How can one strategically avoid a girl without coming off as a douche...?

harrison9876

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Hey guys...

A mega hot girl move into my area back in November. We run into each other every few days walking our dogs.

Even though I have her number...it turns out I misread her IL. I was basically trying to get to know a girl who had no interest at all...haha...WHOOPS!

Not a big deal, it happens.

I suspect being new in my area she was being friendly trying to meet people...and I just misread that as something else.

All good.

I tossed her number a couple weeks ago...and do not expect to ever hear from her.

But...

Because this was not some random girl I met at some club or whatever (rather, a girl who lives in my area)...

I still run into her.

I talk and engage with everyone in my area when I am out with my dog...but with her it is getting a bit weird.

It feels like she is purposefully trying to NOT engage, as to not lead me on...when all I am doing is treating her like everyone else, saying "hi" when I see them etc.

I actually walked right by her one day (within 5 feet), said, "hey...how's it going?" as I passed her...and she basically was silent and stared straight ahead...made no eye contact whatsoever.

It was WEIRD as fvck...AND even though I was just being friendly, I actually felt a bit embarrassed by it. Actually, I felt rejected first...then embarrassed.

It was like, "damn...this girl still thinks I am trying for her..."

I am not going to change the times I am out walking with my dog to avoid her...no way. My life and my schedule is mine.

BUT...

To avoid any further situations like this, I feel like the best course of action (and prevent any further embarrassment) is to NOT attempt to engage with this girl at ALL when I see her. Just continue on my walk, pretend I do not see her, etc...hell...maybe even change directions when I see her.

My only concern with that, is it "MAY" come across as me being hurt, or acting like a douche...

Anyone else been in an odd situation like this, or have any thoughts on this?
 

Bigpapa

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Hey guys...

A mega hot girl move into my area back in November. We run into each other every few days walking our dogs.

Even though I have her number...it turns out I misread her IL. I was basically trying to get to know a girl who had no interest at all...haha...WHOOPS!

Not a big deal, it happens.

I suspect being new in my area she was being friendly trying to meet people...and I just misread that as something else.

All good.

I tossed her number a couple weeks ago...and do not expect to ever hear from her.

But...

Because this was not some random girl I met at some club or whatever (rather, a girl who lives in my area)...

I still run into her.

I talk and engage with everyone in my area when I am out with my dog...but with her it is getting a bit weird.

It feels like she is purposefully trying to NOT engage, as to not lead me on...when all I am doing is treating her like everyone else, saying "hi" when I see them etc.

I actually walked right by her one day (within 5 feet), said, "hey...how's it going?" as I passed her...and she basically was silent and stared straight ahead...made no eye contact whatsoever.

It was WEIRD as fvck...AND even though I was just being friendly, I actually felt a bit embarrassed by it. Actually, I felt rejected first...then embarrassed.

It was like, "damn...this girl still thinks I am trying for her..."

I am not going to change the times I am out walking with my dog to avoid her...no way. My life and my schedule is mine.

BUT...

To avoid any further situations like this, I feel like the best course of action (and prevent any further embarrassment) is to NOT attempt to engage with this girl at ALL when I see her. Just continue on my walk, pretend I do not see her, etc...hell...maybe even change directions when I see her.

My only concern with that, is it "MAY" come across as me being hurt, or acting like a douche...

Anyone else been in an odd situation like this, or have any thoughts on this?
unless you were not a weird guy when you were trying to hook her , I would say that this is auto rejection from her end
 

IamtheAlphamale

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Hey guys...

A mega hot girl move into my area back in November. We run into each other every few days walking our dogs.

Even though I have her number...it turns out I misread her IL. I was basically trying to get to know a girl who had no interest at all...haha...WHOOPS!

Not a big deal, it happens.

I suspect being new in my area she was being friendly trying to meet people...and I just misread that as something else.

All good.

I tossed her number a couple weeks ago...and do not expect to ever hear from her.

But...

Because this was not some random girl I met at some club or whatever (rather, a girl who lives in my area)...

I still run into her.

