How badly did I mess this up?

[B0redandl0nely]

I'm new here and I'll start off by saying I'm a very unsuccessful 26 year old man with mental illness in school full time to get an associates degree that I need to join my city's police department. In the meantime, I'm unemployed and searching for a job to move out of my parent's house as soon as possible.

I recently joined plenty of fish and started talking to a girl. I was feeling good about but I think I got carried away with flirting and that is the reason why she ignored me when I asked for her number. I think I should have asked her more personal questions about herself and what she does. I'm not sure why I didn't. Anyway, here is the conversation:

Me: Hey (girl's name) I love the outdoors and country music too. How's it going tonight?

Her: Thats a good thing and feeling like im Dying how about you

Me: I'm alright but you gotta cheer up play some Florida Georgia Line

Her: Gotta have a little chicken fried and cold beer on a Friday night (except don't do beer lol)

Me: Zac Brown Band, you're my kinda girl

Her: Always know how to win a country boys heart lol

Her: So what brings you to pof

Me: I like to try new things

Me: How about you?

Her: I was bored at 2am and I said hey why not

Me: You made a good profile, caught my interest

Her: Oh really?

Her: Yours is cool but only one pic is very suspicious

Me:I know that's why I'm taking another one right now

Her: Ah lol

Me: Nice ink btw I have a Jesus piece on my back

Her: Thanks and cool

Her: Really into religion?

Me: I used to be

Her: Not anymore?

Me: I haven't been to church in a long time

Her: Ah

Her: If yoy want to be a cop why bio major

Me: I originally wanted to be a physician's assistant but now I see myself as more of a cop. Plus I want a career now and physician's assistant is gonna take more time

Her:Oh okay understandable now so what's with the acting thing?

Me: I didn't like the opportunities I was getting so I was just like enough with this and quit. I still like to play music sometimes though

Her: Ah okay I have extreme stage fright

Me: Aww that's cute. You take some nice pictures though

Her: Nah they suck I don't look cute in any of them

Her: Moonshine my chinchilla is the one cute one lol

Me: I disagree cause I think you have a really pretty face no offense to Moonshine

Her: Aww

Her: Hows your night going

Me: Enjoying it. I have the day off tomorrow. Yours?

Her: Nice and same but because I'm sick

Me: With what?

Her: An extreme sore throat

Me: That's lame. I hope you feel better

Her: Yep and I hope soon

Her: Afternoon

Me: Hey how's it going

Her: Eh still dying like yesterday hbu

Me: Aww I just got out of the gym and feel great

Her: Nice have fun working out?

Me: Yeah and I gotta look good for you you know

Her: True lol but not every one cares about looks

Me: They're not everything. What part of Jersey do you live in?

Her: Matawan hbu

Me: Staten Island but I drive. Let's grab a bite soon

Her: Ah ok sure once in better from this stupid sickness

Me: Sounds good

Me: What's your number?

 

[B0redandl0nely]

Anybody? Please I'm totally isolated and depressed. I just wanna talk about this.

 

[B0redandl0nely]

53 views and no comments?

 

[alx]

You should not have told her you need to look good for her. Sounds needy.

Should have suggested getting a bite to eat way earlier.

Also right from the start she said you look suspicious and then you agreed with her. Wtf.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Understand the culture of this forum. If you are new, it is best to start reading the DJ Bible which you can find at the bottom of the website, or go to the sosuave.com website by clicking the thumbnail 'SoSuave' above. Those help so much more than most people here are willing to. Second, the views represents the number of views in TOTAL. Many views could be coming from someone who is not a member on this website, which would mean that they are not able to answer your question unless they joined. Third, you are doing online dating and while I myself don't do it, a lot of guys on here seem to dislike how it is right now. Regardless, it was only one girl you talked to I presume. You have to talk to more than just one, and understand that you will not be successful every time. But the more you put yourself out there, the more likely you are to get some and the better you get as well.

 

[Square Hammer]

First, I applaud your honesty. We can't improve until we know from where we start. I agree with thedoublegreatest in that reading these forms will really help you.

I also wanted to comment on your ambition to become a police officer. I have worked as one for the past 25 years, and still do.

There are always a lot of vacancies because it can be a tough job to get. If you are 26, unemployed, and suffering from mental illness you might be one of those people who have a tough time.

I'm not trying to be mean whatsoever...just maybe you don't really need a girl in your life right now....focus on getting a good job and working on your health issues. Become the best you, you can be, and the girls will be there for you.

 

[RangerMIke]

Too much texting. Don't waste so much time on chicks you don't know. Build a little rapport and ask for a date.

Anytime a chick mentions ANYTHING negative about herself she isn't interested. If she talks about being sick she isn't interested. You are just wasting your time.

When she said she was sick...you were done. Just tell her at that point if you want to get together when she's felling better to let you know... then move on 99% of the time you will not here from her again.

 

[B0redandl0nely]

I got her number and I feel like calling but you say It's not worth it? I had confidence once before and I'm trying to get it back. You think it would seem desperate to call?

Too much texting. Don't waste so much time on chicks you don't know. Build a little rapport and ask for a date.

Anytime a chick mentions ANYTHING negative about herself she isn't interested. If she talks about being sick she isn't interested. You are just wasting your time.

When she said she was sick...you were done. Just tell her at that point if you want to get together when she's felling better to let you know... then move on 99% of the time you will not here from her again.

 

[RangerMIke]

I got her number and I feel like calling but you say It's not worth it? I had confidence once before and I'm trying to get it back. You think it would seem desperate to call?

Doing stuff doesn't help you, however doing stuff can hurt you if it's the wrong stuff. A chick knows pretty much right away if you are in or out. Don't make the mistake of thinking anything you do will help you... that is why many guys will get into these long text or phone conversations, all this does it puts you in a frame where you are trying to sell yourself. Just ask her out. If she gives you any resistance move onto the next one. Cutting to the chase and just going for what you want builds confidence and saves time.

 

[B0redandl0nely]

I sent a text a day later after getting the number saying hey kaylee it's Ian and she didn't respond. I puss1ed out with the call. How do I stop being a pu$$y? I feel so nervous. I shouldn't still try a call right? Now I feel like I could have talked.

 

[darksprezzatura]

It's a new world you are stepping into, there would be a lot to learn about power dynamics, conversational styles, qualification, non-neediness, amused mastery etc.

I say, start mass approaching whilst reading some material on seduction, to learn to open, get over approach anxiety so you'll always be non-needy about one as you'll know you can just open another cutie.

Apart from that focus on your life and yourself.
The focus should always be YOU, not some chick.

 

[devilkingx2]

I sent a text a day later after getting the number saying hey kaylee it's Ian and she didn't respond. I puss1ed out with the call. How do I stop being a pu$$y? I feel so nervous. I shouldn't still try a call right? Now I feel like I could have talked.

if you text her and she doesn't respond delete the number and move on, she doesn't want to speak to you.

that's the unfortunate truth of the game, lots of girls don't text back