Hot to cold and back again daily...

[pinkfloyd30]

I'm currently trying to build a friendship/relationship with a girl I met a few weeks ago. We live far away from eachother right now but will live in the same city within a couple of months so I'm all for it.

She seems so into me sometimes, and sometimes acts completely ****ty. Oftentimes she will take 8 hours before she replies to my text, even if she sent the first text and I was just replying to her initial message. She told me that everyone gets mad at her for taking so long. I don't mind a few hours but 8 hours does get under my skin a bit. She will talk to me on the phone for hours at a time. She will tell me she is never going to sleep with me at the beginning of the phone call and before the phone call is over we are having phone sex. She seems to be SUPER hot and cold and can change with one phone call. She will say at the beginning of the conversation we should only be friends and at the end of the phone call she is talking about how she really likes me and tells all her friends about me all the time. Sometimes she will ignore me all day then I will wake up to a message at 4AM when I'm sleeping asking me to call her/wake her up real quick before work at 7AM so she can hear my voice. She has this side that seems so sweet but for the most part she is really mean. One day she wants me and is so into me and the next day she doesn't seem to care one bit. What do you think her point of view/thinking is on this thing between us? I know I should run. I just don't have it in me yet to run just yet. I like her a lot. ****ing one-itis. I'm not clingy either on the outside. I don't show that to her. Inside I am. On the outside i never text her until she texts me back nor do I push her or demand her attention.

 

[Vidrio]

You know what to do...

 

[foreverAFC]

sounds like there may be another guy around

 

[GhengisKhan]

Stop trying to build a "friendship/relationship." Pick one or the other. Why does this chick tell you she's never going to sleep with you at the beginning of a phone call... that's a little odd... what did you say to her to get such a response?

 

[pinkfloyd30]

sounds like there may be another guy around

There definitely is at least one. She told me last November she got dumped and it's hurt her deeply and I can see how she puts it on me sometimes. She said she just started getting back out there in the dating game last month. I know one of the guys. He lives really far away but whenever he's in her city they hook-up. She says they have no emotional attachment. It hurts to know but I accept it and am glad she's at least honest about it. She says at any given time she could be seeing 3 diff. guys or maybe no one. We spend hours on the phone every night so I assume I'm the main guy. She told me I'm the main one.

Stop trying to build a "friendship/relationship." Pick one or the other. Why does this chick tell you she's never going to sleep with you at the beginning of a phone call... that's a little odd... what did you say to her to get such a response?

I want a relationship obviously. She keeps changing her mind. Friends one day then relationship the next. I'm guessing right now she doesn't know what she wants and prefers friends with benefits. She claims she won't ever have a boyfriend for many years after the hurt she's been through in the past. We talk like we are dating so I'd say it's a relationship.

When she tells me she's never going to sleep with me it's always brought up and started by her. She always says she wishes I was there and wants to kiss me right now and wants to be laying on top of me BUT...we aren't going to have sex. Then 20 minutes later in the phone call we're having phone sex. She seems confused or is playing some extremely crazy head games.

 

[iamnobody]

]I know one of the guys. He lives really far away but whenever he's in her city they hook-up[/B]. She says they have no emotional attachment. It hurts to know but I accept it and am glad she's at least honest about it. She says at any given time she could be seeing 3 diff. guys or maybe no one. We spend hours on the phone every night so I assume I'm the main guy. She told me I'm the main one.

...
I want a relationship obviously.

Look at what's in bold. Do you really want a relationship with someone like this? So you're the main one in her harem. Should this be the other way around? Shouldn't you be the one with a harem?
Drop her man, drop her and don't look back.
As a side note, read the BPD threads, see if she fits the bill. I think she does. I dropped a BPD a few months ago and I'm much better whitout the hot cold sh1t. If I want the hot cold thing, I'd rather take a scottish shower.

 

[VladPatton]

I don't see what the problem is. She is a girl who is looking for attention when bored, and you are a guy feeding her ego. It is working out well. Nowhere did you mention on how to get rid of her, so my suggestion is to continue the course until she finds a permanent man.