I talk and engage with everyone in my area when I am out with my dog...but with her it is getting a bit weird.

It feels like she is purposefully trying to NOT engage, as to not lead me on...when all I am doing is treating her like everyone else, saying "hi" when I see them etc.

I actually walked right by her one day (within 5 feet), said, "hey...how's it going?" as I passed her...and she basically was silent and stared straight ahead...made no eye contact whatsoever.

It was WEIRD as fvck...AND even though I was just being friendly, I actually felt a bit embarrassed by it. Actually, I felt rejected first...then embarrassed.

It was like, "damn...this girl still thinks I am trying for her..."

I am not going to change the times I am out walking with my dog to avoid her...no way. My life and my schedule is mine.

BUT...

To avoid any further situations like this, I feel like the best course of action (and prevent any further embarrassment) is to NOT attempt to engage with this girl at ALL when I see her. Just continue on my walk, pretend I do not see her, etc...hell...maybe even change directions when I see her.

My only concern with that, is it "MAY" come across as me being hurt, or acting like a douche...

Anyone else been in an odd situation like this, or have any thoughts on this?
Use it as a chance to get used to rejection. Do the same thing every day. Smile and say hi. Embrace the pain and feel it. Getting rejected a lot can make you stronger. You will need to force your legs forward and your lips to move. This is a good thing.
 

2Rocky

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Just be your charming, gregarious self and don't inflict yourself on her. Greet her and move on. Only reengage her if she responds and let her move the interaction along if she desires. Acknowledge her presence but don't go out of your way to avoid her because you did nothing wrong (I assume).
 

harrison9876

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mmmmmm...well...I did eat her puppy....

;)

Nah, I did nothing wrong at all...but it almost feels like she is treating me like I DID do something wrong. I suspect that is just my bruised ego...
 

Robert28

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This girl sounds like someone I wouldn’t worry about anyways.
 

Slowhandluke

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Ultimately, the best course of action imho is to change your schedule for now. The "I am not going to change the times I am out walking with my dog to avoid her...no way. My life and my schedule is mine" attitude is not correct.

This is not like a job u are forced to go to, and are forced to see the same person because of that. Slowly, get back to the same schedule weeks or months from now and hope things start to get less awkward. If not, then just permanently have a new schedule.

You shot your shot, but there are always repercussions. When u do meet her in these soon to be rare instances, just be polite and nice. Perhaps just a simple smile and wave goodbye.

Besides, the best way of showing someone u don't care about them is to disappear for a while. By doing this u will prove to her u are not a stalker or at least, dont have stalker tendencies. Hahahahhaha
 

gabvfx

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Best to not give a fvck.. Greet her if you see her but if she doesnt greet you back you shouldn't care.

Girls will always think you are trying for them. Once they get the idea that you like them they will always think the same holds true for the rest of your life.

In my beta days, I have simped for a couple girls, to this day they still think I got a crush on them, when in reality I couldn't care less about them and its astonishing to me the way they act, thinking that they own me. It's hilarious at times.

I understand it feels bad when you greet someone and they dont greet you back, specially when its a girl that thinks you are trying to get with her, at first it pisses you off cause you start to think the girl is just full of herself, but like I said it's best not to give a fvck greet anyway, if she doesn't greet back that only shows the kind of person she is, you did everything right there is no need to feel embarassed.
 

RobbyDog

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This woman rejected you…WHY on earth do you care what she thinks/how you come across?
 

bat soup

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Hey guys...

A mega hot girl move into my area back in November. We run into each other every few days walking our dogs.

Even though I have her number...it turns out I misread her IL. I was basically trying to get to know a girl who had no interest at all...haha...WHOOPS!

Not a big deal, it happens.

I suspect being new in my area she was being friendly trying to meet people...and I just misread that as something else.

All good.

I tossed her number a couple weeks ago...and do not expect to ever hear from her.

But...

Because this was not some random girl I met at some club or whatever (rather, a girl who lives in my area)...

I still run into her.

I talk and engage with everyone in my area when I am out with my dog...but with her it is getting a bit weird.

