How can I make this NOT creepy?

[spax]

On Thursday night I met 3 gorgeous girls at a bar with a friend. We all had a great time, chatting, laughing and having a few drinks.

I was flirting with one of them who I think may have liked me.

Anyway, one of the other girls had a boyfriend so she was a bit reserved talking to my friend and I and eventually suggested that her friends leave the bar, despite the other 2 having a great time.

So they went off to leave and I must have had some sort of mental aneuryism as I failed to ask for the girls number who I liked. I just sat there like a chump and wished them well.

Anyway, I was able to find one of the other girls Facebook profiles (not the b*tchy one) through some detective work (searching her first name, and education). Unfortunately the one I liked mentioned that she does not have Facebook.

So, I was thinking...should I message her friend and say something like:

"Hey Jess,

It's Spax from the other night. I was wondering if you could send me your friend Amanda's phone number? I'd love to catch up with her some time.

Hope you guys didn't get too drunk for the rest of the night. ;-) "

Is that okay? Or is that creepy because she will be thinking "How the fuuuck did this dude find my Facebook profile??"

How can I pull this off without being a creep and what do you think of my message to her friend?

CLIFFS -

- Met 3 girls at a bar.
- Had a great time but failed to get number (yes, retard)
- Found one of them's Facebook profile through detective skills
- Thinking of sending her a message asking for her hottie friend's number for me.
- Concerned it might be creepy or will just crash and burn. Any better options?

 

[SHChamp]

I would let this one go. The fact of the matter is that you dropped the ball at the end of the night, it was your one job to ask for her number in order to show actual interest.

Trying to get her number through, what cannot be viewed other than FB-stalking, will come off as desperate and needy. In the end, by not doing this, you don't get the girl, but doing this regardless of what I mentioned will give a very bad impression.

Learn from this mistake and move on, don't dwell on her and don't go out of your way to move mountains to get this girl's number. She's not special, no matter what you felt after that night. It's harsh, but I'd rather give you brutal honesty than beat around the bush.

 

[EvilSpirit22]

See, The thing is that your attempt of actually asking her number through a friend on facebook would categorize you as a stalker and that is Creepy enough.

But, on the other side, You have nothing to lose. So instead of being affected by what people may think about you just do whatever you want to do.

What will happen? She'll think you are a creepy guy and would not give you her number or If they both liked you from that previous meeting she'll tell her friend about you and you might get her number.


So if you actually don't give a rat's ass about what other people would think about you then you should message this other girl.

And if she says no , well you lost nothing and learnt a new LESSON.

 

[Moroder]

Doing semi-covert cyber-research AND relaying your message by a 2nd person to her reeks of "I am desperate, indecisive and second-guessing myself, plus I'd rather use FB than talk". Not good. Let this one go. You'll do better next time because you won't let them walk w/o harvesting their number first. It's all practice, practice.

 

[Peña]

What have you got to lose? You dont ask you dont get it. If you ask she finds you creepy, Maybe not. Maybe you get laid. At least you try.

 

[salinechow]

Ok. NO possible way to un-creep this but we can lessen the blow.

Woman are emotional right, not logical as much. Let’s work with that. What would John Cusack do in a rom-com?
Maybe when you hit up Jess here is an idea to take the "I want to f^ck your friend so bad I used the internet to find you all" into something that makes them think you are sweet and are not going to turn them into human leather lampshades.

“I think Amanda dropped an earring that night. Would you ask her for me if I can reach out to her and I’ll send a pic of it. It looked kind of older and not costume. Sorry to look you up like this but the bartender offered me the credit card receipt to help get you your earing back. Plus, I really enjoyed having fun with you girls so this might actually have been a blessing in disguise. A find instead of a loss."

(borrow a single earing from any girl in your life. They all have one)
(Obviously some of those lines are optional and could and maybe should be tweaked and edited. Its just a rough idea. I think it certainly albeit marginally better than your private investigation tactics.)

Is there anything else that they said that you can give me to go on? Maybe you can orchestrate a little "Serendipity" and "run" into them again. I am masterful at this.

 

[Huffman]

What the hell, a fake story about an earring? I guess it would work, but it wouldn't be my style to go through all this trouble

They're not your coworkers, so you have nothing to lose. I hope you did talk to the friend before, so it shouldn't be a big deal to msg her on facebook. She'll remember you as the guy her friend kinda liked.

Personally I'd just ask if she could help me out (kinda between friends), I was drunk and forgot to ask the number.

Now is not the time to worry about being weird. It's a bit awkward anyway (since you didn't go for it 1st time), but if you manage to go on a date it will be immediately forgotten.

 

[Firestar786]

its just one of them things, you didnt go for the number probably because you sensed she wasnt feeling it.

sometimes girls go to bars etc just to get male attention and somehow that makes them feel better about themselves - ego validation.

its just one of them things that has now passed and gone.

being me i would be direct and to the point and add the freind on FB and see where that leads.