let your frustrations fuel you.

 

[Serenity]

Ah, procrastination. I'm very familiar with that, it's something that's easy in theory but hard to practically break.

What I do is not to think about the things I should have done, instead I deprive myself of doing whatever I do when I procrastinate. I deny myself even turning on my computer, my TV stays off and I won't take up my phone unless there's someone I need to talk to. What usually happens is I sit in my living room in silence doing nothing. That leaves only my thoughts which won't stop reminding me of what I really should do. This very quickly drives me crazy and I start doing what I should do simply because it's better than nothing.

I have always found that the hardest part is to get going. Once I start my tasks I gain "momentum", meaning it gets easier the further I get and eventually get to a point where I don't feel like stopping. When I get to that last stage I'll even be looking for more productive things to do when one task is done. Basically I get a lot of things done once I start, usually more than I planned on doing.

First thing you have to do though is to deny yourself the options to procrastinate. If you can do that I can guarantee you'll get going, because doing anything is better than the extreme boredom of doing nothing.

Btw, you're way too young to consider suicide. A person can improve their life massively in just a year, but you have many decades to do it. Don't use all those decades on getting started, if you start today all those decades will be a lot better.

 

[Billtx49]

A few academic decisions I made in my life, such as not pursuing the course I wanted to because others told me not to, have also been demotivating

How can I turn my life around?

Realize that the only person with control of your life direction is you and act accordingly.
Will there be successes? Yes. Will there be failures? Yes, but both require some actions and decisions from you.