It feels like she is purposefully trying to NOT engage, as to not lead me on...when all I am doing is treating her like everyone else, saying "hi" when I see them etc.

I actually walked right by her one day (within 5 feet), said, "hey...how's it going?" as I passed her...and she basically was silent and stared straight ahead...made no eye contact whatsoever.

It was WEIRD as fvck...AND even though I was just being friendly, I actually felt a bit embarrassed by it. Actually, I felt rejected first...then embarrassed.

It was like, "damn...this girl still thinks I am trying for her..."

I am not going to change the times I am out walking with my dog to avoid her...no way. My life and my schedule is mine.

BUT...

To avoid any further situations like this, I feel like the best course of action (and prevent any further embarrassment) is to NOT attempt to engage with this girl at ALL when I see her. Just continue on my walk, pretend I do not see her, etc...hell...maybe even change directions when I see her.

My only concern with that, is it "MAY" come across as me being hurt, or acting like a douche...

Anyone else been in an odd situation like this, or have any thoughts on this?
To me she sounds rude. I'd treat like her like I'd treat any other rude person - like they don't exist.
 

Create self-fulfilling prophecies. Always assume the positive. Assume she likes you. Assume she wants to talk to you. Assume she wants to go out with you. When you think positive, positive things happen.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

harrison9876

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Ah man. You did something very wrong. You approached a girl who you didn't know and let her know that you wanted her before discovering if she's interested in you/horny first. You did it back to front.

The better way is this - You approach women, introduce, talk and subtly flirt and see her reactions. If she's reacting then you escalate. If she doesn't react then you break away with plausible deniability and nobody feels awkward.
No no no. That is not what happened (not back to front)... :)

Just to give a weeee bit more detail here:

Met her on a walk...engaged her...tested the waters.

Saw her again a few times...engaged. Sometimes it was just quick convo...sometimes it was more in depth.

However...MOST times I see her (like 90% of the time), she on her phone with work, so it ends up just a casual "hi" or wave...or she does not respond at all.

On the times she is not on her phone (this is almost never), I approach, she is open, we chat.

This went on from Nov. to about Jan.

Things were feeling kinda cool, and when I ran into her over the holidays, it was some casual chat, I wished her a happy new year, hoped her and her dog were settling in, etc...and I gave her my number.

Normally I ask for a number, but as she lives in my area...it felt a bit safer. Y'know...single girl, new neighborhood, new people, guy she does not know engaging her, etc.

She texted me her number that night.

Thanked me for earlier, and said I was, "super sweet"...

She did not need to reply...nor did she have to give me her number. But...she did. So I assumed it was because she wanted me to have it.

I thought that "may" have opened up an opportunity for texting convo, but nada.

She did not really want to engage at all. I basically replied to her message with some C&F, and then she did not reply back.

Saw her on the street the next day (she was on her phone again, go figure), but the vibe was somewhat weird.

That being said, I have not given her ANY clues at all that I liked her...I was simply playing "the cool guy she met on walk". BUT...women are also not stupid.

As she did not seem to be into texting...and she has not initiated any communication this way via text...I figured I would just leave the communication to when I run into her.

I've run into her many times since...but as I mentioned, 90% of the time...she is on her phone. It simply becomes a casual "hi" or "wave"...but again...a weird vibe, that I cannot explain.

a few weeks later, I texted her to see what was up, it was a quick reply...but again...did not leave anything open for convo. It just really seemed like she did not want to engage again.

4 weeks ago, I ran into her when she was not on her phone. She saw me, to my surprise, she gave me a really cute wave. So I stopped, and we chatted.

Vibe was actually quite good, and we chatted for a while.

After that, I did not run into her for a month or so.

Trying to get to know her over these "random encounters" is awful. I'm like...damn I have this girls mumber...it would be sooooooooooo much easier to just hit her up.

So...about 2 weeks ago...for whatever silly reason that was in my head at the time...hahaha...I texted her to she how she was doing...she replied, said she was "barely alive!...hahaha" (probably referencing her work, as she is a maniac). I messaged her back, joked a bit, asking her what that was about...and go figure...she did not reply.

