How can I make the most out of college?

[MK1776]

Alright guys, so I'm far from being a DJ, and I'm wanting to use my time in college to become the best version of myself. I've read most of the DJ bible back in my high school days and recently the Rational Male. I'm glad I discovered this stuff because I was really a mess back in the day. My military service has also definitely helped me "man up" a good bit.

With that said, there are a few problems that I'm consistently having and maybe some of you can offer some advice.

1.) I'm a horrible at bantering. I've read many articles on conversation and I have no problem asking "who, what, where, when" questions, I'm decent at picking out conversation trees, etc. but I can't seem to nail that fun banter down that gets people laughing and excited. Also, I trouble talking Sh*t with the guys and playfully picking on them. I get it quite a bit but when I do it back it it's just plain mean or just not funny. With girls, it's much worse.

2.) Abundance mentality is hard for me to attain because I have no abundance. I'm at a small private university and as soon as I got here I hit the ground running to get some numbers. Out of everyone I've talked to, two girls were interested enough to hang out a few times but I messed up things with one, and the second one is slipping away. (I've since toned the approaches down so I don't establish a bad reputation)

3.) I'm not really a fun person to be around, I like to go hiking and have a few hobbies, but for some reason people gravitate towards the guy doing keg stands, wearing a sports coat and a captain's hat. To top it off, my sense of humor is pretty much non existent until I'm drunk and it decides to show itself in a random snippet of conversation. Other than that, people don't get my humor or find it kind of dark at times.

4.) My social life sucked, but I'm making more friends here than I ever have in the Air Force. I even got invited to join a fraternity so I'm hoping to make the most of that.

I'm not very extraverted, growing up I was prevented from having friends/ girlfriends outside of school until I was about 15. So I guess you could say I'm kind of a social retard, because I can get in front of an audience and give an amazing speech or talk about anything work/school related, but I cant be that interesting guy at a party or in a group of friends.

All that said, how do you think I can make the most out of my time here? I hope that by the end of college, I'll be well on my way to being the best I can be. Right now, every thing else seems on track (career wise at least) , I just can't get the social life and getting laid part nailed.

 

[Arcturus]

1. Practice bantering all the time, everywhere you go, everyone you run into, old women, ugly women, guys, just attempt to strike up a one minute conversation and see how smoothly it goes. Practice really helps. You can take a comedy workshop, or watch videos of really witty guys socializing. Do you find yourself anxious or stressed a lot when interacting with people in these situations? Relaxing can really help a lot.

2. You have to push through this, sign up for groups and activities till you start to meet a lot more women. It takes time to establish a rich social circle of quality women. Just keep pushing through and putting in more effort and slowly over time you will build more and more abundance. Remember that you didn't have a connection with these women until ___ months ago, which means there will be others entering and exciting your life all the time. If it happened once it can happen again, so don't sweat if it doesn't work out yet, the value you are gaining from interacting with them is the skill and experience.

3. See #1. All skills take time, effort and practice. The more you practice, the faster you will get better.

Don't look at how far you have to go, think back to how far you have come and let that motivate you. Stay on top of your studies but take advantage of college, by meeting as many people as you can, sign up for as many groups and activities, go out to as many parties or other invites as you can handle. But be careful, it is easy to get hyper focused and let grades suffer. Make sure to compensate for all the drinking in college by staying on top of your fitness.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

I'm kinda in the same boat except my school has around 30,000 people but no one really talks to each other because it's a commuter school. Well all I can say is you gotta always be pushing your boundaries, never turn down an opportunity, and keep putting yourself out there. Just don't try too hard because people will interpret that as you being desperate.

 

[Trainwreck]

Girls should be one of your last priorities in college.

 

[solmanicknight]

Hey man, so I'm really happy I read your post, I feel like I am in a very similar situation. I myself have been reading the red pill on and off for the past couple of months, but I haven't really grasped and started to understand the realities of the matrix of which we live. Let me say I am also just starting college for the first time a little later than others because of 4 years in the navy and would like to maximize my abundance mentality since there are a lot of attractive females at my school.
Something that has really helped with my confidence in every aspect is nofap. That **** works! Read into the science of it and give it a try and you will be amazed!

https://redditblog.com/2016/01/23/t...-any-scientific-benefits-of-not-masturbating/

Anyways, I find myself in the same quandary. Do I want to hit on the hot chick in my class that I force myself to sit next to? What if she rejects me? What if its awkward? Should I just try to pick up on chicks outside of my classes?
I thought about this for a while and realized, that I was spending way to much time thinking about this useless ****. You've read the rational male, think back to where Tomassi is talking about being an Alpha (being in the military should really help you establish this mentality) and how they just don't give a ****. Ultimately you are at school for your own personal education, so who gives a **** if some chick in your English class thought you were weird because you fumbled an attempt. Don't be discouraged with your failures. learn from them and apply your knew knowledge. Here's where nofap comes in. Not having any sexual release except for with females is going to push your subconscious to secure yourself that sexual relation. You will be less intimidated and have more confidence.

 

[macallik]

Arcturus' reply was pretty spot on. One thing I would add is to only read content from the archives on this website. The quality of the posts have gone down dramatically and it has turned into the blind leading the blind more often then not. Older posts tend to not call all women bipolar and talk more about the process than the results.

 

[MK1776]

Hey man, so I'm really happy I read your post, I feel like I am in a very similar situation. I myself have been reading the red pill on and off for the past couple of months, but I haven't really grasped and started to understand the realities of the matrix of which we live. Let me say I am also just starting college for the first time a little later than others because of 4 years in the navy and would like to maximize my abundance mentality since there are a lot of attractive females at my school.
Something that has really helped with my confidence in every aspect is nofap. That **** works! Read into the science of it and give it a try and you will be amazed!

https://redditblog.com/2016/01/23/t...-any-scientific-benefits-of-not-masturbating/

Anyways, I find myself in the same quandary. Do I want to hit on the hot chick in my class that I force myself to sit next to? What if she rejects me? What if its awkward? Should I just try to pick up on chicks outside of my classes?
I thought about this for a while and realized, that I was spending way to much time thinking about this useless ****. You've read the rational male, think back to where Tomassi is talking about being an Alpha (being in the military should really help you establish this mentality) and how they just don't give a ****. Ultimately you are at school for your own personal education, so who gives a **** if some chick in your English class thought you were weird because you fumbled an attempt. Don't be discouraged with your failures. learn from them and apply your knew knowledge. Here's where nofap comes in. Not having any sexual release except for with females is going to push your subconscious to secure yourself that sexual relation. You will be less intimidated and have more confidence.

Thanks man, I don't really masturbate too much but I'll definitely give it a shot just to see if it makes a difference. The not giving a **** mentality is an on and off thing for me, so I'll definitely have to focus on that more.

As for everyone else, thanks for the responses, I'll definitely make use of the advice given here. I'm just hoping it all comes together and I can finally get this game down.
It's just hard for me to find the right balance. I'm naturally an aloof guy who doesn't talk much fluff talk like sports or whatever. However I haven't had much success this way, and I have to put myself in social situations I don't really care to be in most of the time. I'm just really chill and laid back, and I feel the girls go for the high energy drunks that chant and throw beer on each other.

 

[Bible_Belt]

The only permanent record of anything you do in college is your GPA. Don't fvck it up.