I saw her the next day...vibe was back to being weird.

Saw her a few times that week...and the last time I saw her was a few days ago when I walked right by her...smiled and said hi...and she flat out ignored it and kept walking.

As I mentioned...girls are not stupid. I am sure she has clued in by now that I am interested in her.

I therefore summarized:

1) She gave me her number as she was being a friendly neighbor.
2) She replied to my texts because she was being a friendly neighbor.
3) her hot/coldness is due to low IL.

That last time I saw her felt like, "dude...take a hint...not interested..."

Which is why started this thread to begin with...
 

Bigpapa

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No no no. That is not what happened (not back to front)... :)

Just to give a weeee bit more detail here:

Met her on a walk...engaged her...tested the waters.

Saw her again a few times...engaged. Sometimes it was just quick convo...sometimes it was more in depth.

However...MOST times I see her (like 90% of the time), she on her phone with work, so it ends up just a casual "hi" or wave...or she does not respond at all.

On the times she is not on her phone (this is almost never), I approach, she is open, we chat.

This went on from Nov. to about Jan.

Things were feeling kinda cool, and when I ran into her over the holidays, it was some casual chat, I wished her a happy new year, hoped her and her dog were settling in, etc...and I gave her my number.

Normally I ask for a number, but as she lives in my area...it felt a bit safer. Y'know...single girl, new neighborhood, new people, guy she does not know engaging her, etc.

She texted me her number that night.

Thanked me for earlier, and said I was, "super sweet"...

She did not need to reply...nor did she have to give me her number. But...she did. So I assumed it was because she wanted me to have it.

I thought that "may" have opened up an opportunity for texting convo, but nada.

She did not really want to engage at all. I basically replied to her message with some C&F, and then she did not reply back.

Saw her on the street the next day (she was on her phone again, go figure), but the vibe was somewhat weird.

That being said, I have not given her ANY clues at all that I liked her...I was simply playing "the cool guy she met on walk". BUT...women are also not stupid.

As she did not seem to be into texting...and she has not initiated any communication this way via text...I figured I would just leave the communication to when I run into her.

I've run into her many times since...but as I mentioned, 90% of the time...she is on her phone. It simply becomes a casual "hi" or "wave"...but again...a weird vibe, that I cannot explain.

a few weeks later, I texted her to see what was up, it was a quick reply...but again...did not leave anything open for convo. It just really seemed like she did not want to engage again.

4 weeks ago, I ran into her when she was not on her phone. She saw me, to my surprise, she gave me a really cute wave. So I stopped, and we chatted.

Vibe was actually quite good, and we chatted for a while.

After that, I did not run into her for a month or so.

Trying to get to know her over these "random encounters" is awful. I'm like...damn I have this girls mumber...it would be sooooooooooo much easier to just hit her up.

So...about 2 weeks ago...for whatever silly reason that was in my head at the time...hahaha...I texted her to she how she was doing...she replied, said she was "barely alive!...hahaha" (probably referencing her work, as she is a maniac). I messaged her back, joked a bit, asking her what that was about...and go figure...she did not reply.

I saw her the next day...vibe was back to being weird.

Saw her a few times that week...and the last time I saw her was a few days ago when I walked right by her...smiled and said hi...and she flat out ignored it and kept walking.

As I mentioned...girls are not stupid. I am sure she has clued in by now that I am interested in her.

I therefore summarized:

1) She gave me her number as she was being a friendly neighbor.
2) She replied to my texts because she was being a friendly neighbor.
3) her hot/coldness is due to low IL.

That last time I saw her felt like, "dude...take a hint...not interested..."

Which is why started this thread to begin with...
yeah , there was no interest , and most likely she is just weird

just act normal when you see her , and do not be butthurt about her acting weird , but next time when she wants to talk with you just brush it off with a smile on your face and continue walking

let her do the leg work
 

Slowhandluke

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No no no. That is not what happened (not back to front)... :)

Just to give a weeee bit more detail here:

Met her on a walk...engaged her...tested the waters.

blahhh... blahhh... blahhh....
She's playing you. Be the confident man and just stop interacting with her. IMHO, this is called a sh*t test. High value guys have better things to think about then girls playing games (or inadvertently playing games). Behind the scenes, there could be a myriad of reasons for her to be acting like this: she could be trying to get back with her boyfriend, her parents are dying, she works - but as an escort and her sugar daddy is thinking of upgrading her "status" to main whole.. or down grading her. Who knows? Who cares? She's just someone who you exchange pleasantries with right now. That is all. You tried to escalate, but she didn't reciprocate. She knows you are interested. It's her job to escalate before YOU get away... because you are thinking about and focusing on other important things, and because of this YOUR life is getting better and better and OTHER girls will "steal you away" if she thinks too long. Isn't that, right? hahahahhaa

Regardless of how hot she is, she's just a girl.. Don't get your panties in a twist.
 

Scaramouche

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Hi Harrison,
Yes you are overplaying this....The best you may hope for is to be "Friend Zoned"...Still what's the harm in just being a good bloke?...See her as you might see the pretty Girl behind the Bar at your club....Life is long you never know what can happen down the line.
 

harrison9876

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Hi Harrison,
Yes you are overplaying this....The best you may hope for is to be "Friend Zoned"....
Hey...

I actually have noooooooooo problem being "Friend Zoned". There are other girls out there...and she may have hot friends...haha...

I am just going to be aloof and not engage or say hi, etc. when I see her...unless she initiates first.
 

Konada

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I am just going to be aloof and not engage or say hi, etc. when I see her...unless she initiates first.
Ironically enough, if you do this, you are going to look butthurt than actually aloof. You are giving her preferential treatment because of the past history you guys have.

The best play is to continue to acknowledge her when you see her, but go about your way.

Better if you happen to meet some other neighbour along the way, and she can see that you're treating her like everyone else.
 

harrison9876

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Ironically enough, if you do this, you are going to look butthurt than actually aloof. You are giving her preferential treatment because of the past history you guys have.

The best play is to continue to acknowledge her when you see her, but go about your way.

Better if you happen to meet some other neighbour along the way, and she can see that you're treating her like everyone else.
Good point...

Actually...most people know me in the area, as I pretty much engage everyone I meet...so all good... :)
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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Hey guys...

A mega hot girl move into my area back in November. We run into each other every few days walking our dogs.

Even though I have her number...it turns out I misread her IL. I was basically trying to get to know a girl who had no interest at all...haha...WHOOPS!

Not a big deal, it happens.

I suspect being new in my area she was being friendly trying to meet people...and I just misread that as something else.

All good.

I tossed her number a couple weeks ago...and do not expect to ever hear from her.

But...

Because this was not some random girl I met at some club or whatever (rather, a girl who lives in my area)...

I still run into her.

I talk and engage with everyone in my area when I am out with my dog...but with her it is getting a bit weird.

It feels like she is purposefully trying to NOT engage, as to not lead me on...when all I am doing is treating her like everyone else, saying "hi" when I see them etc.

I actually walked right by her one day (within 5 feet), said, "hey...how's it going?" as I passed her...and she basically was silent and stared straight ahead...made no eye contact whatsoever.

It was WEIRD as fvck...AND even though I was just being friendly, I actually felt a bit embarrassed by it. Actually, I felt rejected first...then embarrassed.

It was like, "damn...this girl still thinks I am trying for her..."

I am not going to change the times I am out walking with my dog to avoid her...no way. My life and my schedule is mine.

BUT...

To avoid any further situations like this, I feel like the best course of action (and prevent any further embarrassment) is to NOT attempt to engage with this girl at ALL when I see her. Just continue on my walk, pretend I do not see her, etc...hell...maybe even change directions when I see her.

My only concern with that, is it "MAY" come across as me being hurt, or acting like a douche...

Anyone else been in an odd situation like this, or have any thoughts on this?
Don't half step. It's phaggotry.

Women don't hesitate to flake or ghost and be a ****. Put on the big boy pants and nut up.

You can't be half a gangster.
 
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